Can you explain what the split attraction model is and why people hate it?
The split attraction model is something that originated within the asexual community.
When the community was first getting traction in (somewhat) mainstream discourse the general conception of asexual people were those who were entirely uninterested in relationships with other people– they had no desire to have sex, to commit to anyone romantically, they just wanted to live their lives without people thinking they were broken for not wanting relationships. And they also wanted recognition that it was alienating to have those intimate relationships be the foundation of family structure, of every fictional narrative, in advertisement, of life expectations, etc.
However, that experience did not match some folks who otherwise identified with asexual identity. So the split attraction model was created to describe the experiences of asexual people who still did want relationships with people, they just didn’t want sex to be a part of them. They didn’t want their relationships to have that expected sexual component, but they still fell in love!
So they created the split attraction model of orientation in which attraction was divided into sexual attraction and romantic attraction. So if someone identified with asexual experience but fell in love with folks, they could identify as “asexual heteromantic” for example. Once this model was constructed in the asexual community, this led to the creation of the “aro” identity in (somewhat) mainstream discourse. The aro identity became used by those who did not identify as asexual, but didn’t feel that they experienced romantic attraction. These two identities became interrelated in the same community because of their shared use of the split attraction model to describe their identities.
Once the split attraction model gained traction, the original identity of “asexual” to mean “not interested in relationships at all” became “aroace”/ “aromantic asexual” because asexual no longer meant what they intended to convey.
Then “demi” and “gray” modifiers were introduced to describe those who identified with aro and/or ace identity, but placed this on a spectrum where some level of sexual attraction and/or romantic attraction was experienced, but extremely infrequently, or for folks who thought it might be possible for them, but only in theory.
(However, those modifiers soon came to be used by folks who experience pretty regular attraction– which doesn’t necessarily invalidate the existence of the terms, but is problematic and harmful to others because it creates the impression that those who don’t identify with them inherently have more sexual desire/ more frequent sexual desire, which when applied to marginalized orientations, plays into prejudices against LGBT people about us being sex-obsessed or sexual predators)
Then came the gradual push to apply the split attraction model to non aro/ace identities. This created pressure for LGBT people to separate out their attraction into sexual attraction and romantic attraction– despite that model not being an accurate one to describe the experience of most of us. For most folks outside the ace/aro community, we don’t experience attraction as distinct facets of desire– there is just attraction. We might be attracted to folks infrequently or have less interest in sex and/or romance, but that doesn’t have any meaningful significance in how we understand our orientations.
And pushing this model onto LGB+ identities also created the implication that when we talked about “sexual orientation” we were talking about who we were sexually attracted to, which isn’t what that word means in an LGBT context. Instead it refers to the sex/gender of those we’re attracted to. It doesn’t describe how we’re attracted, it describes who we’re attracted to. This also contributed to the cultural homophobia (and transphobia in a lot of cases) of making our identities out to be inherently (and exclusively) sexual.
There was also a push for LGBT ace people and aro people to use the split attraction model, and this isn’t necessarily bad– some folks do prefer this– but it also prioritizes ace/aro identity over LGBT identity which is problematic for a lot of folks because it creates a barrier between (for example) bi women who identify with the aro/ace community and bi women who don’t by casting them as “asexual biromantic” vs “bi” despite them both being equally bi. It creates some artificial divisions that are harmful for a lot of folks.
So some LGBT ace and aro folks pushed back and began using ace/aro as modifiers as an alternative to the split attraction model. For example, “ace lesbian” rather than “asexual h*m*romantic.” (Which brings me to another problem in that the split attraction model pushed the h*m*sexual slur on gay people who are, understandably, deeply uncomfortable with it.)
While all this was going down, the tension in the overlap between aro/ace and LGBT communities over how to talk about and conceptualize attraction began to bleed into non aro/ace LGBT spaces. Here’s where things really got harmful, because suddenly young gay people with internalized homophobia started being pressured to identify as “h*m*sexual biromantic” or “heterosexual h*m*romantic” or other variations that stunted a huge number of LGBT people in their understandings of themselves and inadvertently validated their self hatred.
There were lesbian survivors struggling with compulsory heterosexuality that were pushed to identify with these long chains of identity modifiers when really they needed to be helped through their psychological trauma and told it was okay to be a lesbian! There were a bunch of us that were locked in the closet and kept from true connection with our communities, and kept from the tools we needed to address our healing, by this model.
So that last development is where a lot of the hostility comes from, but tension has been building for a long while.
Another component that spawned the “ace discourse” as we see it today on tumblr was an instance in which (predominately trans) lesbian survivors were discussing a recent push to have aro/ace identity as an inherent part of LGBT spaces–in the context of not wanting cis “straight aro”/“aromantic heterosexual” men to be in their spaces– which they responded to understandably negatively due to past sexual trauma.
