fat-sexuality

anonymous asked:

I'm surprised and happy to see you're still around! You were kind of a childhood crush. I found your pictures somehow when I was young- I think through a stock image site or something! I assumed you'd have stopped modelling years ago, but it's great to see you're still here and just as attractive as ever!

Thank you so much! 

I love hearing from the guys who had crushes on me as a youngsters so I can apologize – I didn’t mean to do any harm!  ;-)

I have had some great feedback from young men and women over the last several years. There was one guy that came up to me at a bash that told me when he was a young teen, he was suicidal because of his preference for fat women. He happened upon my site one day and realized he wasn’t alone. He said I saved his life. It made me cry. Still does a bit when I think about it. 

I had always hoped my site would be a positive influence. Early on I applied the tagline on my site “Changing the World’s View of Fat Chicks, One Visitor at a Time”. I figured at best I would sway some minds into thinking that fat people were ~OK~ and not just objects of ridicule. I also hoped that I would help other fat women see that they’re not limited to a life of self-hatred, that there is another way to live.   Over the last 18ish years, I’ve heard from LOTS of people who fell into those categories. It always felt good to hear. 

But, I didn’t envision impressionable minds looking at my site and helping form/express/hone their sexual preferences. Nor did I expect to to save any lives.  

Can you imagine? A few simple pixels on a screen can do these things?? 

So much of what we hear in the media these days is how these simple pixels can do harm. Cyber-bullying, as an example.  Aside from the large waves of pixel pushing influence where positive bandwagoning begins, very little positive coverage ends up in the media. The little positive beacons aren’t really heard on that level, but I know from my experience, the little positive sites are doing good one page hit at a time.

Researcher Looking for Self-Identified Fat Young Adults of Color

Fat studies researcher looking to pay $10 to self-identified fat young adults of color for interviews on fat identity, sexuality, race, and the Internet.

Hello everyone!

My name is Philippe Fradet and I am a graduate student at San Francisco State University in the Sexuality Studies program. I am seeking participants for a study with self-identified fat young adults of color who currently live in the United States. I’m looking to interview people of any gender and sexual identity, of any socioeconomic background, and of any physical and mental ability status. Interviews in this study will focus on four topics:
· fat identity, including self-acceptance and personal histories;
· sexuality, including sexual identity, sexual practices, and sexuality as a fat individual;
· race, including the interactions of race, fat identity, and sexuality;
· and the Internet, including how the Internet is used to build community and support.

If you are interested in participating in this research or if you have any questions, you can contact me either by email at pfradet@mail.sfsu.edu or by sending me an “ask” or “submission” on my Tumblr (fatdisid.tumblr.com) with your Tumblr account.

When you contact me, please let me know a bit about yourself and your interest in the project. In order to participate in this study, you must identify as a fat person of color and be between the ages of 18 and 25. Participants will be given a $10 gift card to Amazon.com for participating in the project. All interviews will be conducted using the voice chatting or phone call features of Skype, which means anyone in the United States is welcome to participate. Your name and participation in the project will be kept confidential, and you can contact me with any questions. I will be posting any pressing questions about the project on this blog.

Thank you for your interest!

 

Philippe Fradet
Master’s Candidate
Sexuality Studies Department
San Francisco State University
fatdisid.tumblr.com
fatdisid@gmail.com
(415) 799-7109

Have you noticed that on television and in the movies, any time a fat person gets into a sexual relationship, the primary storyline is about the emotional conflict of whether their partner actually finds them attractive and the angst around taking off their clothes? I recall vividly a scene in The Practice between Camryn Manheim’s character and her tall, thin, handsome would-be lover, where she expressed her trepidation about sex with him because of her body, and his exclaiming, “Don’t you think I find you attractive?” She broke down in tears (maybe she didn’t, but in my storyline tears come next), and he swept her off her feet – figuratively.
— 

Rebecca Jane Weinstein, author of Fat Sex: The Naked Truth"

The Truth About Fat Sex

2

Every Thursday we run a feature on Chubstr called Answerland. It’s basically a way for us to answer some of the questions we get from readers on a regular basis. The questions we get cover everything from food to fashion to sex. 

