fat and the furious

Heart Breaker Burger. Bun aux sésamours perdus. Cœurs d'artichauts. Cupithon cru mariné au Saint-Valenthym. Cœur fendu de laitue. Tomate cœur de meuf. Vinaigrette au miel citrompée au cocumin. Moutarde seule qui maille. Barbapapa infidèle.

#burcœurbrisé #gouternestpastromper

Kyle & Curvy GF (pre-death)

Request: Head canon of pre death Kyle and him dating a heavier set girl ?? X

—————

  • you met at a football game
  • you dropped your book
  • a sweaty blonde boy grabbed you
  • “hey you forgot this!!”
  • staring into his dark eyes
  • “thank you”
  • he doesn’t say anything just stares
  • you see him again a week later
  • “hi, listen.  life is short and you are very beautiful do you want to maybe go out like.. tonight?”
  • you happily agree
  • you date for a while
  • one night you come home crying
  • “what happened!?”
  • through tears you tell him someone called you fat in a class
  • him being furious
  • “you are perfect”
  • kissing you
  • EVERYWHERE
  • “i love your curves more than anything”
  • squeezing your thighs
  • afterward being even more proud to call you his girlfriend
  • always introducing you as his
  • “my beautiful girlfriend”
  • “this wonderful young woman”
  • at frat parties being all over you
  • running his hands over your hips and down the curve of your spine
  • him making sure you know how intelligent and intriguing you are as well as beautiful
  • “as beautiful as the packaging is, your soul is a glowing angel”

anonymous asked:

listen tho: when yuri arrives, yuuri learns the russian for "idoit," "fat," and "pig" next and viktor is Furious

OMG I CAN IMAGINE VIKTOR BEING SO MAD but instead of chastising Yuri, Viktor decides to be petty af and teaches Yuuri how to insult back, like “Hey Yuri did you reach puberty yet?”

except Yuuri doesn’t know what he is saying to Yurio

hilarity ensues

Fat & Furious is coming back tomorrow with a burger from the future past. #backtotheburger

Back To The Burger. Nobody calls me fried chicken. Calamarty McFly. Doc Hash Brown. Flying Goudalorean. Tomathover Board. Lime machine. Heinzstein Ketchup. 88 lettuce slice per hour. Pepper Powder Of Love.

Things I want to see in H50 Season Six
  • more “Book ‘em, Danno”s (were there any in S5?!) 
  • more “babe” moments (because duhh)
  • nicknames (”Pac-Man in cargo pants” is one of my favs) 
  • Danny griping at Steve’s crazy SuperSEAL stunts (”what the HELL is the matter with you?!?!”) 
  • a glimpse into Steve’s life as a SEAL orrrr…
  • an ep where Steve is recalled from the reserves (let’s mix it up a bit, eh?) 
  • Danny and Steve taking a trip to New Jersey (alksdjf;laksdjf)
  • more McDanno moments (hellooo)
  • and an excessive amount of bantering and carguments 
  • telepathic conversations and sassy glances
  • some good, SOLID character development and expansion 
  • as well as some new, in depth drama for Steve and Kono 
  • a (extremely delayed) follow up on the whole Wo Fat thing, and the emotional repercussions for Steve (so furious over how the writers totally dropped the ball on that.) 
  • adding more to the Doris McGarrett storyline, and her relationship with Wo Fat 
  • Wo Fat’s father? they could do some good, solid drama between him and Steve / Doris. (after all, Steve did kill his son, and Doris killed his wife. um. yeah.)
  • the PTSD storyline we were promised in season 5 (which never happened) 
  • more focus on the lives of the character, less focus on the case unless it revolves around the characters 

because, let’s be honest. season 5 was sadly lacking in any real, solid McDanno bromance, ohana moments, or any real character development or growth, with the exception of a few episodes. (it seems like the episodes where either really, really good, or very flat.)

what about you all? what do you want to see in S6? (besides McDanno becoming canon, which, realistically, isn’t ever going to happen.) maybe we can throw some of these ideas at the writers. let’s take them back to seasons 1 and 2 (and even 3 and parts of 4) and remind them of what made this show so fantastic; so unique, and unusual and gripping and hilarious. because if season 6 is as dry as season 5 was, it might just be the end of this show. 

On Montparnasse and Cosette

The first grisette who had said to him: “You are handsome!” had cast the stain of darkness into his heart, and had made a Cain of this Abel. Finding that he was handsome, he desired to be elegant: now, the height of elegance is idleness; idleness in a poor man means crime.

Cain was the older son of Adam and Eve, and Abel the younger. Cain cultivated the land, and Abel herded livestock. When Cain sacrificed his crops to the Lord, Abel also sacrificed his livestock – the firstborn of his flock and their fat portions. The Lord favored Abel’s offering. Cain, furious, led Abel into a field and killed Abel.

From an immediate perspective, it is not clear why a grisette saying to Montparnasse: “You are handsome!” would make a Cain out of Montparnasse. Cain had not received favorable judgment, and had killed his brother out of anger, self-righteousness, and jealousy. Here, a grisette had passed favorable judgment on Montparnasse! He should be pleased.

But because the grisette had passed favorable judgment on him, he had wanted to become more of it. Abel was sacrificial without knowing, and this was his virtue. Cain knew and wanted to be seen as sacrificial. This was his vice. With the grisette’s oracle, Montparnasse knew and wanted to maintain that he was beautiful and moreso, elegant. But idleness in a poor man means crime. 

Cosette, too, had learned she was “pretty, but badly dressed.” Therefore, she shunned the merino, shed the mad dog hat, and bought a whole new set of fashions. Finding that she was beautiful, she desired to be fashionable. She, too, sought that reward. She asked her father what he thought of her new fashions, and had a sudden fascination with the outside – what is the purpose of having a pretty face and dress if you do not show them off?

In Cosette, though, these things are not negative. She does not become a Cain. Instead, Hugo tells us that the “entire feminine soul blossomed in her.” These things are positive, and that it is positive is because Cosette can afford it. Idleness in a rich woman means femininity. 

To be fair, had Cosette remained poor, I don’t think that Cosette would have been as obsessed with obtaining the most recent fashions as Montparnasse is. Montparnasse seems to experience it as a narcissistic injury – whatever the cost, he has to match up to this newfound image. But the effects of that would have been lessened if he had money and I believe that Hugo draws these parallels to make clear the various effects of poverty on his characters. 

tl;dr: moar montparnasse and cosette hcs pl0x

Furious women seeking bread cried loudly, the crowd grew, the threats were increasing, and the situation was becoming increasingly critical. One of these women, monstrously large, stood out in the middle, the most excited by her actions and by her strong words:  she was without a doubt someone notable in the halls.

—Nothing but a bunch of épauletiers, she cried, threatening and attacking the general and his officers, make fun of us, so while they eat and fatten themselves, they remain strong while the poor people die of hunger!

Napoleon turned to her and replied with a smile:

—My good woman, look well at me, and tell me who is the most plump of us?

That time Napoleon stopped a furious mob by calling a woman fat.

Mom: i look so fat in this

Me: [internally] yes you look fat and beautiful!!! Fat does not mean ugly and i really wish you’d learn that. But if i tell you yes then you’ll be furious because you equate fat to unattractive. However i refuse to give in to your societally molded view of chubbiness by assuring you you look skinny. I cannot help here.