fall justin bieber

i’m in my prime,
not withering and old.
but i refuse to play
your wicked games any longer.

i know this tether is unbreakable,
but you make me feel like i’m interchangeable.
you drew a target on my heart,
when did this become fatal attraction?

i don’t have the strength,
the energy,
nor the patience
to be held hostage by your love.

so baby please don’t despair
when i say that
i’ve found the courage to
let you go.

you were never meant to be tied down in the first place.

—  believing i could love you was my mistake, c.j.n.

Find yourself a boy who rubs your legs, even when they’re prickly. Find yourself a boy who plays with you hair, even when there are knots all through it. Find yourself a boy you can binge watch Netflix with, in your underwear, and you haven’t showered since the day before. Date the boy who looks at you at midnight after a McDonald’s run and tells you how beautiful you are and that he can’t fathom why someone as perfect as you would even think about being with someone like him. Date the boy who squeezes your boobs and rubs your butt in the most innocent way possible. 

Date the boy who gives you headaches. The boy who is so damn stubborn it frustrates you sometimes. Date the boy who is damaged because he gave his heart out a little too quickly a few times too many. Date the boy you are terrified to lose, the boy you are terrified to love sometimes. The boy that gives you goosebumps and calms your butterflies all in one moment.

—  Date the boy that makes you so uncomfortably comfortable. 

if people were elements,
then we are ice and fire.

your touch is frost upon my burning skin,
my breath melts your frozen heart.
your kiss is cool against my lips,
and my heat warms you all the way down
to the tips of your toes.

and although we could complement each other,
beckon the other away from the end of polarity
to come and meet in the middle,
too much of one

will eliminate the other.

—  and i’d never forgive myself if i caused your destruction, c.j.n.
Stoned love

Stop messing round with that fire,
Living like love is just a gun for hire,
Cos one moment its just messing round,
To your wiki saying she’s your spouse,
Oh but its not just girls,
Cos yeah one moment I was tearing off her blouse,
Now she says she’s living in my house,

Babe I know you said you’d never smoke pot,
Its just; that burned Like your first splif,
Now we just hanging around in the dark, you’re pale as a ghost.
Stop messing round now, cos am too stoned,
You’re know I can’t save you cos in this game am too gone,

She’s only seventeen, and thinks at sixteen am all there is,
But a degenerate kind, baby am definitely not what you need,
She wants to dance with devil, Mr brownstone is just grave,
Oh Y’know the drugs will drown her out, just too young,
Can’t believe this is my life, smoking and fucking in the back,

3

Title: Let Yourself Fall
Pairing: Dan x reader
Rating: T
Song: Fall by Justin Bieber (aka the beaver, the nickname I gave JB a few years ago)
Word Count: 2,878
Prompt: You have lost trust in falling in love after what happened between you and your ex-boyfriend. Unknown to you, true love is at arm’s length with your best friend Dan.

Request from kiwixcalum513: Hey lovely! If possible could you do a Dan imagine base of the song Fall by Justin Bieber. Thx. p.s. Can we just talk about the new Pokemon Sun and Moon starter Pokemon and that the new region is based in Hawaii, I love it already! Xx

Ah, the Biebs. Long story short, back in middle school and my early high school years, I had mixed emotions geared toward the Biebs. Not that I hate him, but it was hard to be Switzerland between the beliebers and anti-beliebers. But JB’s music these days are great. The song in this request is perfect fanfic material. I wanted to give this song justice, so I wanted to make this longer than my other Dan x reader fics.

As for Sun and Moon… I’m still fangasming. The ”Lit is Litten” joke has gotten to Dan and I’m on the same boat as him. xD Then let’s not forget Phil and Rowlet (let’s see how the grass owl will work for him). Meanwhile, Popplio is for me (I have a soft spot for water types). But seriously, how is it that for a 20th anniversary the Pokemon creators is basing off the new games on my home state? I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited for a Pokemon game than now.

*reins in geeky side* Without further ado, on with the story!

–O— —O— —O—

She is his broken angel. She has the brightest halo he has ever seen and the most graceful wings that has ever touched Dan’s heart. She’s the angel that brings him the greatest joy, but can’t find joy for herself. She’s an impure angel, and it’s all because of him.

Her head is resting on his lap, her tear-streaked cheeks staring blankly at the ceiling. He strokes her (H/C) hair. It has been a few hours since she arrived at his flat and told him that she and Rayce broke up. As soon as he had opened the front door, she had burst into tears and declared “Men are just fucking pigs!”

