failed but a for effort

Ted 2 (2015) - Ted is Coming, Again.
➭ Play HERE

Months after John’s divorce, Ted and Tami-Lynn’s marriage seems on the same road. To patch things up, Ted and Tami-Lynn plan to have a child with John’s help, but their failed efforts backfire disastrously. Namely, Ted is declared property by the government and he loses all his civil rights. Now, Ted must fight a seemingly hopeless legal battle with an inexperienced young lawyer to regain his rightful legal status. Unfortunately, between Ted’s drunken idiocies and sinister forces interested in this situation to exploit him, Ted’s quest has all the odds against him.

Release Date:June 26, 2015

Runtime:115 minutes

Genre:Comedy

Production:Universal Pictures, Media Rights Capital, Fuzzy Door Productions

Casts:Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Amanda Seyfried, Jessica Barth, Patrick Warburton, Morgan Freeman, Michael Dorn, Dennis Haysbert, Lexi Atkins, Sam J. Jones, Nana Visitor, Tina Grimm, Patrick Stewart, Liam Neeson, Tom Brady, Ron Canada, John Carroll Lynch, John Slattery, Bill Smitrovich, Giovanni Ribisi

almost correct musical titles

·funny grill
·springfield
·{name of production}
·close to average
·enjoyable abode
·a nice guys guide to affection and killing
·a french in washington dc
·lawfully brunette
·the queen and me
·lease
·oil
·lunch at kay jewelers
·a first 6 months
·12
·how to fail in business with extreme effort
·the ghost of the stage production
·hate always lives
·on the lows
·vaguely antique molly

anonymous asked:

Did you hear about the Orphan Works act that might pass in the US and affect other countries? I heard it lets people use copyrighted work(art)if they made an effort to contact the artist but failed! This may not affect you but Im just really worried!

ahh it’s actually just another hoax

5

29 of the Most Horrific Eyebrow Fails You’ll See in Your Entire Life

It takes a lot of effort to get eyebrows that are on fleek, but it also takes a lot of effort to have brows that are SO horrible people actually CRINGE when looking at ‘em!

Unfortunately for these folks (but fortunately and hilariously for us), they’ve taken the phrase ‘eyebrow fail’ to a whoooole new level. Check out 29 of the worst eyebrows you’ll ever see in your entire life!

twistedkit asked:

23. things you said at the wrong time? :)

DEFAULTING TO ERURI


Levi lets his head tilt back, hitting the wall a little too hard on impact. His skull throbs, eyes sliding shut and slicing off the bright fluorescent light overhead, wondering just how the hell he ended up here.

He hasn’t slept in god know’s how long, hasn’t eaten, hasn’t breathed. He got the phone call in the dead of night, sat poleaxed on the edge of his bed by the are you Mr. Smith? Your husband has been in an accident, trying and failing  to survive eruption of emotion the name brings on. Years of active effort to push Erwin Smith to the back of his mind, where he still refused to be forgotten gone to waste in one thirty-second long phone call. Like a stalling clock, the second hand ticking in one spot forever, Levi found himself throwing the bare necessities into a duffle bag and cabbing to the nearest airport before he completely processed the gravity of the situation.

“Mr. Smith?” A voice calls, drawing him out of his head.

His hands falls slack against his knees, instead of coming up to block the onslaught about to kick him in the teeth.

Ackerman. Levi thinks, chest tight. Erwin collapsed the foundation beneath them long before either of them could even consider building up toward a marriage.

Levi’s almost angry. They hadn’t been right for each other, Erwin had said, a gentle hand resting over his. We’re at different places, we want different things. Please don’t take it personally.

We, we, we. Always making decisions for the both of them without consulting Levi first– which, Levi realizes, is exactly how the hell he ended up here on the other side of the country.

“Yes?” Levi answers, too exhausted to correct the doctor.

“Your husband is awake. He’s asking for you.” She says.

Of course he is.


Erwin’s lying half awake on the hospital bed when Levi steps in, pale and sickly against the stark white sheets.

“You came?” Erwin asks, drug-addled, with notes of unbidden giddiness colouring his voice.

“I’m still your emergency contact.” Levi says, shucks his jacket off to hang over the chair. “For whatever reason.”

Erwin grimaces, but there’s a smile coming to his face, wide and bright and nothing like the careful grin Levi was so used to seeing. “I knew you would– I asked for you, Levi. And you came.” He says.

