fails as usual

I tried! 

when cutting onions:

-noct cries and complains about the fact that he’s crying
-prompto cries onto the actual onion
-gladio tears up and asks iggy why he’s doing this when literally anyone else could instead
-iggy doesn’t tear up because he’s a fucking beast

5

*sigh* I have. FINISHED.

Today’s prompt for this awesome week is Fusion, so here’s Larimar again 8D !

I slightly changed her palette because I didn’t like the old one. Not big changes, but it’ss till better I guess. And since I was not satisfied with one picture I decided I’d make several shitty doodles because why not - Now, I’m gonna tell you about my stupid headcanons about her ~ (I’ve already talked about some of them, but well.)

  • Larimar likes to tell jokes…and laugh at them. Yes. She likes to laugh at her own jokes. And then she tries to stay serious and usually fails. Yes. She does like fart jokes.
  • Lapis and Peridot’s laughs fused too :^) So as you can see in the last sketch, she snorts, but also have Peridot’s “Nyehehehe !!!” (I’ll never get tired of this laugh)
  • When she feel bad, stressed, or threatened, Peridot’s side will show. It means that she will , by reflex… grab her own arms. And then she’ll tell herself it’s okay. Sometimes she will let go, sometimes not.
  • She’s usually kinda calm. If someones makes her angry, she will *cough* resolves the problem with an authentic Lapis Idon’tgiveashit Lazuli’s face™.
  • Her theme would be electro-swing. Electro because Peridot (I don’t have to explain I think) and swing for Lapis, because well…it fits her personnality tbh (seriously the first Larimar picture I made was while listening to Parov Stellar, Alice Francis and Caravan Palace. So yeah it’s visible on her XD)
  • Something like Alice Francis’ voice. Just…imagine. (Or go listen if you don’t know her because she’s  a m a z i n g)
  • Also she’s a good tapdancer. Just because Shelby said she’d like Peridot to tap dance to fuse. So boom tap dancer Larimar.
  • She loves Steven. Well, like all his family and friends. But I just needed to remind you because
  • If someone touches the child *angry Sr Pelo noises* she turns into the Giant Angry Woman ™. Don’t touch the child.
  • She likes to hug Steven or herself. She’s basically a giant mom/aunt/being that have plenty of love to give.
  • Again, don’t touch the child.


Aaaand I guess that’s all ? I don’t know actually, if you want to ask something go ahead lmao

Also the Larimar + Morganite picture was kinda random first but I found that fun. There was another one, but maybe another day, because now I’m just too lazy to finish it :v

(Also before I forget - boop @lapidot-anniversary-week / @jenhedgehog cuz‘ the tags don’t always work :| )

  • Viktor, at some point: Hey Yakov, I'm thinking about getting a car
  • Yakov:
  • Viktor:
  • Yakov: Viktor, do not buy the p-
  • Viktor: I'm buying the pink Barbie convertible!
  • Yakov:
  • Viktor:
  • Yakov:
  • Yakov: I must have killed someone in a past life to deserve this
Beauty and the Beast Post-Curse headcanons Part 2

So after posting my first installment of post-curse headcanons I realized that I forgot a few characters. Given the positive response to the first post (and a few sleepless hours last night) I have come up with more. I hope you enjoy them.

Maurice
-After the curse is broken, Chip makes a point of apologizing to Maurice for scaring him during his first visit to the castle. Maurice assures Chip that it wasn’t his fault and asks him to give him a tour of the castle. Chip happily agrees and proceeds to lead Maurice on a uniquely childlike tour. Much less (accurate) history of the castle. Way more hide and seek tips. “And what about this portrait here?” “That’s Monsieur Funny hat. I don’t know what his actual name is…but he has a really big funny hat. These curtains make a good hide and seek spot too. But make sure your feet are covered–Hey wanna see the cubboard I used to sleep in?!” Maurice called it the best tour he had ever had.
- Once Belle and Adam become engaged, Maurice offers to paint an engagement portrait of the happy couple. But dispite their best efforts, they have a very hard time working a long formal portrait sitting into their schedules. The sketches from their early attempts all felt a bit stiff. Then one evening Maurice decides to discreetly pull out his easel in the library while Belle and Adam sat curled up together reading, comfortably in their own element, aware only of their books and each other. This stealth portrait allowed Maurice to capture the tender look in Adam’s eyes when he would look over at Belle (a look he attempted to control–and usually failed–when he knew his future father-in-law was looking) and a look of bliss Belle seemed to only have in moments like this. The portrait is so successful, Maurice continues to make these candid portraits for other residents of the castle, capturing their happiest moments to last forever.