Dan is trying his best to comfort (Y/N). This isn’t the first time she called him out of the blue to stay over at the flat overnight. It’s what happens whenever she and Rayce fight. Then again, he has always been the person she runs to first whenever anything big happens to her. He’s her anchor, the one that can bring her back to the ground if she’s sinking into a black hole or floating high above the clouds.

“You feeling sleepy yet, (Y/N)?” It’s after midnight. Phil is already asleep, so Dan will have to fill him in the next morning.

(Y/N) blinks, then maneuvers herself off of his lap. She takes out her phone from her pocket to look at the time. “Sort of.”

“You wanna sleep on the sofa or my bed?”

“Either is fine.” When they were younger, she’d sneak over to his house at night and sleep on his bed. When they became adults and they realized other things that can be done on a bed, she’d tend to sleep in the living room.

“I’ll get you a blanket.”

“Thank you.”

He gets up from the couch and heads to his room. He goes to his closet and searches for the (F/C) blanket. Ever since he moved in with Phil in their Manchester apartment, it’s the one she always uses whenever she sleeps over. Once he finds the blanket, he carries it back to the living room, only to find her sleeping peacefully.

He drapes the blanket over her body. The breakup is taking a bigger toll on her than he anticipated. He was never a big fan of Rayce. He may have given (Y/N) his approval on the guy, but that was only because he thought Rayce would be good for her. Dan has been there every time she was on the receiving end of heartbreaks. He had hope Rayce wouldn’t be a douchebag.

He pushes her hair away from her face. He kisses her forehead.

“We’re not all pigs,” he whispers. “I love you more than Rayce ever has.”

~:~

“So I heard the news.”

“What news?”

“(B/F/N) told me Jeremy asked you out.”

“He did.”

“Are you gonna go out with him?”

“I don’t see why not.”

“It’s your first date, (Y/N). Aren’t you nervous?”

“Do I have to be? We’re 12, Dan. Everyone’s going out on dates. There’s no need to make a fuss about it.”

“But first dates are called first dates for a reason. What if something goes bad? You can’t take back a first date.”

“Which is why there’s something called a second date. If things don’t work out in the first date, there’s always another one to make up for it.”

“And what if the guy doesn’t want a second date?”

“Then it’s his loss.”

Jeremy started (Y/N)’s disastrous history of love. When they were 12, Jeremy Harrison took (Y/N) out on her first date. He had a huge crush on her, and Dan had hoped she would like him back. The poor boy was a twat like Dan. A nice twat though, one that’s all heart and flowers. When Dan was 12, his idea of romancing a girl was doing whatever she liked.

The two went to watch a movie. Long story short, Jeremy didn’t do hearts and flowers for one girl at a time. Jeremy had a girlfriend. The only reason why he asked (Y/N) on a date was to make his girlfriend jealous after they had a little fight. Sure, he liked (Y/N), but he settled for less when he thought she wouldn’t be interested in him.

Since the Jeremy failure, (Y/N) no longer went on dates without Dan’s approval.

“I’m not gonna go out with another cheater,” she said a few days after the date. “I don’t have the time to deal with another douchebag.”

Rayce didn’t treat her treat, but he wasn’t the first to do so.

~:~

The next morning, Dan gets up bright and early to cook (Y/N) breakfast. He makes (your favorite kind of breakfast) and prepares a glass of (what you drink in the morning) for her. When he’s finished, he carries it into the lounge, finding her awake and the TV on.

“Good morning, (Y/N).” He hands (Y/N) her breakfast, who takes it from him wordlessly. “How do you feel?”

She shrugs. “Okay.”

“Do you have to leave soon or…?”

“After breakfast. Thank you, by the way.”

He lays a hand on her shoulder. “No problem.”

He doesn’t expect her eyes to go wide at his physical contact. He hears her gasp and immediately scoot her body toward the empty space on the couch.

He notices her reaction and pulls his hand away. “I’m sorry.”

“N-no. I… just don’t touch me.”

“(Y/N)-”

“Don’t.” There’s a fear in her eyes he has never seen before. “Don’t touch me.”

He nods. Pushing the subject further will not produce any answers he seeks.

What has Rayce done to her?

~:~

“You’ve got to be joking.”

“I’m not fooling anyone, Dan.”

“Seriously? Oliver? You’re going to prom with Oliver?”

“Yes… I don’t see what the problem is.”

“There is a problem! It’s Oliver. You’re in year 9 and he’s in year 12. Don’t you think it’s unusual that a god-forsaken football player is asking you to prom?”

“It’s no big deal.”

“It is a big deal! Why would he take you to prom when there are plenty of other girls in year 12 he could ask?”

“Are you telling me I’m not good enough for him?”

