feet on the street

Beneath The Light Of The Moon
  • For the Shin Soukoku Week 
  • Day 1 - Moonlight

They’ve met again, time after time, in the same spot, at night.
The whitish light covered their faces, bringing a certain contrast between the darkness that could be found across shadowed features and paleness of the skin.
Sometimes they met by accident, running past each other in a hurry, only to stop for a few moments and stare without even knowing why before taking off to their planed destination.
Sometimes, they met while drowning in their own loneliness, feet moving carelessly across streets, hair falling into tired eyes, limbs still hurting from a fight. During those moments, they faced each other for a longer time, still refusing to exchange any words, but finding a strange kind of understanding in the presence of their rival. They were too alike, still too different, but alike in way too many ways to keep pretending to feel caged by the same hatred they’ve known before.
They have fought together once, side by side. And they would be doing the same again, judging by the way things were moving. And that changed things. In fact, changed everything.
It brought thoughts - unneeded, unnecessary. Brought confusion and a certain lever a guilt.
They chose to keep those thoughts at bay, to leave them unspoken, to throw them to ashes. Sentences flied around them, going through an endless list of ‘why-s’ and 'where-s’ and 'how-s’ and it seemed like they were going to keep dancing in the air for all eternity.
“How could you be like me? You don’t know me!” Akutagawa’s focused eyes seemed to scream across the field, angry yet confused, mirroring the expression of the other boy.
“You’re a murderer. Cruel, twisted, selfish. Why would you understand and say the things I wanted most to hear that day?” Atsushi clenched his fists, memories flooding through his mind of falling ships and blood and desperation.
They wondered at the same time if there was ever going to be a day when all of those things were to be said at last. Even long after they parted ways, during long days and restless hours, they craved to hear some answers.
But not that night.
In that moment, despite the silence and the thoughtful inner cries, the tiger chose to raise his head and look at the ghostly image of the moon, stuck above their figures like some sort of judge, and just focus on its image.
She was taking in their every action. Every glimpse, every tremble, every type of hesitation.
She was calming. Sweet. Sincere. Brought some numbness to their days of struggle.
'I guess it’s fitting in a way. Finding each other after the sun has set, with you right up,’ he addressed the globe of light in his own mind. 'They say you have a dark part too, hidden in the shadows. Just like us’.
The boy sent a quick look at his companion, finding him too staring at the sky.
His grey eyes seemed empty, lips pulled into a thin line and posture rigid, forced somehow. But it didn’t feel dangerous, just awkward and misplaced.
That image brought a shy smile to the tiger’s face.
'He might hate this, but I’m sure there’s light in him too.’
With this in mind, he took a step back and distanced himself from his former enemy, feeling like he wasted enough time for a single night.
'It really is late. It’s time to go.’
But, before he turned his back, he spared one last glance of Akutagawa’s form, just to take him in - dark clothes and hair gently moved by the wind as celestial whiteness painted his entire form.
'Maybe, Atsushi almost whispered. 'Maybe I’m not the only beast beneath the moonlight.’

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
Move on, leave, run away, escape this place… but don’t forget about me, about us, about this town. Always remember where you come from so you can appreciate how far you’ve come.
—  c.j.n.