Last year, the amazing Hanne Blank asked me to write a blurb for the revised edition of her book, Big Big Love. If you’ve got questions about love, sex, or intimacy as it relates to being a person of size, I definitely recommend this book. You’d be hard pressed to come up with a question that isn’t somehow addressed within its pages. Learn more about the book at Chubstr, and follow Hanne on Twitter

So like, I’m fine at playing along with the “girl talk” and whatever you call that when you’re all “OMG I would soooo do him. He’s fucking HOTTT” but then when we’re being real with how and who I’m attracted to it’s different because I feel like I have to really know someone and connect with them before I can really develop any romantic/sexual feelings. And then this leaves me in the awkward pool of being super confused because I can’t tell if I’m trying to befriend someone, or if I’m crushing on them.

Then there’s the awkwardness of last night where I may have had someone outwardly say they were flirting with me. But it was a joke. And idk. I’m usually the type to be like HAHAHA NO LIKES ME EVER so I don’t even think it’s possible. And on one hand, maybe I’m leading them on (though things felt awkward when I left, so that may be done) and on the other hand, maybe I want to lead them on because I’m attracted to them (but I don’t know if I can and I don’t want to be an asshole).

For basically all my life I’ve never had crushes returned so the idea that maybe, just maybe, I’m not completely delusional is putting me in a weird state.

pandabearshape.wordpress.com
NYMPHOMANIAC (2014, DIR. LARS VON TRIER); CONCUSSION (2013, DIR. STACIE PASSON)

[CW diet talk, discussion of consensual sex]

Two recent films, Nymphomaniac and Concussion, spend ample time exploring the marginalized sexualities of their (thin) female protagonists. Joe (Charlotte Gainsboug/Stacy Martin), the titular character of von Trier’s epic, labels herself as a nymphomaniac and constructs her life around her insatiable libido; Abby (Robin Weigert), the heroine of Passon’s directorial debut, is a lesbian who subverts her life as a mainstream upper middle-class homemaker by involving herself in sex work. Both women have fat sex partners over the course of their respective stories, neither of whom function as a source of comedy or disgust.

reasons pitch perfect (and pitch perfect 2) is way more important than you think it is

let’s talk about fat amy

  • they addressed and acknowledged she was fat
  • this turned it around and made it clear that to her, her weight was not an issue
  • this put her on equal grounds with every other character
  • she was one of the only characters WITH A LOVE INTEREST
  • this is very rare for ‘fat’ characters, who are usually only there to laugh at and be deemed as unattractive 
  • in pitch perfect 2 her love interest wanted more than just sex but she decided what she wanted their relationship to be
  • this is major
  • having a fat character be seen as sexually attractive is not a common thing
  • but hopefully pitch perfect will begin to break the barriers between fat characters and (sexually) attractive characters

whenever i see a beautiful fat person on the metro, i fantasize about just going up to them and giving them a little card that says something like 

‘hey there, i hope i’m not intruding on your day. i just wanted to tell you i think you’re sexy as hell. just thought i’d let you know! hope you have a great day, and that this made your day even better!‘ 

no contact # or anything, just walk away (unless they chase me) 

however i worry that if i did that, i’d make people aggravated at being objectified, or that i’d get a lot of ‘ugh chubby chaser’ or something 

i’m  hoping to a) validate and reveal myself to other feedists with this scheme… and b) potentially raise visibility for body positivity / make fat people who feel ugly feel nice.

how do you think non-feedist/FA ppl would respond to this? positive or not so much? 

—- —- —- 

Mod Note: I think, traditionally, commenting on someone’s appearance–especially if you do not know them–is a bad idea. I had a best friend in 9th grade who got super fat that year. Turns out, it was a tumor.  If you’d told her she looked “sexy as hell” you very likely would have made her cry. She didn’t have anything against fat or fat people–being my best friend and also friends with the only other fat girl in the school, yeah, she was good with it. She would have cried because it would have reminded her just how serious it all was.

