feelings never felt before

.and it was a rush of feelings I had never felt before all at 2am

The way cars move
The sound of a laugh I’ve never heard
The mention of a place I’ve never been to
A kiss on the cheek from a friend
A kiss on the lips from a lover
The way I watch others
The way others don’t watch me
The desire to be felt and not seen
Noticed and not held
The way your hair is blond in the sunlight and brown in the shadows of night
Almost like the way you can never make up your mind
The reason for all of these things are all things that I don’t know

Like why I’m never by myself but I always feel alone
Or the way I’ve never experienced all of the things you have
But I desire to

It’s like I lie awake at night and I hear the sound of cars moving
Racing down wherever they are going
And they are going somewhere
And my mind is asking where and my heart is wanting to go along too
To be in one of those cars traveling 75mph in any direction but here
Any place other than this because I swear, I think that there’s someplace out there for me

It’s like I desire so much that it’s killing me
I want to feel that rush
That loss of words
That stunning view that shifts my perspective
That kaleidoscope of feeling that is always certain and sure and steady and explosive
I want to see that love standing right in front me
As heart-wrenching as a sunrise and as broken as human

The way cars move down the highway
A voice saying my name
The sound of laughter
The pounding of tears
The way people never say what they really feel until it’s too late or too soon
The way we fall for people in impossible circumstances
The way cars move down the highway
All going somewhere and I watch them and they don’t watch me
And I wonder where they’re going because I want to go too
And then I watch them fade out into the distance until I don’t see them at all and their engines are too far away to hear
I’m only left with the thumping of my feet and the light from the rising sun
And the desire to be everywhere with anyone all at the same time

Yuuri surprising Victor

One thing that is interesting about Victor is how obsessed he seems to be with surprising people and being surprised. In fact, the very first line of anime tells us that:

In the second episode, we learn that Victor’s main goal as a skater is not to win but to surprise his audience the way he hasn’t before. And it makes sense because Victor is obviously an artist as much as an athlete - he creates stories with his choreographies and he’s extremely talented with that. But now he can’t do it anymore.

When I watched it the first time I thought it was because of the reason Yurio gives in this scene - that Victor was just so good so long that no one is really surprised that he wins. But I don’t think this is really Victor’s case and that’s because of the other thing Yurio says then.

What Victor seeks so desperately that he came to Japan without a hesitation is apparently an inspiration. He can’t surprise people because there’s nothing to surprise him anymore. Nothing except of Yuuri of course. 

Now, let’s stop there for a second. Because we have Victor Nikiforov, who has the world at his feet, who has so much money and is surrounded by beautiful things, who travels around the world and does what he loves for living and he is bored. Or rather tired. Unhappy. Lonely and forgetful and despair. In other words, he’s probably depressed, he wants to feel something true and deep again and he can’t. And this is where Yuuri enters the stage.

Yuuri 

who

surprises

him

all

the

time.

Victor falls in love with Yuuri more and more every day because he makes him feel things he never felt before. Because he’s so beautiful it helps Victor get out from his mental dark place. Because he surprises him. What Victor needed was not only an inspiration for his skating but also to have someone make the same effort for him as he did for other people. And Yuuri does exactly that.

What Yurio doesn’t know in the second episode is that Yuuri is the first and only person that surprised Victor in a very long time. But his words are important because from that moment the only thing that Yuuri wants is to show Victor that he is worth his attention. 

And he does. He does it from the first moment they meet and he really turns out to be the only person to satisfy him.

Victor spend his whole life working very hard to surprise people and make them happy by his skating and it only gave him depression but then the one thing he really needed and wanted was for someone to do the same thing specifically for him and Yuuri showed up and absolutely smashed his expectations. And then Yuuri wanted to surprise Victor as much as he always surprised him at least once and in fact, he has done that every day since they’d met. And this is just so beautiful I may be crying right now.

And then they became canon and surprised us all and I’ll be forever grateful for that.

Inspired by #victuuriweek prompt:
-> Day One: Firsts 
Victor: Surprises

I never really thought that friend break-ups were a thing. Yeah I’ve heard people say ‘we used to be friends’ or ‘we don’t talk anymore’ but I’ve never actually pondered the ending of a friendship.

I’ve witnessed girls going through breakups, and they always talk about the same things. The way one person stops showing interest,
how they talk less, fight about stupid things, stop feeling the spark. I’ve never felt that before. Never watched a person gradually lose interest in me, text me less, stop wanting to spend every second with me.

Never until now. And god, it f*cking hurts.

Who would have thought my first heartbreak would come from my longest standing friendship? But that’s the way life works, isn’t it? You watch the one good thing you have slowly slip away until you aren’t even sure why but suddenly it’s almost out of your grasp and there’s nothing you can do but wait.

So you feel yourself waiting. Waiting for the texts to stop all together, waiting for the hangouts to become a thing of the past. Waiting for that final blow. But nothing could hurt more than the realisation that there will be no 'final blow’. Because it’s already over. And you’re not exactly sure when, or how, but you know if you stop trying now then everything will cease.

And who can you blame but yourself? And do you know what the worst part is? You can’t even be mad at the other person, because what have they done except lose interest in you? It sucks when all you want is to be by their side, to call them and text them and see them everyday, but they’re done with you. And how can you be any more than you are now, I guess you’ll just never be enough.

So you’re left mourning the end of a friendship, without even truly understanding what’s been lost.

And now your heart is f**king broken but who would even understand because are friend break-ups even a f*cking thing?

Aries will make you feel needed
Taurus will make you think you’re wanted

Gemini will let you think about things you’ve never thought about before
Cancer will let you feel things you’ve never felt before

Leo will help you live your life to the fullest without a care
Virgo will help you see your life through more clearly

Libra will talk to you about anything you love and make your eyes sparkle
Scorpio will talk to you until you fall asleep and admire the way the light falls inside the spectrum of your eyes.

