famous words

alright disney,,,,,,if yall are really going on some ‘live action remake of all our old cartoon movies spree’ then listen up,,,,,atlantis. do you hear me?atlantis the lost empire (2001). diverse cast. strong plot. good moral lessons that kids will understand. everything. no more cinderella no more snow white no more sleeping blondie. a t l a n t i s

me a famous actor: you shouldnt use fishbowls. theyre one of the most disgusting abusive bits of “pet care” existing today. pet stores lie to you and sell you a product that WILL cause your fish to poison itself in its own waste so they can guarantee another sale. dont fall for it anymore. buy a tank with a filter and a heater if youre keeping tropical fish, and remember, goldfish should be able to live 20 years in a proper tank.
interviewer: uh ok thanks but i was asking you about your new movie?

people who are photogenic really don’t understand what kind of privilege they have like,,,,,they could literally be scratching their ass and wearing an oversized t-shirt w a mustard stain on it and it still looks like a candid piece of art,,,,meanwhile im dressed to the nines in my best outfit with my hair and makeup done and as soon as someone puts anything close to a camera in front of my face it’s like,,, one of my eye half closes while the other completely dilates. my mouth half opens between a smile and frown (a smown). my head rotates to an unnatural angle that my body doesn’t follow ,,, i lose complete control of my hand and make a peace sign,,,,,,Cursed

i love watching the show my cat from hell because 9/10 times it usually features a heterosexual couple fighting over their hellion cat with one partner (usually the guy) saying “i cant stand this cat it needs to leave” while the girl is just like “no we can figure something out” and when jackson galaxy asks them if they would call it quits over the cat the guy is just like “ofc not she would always choose me over the cat” but if you zoom in on the girls face when he says that you know,,,,,you know,,,,,who will be leaving,,,,,,,,that house first

Context: Our DM is known for loving to ambush his party.  Naturally, starting off this campaign in a tavern, we were all kind of nervous on what plot hook he’d give us.

DM: “(Fighter), you feel someone tapping your shoulder.  Roll perception.

*fighter rolls low*

DM: “You hear the rustle of silk and the clink of steel from behind you.”

Fighter: “I whirl around, draw my sword, and slice off the person’s head.”

*Dead silence.  The DM stares, checks his notes, and sighs.*

DM: “Are you sure?”

Fighter: “Yep.” *succeeds the roll*

DM, giving the fighter a stink-eye: “Your sword passes cleanly through the neck of your target.  As her head spins away from her pink gown-clad body, you see the clear glint of a tiara even in the dim light of the tavern.  Congratulations.  You just murdered this kingdom’s princess.  All of you are now in a fight with about twenty-five guards.”

so today a public health official guy came into my class to give a lecture on disaster awareness and he was talking about house fires and mentioned that the reason people most likely die during a house fire is because they refuse to leave their pet inside or they go back to get their pet. and right when he said this my friend immediately turned his head and looked at me and in that moment I had the most complete and genuine acceptance take over my body. I would 100% in front of my family and Jesus himself walk straight back into some raging inferno that was once my house to go get my fat cat. I nodded back

everyone always talks about how great zuko’s redemption arc was in atla but tbh i’m really disappointed that no one ever mentions how azula had without a doubt the most epic and realistic downfall of any antagonist in any fictional work i’ve ever seen. like years later i am still completely shook

There’s an EXO book. So to write in it, what do we need? We need a pen right? That pen is EXO-L. It’s only when we meet with you we are able to write history. Without you, we are unable to continue writing history. And if EXO book disappears, the pen will become obsolete right? In order to prevent that from happening, let’s run forward together!
—  Byun Baekhyun || 170528 Exordium’dot