If I can give any advice about this, I’d say compliment people you don’t know  directly, and not on their body. Compliment them on something they did, something they can and have changed.  You want to compliment them, do it by complimenting what they’ve done. Even if it is that they picked out a shirt that brings out their eyes. You can still compliment them for looking nice, but you’d be doing it by complimenting an action they undertook specifically.

MMFD Series 3 Episode 1 Review

Okay so I was going to post this earlier but as the episode hadn’t premiered on TV yet,I didn’t want to be at risk of spoiling anyone. So much stuff went down in this episode so I need someway to organize my thoughts.

-Rae’s rant to the interviewers made me laugh. “Shakespeare sure as shit doesn’t get his round in. At least not my local” Her sass just always kills me.

-Baby Bouchtat is adorable! Although I am a bit peeved that we still don’t know her actual name. 

-The Rae/Finn scene in bed killed me. It’s so refreshing to have a show that actually allows a fat girl to be sexual. And to have a guy sexually desire her without it being fetishized or made to be a joke. Although really I find it kind of hard to believe that Finn waited that long into their relationship to tell her he loved her. Come on George Kay. 

-So is Kester leaving? Just the thought of that stressed me out big time. I guess we’ll find out soon. If he is,I don’t know why he can’t just be straight up with Rae and tell her but I guess he knows she has a lot going on and he doesn’t want to stress her out more?

-I loved Karim’s speech to Rae and him giving her the chain. So sweet.

-The penis confetti was just too funny. I died laughing.

-Archie in the record store was just so awkwardly hilarious.

-Rae’s outfits are so on point this series. I’m kind of obsessed with that plaid skirt number.

-From what we’ve seen so far,I actually like Katie. Hope it stays that way.

-I cringed majorly when Rae snapped at Chloe in the pub.

-The whole Rae/Finn “break” conversation was just so emotional. Rae hurting herself afterwards was so hard to watch. 

-LOVED Danny working at the pub and being a part of the gang. His lines were so funny and he was just such a bright spot. 

-Although the scene with Rae seeing Archie and Rob was funny,I’m kind of disappointed with Archie’s storyline. I wanted him to have an actual love interest and not just a hook up buddy. 

-The last scene was so shocking and emotional. From Chloe noticing the bruising on Rae’s knuckles to the crash itself and seeing the rest of the gang in the aftermath. The song choice was also perfect.

Final Thoughts: My opinion after seeing the episode a second time is a lot more positive. Maybe cause I’ve had a chance to process it again? Although there was a couple of things I didn’t like,it was still very well done. 

anonymous asked:

(as a certified Ace (c) person, i can tell w 100% certainty that you can be ace/on the ace spectrum and still have a sex drive!)

ye i figure its just like romantic v sexual attractions and different stances and titles and gahhh idk what the heck i am yknow?? this shit is confusing

It’s hilarious looking through my old art in order: you can always tell when I’ve heard about/seen fatphobic bullshit being spread around and/or heralded as great content, because there will be a huge upsurgence of me positively sexualizing fat bodies

anonymous asked:

all of them ya dipstick

  • 1: Name Eric
  • 2: Age 17
  • 3: 3 Fears embarrassment, wasting my time, not being happy
  • 4: 3 things I love cats, cookies, long hugs
  • 5: 4 turns on neck kissing, smiling?, eagerness I suppose?
  • 6: 4 turns off  being an awful person, I mean I don’t really know, but that covers a lot.
  • 7: My best friend Slippers, my cat.  She is very fat
  • 8: Sexual orientation straight
  • 9: My best first date Got ice cream, cleaned off bird poop from her
  • 10: How tall am I 6ft
  • 11: What do I miss the blissful ignorance of childhood
  • 12: What time were I born ~10:45am
  • 13: Favorite color blue
  • 14: Do I have a crush …I mean yeah?
  • 15: Favorite quote See now this is awkward, the one thing someone said that stuck with me the most…I don’t even remember what it was, I just remember it made me feel really good and hopeful and shit…and this was like last weekend…Tape guy was great
  • 16: Favorite place The graveyard behind my dad’s house
  • 17: Favorite food chocolate chip cookies, man
  • 18: Do I use sarcasm no…………..
  • 19: What am I listening to right now My fan :}
  • 20: First thing I notice in new person eye contact?  Seeing as how I’m bad at it, I pay attention to how others act with it
  • 21: Shoe size 12ish…11.5 for converse because they’re weird
  • 22: Eye color brown
  • 23: Hair color dark brown
  • 24: Favorite style of clothing good clothing? Probably black
  • 25: Ever done a prank call? yeah bruh
  • 27: Meaning behind my URL literally none, just two random words
  • 28: Favorite movie Horns
  • 29: Favorite song I guess Sunday Smile - Beirut
  • 30: Favorite band Walk the Moon? Maybe? It keeps changing and I’m not really sure atm
  • 31: How I feel right now I have no idea
  • 32: Someone I love my cat <3
  • 33: My current relationship status In one
  • 34: My relationship with my parents Pretty tight with both,  prefer my mom, but I talk about more personal stuff with my dad…I like his political views more, but I like that my mom isn’t always on the phone and is on time and actually keeps the house clean
  • 35: Favorite holiday any of the ones I get presents on
  • 36: Tattoos and piercing i have none
  • 37: Tattoos and piercing i want none really at the moment
  • 38: The reason I joined Tumblr I’m dead inside
  • 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? I mean I dont hate her, still occasionally confused on her part
  • 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? I get goodnight texts sometimes
  • 41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? yee bruh
  • 42: When did I last hold hands? like almost 6 hours ago
  • 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? 12 years
  • 44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? nope
  • 45: Where am I right now? in bed
  • 46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? The floor, probably. we tight
  • 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? both?
  • 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? my mom, yeah
  • 49: Am I excited for anything? um? summer, I guess
  • 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? I wish… I have trust issues though
  • 51: How often do I wear a fake smile? like every day I guess, in math especially
  • 52: When was the last time I hugged someone? this morning
  • 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? not a fan
  • 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? probably
  • 55: What is something I disliked about today? math
  • 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? someone who gives out free ice cream
  • 57: What do I think about most? wanting to be asleep/ trying not to fall asleep
  • 58: What’s my strangest talent? I can stretch my elbow skin pretty far
  • 59: Do I have any strange phobias? I mean my fear of wasting time is ironic…seeing as how I always procrastinate, but its not really that kind of wasting time I’m worried about
  • 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? both
  • 61: What was the last lie I told? I just went for a walk; stopped in CVS and got some mints
  • 62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? video chatting
  • 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? aliens, yeah. Ghosts, not so much…I mean…idk
  • 64: Do I believe in magic? nah
  • 65: Do I believe in luck?  nah?
  • 66: What’s the weather like right now? pretty sunny
  • 67: What was the last book I’ve read? paper towns…for summer reading
  • 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? not really
  • 69: Do I have any nicknames? I’m not sure
  • 70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? I sprained my wrist this one time
  • 71: Do I spend money or save it? spend :’(
  • 72: Can I touch my nose with my tongue? nope
  • 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? Well there’s a dried up pink flower in a little treasure chest under my night stand
  • 74: Favorite animal? whale
  • 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? Sleeping, but also not?
  • 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? Pendleton, probably
  • 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Sunday Smile…but it also makes me feel not happy somehow…idek why
  • 78: How can you win my heart? Be an absolute cutie and shit on the patriarchy
  • 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? The entire script of Shrek
  • 80: What is my favorite word? pulchritude
  • 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr curradical brahnt-the-ginger-panda coffeeghostss colefountain pipinghotbuffalowings
  • 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? fuck.
  • 83: Do I have any relatives in jail? not that I know of
  • 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? the power to grant my own wishes
  • 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? well this is one of them…………….
  • 86: What is my current desktop picture? Hella Gucc cat coffeeghostss
  • 87: Had sex? yep
  • 88: Bought condoms? yep
  • 89: Gotten pregnant? yep…?
  • 90: Failed a class? nope
  • 91: Kissed a boy? yeah
  • 92: Kissed a girl? yeah
  • 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? yep
  • 94: Had job? this might be a yes in a couple days?
  • 95: Left the house without my wallet? yeah
  • 96: Bullied someone on the internet? ew no
  • 97: Had sex in public? nah, man
  • 98: Played on a sports team? ew, yeah
  • 99: Smoked weed? nope
  • 100: Did drugs? nope
  • 101: Smoked cigarettes? ew no
  • 102: Drank alcohol? nah
  • 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? nope
  • 104: Been overweight? nope
  • 105: Been underweight? nope
  • 106: Been to a wedding? yeahh
  • 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? duh
  • 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? of course
  • 109: Been outside my home country? nah
  • 110: Gotten my heart broken? yep
  • 111: Been to a professional sports game? yeah
  • 112: Broken a bone? nope
  • 113: Cut myself? no
  • 114: Been to prom? yeah
  • 115: Been in airplane? yep
  • 116: Fly by helicopter? nope
  • 117: What concerts have I been to? Bastille, Lorde, Lady Gaga, Boston calling (twice), Marianas trench
  • 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? nah…like not exactly
  • 119: Learned another language? I took french that one time…and I know the Greek alphabet, but nah
  • 120: Wore make up? yep
  • 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? yeh
  • 122: Had oral sex? yee
  • 123: Dyed my hair? not permanent, so no
  • 124: Voted in a presidential election? nop
  • 125: Rode in an ambulance? I dont think so
  • 126: Had a surgery? yes
  • 127: Met someone famous? no?
  • 128: Stalked someone on a social network? nope
  • 129: Peed outside? yep
  • 130: Been fishing? yep
  • 131: Helped with charity? I dont know
  • 132: Been rejected by a crush? yep
  • 133: Broken a mirror? nope
  • 134: What do I want for birthday? eternal happiness