Sagittarius will give you a hand to run away with
Capricorn will give you an embrace that feels like home to remind you to hold on

Aquarius will make you laugh and remind you to take care of yourself
Pisces will remind you to take care of the things and people you love

—  What the signs will give you
Sleepovers and Confessions (Peter Parker x reader)

Originally posted by sexy-stan

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Summary: You come over for a fun night with your best friend Peter. Only to end up spilling all the details on your crush on Peter to Aunt May, and maybe even Peter.

Warning: slight language

Requested: @summersimpkins-blog

Hope you enjoy this!! It was what you requested but I got a little writer happy with this haha, hope you still like it! Send me requests, I’ll write about your fav marvel character, etc.:)

_______________________________________________________________

“Shhh, May! Keep your voice down!” You quickly brought your forefinger up to your pursed lips, eyes wide as you sat down next to Aunt May.

She smiled widely at your sudden confession, excitement poured from her she began to squeal, almost jumping up and down, “Okay, okay! I’m sorry, I’m just- it’s just so exciting!” she belted out, both of her arms outstretched in your direction, signalling a hug. Leaning into her small frame, you squeezed her tightly. Letting go of one another, you smiled widely at her once again in a span of thirty seconds, nervousness and the pace of your heart rate caused the giddiness in your entire body.

You sighed tucking back a piece of hair behind your ear, “I just don’t know what to do. We’re just such good friends, best friends, you know that-” you interjected a different thought into the subject, looking to face her. She rapidly shook her head in an understanding manner, stopping to let you finish.

“It’s just, we’ve been friends for close to eight years. I just don’t want to ruin anything. And don’t even get me started on the whole Liz situation. That’s why I’ve been so distant from him these past few weeks,” you heavily exhaled, defeat instantly creeping up on you as the name Liz rolled off your tongue. It just put a bad taste in your mouth.

May smiled weakly at you, with a slight spark in her eyes, which you couldn’t help but find curious, “Y/N, don’t worry about Liz right now! You’ve known me and Peter basically your entire life. Trust me, I think once you tell him, he’ll feel-”

“How will who feel?”

Your mouth instantly intakes a sharp breath at the sweet sound of Peter’s voice, interrupting your entire conversation about… well, him. May’s eyes widen at the new position of her nephew, from the bathroom to the living room, which was quite inconvenient at this moment in time.

“Oh!” May interjects. You can instinctively realize she’s analyzing a plan in her mind, “Me and Y/N were just talking about… how my boss will feel if I’m late again for the night shift!” she says with a tense voice. You looked at her with thankful eyes, blessing her for saving your ass in yet another tight situation with Peter.

Peter looked skeptical at her sudden tactic. His bright brown eyes narrowed in both of you directions, eyebrows playfully scrunching, “Ohh-kay?” he questioned slightly. You looked over at him, a weak, but hopefully believable smile painted across your lips as May got up to leave for her ‘night shift’.  She said her goodbyes to both of you, winking at you before exiting the apartment.

Peter watched her leave, waving to her sweetly before turning towards you, his pink lips curled into a bright smile, eyebrows raised, “You ready to watch Return of the Jedi?”

You smiled at his excitement, the butterflies beginning to erupt in the pit of your stomach at his smile, “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

__

Halfway through the movie, you began to notice you couldn’t keep your eyes on the film. Your Y/E/C eyes slowly began to daze over to Peter sitting next to you. His soft, lightly curled brown hair was left loose today, going perfectly with his blue sweater and matching new balances. Your gaze flew up to his narrowed, sparkling brown eyes paired with furrowed eyebrows, focused intently on the movie.

God, those eyes make you go insane. And those thin pink lips you yearned to forever be placed on yours. Why couldn’t you just admit to him how you’ve felt for him all these years. Why couldn’t you just say, “Peter, I-”

“Y/N?”

The soft voice snapped you out of your deep thoughts, “Yeah?” you questioned, breath heavy as your head whipped in the direction towards him.

His eyes scanned your face completely, wondering if you were okay, due to the fact you had been in outer space, dreaming of him for a very long time, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine Peter. I’m just tired-”

“Cut the crap Y/N.”

Your heart instantly picked up at the new and unfamiliar sound of his voice. Your eyebrows scrunched together, your eyes wide yet peeled in his direction, curiosity running through your veins. He never sounded like that. He sounded almost, hurt? Guilty? You couldn’t quite detect it, “What are you talking about?”

He scooted closer to you, putting one arms behind the back of the couch and one by his side, mere inches from yours. You snapped your head down to your close proximity. Sure, you’ve sat much closer than this before, but right now, it felt strange. Almost as if you were unsure of what to say to him.

“The past couple of weeks you’ve been acting weird. Last week, I was walking with Liz to Calculus and I saw you, but you sprinted off! At lunch two days ago, you and Ned were sitting at the lunch spot and once you saw Liz and I make our way over, you muttered something to Ned before you got up and ran off! Oh, and yesterday Liz walked with me to-”

“That’s the problem, Peter! Don’t you see the recurring issue in every one of your stories!” you cut him off, hopping off the couch in a rush, standing right in front of Peter. Your mind instantly seem to forget how to choose the correct words to say to Peter in this type of situation. It was as if you didn’t know how to hide your feelings anymore. Your mind clouded, not anywhere near stopping.

Your hand flung out by your side, signaling to the outside world before belting out another stupid confession, someone careless seeming to take over, “You were with Liz! You were with her and not me!”

Peter slouched slightly, his eyes beginning to widen at every growing word that rolled off your lips, mouth barely ajar as he seemed to be aware of where this situation was going.

You continued, tears threatening to spill out of your eyes as your stomach did somersaults, and your heart ready to explode, “Don’t you see! You pine after girls like Liz for fucks sake! That’s why I’ve been so distant lately! Me knowing and witnessing  you falling in love with someone like her made me realize I would never have a chance with you, Peter,” your throat closing up at the sudden confession, you eyes widening as he stared intently into your eyes, slowly rising from the couch, stepping right in front of you. His couple steps felt like miles as he made his way towards your downcast figure. Once he approached you, you could lightly feel his breath hitting your nose.

