I know the card symbols on Joker’s arms are tattoos but I’m like 87% sure they’re temporary stick-on ones that he _claims_ are real.
The only person who knows they’re fake is Harley, who vividly remembers the day Joker planned to get them actually done but nearly murdered the tattoo artist when they pulled the needle out for the first time whilst screaming “THEY’RE TRYING TO KILL ME” loud enough for the whole block to hear.
He didn’t /know/.
Hi, can you do a Joker x Reader x Harley? I would appreciate. :)
Oh dear how bad things could feel when I was sick. Everything seemed ten times worse than normally and I hated every bit of it!
My throat was sore as fuck and my head felt like a bomb, ticking every second and the pressure was building up. My muscles ached and overall I felt like a wreck. Harley ,Joker and I were driving around Gotham city two days ago and by the shore I got out of the car. Perfectly I decided to jump down and take a swim. It started raining and everything sucked. Batman came around and I had to swim in the cold sea for longer than expected and I was sneaky enough to get away. But I had to walk home with wet clothes.
Now I had a fever.
‘’Aw poor thing’’ Harley sighed and slid down onto the couch next to me. I was watching tv, a series called ‘Gotham’. So far it was pretty okay. I tilted my head to see my girlfriend in her pink pajamas. Oh did I forget to mention that we were in a poly relationship? It was kinda awesome, at least for us.
‘’Let me take care of ya’’ Harley smiled widely and moved on the couch, standing on her knees. ‘’You’ll catch this’’ I warned her with a hoarse voice. I watched as she rolled her pretty blues and grabbed a pillow. Then she poofed it in her hands. Just then Joker appeared out of nowhere. ‘’How are my two favourite girls?’’ He purred and his red lips curved into a big metallic grin. I opened my mouth to speak, but then I felt like I had to sneeze.
I put my hand in front of my face and then took two deep breaths before sneezing. It made me a little dizzy. ‘’She’s sick’’ Harley told Joker and then put the pillow behind my head. ‘’No shit’’ I whispered playfully and then grabbed a tissue, wiping my hands and nose on it. ‘’Oh Y/N..That leaves us with one thing’’ Joker started and then I noticed he was shirtless. He grabbed a dark grey blanket and put it on me, tucking me in softly. ‘’We’ll have to take care of you. Right Harley?’’ Joker looked at miss madness over here a little darkly.
That look never meant anything good.
‘’Yes Puddin’’ The words left Harley’s mouth slickly. ‘’I don’t want you to to get sick as well’’ I tried to speak without losing my voice. Suddenly Joker just laid down right next to me, wrapping one arm around me. I sighed and tried to ignore that he just couldn’t understand no. I didn’t want him or Harley to get sick because of me.
‘’Don’t worry. We’ll get some medicines for you to pop up and you’ll be good to go’’ He promised cheerfully. Yeah right. Harley snuggled up to me on the other side and put her hand on my stomach, of course on the blanket. ‘’Don’t be so worried Y/N. It’s going to be okay!’’ She purred lovingly and traced patterns with her fingers. Well I warned them.
‘’What’s this show?’’ Harley asked me as we all stared at the big flat screen in front of us. ‘’Gotham’’ I replied shortly and then tried to relax. ‘’Oh how exciting!’’ Joker chuckled and sounded happy. He liked shows that were filmed here or had anything to do with Gotham. ‘’ Hey princess’’ Harley looked at me, straight into my eyes. I just nodded. ‘’I’ll go and getcha some drugs to make you feel better’’ She promised and placed a kiss on my cheeks. Knowing Harley I wasn’t sure whether she meant real drugs or medicines by drugs. Then she got up and walked away, leaving me with Joker.
‘’If I knew how to cook I’d make ya some soup’’ He admitted after a while. I couldn’t help but to smile at him. ‘’I’ll be fine J’’ I whispered calmly and leaned a little against him. ‘’This is Batman’s fault’’ He stated bluntly and I just nodded. ‘’Well we can kick his ass later’’ He laughed again and I knew he’d do anything to piss off that bat. ‘’You, me and Harley. A deadly trio’’ I said although my throat hurt. Joker looked into my eyes and I saw love in the middle of that chaos. ‘’You two are my queens..you’re so clever’’
‘’I’m back!’’ Harley declared and ran over with something in her hands. I looked closer and saw two things which didn’t surprise me at all. She had Burana, water and a joint. A long joint. ‘’I thought we could share this’’ She answered my unspoken question. ‘’Come here Harls. We’ll have to stay in all day’’ Joker fake pouted. Harley was back on the couch with us quickly.
The English language
(because honestly if I could choose between English and my native
language I wouldn’t even have to think about it)
5 things people may not
know about me:
I was younger I was embarrassed to be interested in Spiderman comics
as a girl, so when I bought them I always made sure to also buy some
random girl magazine I didn’t even want, and then spent about
fifteen minutes walking up and down the aisle getting up the nerve
to put that goddamn comic on the counter (I was obviously an idiot?)
room is chaos but it’s organised
chaos, I find my stuff and all, but people keep thinking it’s okay
to just relocate anything anywhere if they think it’s in the way
because after all chaos is chaos, right, which is really annoying to
when I do memes like this I get the impression that I have no
personality at all because it’s absurdly difficult to come up with
things that are not fandom-related
I love dying my hair but the only colour that ever seems to really
stick is blond
I love putting face
paint on me and other people (though I’m not very good at it)
Ok, so Rick and Floyd become friends, right? And one day after a successful mission, Rick says to Floyd, “Nice job out there, Hot Shot.” And Floyd just laughs, but the nickname sticks and Rick takes to calling Floyd “Hot Shot” whenever he can.
So, a month passes, along with another mission. And Rick’s just given Floyd a clap on the shoulder, and surely another Hot Shot is about to come, but before Rick can open his mouth, Floyd says, “Good job today, Pretty Ricky”. And Rick just blinks for a moment before he throws his head back with laughter, hanging on to Floyd’s shoulder for support.
And it becomes they’re thing, Hot Shot and Pretty Ricky. Another few months pass and they become closer, friendly touches lingering just a bit too long, knowing looks from across the room, small smiles only meant for each other. They’re almost sickening in their fondness for each other, but the Squad puts up with it because they’ve never seen Rick and Floyd look so happy.
Eventually, the pet names get kicked up a notch when Rick gets hurt during a mission. He’s nursing a couple of broken ribs when he limps out of his hospital room to the Squad waiting in the hallway.
Floyd is the first one to him, of course. He lays a gentle hand on Rick’s shoulder and says, “Glad you’re alright, Pretty Boy,” small smile on his face. He’s pretty sure Boomerang just fake gagged and Harley cooed, but he can’t find it in himself to care.
Rick smiles, eyes crinkling and teeth flashing as he puts his hand over Floyd’s, where it’s still resting on his shoulder. “Don’t worry,” Rick says, smile widening. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily, Hot Stuff.”
As Floyd surges in, planting a kiss on Rick’s still smiling mouth, the Squad cheers, because finally, they’re friends got their shit together. And if the occasional Pretty Boy or Hot Stuff pet name is heard in the field, no one really minds. (Except maybe Waller, who’s long suffering sigh can be heard over the coms.)