Chapeau
- Chapeau is a man of few words. He prefers to quietly observe in social situations, welcome guests with a wordless smile and nod as a greeting, and to play his violin. That said, he knows everything there is to know about the goings on of the castle. Lumière can’t think of what to get Plumette for her birthday? Ask Chapeau. Chip can’t find a toy he misplaced. Ask Chapeau. His answers are brief, but nearly always the perfect solution.

Cadenza and Garderobe
-Cadenza and Garderobe decide they want to try to teach FrouFrou to sing. This proves to be a very loud and comical task. The rest of the castle is not nearly as tickled by FrouFrou’s performance as a vocalist, but it makes Cadenza and Garderobe so happy they all play along.
-Garderobe has been known to dispense unsolicited romantic advice to Plumette and Belle, some of which makes them blush and look for the nearest exit. However, most of her advice really is helpful.
-Cadenza also offers advice, but it is usually related to writing a song in some way or other. It can be hard to tell if he means metaphorically or literally.

Cogsworth
-Cogsworth has developed the uncanny ability of knowing the exact time of day without looking at a clock. Lumière finds this hilarious and tries to prompt him to give the time without him realizing it. Dispite his accuracy as to the particular minute, Cogsworth often forgets what day it is.
-Once Cogsworth hears of the way Clothilde (Mrs. Cogsworth) treated Belle in the village during the curse, he demands she apologize, which she does (perhaps a bit too profusely.) Their reunion is the rockiest of the castle residents, having been a less than stable relationship to begin with. Somehow Lumière gets roped into acting as a sort of couples councillor for them. He isn’t quite sure how. But ultimately he is willing to do just about anything to help his friend find happiness.

LeFou
-LeFou ends up being one of Belle’s most dedicated pupils when it comes to learning how to read and write. He uses his new skills to write a note to Stanley.

Belle and Adam
- Adam likes to turn little every day moments into opportunities to dance. Belle could be doing something as simple as sorting books in the library, only to be swept up in an impromptu waltz about the room. Once they have finished Adam helps her complete whatever task she was doing so that she doesn’t find his spontaneous dances too disruptive.
-He can’t get enough of hearing Belle say “I love you.” He goes completely weak in the knees every time. Every now and then he will ask her to say it “one more time” because he didn’t get to hear the very first time she said it.
- Adam is way more into wedding planning than Belle. Belle just wants a simple wedding, which means he has to reign himself in at times. His excitement can get the better of him. She said yes and he wants to shout it from the rooftops (and has.) He has learned Belle has a certain smile that she gives him when he starts to get an idea a bit too over the top. Ultimately Belle has the final say on everything, because her happiness is all he really wants. As long as she is his and he is hers, that is all that matters.

Agathe
- As news of the engagement spreads, Agathe decides to pay a visit to the castle to congratulate the happy couple. Adam is a nervous wreck the entire time she is there (calmed only by Belle standing protectively by his side and reassuringly telling him she loves him) but is a completely gracious host all the while. Seeing the lasting trauma her curse had on the people of the castle, Agathe bestows a spell of protection over the castle and its residents as a wedding present, providing them with health and prosperity for the rest of their days. As she departs she tells them she will leave them in peace, but will return in a few years time with another gift. As Adam attempts to thank her for her generosity she cuts him off by saying “No your highness. This gift will not be for you. It’s for the baby.” With a wink she leaves Adam and Belle standing speechless, as she leaves to ponder a proper gift for her future fairy godchild.

25. Quick Fix

Bucky pads down the corridor in the tower, barefoot and hair dripping into his eyes. He’s carrying a bundle of clothing that he’s hoping he can sneak into the nearest laundry pile on his way out of the tower – he’s exhausted after missions enough that he sleeps here maybe once a week, so it’ll be good to have some fresh clothes around. He’s even kinda claimed one of the guest suites, one of the empty ones on Barton’s floor, since the guy never seems to be around much to use them.

Speaking of, Bucky dumps his clothes in with Barton’s, and finds the man himself in the communal kitchen area. He’s sitting on the counter with his feet resting on a stool, happily munching on some kinda brightly colored cereal and listening to Tony rant about Reed Richards. Every time Bucky catches Clint somewhere in the Tower he seems to be eating, and he’ll admit he’s got his concerns – do SHIELD even actually pay the guy?

“Hey Robocop,” Tony eventually winds down his rant enough to say. “Have you moved in without me noticing? I thought you were bunking with the Capsicle in Brooklyn.”

Bucky shrugs one shoulder, deciding to follow Clint’s example and grab something from Tony’s overstocked kitchen. He grabs a packet of Poptarts out of the cupboard, ignoring the parchment attached to the box that glows faintly gold. Pray you are worthy, mortal, it says, before you lay hands on this snack food of Thor’s. Bucky sure as hell ain’t anything like worthy, but he figures if it comes to it he can always blame Steve.

He tosses the poptarts in the toaster and grabs a bottle of milk from the refrigerator, taking a swig right from the bottle. Tony makes a disgusted noise; Clint holds his hand up for a high five.

“Steve’s shower’s busted,” Bucky eventually answers, wiping his sleeve across his mouth and putting the milk back in the refrigerator door. “I figured you wouldn’t mind me using one of the dozen you got, Stark.”

Tony snorts, probably at the possibility that he could ever have so few showers, and Clint cocks his head, suddenly interested. Bucky’s not often the subject of his laser focus, and he notices irrelevantly that the guy’s eyes are seriously freaking blue.

“What kind of busted?” Clint asks, a half-full spoon of brightly colored loops dribbling unregarded back into his bowl. “Are we talking flow rate, heat, leaking…?”

“Why are you asking?” Bucky asks, confused.

“Hey, I’m great at showers,” Clint says, and Tony busts out laughing right off.

Keep reading

Control Me

Word count: 1,479

Warning: smut, dom!Sam, teasing, masturbating (male)

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Summary/Request: Thank you @dadd11e for your request! Sorry it took so long!

Sam thinks the reader has feelings for Dean but finds out that they are actually for him. Leads to rough sex and them getting together.

Originally posted by samgirlsclub

Sam’s POV

My eyes followed the sway of Y/N’s hips as she danced over to Dean who was making breakfast. My veins boiled with the jealousy pumping through me as Y/N leant over Dean and giggled at whatever he was saying. As she bent forward the long shirt she was wearing (either Dean’s or mine) rode up to reveal her blue panties. She was obviously trying to show off to Dean as she always did, as she had been doing for the past 5 years she had spent with us, and again all she seemed to be succeeding in was getting me riled up. I eventually gave up trying to keep myself under control and pushed away from the table roughly, storming angrily out of the room.

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Clark back at it again with the domestic Victuuris

Cuddling: 

  • Victor LOVES being little spoon. His ideal position is cuddling Makkachin with Yuuri wrapped around his back like a Koala. 
  • Yuuri also kisses the back of his neck when he first wakes up. It’s something they started doing when they first started cuddling (Since morning breath kisses are gross)
  • Yuuri LOVES being big spoon but for his mid afternoon naps he prefers cuddling Makkachin in Victor’s hoodies over everything else. 
  • After a rough week Yuuri likes being little spoon/sleeping with Victor REALLY close because he has nightmares that the last year was a dream and he’s back in his form or Hasetsu. 
  • Victor also has nightmares but they tend to be the quiet type where he’ll tense/tighten his jaw in his sleep.
  • Makkachin, thankfully, has learned to wake up New Dad when this happens to help Dad. Dads then talk and cuddle more and Makkachin sleeps on their feet then. 
  • Victor likes to nap on his back on the couch. He sprawls out legs throw over the armrest head cushioned on the other one. Usually he’ll put on music and idly think of show ideas until he falls asleep.
  •  After him and Yuuri get together he starts falling asleep with a Yuuri shape hole next to his chest and the couch. 
  • Y’know that cliche of person A cooking and Person B sleepily wrapping their arms around them for good morning? Yeah. They’re both.
  • Even when they don’t cuddle they’ll wake up touching fingers, reaching out towards each other, or just turned towards each other in their sleep. 

More under cut: 

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April Fool's headcanons
  •  Sayu and Light always compete every year to see who will be crowned the prank king/queen
  • Light is a surprisingly avid prankster, but his pranks are always carefully thought out and have waay too many steps who tf makes a spread sheet for April Fool’s??
  • Sayu just likes to see how many times she can get Light to smash his face into the saran wrap she taped in all of the doorways
  • Sachiko won every once in a while with a sneak attack
  • Soichiro just tried to stay out of the shenanigans but he usually failed
  • (He’s very susceptible to the tape-the-spray-nozzle-down-on-the-kitchen-sink prank)

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Assorted headcanons ive come up with over the years (Featuring Lams and Washingdad and modern AU)

-There’s two types of upset/sad Alexander. One where he get angry as a defense mechanism, and the other where he gets really quiet. Type 1 is more common, and he doesn’t usually admit he’s sad, insisting he’s just angry. The second is more rare, and he tries not to let anyone know he’s upset but since he’s usually so outspoken is fails completely. This usually happens when he’s to sad to be angry, or when he knows the reason he’s upset is ridiculous. Examples of this include the time John claimed he was going to move in with Jefferson because Alexander was being stubborn and wouldn’t sleep, John called Jefferson and insisted he was going to do it before going to class. Alex remained quiet and pouting all day. 

-Alexander is a half happy drunk, which he also refuses to admit, but he just giggles and goes around proclaiming his love for everyone, but he also wants to fight everyone more than usual 

-Eliza is v gay and Alex is with John so they’re ultimate gay bros

-Washington is basically all of their dads. college AU professor Washington being Alex’s dad since he was one of the first people to get to know him when he moved, being the rev set’s dad through Alex, and the southern motherfuckin democratic republican’s dad through fights with Alex. On more than one occassion he has had to call someone from the rev set to come pick Alex up because he is to tired/sick both for class and to drive but he won’t admit it

-Hercules is the mom friend 

-Everyone has a weird love/hate relationship with Burr, Alex and him argue alot but he’s on Alex’s emergancy contacts

-Alex will do literally anything for a cookie

-This theory has been tested many times by Hercules 

-Alex learned french so he and Lafayette can bitch about people, and occasionally yells at Jefferson in french just because. Sometimes Alex and Laf will talk about something random but look upset just to fuck with people. 

-Hercules once found a kitten and kept it a secret in the rev set’s apartment for three weeks. 

-It wasn’t a secret they all knew but didn’t tell him 

-They named it Aaron Purr

3

He’s gonna die

Preference "How they act whenever they are excessively horny" (NSFW)

(Heyyyy, i’m back :D YAY FOR OUR FAVES NOT BEING ABLE TO HANDLE IT XD hope it is as requested and you all like it :3 Gifs not mine/Found them on google/credits to the original owner.)

Negan-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d only make inappropriate comments about his dick and how he needs some relief and just go on and on, until you’d lock eyes. He’d end up taking the opportunity to march his way towards you and continue on, only to end up whispering and bend you over to make you feel him as he slowly grinds up against you.

Daryl-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d just show it through his frustration over everything, until he can’t handle it and suddenly gets quiet. He’d make his way towards you and not care for what you’re doing, only to grab you out of nowhere and throw you over his shoulder and slap your ass, to make you understand of his need.

Rick-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d seem as if he was extremely angry, only to end up having you stay away from everyone. He’d tell anyone off and would just keep you to himself. Finally, he’d push you up against the nearest surface and desperately kiss your lips and neck, and lower himself to your body just to start giving you oral, making you realize of his need for you.

Merle-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d have a hard time keeping his hand off of you and really make you unable to do anything else but to pay attention to his problem. It would’t matter to him where you were, he’d grip your waist, kiss your neck and end up with his hand in your pants, as he whispers about much he wants you and all the things he’ll be doing to you.

Glenn-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d be rather positive and blunt about it and not care for a second if anyone hears him. He’d try his best to control it but looking at you so much, he’d walk up to you and then ask you if you have any condoms on you, and if not then that it’s fine as he has some in his pockets, only to end up telling you to join him in the nearest room.

The Governor-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d just have a need to touch and feel you. He’d surprise you with touches to your shoulders and down your arms as he stands behind you, before starting to bury himself into the crook of your neck. He’d end up griping your waist to him quickly and reach to make you want him just as much.

Abraham-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d have the need to show his “Daddy” side of him that you both agreed on and simply catch you to punish you. He’d notice a little mistake in whatever you were doing and just pull you towards him, making you lay on his lap as he gropes your ass tightly and begins to grind up against you.