This was it. He was about to tell you the truth, and it wasn’t going to be good. Who would’ve thought a simple sleepover would’ve turned into this?

You could feel the atmosphere in the room quiet and thicken, your eyes still staring deeply into Peter’s. Your eyes glossed over with guilt and disappointment. While his portrayed sneakiness and adventure. It felt like years for either of you to have the courage to speak up and say anything involving the matter. You took matters into your own hands.

“You know what, I took this way too far. I-I’m sorry, I’ll just leave and we can forget all about-” except you were cut off by Peter’s calloused palms quickly yet gently grab your face and bring your lips up to his softly. Your eyes widened in surprise, but you couldn’t of cared less. Your mind once again clouded with nothing but thoughts of Peter. You kissed back, gently pressing your lips back against his, hands wrapping around his neck, to rest in that soft brown hair you yearned to tug on for years.

He pulled away, his lips lingering on yours for a few seconds before slowly opening his eyes to meet yours in a loved daze, “Liz means nothing. You’re all I’ve ever wanted, Y/N Y/L/N.”

Your eyes lifted with happiness at his words, heart prepared to explode with happiness and love, pulling him against your slightly shorter frame. His arms instantly wrapped themselves around your waist, causing an ignited feeling you’ve never felt before.

“I knew May was lying,” he said slyly, hugging you tighter as his words echoed in your ear.

You smiled to yourself, rolling your eyes at his cockiness, snuggling into his warm embrace, “Of course.”

Imagine Your Boyfriend Wants to Breed You

(this is for the people asking for fluffier things. My first submission so I hope you enjoy! I love this page by the way!)

It’s dark in the basement bedroom you and your boyfriend share. Youre still tired, and shift a bit, trying to fall back asleep, but a wandering hand causes your eyes to flutter open. Smirking, you roll over to face your boyfriend, and smile at him. “You’re always so handsy in the mornings,” you murmur, your voice still quiet and sleep-filled.

He smiles and kisses you. “I know you like being woken up this way,” he purs. Sighing contentedly, you nod and kiss him back as his hand pushes your shirt up and kneads your breasts, making you moan. You feel him smirk against your lips, and you smile back. You’re so happy with him, and he plays into all of your kinks. You love it.

He pushes himself up and half pins you under him, one hand roving from your breast down to the hem of your shirts. You arch your back in anticipation as he stuffs his fingers into you, gently messaging your clit. Soon, you start whimpering and panting, writhing against his touch. “Oh, look at you. So eager,” he groans against your ear, and you moan his name, spurring him on. “You make me so hard,” he continues as your orgasm builds. You can’t control the noises coming out of you. You’re whimpering and shaking as your abdomen tightens, your eyes glazing over as you lock eyes with him until finally, you explode, digging your nails into his broad shoulders. “That’s it,” he purrs, continuing to finger you. “That’s a good little pet.”

As you come down from the high he’s just given you, he kisses you deeply, and sweetly before helping you undress. Usually you get time to pleasure him by taking him into your mouth and swirling your tongue over his hot, hard member, but he’s too eager this morning. He obviously wants to be inside of you, and You’re fine with that. You cum even harder when he’s pumping himself into you.

As soon as you’re naked, the two of you are scrambling to get his clothes off. He strokes his cock for good measure, but as he kneels in front of you, he’s already leaking precum, and fully erect. You’re wet from being played with already, but even wetter now that you’re watching him become primal, ready to take you. You spread your legs, preparing yourself whilst he gets a condom, but he doesn’t grab one this time. Instead, he presses your legs further apart, and lines himself up with your entrance. You can feel the hot head of his cock just barely pressing into you, and you want to feel it all the way inside of you. You moan, but stay still, knowing his rule.

“Babe, what about a condom?” You ask, nearly breathless.

He slides his large hands up your inner thighs, and you shiver. “I’ve been thinking about your kink,” he says.

“It’s just a kink,” you interject, slightly panicked, but he silences you by pressing himself inside of you, bare, a few more inches. You gasp. “W-we’re not ready–”

He suddenly slams the rest of himself inside of you, and you scream. It feels so good. You’ve never felt him bare before,and your toes curl. He slowly starts sliding in and out of you, kissing your neck. “I know you want to be pregnant. You’ve told me.” He keeps his tortorously slow pace, and you moan, your eyes rolling back. He slides his hand over your stomach. “You went my children growing inside of you, your tits leaking with milk so as they grow you can feed them.” He starts to speed up, and your moans can’t be contained. He’s really going to do this.  He’s going to knock you up. Instinctually, you lock his hips against yours with your legs. “Good girl. Do you want to feel your master’s cock unload inside your fertile womb?”

“Yes,” you moan. There’s no going back. You’re too far gone. “Put a baby in my womb. Please,” you grind your hips up to meet his. “Breed me.”

He groans, and grabs your chin, making you look him in the eyes. “There’s no going back after this,” he groans. His thrusts are steady, and his voice stern. You’re putty under him, moaning and writhing, gripping his shoulders. “I’m going to make sure you’re pregnant,” he growls, picking up the pace. “I’m going to fuck you again and again until you miss your next period.”

“Yes,” you whimper, watching him and in down at you. He licks a stripe between your breasts.

“I’m marking you in the best ways possible. Everyone will know.” He lifted your legs higher, and slammed into you harder, making your breasts sway and your breath hitch. “I’ll breed you,” he snarled. “Over. And over. And over.” His thrusts punctuated every pause, until finally, he stilled. His cock twitched inside of you, sending you over the edge. You cried out, and your Pussy spasmed greedily around his member. “Good girl,” he moaned as his cock spasmed for the sixth and final time.

Wiping the sweat from his forehead, he grinned down at you, and withdrew his cock with a wet pop. You felt his seed slowly run between your thighs and onto the sheets. It was a delicious feeling. You hummed contently and pulled him to you, kissing him. He tangled his fingers in your hair, and pulled back with a grin. “I can’t wait to see you become a mother.” His hand circled your flat stomach. “Watch you grow bigger.” He chuckled and you blushed.