Classic Erwin Smith. The breath shakes out of his chest, tears stinging the back of his eyes. It’s so easy to slip back into it, so easy to love this man, so difficult to navigate around his walls– and yet–

Levi drags the chair closer to Erwin’s bedside, eyes straying to the empty space beneath his left shoulder, counts the insane amount of tubes and wires coming out of him. The steady beeping of the heart monitor rings dully in his ears.

Tick, tick, tick.

It’s easy, to take Erwin’s hand in his own, gentle and achingly familiar.

“Levi,” he breathes, and Levi tilts his head, eyes softening. “Don’t leave me again.” He pleads.

Levi sighs. He wasn’t the one that left.

“I won’t.” He murmurs, waiting for the minute hand to tick forward.

There are two kinds of people in the world: planners (organized, structured types) and pantsers (haphazard, fly-by-the-pants-seat types). This message is for my fellow pantsers. It can be a ridiculously fun thing to be a pantser. We create, give, and work in a luscious, lounging fashion. 

The problem is we are prone to wildly flinging our efforts all over the place. We fail to account for the fact that our time and energy are not infinitely expendable. When someone says the words ‘schedule’ and 'organize’ to us, we wilt and think 'ick! Gross!' 

But what if I told you it’s possible to find a level of planning that feels good even for a pantser? This week, take a look at how your pantsing is influencing the big picture of your life. Where has your energy become unsustainable? In what endeavors are you giving more than you’re receiving? What frameworks can you bring in that will still satisfy your need for flexibility?

 I know answering these questions can seem like a drag, and we pantsers sometimes refuse to acknowledge these issues. But I reckon that if you bring even just a little more order to your approach, you’ll shine brighter than ever.

agent-branflakes asked:

When you have a huge assignment worth a lot of your grade, or you have to get something done for a job, but it entails a lot of work and you don't know how to break it down and keep putting it off so you have pressure to help you focus. But you end up feeling like you are going to fail anyway, even if you work hard at it. So you don't do it at all because it feels easier/less damaging to choose to fail your way than to put in a lot of effort and fail anyway.

“No effort is ever wasted, although some pay dividends later than you think. Do not imagine that you "wasted your time” because something didn’t turn out right. There is no such thing as “waste” in the Universe. Everything – everything – yields benefit. It’s true. And your life will show you this. So don’t decry the “effort that failed.” All things lead to your highest good. You just may not know it yet.“ — Neale Donald Walsch

youtube

Okay but

Anyone heard of the Wonderful 101? No? Just me?

Well watch this when you fail certain events in the game.

Pure gold.

Den of Geek did a piece today on “11 largely forgotten UK sci-fi sitcoms”, and it included BBC Three’s much maligned Clone - aka the source of many a gifset of Mark Gatiss in military uniform issuing sociopathic threats.

This is what they had to say about it:

The show’s sci-fi premise (scientist creates the world’s first human clone, invoking the ire of the military when it turns out not to be a killing machine but a wet-behind-the-ears unsophisticate who makes Father Dougal look like Peter O’Toole) failed to marry with its fish-out-of-water comedy. Despite the efforts of the cast and writers, the end result was rather a damp squib that left you wondering if the production team had dirt on Jonathan Pryce and Mark Gatiss.

Ouch - not a ringing endorsement, and Mark has commented before about how it just didn’t work out as a show and he didn’t particularly enjoy making it. But for all its faults Clone did bring us Colonel Black, who is fantastically, hammily murderous and cuts a fine dash in that uniform. Especially the leather gloves… *drifts away briefly*

If you’ve never seen it before and would like to check it out then the six episodes are hosted on Dailymotion, if you’re in the US you can stream it on Hulu and I’ve also got it to download on Mega via my links page.

3

Ladies of Kirk: #7, Sylvia.

Sylvia is a shapeshifting, telepathic alien bent on world domination. She and her henchman try to overcome Kirk and company first by frightening them with visions of witches and haunted houses, then by tempting them with gold and jewels. The aliens are confused when these efforts fail to have an effect. Kirk discovers that Sylvia has a particular hunger for new experiences in her human body, so he seduces her as a way to get her to betray crucial information. When she discovers his deception, a furious Sylvia transforms into a giant black cat and threatens to tear apart the landing party.