Then that conflict kind of ballooned out of control and everybody started getting hurt in the crossfire, from straight & cis aro/ace folks to LGBT aro/ace folks to non-aro/ace folks all being sent hate mail and threats and being put on different block lists depending on people’s “side” in that discourse.
Then there became a really awful rise in blatant serophobia and homophobia that further alienated LGBT people from aro/ace community discourse. And while all that was going on there was a period of discourse where aro/ace folks started applying an “allo” identity to LGB+ folks without their consent and reinforcing sex-obsessed homophobia as well as suggesting that LGB+ people were privileged for their orientations, which obviously just added insult to injury.
So now here we are. And a lot of (ace/aro and non-ace/aro) LGBT people have a knee-jerk negative reaction to the split attraction model due to their experience with this recent linguistic and cultural history associated with this model.
Deepening Social and Political Conflict in your Fiction
In many speculative fiction works, war or civil unrest is common, sometimes it’s a given. And yet so often, these grand, world-shattering wars are shallow when looked at straight-on. If you think about the history of the conflict or the spark that sent the nations to war, you can come up kind of dry. A lot of readers are tired of “WAR” being the default backdrop of a story, especially when it’s used as a prop rather than handled with the care it should be.
So how do you make sure that your social and political conflicts don’t just provide a canvas to your story, but help deepen and strengthen the world and the characters therein? Simple! Just do a little thinking!
What are they fighting over/why are they fighting?
Misconceptions or misunderstanding
Political or social ideologies
Who is the root of the conflict between?
Nation & Nation
Government & People
Two factions of people
Parts of the same government
Government & Church/Religious group
Church & People
Government & Private institution
Or does it span numerous groups?
How has it spread?
How long has this conflict been going on?
What was the origin point of this disagreement?
How quickly have things escalated?
How has magic or technology figured into the conflict as it is and as it’s developed?
What has motivated the continuation of this fighting?
What level of devastation have the people dealt with?
What is the military structure of the two sides?
How much do your characters know and understand about the history or reasons surrounding the war? How does that influence their feelings toward it?
Are there outside influences that are escalating the situation by getting involved? Perhaps manipulating or aiding one side?
What event triggered the initial conflict? The war (if they’re two separate things)?
Do the people remember what started the war, or has too much time passed?
How has the constant presence of war altered the society and culture?
How much fear is present in the day-to-day life of the citizens?
How do parents handle the knowledge that their children will undoubtedly go off to war at X age?
How has the family structure changed with the constant absence of soldiers?
Does lineage play any part in how likely a child is to be recruited or what level they start at?
How hardened have people come to war and death?
When does soldier training start for children? Is there a gender divide on who fights and who doesn’t? How is “fitness” determined for combat?
Has there been any tries at peace between the warring factions? How were they handled? Why did they fail?
Have art, literature, music etc. survived the enduring war? How has the umbrella of unrest affected the arts?
What do the people believe this war is trying to accomplish? Or do they accept it as a part of life that will likely never go away?
How do people cope with the upheaval of their lives?
How are soldiers selected and trained?
How informed are the general citizens?
How in-danger are the non-combatant people?
Are emotions running rampant, or are they in check? Or is ignorance bliss for most people?
How quickly did the inciting incident lead to the full-on war?
How well- or ill-tempered are the leaders of the sides and how does that contribute to the way the delegations, exchanges, and treaties are handled?
Are the people of the general public on board with going to war, or are they angry about their leaders’ involvement?
How well-documented and reported are the goings-on at the front lines/in governmental offices?
Why are the people unhappy or unsettled?
What groups are trying to resolve the issues or help the needy during the fragile times?
What are the opposing sides/ideas trying to accomplish and how are they balanced over discontentment rather than heading straight to war?
How much pressure is there to start an uprising?
Has the disagreement between some groups brought unity to others?
Is the unrest more mental and political, or are there mobs rioting in the streets?
Are there rumors (true or not) circulating that are adding to the tension?
Is there a press involved? How are their reportings affecting the people? How are they viewed by the ones in power?
How long has this unrest been present? Do people think that it will eventually lead to a revolution or war…or are they just resigned to the way things are?
speaking of my dad’s somewhat disgusting career, my favorite story involving trying to tell people what he does for a living is this one:
I took french in 4th-6th grade, and at some point we were learning words for professions. The teacher had us go around the circle and say what our parents did, and then she’d tell us the word in for that profession in french, and we’d repeat it. Real cutting-edge pedagogical technique, clearly.
So we went around, learning french words for things like “dentist” and “restaurant owner” and “accountant” and “electrician”. Then she got to me.
“Mica, what does your mother do?” she asked, unsuspectingly.
