Hey fun fact the people 28 and over on this website actually do KNOW that the average age skews much lower so like, reminding us is pretty pointless?
More to the point, as much as you guys are way better at identifying and calling out misogyny than I was at your age, a lot of people are really terrible at picking up on one particular kind of misogyny, and that is the creepy upper age limit for space and existence you’re setting for women in your communities.
This may not be easy to instantly identify because it’s not really ageism across the board, for example, this idea that fandom has an upper age limit is not something that effects a lot of men in fandom. Women, on the other hand, are apparently expected to re-direct their fan obsession, fixation, or hobby to things like crafting, child-rearing, and housekeeping just as soon as they become a mom or reach that “typical mom” age. Adult fangirls are “immature” and “need to grow up,” while adult fanboys are literally just a fact of life, as if we both haven’t always been there.
Whenever you question a woman’s right to this space because of her age or parental status, you are reinforcing a stereotype that has effects that reach beyond that one situation. The expectation, for example, that 40 year old men be catered to when writing comics, but that characters of interest to 40 year old women are obsolete or unprofitable.
When actresses over 30 are written out of their franchises or written exclusively in villain/mother/crone roles, this not only furthers the impression that women over 30 have no interest in these franchises, but actually causes women over 30 to disengage with these franchises as a self fulfilling prophecy. A sudden loss of representation can be a real buzzkill, as many of you already know too well.
Women over 30 are often sexual and a lot of us get fan crushes or thirst at the exact same rate as younger people do, but you’re not going to hear about it because every one of us has been shamed at one point or another for expressing desire for age-appropriate fictional characters that was totally acceptable when we were five years younger. Add to that dissonance the fact that A LOT of you are fixated on and thirsting after characters that are actually closer to OUR age if not our age exactly.
Hell, we transfer directly from EVERYONE wanting to hear about our desires and attractions to people being equally disgusted. This is pretty dissonant on a website stuffed full of explicitly sexual material, and it’s especially difficult and heartbreaking for the 30+ year olds who JUST CAME OUT and get an extra level of taboo on top of what is most likely a heaping dose of internalized homophobia.
And I know it’s coming so I’m just going to head it off at the pass, this OBVIOUSLY does not mean that you need to engage in any overtly sexual topic with an older person if that discomfits you, and it doesn’t even mean you need to INTERACT with us, because well, you don’t HAVE to interact with anyone on this website if you don’t want to.
But realize what you’re doing when your reaction to the desire of a 30 year old woman to a 30 year old fictional character is revulsion or a suggestion that she is over-sharing. Notice your shock when you realize that older women inhabit the fandom and recognize that that shock has nothing to do with those women.
Pay attention to the double standard that allows you to embrace rude bigoted 50 year old male comic creators/collectors and equally feel like there’s something wrong or stunted about a woman into the same things. Think about it because that stuff will sneak up on you, and you are probably pretty sure that you’re not going to turn 28 and magically drop all your interests, because no one should expect you to.
You know what? I really wish people were as hyped about Sonequa Martin-Green being the first Black woman to lead in a Star Trek series as they are about the D*ctor Wh* casting. But then again, most feminists don’t care about non-White women so it’s to be expected that most of you guys don’t care about the fact that she’s making history too. And when you factor in Michelle Yeoh, you get it doubly so. Last time I checked, this is a pretty big deal for the sci-fi genre too.
What’s strange, to me, is people thinking that the D*ctor Wh* casting gives hope to all little girls when we know that’s not true. This issue is just so very layered and complex, but there is something particularly troubling about the fact that people think a White woman should be the symbol all little girls should look up to, regardless of their race. It’s so very arrogant to believe that little non-White girls will be represented by this woman that looks nothing like them. It’s very arrogant to think that little non-White girls should look up to the new Doctor as their new hero, especially knowing this casting is only a win for White women and White women only.
Destroy the idea that Robert would have been a better husband to Lyanna than he was to Cersei. Destroy the idea that Cersei is the reason he was an awful and abusive husband. The abused is not to blame for their own abuse. Putting the responsibility for the abuser’s actions on the abused is actually a tactic used by abusers to justify their actions and to control and subjugate their partners. Do not buy into Robert’s rhetoric because Robert is fundamentally characterized by his inability to bear responsibility for his actions and his tendency to justify his fuckups by putting it on other people.
Destroy the idea that Lyana knew and was absolutely fine with Rhaegar fighting in the name of the mad man who murdered her family, or that she willingly approved of staying in Dorne while he went to war against one of her two surviving brothers and to subjugate the people who rose in defense of the Stark of Winterfell and gave their lives to bring them justice.