“Quite the opposite. He’s not good enough for you. He’s taking advantage of you, angel. He wouldn’t ask you to prom without wanting something from you.”

“Dan, why can’t you expect that there’s a nice guy who wants to ask a nice girl to be his date for prom? He’s not a stranger. He knows me.”

“How much does he know you?”

“Enough that he thought about asking me to prom.”

“You’re insane, (Y/N).”

“On the contrary, your concern is making you the insane one.”

Dan should have done more to convince (Y/N) not to accept Oliver’s prom offer. He and the rest of the year 9 student body knew it wasn’t normal for a year 12 student to take a year 9 student to prom, especially if that year 12 student was a popular football player. Oliver and (Y/N) were in the same journalism class and they did become friends during the school year. But he didn’t understand why Oliver chose (Y/N) out of all people to go to prom with him.

Dan reluctantly allowed her to go to prom with him. It was only for one night. Oliver was graduating anyway.

So when (Y/N), knocks on his door at 10 in the evening on prom night with her mascara ruined, he knew his distrust on Oliver was spot-on.

Oliver was using her. He took her to prom to make his crush jealous. Well, the crush got jealous and Oliver was the idiotic fool to cast (Y/N) in the sidelines and spend the rest of the night with his crush.

“I’m so stupid,” she cried as Dan held her outside on his front porch, not caring about getting the bottom of her dress ruined. “Why did I think Oliver was actually interested in me?”

Seeing (Y/N) get her heart broken for the second time was what made Dan see he had feelings for her.

The second time she got her heart crushed, he realized he was in love with her.

~:~

Dan is unable to stop thinking about (Y/N)’s terrified face. She never reacted that way whenever he touches her. He hugs her and even kisses her cheek and forehead sometimes. He’s used to making physical contact with her. He has no idea why a simple touch on the shoulder would have a big impact on her.

“Give her some space,” Phil offers when Dan tells Phil about (Y/N) and Rayce’s breakup. “Whatever happened between her and Rayce, it’s probably what’s not making her think straight.”

“That’s what I don’t get. Why would she freak out all of a sudden? We’re best friends. We know each other well.”

“I thought I’m your best friend.”

“You’re my guy best friend. (Y/N) is my girl best friend.”

“So a girlfriend.”

“A girl space friend.”

“But you want her to be your girlfriend.”

Dan hesitates. Phil is aware of his feelings for (Y/N) and has persuaded him numerous times to tell her he loves her. But he’s afraid she doesn’t love him the same way he loves her. He doesn’t want to misjudge her feelings for something more beyond friendship. He would rather love her secretly than risk losing her altogether.

“(Y/N) needs time to sort this out,” Phil continues. “She just broke up with her two-year boyfriend. Give her some slack. I’m sure that by the time she moves on, she’ll be back on her feet and you can serenade her any way you wish.”

“I’m not the serenading type.”

“You get what I mean.”

Can Dan wait? Rayce was (Y/N)’s first real boyfriend. Minus their constant fights, she did love him.

If he has to stay away from his broken angel to help her heal, then so be it.

~:~

“Friends with benefit? Are you sure this is safe?”

“We’re using condoms, Dan.”

“I know that. I mean, are you sure you won’t get attached to Sam?”

“Sam’s not my type. And we’re doing this for the pleasure.”

“Ew. Okay. Don’t need to give me those details.”

“Sorry. But I’ll be fine. FWB’s are temporary. Once he gets a girlfriend or I get a boyfriend, we can call it off. Simple as that.”

“(Y/N), have you seen the movies? FWB’s are never simple. One of you two is eventually gonna fall in love with the other.”

“Which is why the Jeremy and Oliver incidents help me remember that love is stupid and I’ll be perfectly okay with being forever alone.”

Sam was the last boy that screwed with (Y/N)’s heart before Rayce came along. She met Sam at during her second year of uni. Sam just broke up with his girlfriend and proposed the FWB plan as his coping mechanism.

Although unsure about the idea of letting (Y/N) use her body that way, he allowed her to go through with the plan. He didn’t dictate her life. If she wanted a man to satisfy her physical cravings, then he’ll let her.

Of course, the FWB lasted long enough for (Y/N) to develop feelings for Sam. As she learned more about Sam’s life, she threw away her opinions about true love and fell for him anyway. She almost told him how she felt, until one day after sex when he told her about a girl he met.

“Laura’s good for him,” she told Dan once she and Sam disbanded from their FWB deal. “I care that he’s happy. What matters is he learned to love again.”

(Y/N) may have saved herself from rejection had she told Sam how she felt, but that didn’t stop her disappointment anyway. She opened her heart. Once you think that you can’t see someone as a mere friend, then you know you have crossed the border between friendship and love.