“She makes larger than life, anatomically accurate, fully dissectible models of marine animals for nonprofit educational purposes” I said, giving my very practiced ‘mama’s job spiel’.
My teacher’s face was a study in blank incomprehension.
“Euh.” she said, “And… and what about your father?”
“He installs alternative eco-friendly wastewater treatment systems!” I said, now smiling broadly like the little shit I was.
“……” She was looking distinctly hunted now.
“He used to be a carpenter?” I added, doing what may or may not have been a convincing impression of 'helpful innocence’.
“Ah, charpentier.” she said, grasping the lifeline like a drowning person.
I have never in my life seen a person look more relieved to hear the word carpenter.
saturn is a point of stress in the natal chart; where it is located indicates themes in our life in which seek clarity. we try to perfect this part of our lives & personality, and subsequently have much to learn from saturn’s house placement. this self-imposed pressure can truly crack some.
if your saturn falls in…
your first house, you seek to perfect your image and impression; thus, you may appear quite serious. your worldview is critical and you may find yourself quite skeptical. your perception of the world and others takes time to fully accept.
your second house, your concern is for financial security and a crystal clear set of values. you may accept your morals as an objective view and have troubles relating to others’ values.
your third house, you are careful with your words, and to want to speak with purpose. communication is deeply important to you. may be critical of your education growing up & thus struggled.
your fourth house, your family structure was one you took responsibility for. you may have felt compelled to grow up early to take care of your family. possible critical view of the father or authoritative parent.
your fifth house, uninhibited creativity may be hard to achieve. you may, quite literally, take fun seriously; you seek to perfect technique in your artistic endeavors of choice. may unfairly compare yourself to idols in that vein.
your sixth house, you may feel compelled to take on a lot of responsibilities in work, whether you’re prepared for it or not. may over-exert yourself and this can indicate tendencies of a hypochondriac. you put serious value in hard work.
your seventh house, you find yourself sacrificing in your partnerships. you feel your standards are just and fine, but there is much to learn to benefit from your relationships. you may feel like an old soul without knowing why.
your eighth house, you may feel you understand all there is to know about the world. lessons are needed to embrace the metaphysical that you can be very acute to. may stress & obsess over others’ belongings and values, intimacy, and life changes/mortality.
your ninth house, you may feel a desire to have control over a philosophy or religion of life. may have felt repressed or forced to believe a certain way and this carries confusion into adult life. you fervently seek the truth of any ideology you can get your hands on.
your tenth house, you may stress about your public image and the immense effort you put to making your goals reality. there may be a sensitivity to critique. possibility of taking a long time to cultivate your persona & desired career.
your eleventh house, there is a desire for control of crowds. there are lessons to be learned in this, as well as cultivating empathy for others. may indicate feelings of isolation, ‘alone in a room full of people.’ feeling lack of support.
your twelfth house, your sense of self-control is difficult to actualize. you may feel as though the odds are always stacked against you. may yearn for an overly-structured way of life to compensate for a chaotic inside. may indicate difficulty moving on. may be constantly fearful without understanding the source.
i do love that vm fits nicely into a family structure because they all fill the classic friend group roles
pike: mom friend (very protective, will kick your ass if you pull some dumb shit)
scanlan: dad friend (wants to help you out but has trouble Emotionally Expressing Himself Outside Of Jokes)
vex: big sister friend (you want advice??? wanna talk abt love and sex???? vex is ur girl. she’s also very good at giving advice and not following it herself.)
vax: big brother friend (either gives the Best advice or the Worst advice there’s no in between)
grog: big brother friend (constantly trying to fuck with you but if somebody else tries to he’ll kick their ass)
keyleth: younger sister friend (a lil naive and relies on others to help her understand things but also gets underestimated and treated like a child even though she’s competent in the things she cares about)
percy: younger brother friend (PETTY AF, SPECIFICALLY THAT BRAND OF PETTY THAT ONLY YOUNGER SIBLINGS HAVE, AND TOO CLEVER FOR HIS OWN GOOD)
How do i convince my mom that it would be a better idea to get a pigeon rather than a parrot? Im not good with words :(
I’m honestly not great with them either.
And I can’t make the decision for her if she wants a parrot. Nor should I, really.
But here are the facts.
There is no genuinely domesticated parrot. Most are only about 5 generations from having been taken from the wild.
They are hyperintelligent, high maintainence, powerful birds who can break or sever fingers with a genuinely sereous bite, and are not misbehaving when they screech and bite. They are just being parrots.
The vast majority of parrot species are adapted to large, gregarious flocks, that range for miles and constantly call out to eachother.
Their beaks are made to crush nuts and splinter wood. Even *trying* to be gentle, bites can hurt or injure without the parrot actually meaning for them to.
