fake-but-i-want-it

anonymous asked:

I absolutely favorite of ur fake subs was that single panel of the bts bon voyage where jimin said to rm “you look like my thumb with shades on” and then proceeds to say “oh my gosh I love it tho” I just reread that fake sub when I want to laugh 😆

LMAOO I WAS CACKLING WHILE MAKING THAT ONE im so glad u like it ahahhaa

xdaringdamselx  asked:

So if you could make any of the various in-show talk-shows (like Miz TV or w/e) into a regular recurring standalone thing, which one would it be, and what would you want to see happen on it every week?

I think I would want it to be Miz TV actually! The Miz is just so so good at what he does. It could be just like it is now, but with anyone not just wwe wrestlers. Maryse would need to be there. Miz would be half Actual Good Question Asking Interviewer and half Insults You To Your Face Fake Interviewer. Gah I want him and Maryse to get taken to movie sets for behind the scenes promotional stuff and just be like very rude and unimpressed and funny. When Miz/Maryse needed to take a show off Dean could inexplicably take over the show with his plant friend.

And of course the most important part would remain the same:

10

Dear Great Pumpkin,

I am looking forward to your arrival on Halloween night. I hope you will bring me lots of presents. You must get discouraged because more people believe in Santa Claus more than in you. Well, let’s face it… Santa Claus has had more publicity. But being number two, perhaps you try harder. Everyone tells me you are a fake, but I believe in you.

P.S. If you really are a fake, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.

Future girlfriend..

It bugs me when people promise their girl the world and more every single day. It is impossible and unreasonable for someone to ask you to be 100% all day every day. Whoever my future girlfriend is, yes, I promise to love you with all my heart and take care of you and shower you with affection. But I also can promise you that we will fight, and we will get angry and frustrated with one another. BUT, I can promise to work things through and talk it out and not give up on you. I can’t promise that every day will be cloud nine and sunshines and rainbows and flowers because that’s not real, that’s fake. I want real, I don’t want a fairytale.

GTA AU where Gavin and Ryan don’t know each other but accidently add each other on snapchat and end up in a competition of who can commit the most outrageous crime.

Gavin posts a snap on his story hijacking a truck full of raybans so Ryan one-ups him by posting a picture of himself wearing five Gucci belts next to a delivery truck.

Gavin snaps a picture posing next to a cop he’s handcuffed to his car, so Ryan posts of a picture of the entire LSPD chained to their desks.

Gavin steals a fire truck so Ryan posts a video of the fire station set on fire with his maniacal laughter in the background.

Gavin posts a selfie from the back of a cop car with the crying emoji over his face, and half an hour later Ryan adds a video to his story of him and Gavin driving down Chiliad as a police helicopter circles them.

honestly, the fandom seems spilt on lancelot. one half saying to stop shipping it because its problematic, the other half literally not giving a fuck. im sitting here genuinely curious and interested. im not saying i ship it and i want it to be canon, i think that it has a lot of potential. i mean, anything can happen with lotor’s character.

i want lotor to be evil and manipulative. i want lotor to be genuinely horrible and screw up everything the paladins have worked hard on. i want him to spilt the team up and i want him to get into their minds. i want him to break the characters and push them to their limits. i want him to flush out their traits and have them grow. i want him to be one of the most horrific and well written antagonist of a kid’s cartoon show.

however, in the lance portion of this, i want lance to grow as well. perhaps lotor offers him to join their side as many of the other theories have already said. i want lance to fall prey to lotor’s praise and shower of appreciation. i want lance to know that this is wrong, he shouldnt do this, but he is. i want lance to make the decision to leave the team and join lotor leaving them hurt and broken in his wake. i want to see keith’s heart shatters as lance walks away from the team, away from him.

i want tHE ANGST.

i want lance to secretly be working with allura in a plot to overthrow lotor from the inside. i want lotor and lance dance around each other in a deadly game, neither of them knowing what the other is doing. both of them think the other one has really fallen for them. (maybe even sometimes the line between whats fake and real get blurred…) i want lance to be undercover for months. the team losing complete hope over him after they meet and fight. i want them to fight, and pidge and hunk crying thinking they truly lost lance to the other side. i want keith to watch as lance kisses lotor and being pissed that lance left. that he let him go.

finally, i want lance to show his true colors when the other paladins think they have lost and lotor won. i want lance to turn on lotor the only think between them is his bayard. i want lance to kICK SOME ASS.

and then, after all of that, i want the paladins to bE PISSED THE FUCK OFF THAT LANCE AND ALLURA PLANNED ALL OF THIS SHIT AND MADE THEM THINK LANCE HAD GONE BAD

Non-verbal forms of communication: pet version

I’ve seen a lot of posts about “littles non-verbal forms of communication” and I thought to myself… most pets are non-verbal, but a lot of people (mainly inexperienced owners) don’t know what to do with a pet that’s being non-verbal. So here is a quick post explaining some (not all) forms of non-verbal ways a pet (mostly canine) communicates and what it means.