So yeah, do with that information what you will, anon…ya dipstick

The handsome and beautiful men on tumblur.

I have been on sites and never have ever seen more sexy sexually expressive, fat ass big dick men until my sexy man shared this with me.  I have always said that sexiest man is a man that knows himself, his self worth and that he alone with guidance and lots of wisdom can come to a place were life is the journey.  

Now to keep it short.  Sexy is a BIG part of it.  Get yours cause trust me I’m going get mine and maybe you if you come to Bmore.


Thank you


Rimshotme

I like my belly today.

I will probably hate it today too, but right now, just waking up, I’m enjoying the soft touch and billowy contours. 

Fat feels pleasant to me; I don’t find it disgusting or disturbing. In a vacuum, I think I really like fat, both sexually and just in a “pleasant to touch” way. It’s just the socialized stuff that throws me. All the negative messages I’ve heard all my life. You’re not supposed to like fat. 

My mind immediately begins grasping at thoughts like “most people would find it gross”. Why is that? Why can’t I have a soothing moment when I really like my tubby tummy? 

What is it that makes us not only feel, but seek negative thoughts about our bodies? It must be something about being a Good Woman. 

Well, screw that. Right now, I’m liking this. 

*jiggles belly gleefully*

IF YOU WANNA BE PART OF MY FEMINIST ART PROJECT ABOUT FAT-SHAMING, RACE, GENDER, SEXUAL ORIENTATION [LGBTQ+], TRANSGENDER RIGHTS, WOMANHOOD, SEXUAL FLUIDITY, AND GET HOT PICS TAKEN OF YOU LIKE THIS POST