They have very complex nutritional needs and even more complex needs for enrichment that the vast majority of himan handlers just aren’t prepared for, and bored, isolated, wild birds with beaks made to crush and splinter are just inherantly destructive.
Puberty is a whole other matter! And the hormonal aggression that crops up then for both sexes can potentially make them
The process of taming a parrot requires that it be imprinted on a human so that it doesn’t mistake its handler for a predator and lash out.
Imprinting does not just mark you as Mommy. You also become that birds ideal mate.
Which means that your parrot is likely to attack your significant other to defend its claim of you and try to insist that you maye with it or find dome way to satisfy its sexual urges.
Cuddling and talking just isn’t all there is to taking good care of a parrot. Their needs are incredibly complex and very, very, VERY difficult for the average person to meet.
And if your mom is prepared for that and able to deal with what amounts to an autistic 5 year old with wings who can scream literally as loud as a jet taking off and bite through a broom handle for the next 60-80 years, then awesome!
More parrots deserve a home that’s actually prepared for them!
(Before any one gets concerned, I am autistic! I do not describe parrots this way as an insult. The similarities are just glaring to me, and if the thought of living with an autistic human child is upsetting, you should really rethink getting a parrot.)
But if not, pigeons are amazing at fitting into human families.
Their social structure is very similar to ours, and they have been bred to live alongside humans since stationary settlements became a thing.
Pigeons have very simple physical needs and are content with very simple toys.
They are strict seed eaters that are simple to feed well. And if fed well, their poo is compact, easily cleaned up, and just AMAZING for plants!
A wire dog kennel can easily be modified to be comfortable for an indoor pigeon without breaking the bank.
They are not physically capable of screeching or even breaking the skin. They can tell you off or let you know they aren’t happy without the possibility of injuring you.
They physically can’t destroy furniture or personal belongings.
Pigeons are also incredibly intelligent. They just can’t talk or solve mechanical puzzles.
But they also have the relative cognitive capacity of a 5 year old human and what they *can* do is learn to genuinely understand an awful lot of spoken english!
They can be house trained, leash trained, even trained for assistance. My feral taught himself to be my stress and illness alert bird!
Pigeons fit so well with human families necause are as completely domesticated as dogs and chickens.
Nobody has to steal and bottle raise puppies to be sure they will be tame and safe to handle.
Because domestication is a physiological, genetic change in the brain and body guided by selective breeding, puppies are born docile and friendly and only need to be socialized to stay frirndly.
Same goes for pigeons.
There are TONS of breeds of pigeons! At least as many as there are dog breeds! With everything from intricate lace patterns to fancy bell bottomed feet to feather crests, bonnets, collars, and big, glorous shawls!
Pigeons are quiet, clever, Sky Puppies that make wonderful family members and are DEFINITELY worth consideration as house pets!
Children with the One pattern try hard to be good. They have an unconscious feeling of needing to justify their existence. They became their own disciplinarians and often the discipliner of other siblings.
One or all authority figures are either inadequate, not present, or too demanding and punitive. When the parent is not present, they decide to make their own rules and moral code. When the parent is too punitive, they internalize these rules.
They feel deep guilt, intrinsic inner flaw, and try to cover it up with an identity of being good and responsible. They can perceive others as having less integrity, being lazy and messy.
Children with the Two pattern learn to put other’s needs first - to give in order to receive - and that love must be earned. They try to read the needs in the family and see how they could fulfill them.
They often learn to please the opposite sex parent and this becomes a special relationship, which causes a difficult relationship with the same sex parent. It also leads to a triangulation, which is often carried out in adulthood.
Children with the Three pattern do not feel valued for themselves. They get praise for what they do and become productive to get this praise.
They often unconsciously adapt themselves to become what the nurturer wants them to be. They often pursue a career that may make their nurturer proud of them.
They have a deep feeling of shallowness and deceit, their insides do not match the image they have created.
Children with the Four pattern feel different than their parents. They believe they are not seen by their parents.
There is the feeling that they were kicked out of the nest because there is something tragically wrong with them. Often there is some event that changes the family structure and stands out as the event that changed everything.
Some remember a time when everything was wonderful and a moment when they were rejected for no apparent reason. They spend their childhood trying to regain love by being special.
Children with the Five pattern feel unsafe in their families. They experience their families as intrusive and overwhelming. There is no privacy, no where to hide except in their minds.
They experience the emotional needs and expression of their parents as invasive. Some create an inner fantasy world.
Children with the Six pattern experience their parents as inadequate and unable to protect or care for them well. Early in childhood they feel safe, as they get older something happens that makes them perceive their parents as inadequate.