Destroy the idea that Elia thought nothing of Rhaegar running with another woman just because she is Dornish or that her potential knowledge of what he planned makes his actions alright or defensible. Destroy the idea that she put his precious prophecy ahead of her own children’s well-being and lives.
Here’s a novel concept: how about we stop woobifying Robert and Rhaegar by scapegoating Cersei, Elia and Lyanna?
internalized misogyny is so weird. even tho i’m a wlw, i find it harder to care about wlw ships than i do mlm ones. maybe it’s because of the relative lack of wlw relationships both in general media and in fandom. maybe it’s because female characters are generally so underdeveloped compared to male characters. maybe it’s because i came of age in fandom spaces, where straight women so often obsess over and fetishize mlm. maybe it’s because i figured out that i’m not straight using mlm fic to help work through my internalized homophobia. i wish that i had been exposed to more healthy wlw relationships from a younger age, and that media and fandom both cared about wlw more.
In case somebody asks you why people ship McHanzo, you can just link them to this post.
1) Their personalities [ie, the rough and tumble, clever charming cowboy and the severe, noble, disciplined, dutiful archer] are extremely shippable (see: Han Solo and Princess Leia for similar personality types). Referred to as the “odd couple” phenomenon by Matthew Mercer, voice actor of Mccree.
1a) Matthew Mercer explaining the McHanzo ship and putting in McHanzo lines during his panels and his on the spot voice acting for Mccree
1b) Ships in which one character is “tsundere” are popular as well; where one is presumably more open than the other, who is more closed off about their feelings, though in the realm of fanwork this is often an inverted trope
2) The east-west symmetry; in which Hanzo represents the [stereo]typical anachronistic eastern warrior where Mccree represents the [stereo]typical western gunslinger (see: the popularity of interracial romances)
2a) Kurosawa Samurai films were inspired by early Hollywood Westerns; later Westerns were inspired by Kurosawa Samurai films. The “love affair” of Samurai and Cowboy films has gone on for decades
3) Visually appealing; both handsome, buff, middle-aged men–a fandom staple. Also both perfectly contrasting each other in color scheme; Mccree = Red (serape, ult), Hanzo = Blue (clothing accents, ult)
4) Interactions in-game: Junkenstein’s revenge in which Hanzo and Mccree share stories and drinks; followup lines referencing the drinks they shared, Mccree complimenting Hanzo on his shots, a recent addition of Mccree following up his drinks with presumably with Hanzo (
“the next one’s on me” )
5) Their similarities in age, personality and backstory; both with criminal pasts they’re trying to make up for. Both are about the same age and have the same background in stealth, assassination, unsavory dealings.Both are skilled fighters and sharpshooters who have dealt with the dark side of the world, who are seemingly unfit to be heroes but also most compelling in their (in Hanzo’s case, presumed) heroism.
5a) Because of their difficult pasts, the idea of them being happy is appealing. More so the idea of them being happy together, because of the appeal of romance to many fans. Which is why domestic headcanons of them are also very popular.
6) The sheer content generated and the popularity of the ship makes it more appealing to ship: the amount of good art, good fanfiction, and positive energy from both creators and many fans makes the ship appealing to those who are new to it.
7) LGBT ships are more common than het ones by virtue of wish fulfillment; because there is an extreme lack of LGBT content, let alone LGBT romance in media, LGBT ships are more popular within fandom. Also, because of the number of women in fandom who are by the numbers, largely straight, male/male pairings are often more popular than female/female pairings, unless the number of female characters is balanced or there are more female characters in a fandom (see: Once Upon a Time), or female personalities are made more compelling in the show (see: Legend of Korra).
Those are the ones I can think of right now, but there are likely a ton more reasons people ship McHanzo, and I hope people continue to enjoy the Overwatch fandom because all this creativity is amazing. Please do click through the links of the posted photos to reblog the original posts and support the artists!
If it wasn’t so annoying, it’d almost be funny that so many white women in fandom who think that fandom isn’t/shouldn’t be a safe space demand that it become one FOR THEM the second that people of color question or critique their fanworks or shipping practices.
To all the butt-hurt men complaining about an all-female cast for Ocean’s 8: You have never had to grow up watching people of your own gender being objectified or being portrayed as weak and stupid. If you want to watch a movie glorifying and representing men, go back to literally ANY movie ever made, you will find what you are looking for. Women don’t have that luxury. That is why we need change.
Also: Whenever I hear a guy go “Oooh, but women don’t like porn” i think of the enormous amount of porn in fandom created by women for women and all I can think is: “Well, maybe we just don’t like your porn…”