“Are you really going to breed me over and over?” You asked innocently.

He pulled you to his chest, and whispered. “As many times as your body can take it.”

I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you`re proud of, and if you find that you`re not, I hope you find the strength to start all over again.
—  The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008), Dir. David Fincher
like real people do | jungkook

summary: the feelings for your friends with benefits are changing. months pass, and you feel your gut telling you that you want more. you’re just not sure if he feels the same. 

piece 1, piece 2, piece 3

college student!reader, friends with benefits!jungkook

based off hozier’s song ‘like real people do’

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4


[D-DAY #2YearsWithSEVENTEEN #세븐틴_2주년_영원히_함께해]

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.”


— F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button  


Thank you @pledis_17. For everything.

For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.
—  F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Naruto’s Fatherhood

Okay, I’ve been seeing this whole idea going around for a while and felt the need to address it. A main point in the Boruto movie/series is that Boruto is frustrated with Naruto for not being around due to his Hokage duties. This leads to many fans assuming that Naruto is a bad father by choice. Let’s begin.

Naruto was inaugurated as Hokage after his kids were born. They were both young when this happened, so why is this relevant? Because Naruto had more time on his hands to spend with them, being a father, as he continued chasing his dream. What does this mean? Boruto and Himawari have experienced Naruto’s fatherhood before and after him taking the title of Hokage. 

For children who have consistently been ignored by a parent, it’s safe to assume that by the time they are 11 or 12, they’ve become accustomed to it. Why then, would a child who is accustomed to being ignored and neglected, be so upset about that fact when it’s all they know? Let me remind you all of this scene here at the end of The Last: 

Does this look like a bad father to you? They both attack him, and he receives them with open arms. He suggests a snowball fight, giving in immediately to their request. Children who’ve been ignored wouldn’t feel so carefree as to run into their parent’s arms, demanding that the parent play with them. Is it really that difficult then to make the connection that Naruto, who wanted nothing more than a bond, a family, someone who would receive his love and reciprocate it, gave his kids all of the free time that he had? This brings me to conclude this:

When all of that changes after Naruto becomes increasingly busy in his new position as Hokage, Boruto doesn’t understand how to cope with these feelings because he’s never felt that way before. This is the best explanation for his behavior then. He’s openly upset because he feels as though Naruto suddenly forgot about them, because he’s not getting the same attention he once was. Let me point you to this scene here, in Boruto the Movie where Boruto is looking at all of the photographs in Naruto’s study. 

In all of the photographs leading up to the one farthest right, appearing to be the most recent, Naruto is present and they all appear incredibly joyful. This only solidifies the idea that Naruto had been a wonderful father up until his Hokage inauguration. 

Naruto, on the other hand, has finally achieved his lifelong dream, and being someone who puts everything they have into everything they do, he works hard at his job because it was he who worked so hard to create the peace that he now has the task of maintaining. Is he perfect? No. Naruto has never had to balance family life and work life. He’s always been alone, never having to consider others in his decisions. It’s not difficult to understand then, that Naruto genuinely wouldn’t have understood the implications this would have for his family.

Naruto has never learned how to be any type father, good or bad. He has no example to follow or deviate from. When you’ve never experienced something for yourself, how are you to act upon the situation when it arises? At some point, Boruto brought up his feelings to Naruto in some way, probably through an angry outburst. So how does Naruto handle it? He over-exhausts himself, trying to make everyone happy by maintaining his shadow clones all day in order to get the maximal amount of work done possible and keep his kids from totally hating him. For someone who has desired nothing more than the acknowledgment of those around him since day 1, this behavior makes sense. 

I mean, the disappointment he feels when he’s messed up again? He’s trying his best with nothing to guide him. He sends Boruto congratulatory e-mails, he gives him a pep talk, he wants Boruto to feel acknowledged. Is this the best way to go about it? Maybe not, especially compared to the attention he must’ve given his kids before his new position. But, I sincerely doubt that Naruto is a bad father, nor does he want to be one. It’s a difficult situation for them. The new Boruto series is currently set before the Boruto movie during their academy days, so this must be during the onset of Naruto’s run as a Hokage. Therefore, that scene in today’s episode where he goes straight to bed after coming home is probably before Boruto brings his frustration to his father’s attention, so Naruto is probably unaware of the way his kids are feeling. 

However, Boruto quickly comes to understand Naruto and his struggles when he witnesses him fight the Otsusukis during the movie. Faced with the prospect of losing his father completely, his eyes have been opened to some of the difficulties Naruto faced in his youth. He decides that Naruto shouldn’t have to face more difficulties from the people he loves the most. He comes to terms with the situation by the end of Boruto the Movie, eventually accepting that this is the situation that they are in, and that he’s going to have to make the best of it. 

And if his own son can accept that this is Naruto’s new fatherhood, I don’t see why you guys can’t. 

TL;DR, Naruto’s fatherhood definitely has some bumps in the road, there’s no denying that. However, his intentions as a father are clear, and those are that he loves his kids and wants them to be happy, like a GOOD father would.

This Is War Masterlist

Summary: After being rejected by your best friend Bucky, Sam sets you up with one of his friends, on the condition that if the date doesn’t go well, you have to sign up for a dating app. The date doesn’t go well. As you begin to look for love in other places, Bucky starts to feel something he never felt before. Jealous. 

Bucky Barnes X Reader

Part One

Part Two 

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight

Part Nine

Part Ten

Part Eleven

Part Twelve

Part Thirteen [End]

our little family pt.6 | park jimin

Pairing: Father! Jimin + Reader

Genre: Fluff/Angst + parent au

Word Count: 6.1k

Summary: You were just a pre-school teacher, a simple dream that came true as you always adored children. But what you didn’t know, was how one child and her very special father would change you dream forever.