Usually this occurs during the phase of separating when they need a strong parental figure to show them what is and isn’t safe about the world. At this time they experience parent(s) as inadequate - absent, unavailable, weak, etc.
Children with the Seven pattern feel cut off from the nurturer, causing frustration and anxiety. They feel there was not enough love for them in the family.
Sometimes there is someone needier who requires more attention. Sometimes the nurturer is distracted by emotional pain to give to all the children.
Their role is to be positive, not need much, and help everyone be happier, particularly the nurturer. As adults they often have a close bond with their mothers.
Children with the Eight pattern grow up quickly for a variety of reasons. There is violence in the family or around the family. The protector is missing and they must protect and provide for the family at a young age.
They survive in bad neighborhoods - survival issues are important. It is not safe to be gentle or giving, that seems weak and soft. They feel rejected/betrayed and learn to be tough.
Children with the Nine pattern feel overwhelmed by their families. They try to disappear and/or make peace. They dissociate from drama by becoming invisible or mediating.
They are very low maintenance. They learn that having needs, getting angry, or having difficulties is not acceptable. They lose energy and become listless.
You beautiful soul. Thanks for translating the character sheet. If you haven't done so already could you please translate Goro page?
There was a lot of requests for Goro Akechi.
[…] = my personal comment/note
Gender: Male Height:
178 cm (5’ 10")
64 kg / 141.1 lbs School Year: 3rd year Zodiac:
AB (RH-) Family Structure: None (I live alone in an apartment building in the city)
Habit: I get lost in thoughts in the middle of conversations
Hobby: Bicycling (Ones that make use of easy turning in Tokyo), Bouldering [Rock Climbing], and other fashionable sports like darts.
Food Preference: Nothing in particular. Regarding food, I try out the latest popular dishes as a conversation piece. I don’t mind waiting in long lines for them. I use my hobby of bicycling to go around Tokyo to have a conversation with the adults. Since I have a relationship with adults, I have a reputation among Tokyo’s famous hidden stores and restaurants, but to tell you the truth, I have no interest in the food’s flavor
Ideal Type of Lover: Someone who can keep a sense of distance moderately.
If you won 700 million yen, what would you do? Travel and see the world in favor of broadening my horizons (after the end of my exams)
Message for someone in the phantom thieves: To the Phantom Thief Leader, Your look, your intelligence, your physical ability, I don’t see anything outstanding. But, I wonder why people gather around you…it’s truly interesting.
Capricorn Risings seem to walk around wearing hand-tailored suits. They present themselves resolutely and soberly.
Saturn’s blessings here produce a responsible individual that portrays their individuality through earthly images of stability and security. They’re solid and concrete and actively question everything around them looking for these characteristics in all things, so they’re not very much prone to sudden bursts of fiery excitement. Like a mountain rising quietly between heavy clouds, their presence is solemn, respectful and impactful. They walk generally in a straight line, with a constant rhythm on their heavy feet, close to earth. We can clearly tell they’ve got everything under control.
These people rarely let themselves be affected by external emotional manifestations, as if their body is surrounded by an impenetrable stone barrier. They’ve got clear objectives and ambitions, and this sturdy composition helps them make their way through every challenge and obstacle. They live for this conquest and they’re all about the path they must find to get there. Capricorn Rising’s are usually more mature than others around them and, being children of the lord of time, Saturn’s positioning and conditions is what greatly affects this Ascendant’s characteristics.
Those with Capricorn on the Ascendant may also show a strong and resistant body with remarkable facial traits, for Saturn rules bone structures.
Below, we’ll give only an introductory description of how Saturn manifests in the houses. Because of this planet’s complexity, the descriptions we’ll provide are only superficial. We advise further studies of the chart for “total” understanding of this planet’s position.
Saturn/1st house:on an open battlefield, two armies fight for an old and imposing tower standing at the center; it rains heavily. Being an individual means building one’s own personal value. The identity must be built with strong materials. If Saturn’s in Capricorn, recognition comes through one’s career or professional achievements. If Saturn’s in Aquarius, building an identity comes through one’s ideas and relationship with large groups of people. There’s the need to develop security in one’s self and in one’s existence. Knowing one’s self takes time.
Saturn/2nd house:through its windows, an elegant marble warehouse overflows with vegetables, fruits, leaves, plants and bottles of wine. Maturity comes through one’s developing ability to administer and to organize one’s money and possessions. Dealing responsibly with material matters take time. This is someone who values money and social honour as rewards of hard-work. A stable base come’s through material security.
Saturn/3rd house:an enormous ship fluctuates at the center of a storm; ocean waves rise and crush in the dark without mercy, but the vessel won’t sink. Communicating, producing phrases and being effectively understood takes time and maturity. There’s a need to develop form and structure in one’s ability to communicate, for one’s intense sensitivity typically produces interference in the realm of thoughts. This is someone who will develop maturity the more they interact with other people, specially relatives.
