who else REALLY wanted to go to “fat camp” as a kid/teen? and/or get lipo and/or partial stomach amputation?? (and/or actually did)

like. im sure i still would if i hadn’t changed my perspective…

it’s sad though, how much $ is made convincing fat people we simply cannot control ourselves and need to buy drugs, surgeries, professional coercion, to fix it. as long as you are fat you must not have the right behaviors, so you must not know and/or lack the discipline to apply them (or motivation, self respect, etc).

i think about abusive and toxic circumstances i have been in, and my mood swings and my adhd, making me feel like i can’t trust myself or my own perceptions and am inherently (helplessly, inevitably) just too focused on my own impulses in the present moment to make good decisions or follow helpful routines

and right now im thinking, i should add fatness (fatphobia, actually) to the list of things that have lead me to doubt myself in this way. that’s got to be really buried deep and tied to a lot of things tbh but making this connection is a step.

As a younger me, I was always called names like ‘fat’ or ‘chubby’, and it really affected the way I see myself and how conscious I am about my weight. Being a curvier girl, I know that I’m heavy, but I can’t stand the fact that people see the word ‘fat’ as being bad. So, I’ve been trying to desensitize myself to it, and for some reason I felt like doing a doodle based off of it. 

‘Fat’ isn’t a bad word. It’s a descriptive word that has been given bad context by bullies and people who don’t appreciate the person beneath the skin. So yes, I am FAT. I am round, chubby, curvy, chunky, pudgy, big boned, I am a bigger girl. But that does NOT mean that any of those words are bad things to say. Only if they are used by bullies. 

I relate to umji in a lot of ways, and because of that I really love her (she’s my bias in gfriend). We’re the same age, and have never fit the beauty standards bc we’re considered ugly and fat and stuff. If I were in her shoes I wouldn’t have even tried to be an idol, but she did, and she debuted, and is now in one of the top ggs of this generation. She deals with a lot of hate for someone who’s barely an adult, but she handles it really well.

anonymous asked:

Hello this will sound stupid probably but how do you do head/face construction outlines or how you think the best way to do it is

ahhh hmm.. I will try my best to give you some info at least on how i do it/good things ive seen? I don’t have a lot of rules about my faces and I tend to just kind of Go At It a lot of the time? But I can give you some things to think about or the techniques I like to use. There are lots of ways to construct heads and stylize faces. 

I think the most important things I keep in mind, like with everything else, is that the head is a solid object with volume, and that it has its own muscles and fat and stuff. 

in terms of anatomy, with the way i stylize stuff, i like to show a few key things

1) The head is not separate from the neck, and it is not just sitting on the next like a lollipop. The neck interacts with the head. Most people also have at least a little bit of neck/chin fat, if not just loose skin there so that you can move your head. that area is in general soft. 

2) the eyes are In the head, not just stickers on the head or spheres stuck to the head. (of course, this is not the only way to stylize, this is just what I like to show) the eyes are set into the cheek.

3) the mouth area makes no sense like thats not how that works but don’t worry about it. 

the most basic way i construct a head is i start with like, a sphere, which im sure you’ve seen before: 

the lines of the symmetry for me are pretty rough. i don’t follow them very specifically. I use them more for like “the head is facing this direction on this axis and this direction on this other axis” 

vertical line is how far left or right its rotated, and the horizontal is how far up or down. I know the horizontal line is supposed to also be roughly where the eyes go, but I don’t really follow that too carefully. I mean it helps figure out where the eyes are going to be, but if it ends up not feeling right, be free to adjust. It’s more for keeping the head volumetric.

then i have a second oval (of varying shapes for different faces) for the lower half of the face. the top of the cheek starts roughly at the horizontal line of symmetry. I tend to think of this also as a volume. 

This maps out the entire lower half of the head for me, so im sort of like, drawing all the way around underneath the head if that makes sense? it’s very helpful for drawing heads in weird perspectives. For example it helps with over the head perspective a lot because it sort of puts the jaw underneath the cheek bones, underneath the forehead, etc. 

then i construct the face over that, using the nose to indicate direction by keeping it right on the vertical axis or floating over the vertical axis.

In doing facial expressions, I think something really important to keep in mind is the retention of mass. Like, even when you’re stretching the face really far, don’t add mass. (at least, for the style that i’m working with. this isn’t applicable to all styles) This combined with remembering what parts of the face are hard and what parts are soft will make characters seem, more, Solid. 

so like: 

the jaw doesn’t grow or shrink with the mouth opening, there’s still the same amount of chin. the jaw opens to open the mouth, the upper teeth are not on a hinge so the lower jaw is the only thing that moves.

I totally do not always follow this, though. 

like, the chin here is probably a little bit “shrunk” to accommodate the mouth. However, other thing to think about that I’m trying to show with this, is that when one part of the face moves, so does the rest of it. Even if the facial anatomy isn’t realistic, it still all interacts. Like, the mouth opening up that wide smushes up the cheek muscles into the eye. (even though the mouth is just kind of drawn as a hole in the face) 

(more examples of this)

even if the face is kind of “rubbery” here, though, the overall mass is still kept consistent. like its stretched in the second on, but it hasn’t “grown” 

flesh is pulled over an imaginary skeleton underneath, and there is still “depth” shown by the angle of the teeth. there is also thought about how the eyes are sitting in their sockets, even though those sockets are being “stretched” a little bit. 