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6

AN: Ah…the final part. I just want to say thank you for all those who have read and stayed with me through this lovely journey of writing OLF and being super supportive of the story. I tried my absolute best to wrap it up in the nicest way possible (but just a tad disappointed with my writing :/ ) however again thank you so much and enjoy! 

You tied your messy hair up into a ponytail, attempting to get the small, distracting hairs out of your face as you started to take out things from the refrigerator to make Jieun and yourself some lunch.

Hearing small footsteps behind you and a voice call out your name, you turned around from the countertop to see Jieun standing in the middle of the kitchen, her hands rubbing her droopy eyes as she stared up at you, resembling that of a long, lost puppy.

A warm smile spread across your face as you exclaimed, “Hey, look at you, you’re up!” as you lifted the little girl into your arms and spun her around, eliciting small giggles from her mouth before setting her down on the kitchen countertop.

Your eyes glanced towards the time before looking back at Jieun, “Do you feel hungry? It’s almost lunch time.”

She nodded quickly, a big smile spreading across her face when she asked, “Can we eat cookies? I really liked your cookies last time!”

You giggled as you pinched her nose softly, “Uh-huh, you can’t eat cookies for lunch now, can you?! How about we make some macaroni and cheese and then we’ll bake cookies for snack time later? Does that sound like a good idea?”

Her eyes lit up at that as she grinned, “Mac and cheese?! That’s my favorite! Daddy makes it for me all the time.”

“Well then it’s up to you to pick who’s Mac and cheese you like better okay?” you teased, as she nodded happily before whispering to you, “I think you might win Ms. L/N. Daddy sometimes burns the cheese and it turns all black and gooey.”

You laughed at that before saying, “Well, I guess it’s time to teach him how to properly cook huh?”

“Or Ms.L/N could come live with us? Then you can cook delicious food for me and daddy!” Jieun exclaimed, an innocent smile on her face.

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love is love is love // 6.14.16

For what it’s worth. it’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you vant to be. There’s no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people who have a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.
—  F. Scott Fitzgerald

Okay but, I just LOVE the part where Yuri gives Otabek his hand before roughly taking it away because, it’s so THEM? Like this back and forth thing they have, and the fact that Yuri is certainly fighting his feelings for Otabek, because he never felt that way before. And he wants to give in but also he’s not sure if he’s ready. And on the other side, you have ride or die Otabek who’s ready to give whatever Yuri wants and needs. This whole choreography screams Yuri fighting against new feelings and Otabek fighting back and begging him to give in.

I don’t hate you.
I’m not mad at you.
In fact, I hardly
feel anything
at all.

Some days
are better,
the days with
friends and family

when all there
is to do
is celebrate
life in all
it’s splendor.

But on other days,
those quiet,
lonely days,
the hole in the
chamber of my
heart where you
once lived,

feels bigger,
deeper,
the chill of
the winds of
the spring rains
blows right
through it.

I’m not saying
that I feel
incomplete,
because even
before you came
into me
I never felt whole,

But that place
in my heart
that you filled
is empty now,

and all I feel
is hollow
and cold.

—  more passing thoughts of you (5/17/17), thekaijusleeps
Unappreciated

Note: hi sweetie! i’m sorry this took a while! i hope you like it! i’m sorry it’s long. i love all feedback! feel free to leave a comment! ♥ .c

Request: Hiii :) I really enjoy your writing and I just wanted to ask if you could do a Bucky imagine where he doesn’t notice her and treats her badly, despite the fact that she does so much for him and he takes her for granted and he only realizes how much he needs her when she gets terribly hurt. Thank you so much 💖

Originally posted by buckybass



It all started when the super soldier moved into the tower. You couldn’t help but want to get to know him better, though you’ve heard a lot from people in the city streets and the News. But you knew he was more than a Hydra experiment, a brainwashed man who had no choice in the matter, he needed help and you wanted to make his life all the more better.

You were always extremely nice and it took a lot for someone to bring your spirits down, you wanted to help everyone be happy and be okay. Though you knew people needed time and space, they would always come to you for a shoulder to cry on.

Which is why you ended up being there for Bucky; you knew he needed that. You always welcomed him in the mornings with breakfast and a small note containing an uplifting quote. He wouldn’t say anything, he would just give you a tight lipped smile and shut his door in your face. You would shrug it off and tell yourself he wasn’t a morning person.


You were in the kitchen, bright and early, getting Bucky’s breakfast ready. It was nearing 8am and he usually gets up at this time, so you were hoping to get everything done on time. You decided to go with bacon, eggs, grits, and toast. You heard footsteps approaching as you were flipping over the fried eggs, having finished with the grits and bacon already.

You turned with a smile to see Steve and Sam groggily walking in, their pajamas wrinkled and their hair all crazy. “You still make Barnes breakfast?” Sam asked through a rather long yawn. You giggled and nodded. “Yeah, of course!” You said with a chipper attitude. Steve shoved his muscular body onto a stool at the kitchen island, resting his head on his hand.

You turned back to the food and finally got everything ready on a plate and a tray. “Y/N, you’ve done this for like 5 months.” Steve commented as you started to write down an uplifting quote. You shrugged and set the corner of the note under his cup of black coffee. “So?” You asked with a small smile. Steve sighed and shook his head.

Without another word, you slipped off your apron and headed to the elevator, humming as you made your way to Bucky’s room. You walked down the hallway and suddenly Bucky’s door opened, his body leaning against the door frame. You smiled and wiggled your finger at Bucky as he met your eyes. “Hey, Bucky! How’d you sleep?” You asked, walking over to him.

Bucky looked at the tray and nodded. “Fine. This all?” Bucky asked, pointing at the tray. It was a good bit of food you thought. “Oh, did-did you need more?” You asked, your eyebrows raised. Bucky’s eyes lingered on your face before he took the tray from you. “No, this is fine. See ya!” Bucky said before walking back into his room, leaving his door slightly cracked.