SOUNDS:

  • murr/purr/low moan: “I am content and comfortable”
  • growl: “I am feeling threatened/scared”
  • yip/mew: “I want attention/I want to play”
  • whine: “Something is wrong”
  • snarl: “I am very angry/get away from me”
  • bark: “I want attention/I am ready for –”
  • questioning murr: “I am confused/I do not know what to do”
  • howl: “I want my presence to be known/I want my pack”
  • roar: “I am feeling – and cannot express my emotions properly”
  • baying: “I am in pursuit of my prey/toy”
  • whimper: “I do not like the situation I am in/how I am being spoken to”
  • fake sneeze: “I want your attention back”
  • snort: “I have an attitude”

ACTIONS:

  • headbutt: “I want attention/pet me/I’m giving you affection”
  • rolling on back/exposing belly: “I feel safe around you”
  • curled up: “I am feeling insecure/anxious”
  • pawing at: “I want attention”
  • sitting and staring at: “I want something”
  • lowering self to floor, butt up: “Let’s play”
  • playful stance: “I want to play”
  • lowering self, curled up slightly: “I feel threatened/get away from me”
  • teeth bared: “I feel threatened/I am angry”
  • flopping over: “I am content”
  • shaking off: “I am trying to relax/settle down”
  • curling up beside someone while touching them: “I want physical contact”
  • nudging under someone’s hand: “Pet me”
  • swatting at: “Don’t touch me/I don’t want –”

[ * This is just a quick post, these are not all of the sounds a non-verbal will make and this is not the case for every single pet; this is more of a rough guideline. ]

GBBO Series 23

Mary: So what did you pick for the technical challenge, Paul?

Paul: I told them to make a Norwegian pastry called “jaevla bakverk.”

Mary: I’ve never heard of that.

Paul: You wouldn’t have, I just made it up off the top of my head. It’s totally fake. I wanted to test whether they can pull off a pastry that doesn’t really exist.

Mary: Did you give them a recipe?

Paul: It just says, “Make 12 jaevla bakverk.”

Mary: You’re a right bastard, Paul.

Paul: Oh yes.

SKAM S04E06 Clip 3 - Fake Fake Fake

EVA: I wanted to write a causerie, but I’m not funny at all. I think it’s really difficult.

NOORA: I don’t even get what a causerie is.

EVA: I was really struggling. It’s like.. It doesn’t even matter whether I have a good day when we have a mock exam. I feel like it’s..

[DIALOGUE FADES OUT]

EVA: Are you joining us? Sana!

SANA: Huh?

EVA: Are you joining us for McDonalds?

SANA: No, I’m reading for my mock exam.

NOORA: Okay. Should we buy you something?

SANA: No, no thanks.

EVA: Yes.. Talk to you later.

NOORA: Bye.

EVA: I’m sooo hungry.

NOORA: Me too!

ISAK: Have Sara stolen your friends or something?

SANA: Huh? No!

ISAK: No? Okay, I’m kidding. Fake, fake, fake, fake. Ugh, girls. Sara doesn’t even like Vilde.

SANA: How do you know?

ISAK: Because she talks shit about her.

SANA: To you?

ISAK: Mhm.

SANA: Are you and Sara friends or something?

ISAK: We were in a relationship.

SANA: That’s true. How could you even stand dating her?

ISAK: No, good question.. It wasn’t a very sexual relationship, to put it that way. We mostly chatted. Looking back on that relationship, I was more of an online therapist than a boyfriend. I would’ve loved some payment for all that time I spent reading shit talk about russ friends and stuff. I couldn’t give more of a fuck. Hey! Sister species are species which are determined morphologically?

SANA: No. Sister species are species which are similar in exterior traits, but which can be completely different genetically.

ISAK: I’m gonna go hang myself.

Jewel In The Crown (M)

florist!kihyun, 15.1k, he knows what beautiful is but he’s also a bit jealous and has shitty friends

warning: smut (kihyun is a virgin, his first time, oral for both, slightly dom!kihyun i guess??)

“You look really nice by the way…Ignore that. You look beautiful. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever known.”

Originally posted by wonhontology

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I'm about to take the "Bi"out of BioWare since that's what they keep doing to their characters.