The period between Sam and Rayce would have been a perfect time for Dan to make his confession. But he held back. He reminded himself of (Y/N)’s disinterest in love.

Just because they are best friends doesn’t mean their history is a sign that they are meant to be together.

~:~

Giving (Y/N) space spans to a few days resisting the temptation to storm her flat.

When Dan doesn’t have YouTube, Radio 1, video games, anime, friends, and Phil to distract him, his mind is drifting to how (Y/N) is doing. He calls to check up on her, but whenever he asks if he can come to see her, she declines.

Is Rayce staying away from her? How is she holding up? Years of nursing through her broken hearts makes him feel strange to experience not seeing her face to face to comfort her. This time, her heart is beyond crushed. It’s shattered.

He wants to see his broken angel. But he respects Phil’s advice.

Phil is right. Maybe time for herself is what she needs.

When she’s ready, he’ll confront her.

~:~

“So you’re going out with Rayce tonight.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Be careful, alright?”

“I can take care of myself. I’m an adult.”

“I mean, be careful with your heart. I don’t want to see another guy break it.”

“Real subtle, Dan.”

“I’m serious.”

“I have pepper spray. If he messes with me, I’ll know how to get away.”

Dan doesn’t want to revisit (Y/N)’s relationship with Rayce.

He’s lucky that Dan hasn’t punched him in the face.

~:~

It has been a little over one week since the breakup. Dan is outside the door to (Y/N)’s flat.

Nine days. He might spontaneously combust if he spends another day without talking to her.

He knocks on the door. He’s holding his breath until she opens the door.

“Hey (Y/N).”

Without saying a word, she slams the door on his face.

He freezes. He didn’t see that coming.

“(Y/N)? Uh… why did you close the door?”

She doesn’t respond.

His worries escalate. What’s going on? He thought she’d be happy to see him. Is she mad he was giving her space?

“Are you okay? I haven’t seen you in a while. I thought we could go out and grab a pizza. My treat.”

The door stays closed. He questions if today wasn’t a good day to catch up with her.

“Ummm… if you don’t want to talk, that’s fine. I’ll just get going.”

He’s about to walk away when he hears the click of the doorknob.

The door opens. (Y/N) gazes up at him with her (E/C) eyes.

“Hi.”

She still doesn’t say anything. Instead, she leaps forward and hugs him.

“Whoa. (Y/N), why are you-”

“Not all men are pigs,” she cuts him off. She cranes her head to look up at him. “Rayce was definitely a pig, which is why we fought over the stupidest things. Hell, most of the things we even fought about was about you.”

“Me?” Dan knew Rayce was jealous by his friendship with (Y/N), but he thought Rayce would eventually get over it. If Rayce wanted to be a good boyfriend, he would accept Dan and (Y/N) are a package deal.

“We broke up because Rayce told me to choose between him and you. If we were going to work, I had to put him first.”

“Oh.” (Y/N) only told him they broke up because of jealousy problems. He had idea there was more to it.

“I couldn’t leave you for him. I can’t imagine living a life without being your friend. These last few days made me see that you mean more to me than my best friend. You’ve been there for me through thick and thin. You’ve seen me at my best and my worst. You pick me up when I fall.” She tiptoes so her face is almost leveled at his. “My walls are down when I’m with you.”

He cradles her face in his hands. “Angel, what are you saying?”

She smiles. The impure angel he has known for years speaks the words he has been dying to hear for a long time.

“I love you.” She laughs. “I love you so fucking much and I don’t think love is stupid.”

“Love isn’t stupid, (Y/N). I love you too.”

With that, he leans down and kisses her. He kisses her roughly and passionately, the kind of kiss filled with the feelings he hid from her. His hands bury in her hair. Her arms grip his shoulder blades. He doesn’t care they are in a hallway and anyone could walk in on them at any moment. This kiss was a long time coming. The world can go screw itself for a few seconds.

“The fanfics are right. You are a great kisser,” she breathes when they break apart.

“Phan or reader insert?”

“Does it matter?”

“I guess not.”

She kisses his cheek. “So how about that pizza?”

“Thought you didn’t want to go.”

She scoffs. “I’m not passing up pizza. I’m caveman hungry.”

He chuckles. This is the (Y/N) he fell in love with. He missed seeing his real best friend for the last several days.

His angel. His almost girlfriend (he’ll ask her the question when they go out for pizza).

She has finally let herself fall.

—O— —O— —O—

I may have overdone this. I put a plot and everything. But this song… damn I couldn’t leave it at 1,000 words. This song deserved a story.

Until next time.

~ AA