You bit your lip as you tapped your fingers against your thighs, slightly peeking into his room. He sat down at his desk and picked up the note you left. “The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places. Ernest Hemingway.” Bucky mumbled. You smiled but it slightly faltered as you watched him scoff and crumble the note, throwing it away.

You sighed and walked away with a shrug, leaving Bucky to enjoy his meal.


You were in the laundry room now, having picked up Bucky’s basket of clean clothes. You picked up on doing his laundry after helping him clean up after a mission. He didn’t seem to mind, so you continued doing it. You tossed his clothes in the basket so you could fold them in his room.

With a smile, you skipped out of the room and bumped into the man himself. “Oof!” You huffed, stumbling back, thankfully having a good grip on the basket. Bucky caught your arm before you could fall and you giggled. “Sorry! I didn’t see you coming.” You said, a light blush dusting your cheeks. Bucky cleared his throat and looked down at the basket. “It’s all good. These done?” Bucky asked with a dull tone.

You nodded energetically. “Yep! I can fold them if you want.” You offered with a smile. Bucky shook his head. “I got it this time.” Bucky said as he took the basket from your hands. He turned and left, stalking off down the hallway. You watched after him, seeing his tense back muscles. Following after him, you rounded the corner just fast enough to run into the elevator.

Bucky moved a little away from you as if to give you more space. You smiled up at him. “I couldn’t help but notice you look a little tense.” You said softly, stepping towards Bucky. He looked down at you with furrowed eyebrows. “And?” He snapped, taking you aback. “Oh, um, well, I was just going to offer a back massage.” You said a little softer now.

And that’s how you ended up sitting butt on butt on top of Bucky, your hands digging into his back muscles. Groan after groan fell from his lips and you smiled. “Feeling better?” You asked, circling your thumbs into a tight knot just below his shoulder blade. Bucky made a grunting noise in response.

You continued for a few more minutes and rubbed in some soothing essential oils into his skin before climbing off of him. He sat up and stretched. “That was amazing, wow.” Bucky said, a small smile spreading on his lips. You capped your oils and smiled. “I’ll see you around.” Bucky said as he slipped his shirt back on.

You watched him leave his bedroom and you stood there awkwardly. Bucky never thanked you for things like this and it was starting to get to you. You do this to make him feel better and it clearly does that for him, but he never shows gratitude. Bucky just leaves and comes back for this special treatment.

A sigh fell from your lips and small hint of sadness started to hit you. You shook it off with a smile and left Bucky’s room to do some other things on your to-do list.


A few days had passed and you still do the same things for Bucky. You recently started to comfort him during the night when he has nightmares. It was hard to see him writhing around, screaming at the top of his lungs, begging for his life. You couldn’t help but…help him.

You rushed into Bucky’s room and saw his large body squirming around, broken screams and strangled cries coming from his mouth. It broke your heart to see him like this. You knelt on his bed and rested your hand on his shoulder. His skin was burning and sweaty as he thrashed around. “Bucky, it’s okay. Please, wake up!” You said softly, brushing his hair off of his sticky forehead.

It took a little coaxing but he shot up, almost knocking his head against yours. Bucky breathed heavily, his eyes searching for the danger he thought he was in. After seeing he was safe, he looked at you. Before you could ask if he was alright, he pulled you into his body. “Shh, you’re okay.” You whispered as he cried into your shoulder.

Bucky held onto you and you rubbed his head, your arms wrapped around him. “I promise you’re safe, Bucky.” You whispered soothingly. He hesitantly nodded and sighed into you. His arms held you closer as he continued to calm down. “That’s it.” You softly praised Bucky, his hands releasing their tight hold on your shirt.

You held him close and whispered soothing things in his ear, gently stroking his hair. Bucky clung to you, his breathing coming to a smooth rhythm. “Please, stay.” You barely heard Bucky mumble, his face nuzzled into your chest. “I will.” You whispered back, holding him tightly as you both fell asleep.


Bucky woke up with you draped across his chest, your breathing steady and soft, the little air coming from your nose tickling his skin. His heart fluttered as he stared at your face, peacefulness resting on your features. Bucky reached his hand to your face, outlining the curve of your jaw. The twitch of your lips made him feel something he’s never felt before. And boy did it scare him.

Bucky suddenly pulled out of your hold and stood out of his bed quickly, startling you out of your sleep. You groaned and rubbed the sleep from your eyes, sitting up in Bucky’s bed. “Bucky?” You asked, yawning into your hand. “Get out.” Bucky rasped, slipping on a clean shirt. His previous shirt was discarded on his floor from his body sweating him out.

You looked at him, concern all over your face. “What?” You questioned, moving his blankets off of you. Bucky was breathing heavily and he turned to you. “Why do you help me? Why do you do things for me?” Bucky asked, raking his hand through his hair. You smiled a little. “I just want you to-” “-to be happy? To get better?” Bucky finished your sentence. He scoffed and shook his head.

You stood to your feet and walked over to Bucky slowly. You reached out to hold his arm but he jerked it away, his eyes looking into yours. “Y/N, stop! Just go! I don’t need you!” Bucky yelled at your face, causing you to flinch. The wave of sadness hit you again, twice as much this time. You frowned and retracted your outreached hand, your fingers trembling.

Bucky turned his back to you and you backed away from him, leaving his room. What was wrong with him? What did you do? You thought helping him and showing kindness towards him would get him to open up to you. You didn’t know it was making things worse. He never thanked you for anything and you let it go, excusing his ungratefulness as just having a wall built up.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and went your room, locking yourself in there to get ready for the day. You sat on your balcony a little while later and looked out at the cloudy sky. The city below was busy as ever and you usually felt happy watching the people far below, but now, you didn’t feel it.

Your lip quivered the longer you thought about this morning. You just wanted to help him and make him look forward to something nice in the mornings and during the day. The quotes were to help him realize he’s not as weak and broken as he thinks.