Saturn/4th house:a beautiful summer palace finally rises under the sun, between green fields and small lakes; at last, everything’s getting ready for the noble family’s return. Being recognized by the family is of most importance. Responsibilities and duties are completed to ultimately bring honour to close relatives. Dealing healthily with one’s psychological nature and family structure takes time.
Saturn/5th house:a forgotten imperial palace is restored and opened as a grand history museum; the gardens are preserved as if by magic. The challenge here is to recognize one’s own value, deep meaning and talents. Expressing beautifully one’s own identity through creativity takes time. Artistic careers are favoured later in life. Matters regarding children, games and romance are treated rather seriously.
Saturn/6th house:an old but imposing hospital is the only source of light surrounded by impenetrable darkness. This is someone with a structured routine that portrays themselves as very interested in other’s health conditions and daily habits. There’s the need to develop care with one’s own body and health as well as to learn that not everything ought to achieve one’s perfection standards.
Saturn/7th house:the gardens of an old rich family are reopened as public botanical gardens; fountains gleam under the gentle sunlight. Great sense of responsibility for other people’s well being. One’s identity is linked to their ability to be faithful and loving in their longtime relationships and friendships. Partnerships are solid, serious and formal. There’s the need to develop security in one’s true identity. Marriage may be delayed but stable.
Saturn/8th house:a majestic fortress is surrounded by enormous walls decorated by ivy; no one can see what’s happening inside. Portraits of security and confidence of one’s self, even though, inside, the individual deals daily with all-consuming emotions. Honour and loyalty. This Saturn’s famous for occupying important posts and social positions, mostly dealing with other people’s resources and possessions.
Saturn/9th house:an archaic temple is found at the depths of an ancient city; old words and truths are rediscovered. There may be some difficulty regarding subjects related to religion, sensitivity and ideals. However, utilizing logic and the rational mind is highly favoured. This Saturn’s very disciplined. There’s the need to develop a sincere and solid base for one’s knowledge.
Saturn/10th house:the whole royal palace’s been decorated for the marriage cerimonies; people from all around the world climb up the stairs and into the ball. Polite, beautiful and elegant. Diplomacy is a key characteristic for this Saturn. This is someone who excels at being fair and polite, specially in social situations, being able to dissolve all conflicts. Long-time partnerships are developed in the working realm. This Saturn loves being where he is and is blessing this individual with stability in one’s career, although this can take some time, work and maturity.
Saturn/11th house:built on stone, an old bank stands among taller skyscrapers; it is the richest and most trustworthy institution around. Fantastic apparent ability to observe and extract truth, secrets and details from other people’s lives. Information is analyzed and stored for future use, if needed. This is someone who seems to be able to finally give structure and reasoning to the complexities of the dynamics of groups of people. But, because big groups usually operate through superficiality, this deep and intense individual can find some difficulty in being accepted or finding the ideal group.
Saturn/12th house:a beautiful and isolated cathedral prays by the edges of a cliff; the sea crushes dearly against the structure’s dissolving walls. Projecting one’s identity in the physical world can prove difficult, for Saturn’s structure is being diluted. There’s the need to develop balance and wisdom, projecting one’s identity with ideals and concepts instead. An abstract and sensitive challenge, one could say. Accepting one’s subjectivity and finding one’s own path takes time.
Thank you dearly for reading! I’m hoping it helps.
There are many people in the world, who don’t care about the world, yet they want the world to care about them - don’t be one of these people. Instead live life as selflessly as you can. Don’t allow your life to be directed by other people’s opinions, but do take into consideration how your actions may directly or indirectly affect them. Good people chose the path of goodness, because they have known pain deeply, they have experienced the result of human selfishness. They want to minimise this in the world as much as possible, by having awareness and being conscious of their intentions, motives, flaws, desires, thoughts, emotions, what they do and the things they say. Their life purpose is motivated by the intention to benefit all, to improve something in the world, to give existence a gift only their existence could give.
It doesn’t matter how skilled you are, whether you’re more talented then others, how much money you have, how intelligent you are, how attractive you look, how much attention you get. What truly matters is knowing that your life makes a difference, and being active in making sure the difference you make is true to your soul, that it’s bringing good into this world.
If your life is centred around self-feeding interests, by only personal desires, you’ll fail. You’ll fail 100 times over. Yes you’ll get the fancy car, the flashy career, the superficial power-couple relationship status, the large bank account. But if that’s all ones life has amounted up to, without giving any lasting positive contribution back to the world, you’ve failed. For in the end you’ll realise fulfilment will never be yours. Fulfilment happens only when we devote ourself to something bigger than ourselves, and let our life be example of that loving devotion. We see our intentions manifest tenfold when it comes from a place of love, goodness and truth. If our life isn’t going the way we planned, it’s probably because it’s not in alignment with these three things. Thus life is constantly redirecting us, it’s supporting our souls, but causing anxiety to our mind as we feel opposed.
