fail yourself

anonymous asked:

Is there any cure for a heart that has stopped feeling guilty of sins?

Perhaps reading about Hellfire and how serious it is, how He gave you all these blessings and you repaid Him with disobedience, or how so many people in their graves wish for Islam, and how you have that blessing and yet still sin, how repeating a minor sin makes it a major sin, so how serious is it to keep doing a major sin?

How Allaah never forgets what you do, thinking of all the people you hurt, how you were meant for better things than this but you failed yourself, how you forget how valuable you used to be, but you traded it for a sin, a short pleasure.

Or perhaps how the only sins you could have committed were with the same blessings He gave you, and yet He keeps answering your du’a and keeps giving you blessings despite how unworthy you have made yourself due to your sins.

Or maybe how people see you to be a good person and yet Allaah knows everything you did. How you fear having your secret sins revealed to people, but find peace in knowing that Allaah knows about them? How you sometimes laugh despite disobeying a God who is always there for you.

Staying awake at night and just reflecting on how your sins have encased your heart in darkness the same way you have encased yourself in a dark room.

But just remember it is better to feel guilt for your sins earlier than later, because once it becomes very late, you will become overwhelmed and find yourself in a position where you are tortured by the guilt every waking moment of your life and nothing you do will ever ease it. Guilt is an ocean that purifies us, but too much of it ruins a man..

Be alone. Eat alone, take yourself on dates, sleep alone. In the midst of this you will learn about yourself. You will grow, you will figure out what inspires you, you will curate your own dreams, your own beliefs, your own stunning clarity, and when you do meet the person who makes your cells dance, you will be sure of it, because you are sure of yourself.
—  make sure you know yourself :))

For the women who’ve recently left an emotional abusive relationship.

There is nothing enviable or admirable about an abusive, weak minded man. These type of men live within their delusion, and actually convince themselves that they’re special, needed, missed or wanted.

The truth is, when a toxic man is removed from a woman’s life, like a cloud of darkness leaving after a storm, winter turns into spring, and just like flowers, she reclaims her love for herself and blossoms.

Abusive men never prosper. However, you will.

So, forgive yourself, take accountability for your part in the experience by reflecting on how you failed yourself, what red flags did you ignore? why did you attract that negative energy?, fall back in love with yourself, partake in a higher vibrational lifestyle, hold your head high and strive.

- Meggan Roxanne

But can we just talk about ep3 for a minute? And about poor baby Jonghyun?
Not to make anyone sad but, it broke me.

When he saw Minhyun coming in through that door and he just went on and thought ‘Why are you here? Get out.’
He trusts them to do well, even though, it’s not their fault, they are tired and frankly, I hope they don’t give up fighting. Even if MNET is evil, even if the editing makes you like this, don’t give up. We can see the good in you. So others will too.

When they had to pick the leader for Minhyun’s team, and everyone choose Jonghyun, but you could see it in his eyes, he didn’t want to be a leader.

Jonghyun said that he’s afraid to be a leader, because he doesn’t want to fail them, to let them down, like he did with NU'EST and I can’t really cope with that. He didn’t fail NU'EST, he didn’t broke their promise, they are a team. A leader shouldn’t carry all the hardships and all the blame on his shoulders, a leader doesn’t mean it’s all on you. You can ask for help, you can rely on others. You don’t have to apologise to Minki and the others for going up to B Class. They will do better, they will follow you.

This child blames himself for everything and apologises for things he didn’t do or shouldn’t apologise for.

But then Minhyun went on and said, 'I believe in Jonghyun.’ and I felt like crying. