The image refuses to leave my brain, so I must once again inflict it on you all.
Canvas fanny packs, faux-leather, horrible 90s neon. ALL the Fanny Packs, worn by giant wolf monsters. Dire Wolf Beasts the size of motocycles with sparkly pink glitter fanny packs wrapped around them. Mighty warriors digging through camo-fanny packs for a snack.
I’m supposed to be working on my @hd-fan-fair fic today, but after a deep and meaningful discussion in the @drarrysquad discord room about bum bags / fanny packs (I honestly don’t know which name is funnier), I somehow ended up writing this ridiculous drabble, instead.
Title: Is that a bum bag?
Rating: PG-13 (but should be NC-17, due to the horrifying bum bag)
Word count: ~250
Draco stalked down the stairs as if they were a catwalk and paused on the bottom step. What do you think?” he asked.
Harry stared, lost for words as he took in Draco’s mismatched outfit. He’d never seen Draco in anything other than robes, and he usually looked so … put together. Now, though, he looked so utterly insane that Harry’s eyes couldn’t decide where to start.
There was the brown paisley-print shirt, the bogey-green corduroy trousers, the feathered fedora and then, worst of all…
“Is that a bum bag?” Harry choked.
“Oh, this?” Draco asked, shaking his hips in such a way that the coins inside jingled jubilantly. “I believe so. Isn’t it convenient?”
Harry gaped. “Draco, no—I mean, yes, it’s convenient, but—you can’t go out wearing that!”
Draco frowned. “Why not?”
“Because it’s a bum bag!” Harry hissed.
“But it’s a brilliant idea! My hands are free, my money’s right here, at waist height, and—”
“Draco, no. It’s socially unacceptable!” Harry interrupted, trying and failing to convey the extent of his revulsion to his clueless boyfriend.
“Tsk, what do you know about socially acceptable attire?” Draco scoffed. “I’m wearing it, and you can’t stop me.”
Harry grinned. “Is that a challenge, Malfoy?”
Draco turned and dashed back upstairs, coins clinking with every step, in a bid to escape. Harry scrambled after him, clawing desperately at the clasp of the bum bag. If he had to strip Draco naked to get it off him, so be it.
VANS US OPEN | HOUSE OF VANS WORKSHOP | TUESDAY BASSEN
We’re taking a look back at some of the awesome House of Vans workshops that took place at the Vans US Open of Surfing in Huntington Beach, CA. Artist designer and all around cool cat Tuesday Bassen held an awesome fanny pack workshop–where folks could draw, pin, and accessorize their own House of Vans fanny pack. Check out pics from previous House of Vans workshops at the Vans US Open of Surfing!