In order to actually live this philosophy in the practical world, one must constantly centre themselves on what’s important, to be aware of what makes life worth living. They must be conscious of these aspects of their life, and then apply them to the world on a grand scale. If family is important to you, as it brings love and belonging to many of us, how can you make the world more aware of the importance of family? How can we contribute to the social dynamic of family life? How can we help people improve their family life? How can bring meaning into the world through family? The amount of psychological impact the family structure has on an individual is paramount. By improving this, you improve the individual, when the individual improves so does the society, when the society improves the humanity follows.
You don’t need to be a genius to make a unique contribution in the world, you just need to be aware of what humans need, it’s really that simple. And it gets even simpler when you realise you are human; the microcosm reflects the macrocosm and vice versa. Thus just be aware of your own deepest needs; it’s the source of both your happiness and psychological anguish when those needs remained unmet. When you know these within yourself, you know these within the psychological structure of all humans. Contemplate on your internal life, and see how that’s impacted your external life. Then transform the internal, to see transformation in the external, and allow your life through example to transform the lives of others. All great people were great because they set an example, they lead by example. And where someone leads, others follow.
12.12 seriously made me consider making a video essay instead of a written meta because holy fish, the amount of perspective stuff in this episode is nuts. Inconsistency in subjectivity is very normal in media but this episode goes out of its way to establish it, then defies it, then establishes it again.
This episode uses a lot of subjective and objective camera tricks but it can be occasionally difficult to pinpoint the exact rules of what’s through their subjective PoV and what’s the objective camera bias needing to tell the audience things for reasons.
Give me a break here, SPN.
I’m not really gonna talk about the Reservoir Dogs references here. Other people have already done that very well. I’ll be linking to more of other people’s meta throughout, mostly hidden in words. Click on the underlined bits in the post. I’m kind of late to the party on this one. If you wrote something pertaining to what I have here and it’s not linked somewhere, I apologize. I unfortunately don’t see everything or I can’t find it. feel free to add it or message me and I’ll add it directly:
I hope I can explain this in text because it’s not the best medium for what I’ll be saying here. Don’t get me wrong, 12.12 is awesome but because of the nature of its storytelling, it’s weird on a structural front. It’s basically a microcosm of episodes showing the relationship between Cas and his established others.
Below is sort of a break down but I’m going to focus on certain aspects and scenes longer than others.
Aries in the 4th
house: Takes a leadership role in their family despite their status and
age. Being around family can boost their energy. In a negative environment they can feel powerless in their family and unappreciated. They desire a family of liveliness; a connection in spirit, their kin willing to compromise, and passion used to show how deeply everyone cares.
Taurus in the 4th house:Needsa physical place to call home. Security and a comfortable atmosphere are needed in a home. In a negative environment they could feel like they are always searching for a place to call home. They desire a family that has a feeling of loyalty, is typically peaceful, and wants to be the one to provide and comfort.
Gemini in the 4th house: Is prone to moving around a lot and has a hard time connecting with family. The tend to create more solid bonds with family as they get older. In a negative environment they can feel mentally restricted by family and overall disconnected from family bonds. This position desires a family that supports, understands, and respects them. The “family” title is earned not just given by law or blood.
Cancer in the 4th House: Family and home are very important to them. They have a need to settle down and form roots. In a negative environment they could go overboard with trying to protect their family or might feel totally uprooted. They desire a more “traditional” and well structured family and needs kin that they can care for and protect.
Leo in the 4th House: Needs a home and family they can be proud of however misguided shame, reward, and materialism can form from this. In a negative environment they could shun loved ones and attach to other family members or future family for the wrong reasons. They desire to be the star/head of their family. They want a family who is good to them, proud of them, and is always welcoming.
Virgo in the 4th House: Order and structure must exist in their family and home. Watch out for them being too critical of their family members. In a negative environment they could feel forgotten about by family. They desire a family who appreciates their intellect and guidance, a family that has rules and borders but still plenty of love and caring.
Libra in the 4th House: Needs family and home that consist of people who can ground them. They need harmony and a conflict free-zone at home. In a negative environment home and family fuel uncertainty and create too much conflict. They want a family that works together as a team. Kin who accepts each others strengths and weaknesses and pushes to make one another better people.
Scorpio in the 4th House: Is highly protective and loyal to family. They are secretive about family matters to the outside world. In a negative environment they can feel like they have no control over their home and family and feels unprotected. They want a family who will protect them, encourages their growth, has no secrets, and gives to each other.
