feelings of inappropriate proportions

Symphony No 2. in C Minor "Resurrection"
Gustav Mahler
Symphony No 2. in C Minor "Resurrection"

[Gustav Mahler - Symphony No 2. in C Minor “Resurrection”]
Gustavo Dudamel conducts the Simón Bolívar Symphony Orchestra of Venezuela, the National Youth Choir of Great Britain, Miah Persson (soprano) and Anna Larssen (mezzo-soprano)

Cease from trembling!
Prepare yourself to live!

O Pain, You piercer of all things,
From you, I have been wrested!
O Death, You masterer of all things,
Now, are you conquered!

With wings which I have won for myself,
In love’s fierce striving,
I shall soar upwards
To the light which no eye has penetrated!
Its wing that I won is expanded,
and I fly up.
Die shall I in order to live.
Rise again, yes, rise again,
Will you, my heart, in an instant!
That for which you suffered,
To God will it lead you!

Listen to this with high-quality headphones, with the volume cranked up as high as your eardrums will allow.  You actually cannot listen to this loud enough.  I need you to feel this reverberating in your temples, in your chest cavity, in your deepest bone marrow.  Hell, if you have any annoying neighbors worth bothering, put dearest Gustav on the stereo and lay down on the floor in awe.

2

I have the biggest goddamn crush on Gustav Mahler.  His music.  His glasses.  His whooshy hair and giant forehead.  Biggest crush.  So big you can’t believe.  Everything about him makes me want to weep and throw myself face-first off a ship of dreams into an ocean of emotion.

But… He’s been dead for over a century.