I hope this isn’t a completely incoherent mess and that its at least somewhat useful information? 

*crawls out of my hole to rant for a sec*

The problem with the Chloe Grace Moretz animated Snow White film isn’t the crap marketing campaign. Supposedly the film has a “great message” about self-acceptance or whatever, but the movie seems to present being fat as something less desirable in the first place. It’s like they’re saying, “MOST OF THE WORLD will see you as gross if you are fat, but not us! We’re trying to empower you!” 

My boss told me a story about a friend of hers who has a small son, and this kid has a healthy outlook with regard to gender roles and gendered toys and such. He plays with dolls all the time and has never thought of it as a subversive act. His mom had a sort of misty nostalgia for Free To Be You And Me, the book & record from the 70s about bucking gender stereotypes, so she played the album for him, and there is a song about a boy who plays with a doll despite the fact that everyone says boys shouldn’t play with dolls. Her son was like, “Boys shouldn’t play with dolls?” Playing with dolls was presented as normal to him his whole life up to that point, and it was only when this piece of media, which is ostensibly saying that it’s okay to play with dolls, said it was weird, that he questioned whether it was okay to play with dolls. 

So I mean, here’s the thing. If you want to have a fat Snow White, just have her be fat and don’t make it an issue. Don’t make her fatness something other characters have to overcome in order to see her as beautiful, because that undercuts any message of body positivity that the movie is trying to communicate. In movies and stuff, fat women are alwas portrayed either as massively insecure and constantly trying to lose weight, or if they are confident, their confidence is played for laughs. Like, how dare this woman see herself as desirable! I have so little patience for this stuff, man! It doesn’t take a genius to figure this stuff out, and yet so often, media gets it so very very wrong.

  • Psychic: *reads my mind
  • My mind: Fast food
  • Greasy
  • Taco
  • I love
  • Nacho bell grande
  • Cheesy gordita
  • I like your nachos
  • Like diarrhea
  • Man I really like
  • Taco bell
  • I know I can't
  • Watch you make my food
  • Drop on the floor
  • I think it's rude
  • Man I really like
  • Taco bell
  • [Chorus: ]
  • Here's to the Mexican
  • Who makes me my food (me gusta)
  • How is that I just ate
  • Now I have to poop
  • Fast food
  • Greasy
  • Taco
  • I love
  • Food like this
  • Could only come
  • From above [x2]
  • [Jay Joseph: ]
  • Robbed a taco store and asked them for a refill
  • Hey this is JRizzle
  • Listen up all y'all
  • I'm winning tacos just because of this gumball
  • I put chalupas where my mouth is
  • So watch this
  • Because I'm the dopest rapper
  • That you've ever messed with
  • Sir, welcome to Taco Bell
  • May I take your order
  • Yeah can I have a big mac and a pepsi
  • Sir we don't sell big macs
  • And some chicken nuggets
  • We don't have chicken nuggets either
  • Sauce!
  • T-A-C-O B-E double L
  • The cashier's name is Omar Vizquel
  • People always
  • Persecute me
  • But I know they'll die
  • For eating Chipotle
  • How is it that you
  • Could hate
  • Good old taco bell
  • And how is it that you
  • Could like Chipotle
  • We walked into the Taco Bell
  • Because I was craving some crunchy shell
  • The man behind the counter said oopah (oopah)
  • I was flying as high as a kite
  • And I looked up to my delight
  • They were having a special on chalupas
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • And as you know there was a man
  • Who preached the truth
  • On rock and sand
  • And Jesus won't hold your sins to you
  • And we all know that he broke the bread
  • But I know that St. Peter said
  • That his favorite food was chalupas
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • My chalupa
  • I love this song
  • Beef
  • It's a good song
  • And Cheese
  • Beef and cheese
  • Beef and cheese yeah
  • Beef and cheese in a taco shell yeah
  • Beef and cheese in a taco shell
  • Take that it'll make you fat
  • We got the stuff that'll make your booty go
  • Take that it'll make you fat
  • We got the stuff that'll make your booty go
  • Take that it'll make you fat
  • We got the stuff that'll make your booty go
  • Take that it'll make you fat
  • We got the stuff that'll make your booty go
  • Beef and cheese
  • Beef and cheese
  • And lettuce
  • Beef and cheese
  • Beef and cheese
  • And lettuce
  • Beef and cheese
  • Beef and cheese
  • Okay
  • And lettuce
  • Beef and beef and cheese
  • Now is the time
  • That we end this song
  • Without tacos
  • Life would be wrong
  • Man I really love taco bell
  • Michael was right
  • Tacos are great
  • If you're real hungry
  • They're open real late
  • Man I really love taco bell
  • [Chorus]
  • I'm full
  • So dude there's these two black guys in a bar
  • Hey shh we're still recording
  • [Unintelligible burps and noises and laughing]
  • Psychic: what the fuck

Sewing For Plus Sizes by Barbara Deckert is one of the books youse all helped me buy! It has some quasi/ basic fat activism stuff in it but also gets tripped up by “the last socially acceptable prejudice” rubbish. I like how thoughtful it is about working with a big tummy, also the supersize potato body shape, the models and the fat potato body diagram!

Unfortunately I got super busy at work so this is as far as I got.