Sagittarius in the 4th House: Tends to be closer to family when younger then distances when older. They love their family but needs a home where they can breathe and have their own space. They desire a family with close bonds and generosity but also kin with open minds and hearts, who let them be “them”.
Capricorn in the 4th House: Feels responsible for their family despite position and age. Can approach family very traditionally. In a negative environment they can feel like they failed their family or has a lack of control. They desire a family that has a strong foundation, is practical, and serious in decision making.
Aquarius in the 4th House: Moving around is often associated with this position along with an unstable home life. They don’t need a building or one place to call home and can have a hard time connecting with family. In a negative environment they can feel alienated from family or create extreme rebellious tendencies towards family. They want a family that is different and can offer them an interesting life. Maybe they’ll adopt many children, be part of a biker club as their family, or join a commune.
Pisces in the 4th House: Home needs to be a safe place and their family directly impacts their life in all ways. In a negative environment they can feel unstable and unloved and guilt ties into family matters strongly. They desire a family that is compassionate, supportive, stable, and patient.
Can you give some information on Jonghyun and his family and growing up? I've always wondered
these are just some bits of information on his childhood / family. he told a lot of predebut stories when blue night radio was still airing which you can read through at the link!
1) he has one sibling: an older sister named sodam. even though it’s hard to find the original quotation she was apparently born in 1988, making her around two years older than jonghyun and around twenty nine. she was born when their mom was twenty one. she’s a well known shinhwa changjo and has a job working within the cosmetics industry, based on a comment jonghyun made a year or two back but that could’ve changed by now.
2)his mom is named lee eun kyung. she was born on march 1st, 1967 making her fifty years old (in international age). she’s a christian (and sodam seems to be as well, though jonghyun is non-religious). jonghyun has mentioned the many jobs that his mom held in the past in order to keep their family above water, including (but not limited to): selling stickers at a stationary shop and being the principal of a daycare center. she went back to university late in life where she studied both women’s and children’s psychology and now works as a psychosocial therapist.
3) his grandmother was a haenyeo which is a female sea diver that works exclusively within or around jeju island. they’re often referred to as mermaids in korea and prided for being independent / highly determined / having iron and strong will, and are representative of the semi-matriarchal structure of family on jeju island.
5) to give a response about his dad: he’s not really in the picture and, though jonghyun has never confirmed it, it’s very likely that his parents are divorced and have been for awhile now. i once responded to a question about this, but it seems that jonghyun’s relationship with him is either extremely strained or nonexistent. he never mentions him when thanking his family for bringing him up (only his mom and sister). he has never been seen at any shinee or solo related event since debut, etc. any mention of him from jonghyun has been negative, such as: telling a story about how his dad was both against him partaking in a music career and attending a music school, and implying that he was a “bad” guy who dated women far too young for him in regards to his parents’ relationship. so, that’s really all that can be said about him.
1) jonghyun once said that his mom, sister and him used to play harmonica together during their spare time when he was in elementary school.
2) it’s been mentioned on various occasions under different circumstances but he used to practice taekwondo, kendo, etc. during his early childhood. he won a bronze medal in kendo once~.
3) his parents were married in 1994 when his mom was twenty seven, sodam was six and jonghyun was four. jonghyun once mentioned on blue night that, in their wedding video, he can be seen crying throughout the entire ceremony.
5) jonghyun once mentioned that his sister and him lived with his grandparents (on his mom’s side) for two years.
6) jonghyun once said that he doesn’t like thinking back on his childhood. when he was visiting his childhood home back in 2015 for monthly live connection he was quoted as saying: “i don’t want to think back or reminisce about my childhood memories. i have no good memories as i was in a period of storm and stress while living there”. he also said on the show that he doesn’t like looking at childhood pictures for the same reason, but you can view some baby photos of him here.
7) his “first love” was fellow classmate from his first year of elementary school. he basically followed her around like a puppy and wasn’t sure himself if it could be regarded as a “first love” or not.
8) he briefly wanted to be a police officer as a child. he then wanted to become a korean language teacher or writer before turning to music.
9) jonghyun once said that there was a period during his childhood where he was very sick often and it caused his mom a lot of stress. he’s also said that he used to get hurt quite a bit during elementary and middle school.
10) his parents briefly owned a record store very early on during his childhood.
11) he used to dye his fingernails different colors with his sister by using garden balsam as a child.
12) jonghyun attended an all boy’s middle school and then a christian high school named mount zion where he was part of a band named zion where he played the bass. it was through a performance with this band that sm scouted him to audition for the company (based on his visuals). he transferred from this school after becoming a trainee to attend the prestigious seoul music institute which he dropped out of before graduating. he later went on to receive his ged.