Promise~ Evan Peters (Requested)

*Your POV*
“Promise me.”

I looked down as he stroked my cheek, trying to use my only soft skin that remained on my body to calm his anger. “Promise me, Y/N… Please… I’m not always going to be here for you. I have a job. And as much as I love you, I need to support you, support us so we can afford this house. Food. Clothes. Even the special trips we take. All from my job. But I can’t go if I can’t trust you not to kill yourself.” He sighed as I looked down and pushed my shaking body against the wall, turning away from his deep brown eyes that would suck me in and never let me go.

Silence fell between the two of us as he clenched his fists, deciding if he should be angry or comforting or a mixture of both. Meanwhile I bit my lip, fitting the urge to cry, though my efforts failed quickly as a large sob escaped my mouth.

Almost instantly, Evan got down next to me, shhhhing me and pulling me into his warm embrace, pressing his lips gently onto my aching head. He put his lips then to my ear, gently humming some song in my ear gently as I closed my eyes focusing on the melody.

“I…I love you Evan….”

“I love you too beautiful.”

That was about six months ago, before Evan left to film season 5 of American Horror Story. We skyped every day since, doing the usual scar check and had our little “movie night” every Friday (sometimes with Sara and Finn sometimes joined him) and got the occasional visit from Tassia, but sadly it wasn’t enough. I really missed him, but I understood that he needed to do this. Not only had he signed a contract, but this was his passion and he loved not only loved the show but the people he had worked with their and I did too. Tassia and Sara were my best friends and I had gotten close to Finn when they had me as an extra last season but after the whole cutting thing which the whole cast found out about talk about mortifying Evan pulled me out telling me I was straining myself on all these auditions I was doing and told me that I needed a break. That I was stressing myself but deep down I think we both know what it was.

I had been through this manic phase with Evan many times within the five year stretch of our relationship but never had I self harmed, Being on set with Evan… It just made me feel this insane amount of insecurity as I stared at the many women that Evan had to kiss and do sexual stuff to on camera. It didn’t help that I would get random hate from fans but a lot of it came from the press. So I headed down the eating disorder path. Reading that anorexia made you fatter it was bulimia that I followed. After every meal I would make myself throw it all up. Everyone else in the cast knew about me throwing up… but I think they thought that it I was pregnant which in terms would make the press hate me more. Even Evan himself began to panic so eventually when I was fifty ponds thinner I tried with all my will power to stop but it wasn’t to be. That’s when Sara and Tassia put the pieces together and figured out what was going on. I made the promise not to tell and reluctantly they agreed after a night full of yelling, arguing, and tears. Then this turned into guilt and stress making the depression worse and needless to say that’s when it started.

Evan honestly is the best. He took the year off to help me, not saying a word against my actions until the week before he left. He was scared of what would happen when he left me. And he was right to be.

I was spiraling downwards again, only leaving the apartment once every other week and relying on Skype’s from Evan, calls from Sara, texts from Finn and/or visits from Tassia to get by. They were what was keeping the black hole from swallowing me. Though I knew that a single day without the voices of my friends would let it in and destroy me. I had no chance to fight it.

That’s why this past month has been a living hell. Because I hadn’t been in contact with anyone and haven’t left my apartment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Knock

Knock

Knock

I groaned, rolling over to look at the clock.

Who the heck would be at my door at two-o-clock in the morning?

Though my mind immediately to serial killers and kidnappers but regardless I continued my way down the stair until I reached the door.

Opening it up a mere tiny crack, arms quickly wrapped around me and a snickers coming from the people still standing outside.

“What the-Sara? Finn?” I stood still shocked as Sara dropped me, “What are you doing here?”

“Wow no hello for me?” Tassia said as she stepped into the house. I smiled at Sara, dropping my arms and running to Tassia, hugging her just as tightly as I did Sara. After a brief moment I let her go and shrugged giving Finn a quick hug before looking around rapidly, behind my friends.

“Where’s Evan? Isn’t he with you guys?” I questioned, looking back at my friends who smile down at the ground.

“I’m so sorry Y/N. He’s still filming but he told us that he is sorry and-” I cut Finn off and laughed slightly.

