Area Man Reports to Training Camp for Upcoming Fantasy Football Season

PHILADELPHIA - Area man Brett Kepler, 29, reported to his living-room-based training camp Sunday afternoon to begin practicing for the upcoming fantasy football season. The runner-up in last year’s ‘Fuck the Patriots’ league sat down on a beer stained couch and proceeded to complete several mock drafts on his laptop while watching SportsCenter on ESPN. “The game is just as physical as it is mental,” Kepler told reporters, icing his sore right hand from constant mouse-clicking drills and eating nachos with his left hand, trying to decide if he should update his team’s name from ‘EaglesFan69’ to something more befitting of the league’s trash-talking policies, such as ‘Eric’s Team Sucks’ or ‘Eric Is Super Gay’. “Reading all of the expert rankings, reviewing stats, texting Eric to say that he’s a fucking dick for drafting Andrew Luck last year when he knew that’s who I was going to draft and he just drafted him out of spite- it’s hard work being a professional fantasy football player.” At press time, Kepler threw his phone on the ground after receiving a text picture of league champion Eric Schmidt’s balls.

KICKOFF COVERAGE FANTASY UPDATE- I’m with you, I’d much rather be watching NFL Football than talking about it but in the mean time lets take a look at the top 10 fantasy WR’s as ranked by’s Michael Fabiano. 

1. Calvin Johnson
2. A.J. Green
3. Brandon Marshall
4. Dez Bryant
5. Julio Jones
6. Demaryius Thomas
7. Percy Harvin
8. Andre Johnson
9. Larry Fitzgerald
10. Randall Cobb

Right away I see some big names not in the top 10 and a surprise or two also. Personally I see Fitzgerald a little higher with the addition of Carson Palmer and if the O-line can hold up it’s end of the bargain. I’m not quite as confident about Harvin and Cobb being ranked so high. What’s your take? Is there someone not on the list that should be? Would you rank someone on the list higher or lower? (Photo: Zimbio)

Submitted By Curtis Strong

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Fantasy Football 2012-Way-Too-Early Rankings: Top-11-20 Running backs

Here is the continuation from my top-10 halfbacks list! This may be the worst overall group of running backs that I’ve seen since I started playing fantasy football in 2006.  But you will find no better rankings than the one I have below:

Fifth Tier

11. DeMarco Murray - When the rookie Murray was healthy last, boy did he shine.  There is no doubt he is the real deal, especially after his 253 yard rushing game against the Rams.  If he can keep himself from getting hurt in 2012, Murray could be a top-5 halfback.

12. Ahmad Bradshaw - Brandon Jacobs is across the country with the 49ers, and Bradshaw should have the majority of carries to himself.

13. Adrian Peterson - If Peterson has recovered as well as he says he has from his ACL tear, getting him this low could be a steal. However, there is no certainty he will not miss up to the first six games of the season as of right now.

Sixth Tier

14. Trent Richardson - Supposedly, he is the most NFL ready rookie since the guy mentioned above.  I am willing to take a gamble on him this high because the Browns don’t have anybody else to give the pigskin.

15. Matt Forte - Don’t expect to see Forte here on this list in the middle of August. Forte will either sign a deal with the Bears soon and be a top-10 halfback or sit out training camp and go out of the top-15.

16. Jamaal Charles - He’s coming off an ACL tear and the Chiefs signed Peyton Hillis in the offseason. Yet, Charles has the potential to rush for 1,500 yards.

Seventh Tier

17. BenJarvus Green-Ellis - I was never much of a fan of Green-Ellis when he was with the Patriots. Now, he will still be on a playoff bound team, and also be a work horse in the Bengals backfield.  This could change if the Bengals decide to resign Cedric Benson, but Green-Ellis’ 2012 fantasy prospects look good for now.

18. Shonn Greene - I believe that Greene is better than his fantasy point total last year.  He had a 4.2 YPC throughout the year. From 41 carries within the red zone, Greene only scored 5 touchdowns. His luck should even out in 2012.

19. Darren Sproles - I don’t trust any of the Saints running backs. Yet, if I had to take one for my fantasy team, I’d go with the guy that will be on the field the most when the Saints are losing.  Although I think his 7 receiving touchdowns and 710 last season will be incredibly difficult to replicate, he is a solid low-end number two running back.

20. Michael Bush - Even if Matt Forte signs a contract extension with the Bears, Bush will be a top-25 running back. He totaled 170 fantasy points while only starting 9 games for the Raiders.

Come back next week to check-out my top-21-30 halfbacks!  Comment below or tweet me @davejhansen to let me know what you think.

Free at last. Free at last. Thank god almighty, he’s free at last!

After what seemed like it was to become a neverending ordeal, Deflategate is finally over.

U.S. district court judge Richard Berman has nullified the ridiculous four-game suspension levied against Patriots quarterback Tom Brady by increasingly cartoonish NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.

Adjust your fantasy football rankings accordingly. Brady should immediately be elevated into the Top 6 at the QB position.