Eugene-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d curl his fists tightly, trying to control himself and eventually get your attention to his problem. Whenever you wouldn’t, he’d take a few deep breaths, only to look you straight in the eyes to tell you to shut up and that you both just need to “fuck” each other like, “Wild Animals”.

Jesus-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d tie his hair up aggressively and ask you to go somewhere with him. He wouldn’t care if it would confuse you but he’d just need your attention and surprise you that way. As you’d catch on, you wouldn’t even have time to say anything as he’d already have his hands and lips all over you.

Dwight-Whenever he gets excessively horny, he’d think about you and everything that he has done to you, making him unable to function until he has you. He’d make his way to go find you and hugging you from behind, he’d start to grind up against subtly, only for it to turn into some heavy dry humping to the point where you are at least half naked.

Keep reading

Basic Gym Vocabulary  pt.1

As funny as it may seem, a lot of people actually tend to stumble upon confusion when faced with words and slang floating around the gym environment. 

So why not take some time to get acquainted with the terms you will hear the most when you are hitting the gym?

1.Sets

This one is among the first things you should learn and understand.
The word ‘sets’ represents the group of repetitions you perform on any exercises. So let’s say you are doing 8 repetitions for bicep curls - that would be your 1 set.

After performing a set, usually you have a green light to take a rest for a specific time, before you jump right back into it for another set.

2.Reps

Short for repetitions, which represents one complete movement of the exercise.

3.Bench

It can be used in two ways:
noun - a soft cushioned surface for performing bench press exercises as well as some others.
verb - to perform a bench press exercise where you use bench and a barbell.

It may seem fairly obvious. One way of guys showing off and comparing their mad gym records is by throwing in the standard question: “Yo, how much do you bench, bro?” 

4.Bro Science

That is something you hear from your gym buddy. Something that is supposed to be informational but has no facts and science behind it. Do not listen to that bullshit, most of the cases it is a trap!

Example:

“Yo, bro, if you want to bulk up, just drink a glass of olive oil a day. It gives you those extra calories.”
Yeah, it gives you shit ton of extra calories,but that is way too much fat for you to consume per day.

5.Bulking

The phase when an individual is increasing his bodyweight over a set time period. That usually involves eating in a caloric surplus and minimizing cardiovascular training.

6.Cutting/Shredding

I am fairly confident that cutting and shredding are pretty much the same things. Those two words represent a phase when an individual is burning his body fat after a bulk. That involves eating in a caloric deficit and increasing cardiovascular training.

7.Spot

This is when you have a dedicated person being present to help you in case you fail to complete the exercise. Usually that is your friend or anyone at the gym (if you ask anyone to spot you, of course). 

Example:

“Hey, bro, can you give me a spot on a bench?”

Spotting doesn’t mean that the person is going to help you do all the reps. It is usually as a precaution in case you don’t have any more power and can’t complete your set. This helps you give out all you have got and minimizes injuries.

Things you would like to specify when asking for a spot:
- how many reps you are aiming to get
- any additional info, if you have any specific desires to how that person should spot you
- for bench you should also specify whether you need a lift off or no

8.Lift off (for bench press)

When a person that is spotting you helps unracking the barbell. Done to save energy for the actual push and to decrease the risk of having an injury when pressing high weights.

9.Gains

The result and improvements you achieve after a prolonged time of proper nutrition and proper training.

10.Newbie Gains

The rapid results and improvements one would get at first stages of regular training. That is due to nervous system adapting to new movements your body is performing. That is a period where your gains sky rocket. After that period (4-6 months, depending on the person) it becomes much harder to improve your physique even more.


More coming soon! Have a great day and remember - be fit and live healthy!

3

I like you. As long as your heart’s strong, I’ll follow you. But if I think your heart’s weak even for a moment, I’ll take over your body. My name’s Asuramaru. Call my name when you need my power. Open your eyes, make your strong desire stronger, and open up a new path to the world, Yuichiro Hyakuya.

10

The duels between hunters and hunted are as dramatic as any event in the natural world. The stakes could not be higher. For both, it’s a matter of life and death. Yet surprisingly, it’s the hunters that usually fail. To have any chance of survival, predators must be perfectly tuned to their own hunting arenas. Every habitat brings a different challenge. THE HUNT will reveal as never before the extraordinary range of strategies predators use to catch their prey. But even for the most skillful, success is never guaranteed.

vimeo

sneaky mccree