A knock at your door pulled you from your thoughts and you sighed, waking into your bedroom. You opened your door and saw Steve standing there in his suit. “Hey-wait, what’s wrong?” Steve asked quickly, seeing your watery eyes. You’ve never cried in front of the team, and you never did at all, really. It took a lot for you to get like this and Bucky did it so easily.

Steve stuck his shield to his back and held your shoulders. “Y/N, talk to me.” Steve pleaded, his blue eyes searching yours. You took a deep breath and swallowed thickly. “Bucky, he-he just got angry this morning. I-I heard him having a nightmare last night so I did what I do best and helped him. He shot out of bed and yelled for me to get out.” You explained, holding in the sob  that wanted to desperately escape.

You sniffled and Steve bent to give you a tight hug. “You’ve done so much for him, Y/N. He still needs time.“ Steve said quietly. You nodded, your arms around his neck. “He’s never shown any gratitude. I figured he just needed that shell to break.” You said, your voice shaking. Steve sighed and pulled away from you. “I’ll talk to him.” Steve said as his frown deepened.

You shook your head quickly, “No, don’t worry about it.” You sniffled again. “Is there a mission?” You asked as your eyes fell to his suit again. Steve slapped his hand against his forehead. “Shoot! Yeah, I need you for guard duty. Nat is coming along to gather information.” Steve explained as you listened closely.

After suiting up and pushing your thoughts about Bucky aside, you walked out of your room and gathered around the team in the common room.

“This should be really easy, you know what to do.” Tony said, speaking to Steve. The others wished you good luck, all except Bucky. He was off to the side, arms crossed and brows creased. He looked troubled, almost like he wanted to say something. You glanced over at him and his eyes met yours, only to flicker away.

You sighed and Nat walked over to you, linking her arm with yours. “Steve told me what happened. I need you to focus, okay?” Nat whispered, her eyes soft. You nodded and swallowed the lump in your throat. “I know.” You said softly.

Steve finished talking with Tony and you all set out on the mission. It took about 4 hours to get there and you had to walk down a wooded trail to get to the base. You were crouched down with Steve and Nat, guns aimed with silencers. “Ready.” Steve said, cocking his gun. You all had to take out the guards out front, so you readied your gun and aimed for any guard you laid eyes on.

You took them down in record time and slowly made your way to the base. Steve kicked in the door and you shot down a guard inside, watching his body instantly fall to the ground. “Okay, Nat you know what to do. I’m right beside you.“ Steve said, leaving you outside to keep watch.

You looked around, keeping your eyes focused and your gun ready. You could hear Steve and Natasha fighting throughout the base in your comm, grunts and hits coming from them. Still looking around the area, you noticed a small movement in the woods in front of you. Your heart jumped in your chest as you slowly held your gun up, scanning the area.

Steve grunted into your comm and you heard Nat yelling curse words. “Y/N! We need you in here!” Steve yelled, his shielding ricocheting off a wall, hitting a guard. Before you replied, you quickly scanned the area once more, hoping it was just an animal you saw rustling in the woods. “I’m coming.” You responded, retreating backwards and turning into the building.

As you walked down the hallways that was covered with dead bodies, you listened for your teammates. “Where are you guys?” You asked, stopping as you approached another hallway. “Take the stairs,we’re on the second floor,” Steve grunted loudly, “There’s a lot more guards than we thought!” Steve called out, gunshots ringing through your comm.

You quickly ran to the door that held the staircase behind it and made your way up, hoping you got there in time. You could hear Steve and Natasha yelling, their weapons going off. “Guys, I’m almost there!” You yelled, keeping a tight grip on your gun. You finally reached the top of the stairs and rounded to the second floor.

You immediately started shooting at any enemy you laid your eyes on. Steve was going to hand to hand with a guard, his shield stuck in the concrete wall. You quickly glanced at Natasha after shooting two more guards down. She used her signature move on one guard and round house kicked another, knocking them both out cold.

A guard to your left aimed his gun at you and you were able to shoot him first, the bullet piercing through his chest. “Nice!” Steve yelled, a smile on his face. He twisted the guards neck and sighed out, pulling his shield from the wall. Natasha finished off the guards around her and you looked around, seeing all of the lifeless bodies.

You wiped your brow and took a deep breath. “Okay, now that that’s over, there should be a vault in the room.” Natasha said, her boots clicking as she walked towards the door, moving around the bodies. 

Steve didn’t lie when he said there were a lot more than they thought. Nat kicked open the door, holding her gun up. “All clear.” She said into her comm. Steve joined her in the room, helping her open the safe.

Putting your gun in your holster, you crossed your arms, waiting for Steve and Nat to finish. A deep chuckle came from behind you, making your heart jump. You whipped around just in time to feel a bullet pierce through your abdomen. You gasped, looking down at the blood starting to pour out of you. “Y/N!” You heard Steve and Nat yell, Steve taking the guard down.

You fell to your knees and the two rushed over to you, Steve grasping hold of your body before you fell onto the floor. “Shit!” Nat yelled, holstering her gun. 

You were breathing heavily, though every breath you took made your body ache and the pain worsen. “St-Steve.” You winced, squeezing your eyes shut. Applying pressure to your wound, Steve rushed you out of the room.

Steve was yelling at Nat to call Bruce, to tell him you need him as soon as you land. “Y/N, you have to stay awake!” Steve yelled, shaking you lightly enough to make your eyes peel open. You felt Nat’s hand putting more pressure on your wound and looked down, your bodysuit a dark color from the blood. The pain was unbearable, the last thing you heard was Nat and Steve calling your name.


The jet landed and Steve carried you out, meeting Bruce on the roof with a gurney. “She-Bruce, please.” Steve sobbed as he looked down at your pale face. You looked lifeless, just like the enemies you had taken out. “I’ll take care of her.” Bruce assured Steve, quickly rolling your body away.

Nat took a deep breath as they walked into the elevator after Bruce had wheeled you inside and took it down to the medic room. “She can’t die.” Steve’s body shook with another sob and Nat looked up at him, her own eyes threatening to spill with tears. “She won’t. Not Y/N.” Nat whispered, scared her voice would break her tough facade.