“It’s um… Fine… I’ve just been a bit lonely lately and er…..” I sighed grabbing my right arm, “You know.. I’ve just missed him…” A small tear fell from my eyes but I quickly wiped it away, not wanting my friends to see me like this, “It’s stupid.. But you guys are here now! What should we do?! Do you guys wanna watch a movie? Sleep? Unpack? How long do you guys get to stay??” I faked a bright smile, as only a small amount of happiness rushed over me. The three of them laughed,

“Umm Sara leave Saturday. Finn leaves Wednesday . And I stay for however long I want to.” Tassia said with a wink wrapping me in another hug.

“So I take it you two want to sleep?” I asked, looking to the two who likely flew in from who knows where, “You both have bags in your eyes! Get your asses upstairs! We have two guest rooms! And I’ll take the couch. Tas if your tired..” She smiled and nodded, following the upstairs with a small yawn, looking outside to ensure my friend’s cars were locked before going to make a coffee and heading upstairs to “shower”. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Evan’s POV)

‘She bought it. She’s sleeping on the couch.-Finn’

‘Don’t forget flowers!- Sara’

'Damn flowers too! Someone’s getting boyfriend of the year. ;) -Tassia’

I giggled before setting the phone back down as I pulled into Y/N’s cluttered driveway. No. Me and Y/N’s driveway. Not just mine. Not just hers. Ours. Just how everything should be. And now for the first time in what seemed like centuries, I got to use my house key. Stepping out of the car with the items I got for Y/N and did a jig to the door, quietly turning the knob so that I wouldn’t be heard.

As the door creaked open, surprise filled me as I saw the lights were still on downstairs. Surprise mixed with a large amount of panic began to settle in my mind as I ran around the bottom floor but stopped when I heard the sound of water shutting off coming from upstairs.

I knew two out comes were ahead of me. Good or bad, I knew that I truly needed to go and find the answer. Maybe this was selfish but I had plans and it hurt to know that they would either be renewed or destroyed.

Knowing my luck it would be the second one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blood. Lots of blood leaked onto the bathroom floor and Y/N stood there, her nightgown sleeve rolled up making cuts and watching her blood drip on the floor but I bit my tongue, waiting for her to see me before taking any action. But every-time she dragged the razor across her wrist I cringed and it took everything I have not to speak, flinch, or cry.

Finally giving up, I walked towards her and put away the razor, locking it away. She was so fazed she barley noticed, her hands still shaking from her anxiety. Taking her hand, I grabbed the towel that was next to the sink and moved us both on the edge, dipping the wash cloth out to clean her marks, then after binding the wounds with gauze I picked her up bridal style and set her down gently on the bed. As I began to whisper sweet nothings in her ear, setting a arm around  her waist gently stroking her hair.

“It’ll be okay. I’m here not. You are beautiful. I love you. You are special. You are kind. You are important to me… heck even more important to this world. You are gonna be okay. We can talk about it later. More importantly I am here. I’m home and I’m never leaving you again okay?”

“I promise" 

((AN: OKAY Not exactly what was requested but let me know if you want a second part and thanks for all the requests. Sorry they are taking FOREVER but I hope you enjoy them. I love yall <3 stay youtiful!!!!))

This was requested by hugephanofdanandphil

Thank you for requesting and if you struggle with anything please feel free to come to me for help.

You know what rustles my Jimmies?

People who insist that 95% of diets fail and just about everyone regains the weight they lost later in life. 

Sure, that might make you feel better, but there are thousands, no, millions of people out there who are currently changing their life for better or trying to and your so called positivity goes and shits on their efforts. 

By repeating that diets fail, you’re telling people who want to change that they can’t do it. 

And that really pisses me off. 


EDIT

 It should be clarified that 95% of fad/crash diets DO fail, because they’re either impossible to follow for long or are dangerous. 

The 5% of people who actually succeed at keeping the weight off are those who started a fad diet and once they were done with it started taking care of themselves in other ways.

The 95% of people who failed went back to their usual lifestyles because they didn’t learn any better. 

2

Do you ever think you want attention, scope and reach when really you want to disappear?  Is the way you reach out laced with signals for others to stay away?  Maybe it’s because you want to be left alone.  Your surface wants attention, but it’s the depths of you that call the real shots.  The depths of you want solitude and to explore the self unbothered and ignored.  Maybe that’s why your efforts to reach out fail.  You want something contrary to what you want.