The two walked into the common room and met with the others. “Hey! You’re back!” Sam cheered but stopped when he looked at Steve and Nat’s faces. “What happened?” Tony asked, taking his glasses off. “Whose blood is that?” Clint asked, causing Steve and Nat to look at your blood on their hands. Wanda stepped forward. “Where’s Y/N?” She asked nervously. Bucky entered the room and noticed how quiet it was. “What, did someone die or something?” He asked jokingly.

Bucky looked at Steve, his smile dropping. Bucky took in everyone’s scared expressions. He looked around for you, but he knew something was wrong when he didn’t see your bright and beautiful smile greeting him like you always did. 

“Wait, where’s Y/N?” Bucky asked, feeling his heart starting to beat fast. Steve shook his head and tried to speak, but nothing came out. Steve looked at his bloody hands again and his lip trembled. Bucky gasped, his eyes falling to Steve’s hands. “No. She’s-Steve, don’t do that to me.” Bucky said, shaking his head, his knees feeling weak.

Nat walked over to Bucky and looked at him sadly. “Bucky, she got shot. Bruce is taking care of her now.” Nat explained as best she could, her voice shaking. Bucky noticed the blood on her hands too as tears filled his eyes. “If this is-is some sort of sick joke.“ Bucky choked out, a lump forming in his throat.

Steve sniffled and shook his head. “Buck, it’s not.” Steve said, looking at Bucky as flashbacks played throughout his mind. “Stop! She can’t-FUCK!” Bucky yelled in the all too quiet room. Bucky rushed out, walking straight towards the elevator. All he could think about was you, the whole time you were gone, Bucky thought of how badly he had treated you.

He knew he took you for granted, he didn’t realize how much you did for him until you left his room after he made you leave. He never knew how much you actually meant to him. Bucky wanted to apologize and tell you how he felt when he woke up next to you and he hoped it wouldn’t be too late.

The elevator stopped and Bucky ran out, his feet carrying him down the hallway. He could hear a heart monitor going off and he ran up to the large window, seeing Bruce stitching you up. There was blood all over his gloves and a bit around your stitches. Bloody tissues filled the small trashcan beside Bruce’s feet and it made Bucky’s heart clench.

Your body was pale and it scared Bucky. It scared him because he realized he did need you. You tried so hard to make Bucky feel something, feel happy, feel better, feel…loved. Bucky’s tears fell, his chest rising up and down heavily and fast as he watched Bruce finish up.

Bucky knew you’d be okay now, but he just couldn’t help but feel like the biggest piece of crap because of how he made you feel before you left. He realized his mistake and he desperately wanted to make it better.

Bruce turned to see Bucky looking through the glass window and waved him to come inside. Bucky took a deep breath after wiping his tears away. He took slow steps, afraid his presence alone would cause more damage. Bruce watched closely as Bucky walked toward your body. His eyes took in your current state and he felt even more guilty.

Bruce was writing down information on his clipboard and he sighed softly. “She should be awake soon. The medicine I gave her wears off in just enough time.” Bruce told Bucky, watching him grasp your hand gently. Bucky nodded slowly, his eyes on your closed ones. He reached up to your face, his finger caressing along your jawline like he did this morning.

Deciding to give you two a bit of privacy, Bruce quietly exited the room and left to notify the others on how you’re doing. Bucky took a shaky breath before speaking. “Y/N, I’m so sorry.” Bucky whispered, his eyes filling with tears again. “I was so horrible to you.” He choked out.

He saw your eyelids flutter before slowly starting to open. His heart skipped in his chest and he rubbed your cheek with the pad of his thumb. “That’s it, Doll. Come back to me, please.” Bucky whispered. You squinted your eyes a tad at the bright lights and Bucky moved closer, blocking it for you.

You groaned and tried to sit up, not aware of the stitches in your abdomen. Bucky held you down gently. “Y/N, don’t move.” He spoke softly. You relaxed again and licked your dry lips. You sighed and looked up at Bucky. “Why are you here?” You asked rather coldly, not meaning to, though you didn’t apologize. 

Bucky sighed and frowned at your sourness towards him. He was used to you being sweet, but he reckoned he ruined that for good. “I know you might hate me now, but I realized something after, you know..” Bucky trailed off, staring down at you. Your heart sank as you took in his watery and puffy eyes. He had been crying and it was probably because of you.

You watched Bucky’s lip tremble and you reached your hand up to hold his that was still resting on your cheek. “I’m sorry I never appreciated you.” Bucky said, his words holding more than he led on. You knew what he meant and you nodded gently. “I’m sorry if I was too much. I won’t do it anymore.” You whispered, letting your hand fall from Bucky’s.

Bucky nodded gently. “I don’t mind if you don’t want to do things for me anymore. But I do want you to keep trying with me. Y/N, I-I need you.” Bucky said, a sob wracking through his body. Your eyes lifted to Bucky’s and you furrowed your eyebrows. “You what?” You asked, not believing what Bucky just said.

Your heart started racing as Bucky bent down, slowly leaning in to press his lips to yours. You gasped before kissing him back, your hand reaching up to rest on the back of his head. Your heart monitor started beeping faster and Bucky pulled away, a smile on his face. “I said I need you. I was wrong before, so so wrong.” Bucky whispered, leaning his forehead against yours.

A smile formed on your lips in return and you giggled. “I’ll always be here, Bucky.” You said, your hand resting on his cheek. Bucky sniffled and kissed your forehead. “I want to take care of you until you get better.” Bucky said, raising up so he could look at your bandage. You gently sighed and frowned. “But I-” Bucky shushed you. “Y/N, you’ve done so much for me.” Bucky said, holding onto your hand.

You nodded and smiled at Bucky, your happiness fluttering back into your chest.

Note: TBH I THINK THIS SUCKS BUT YET I THINK IT’S REALLY CUTE .c

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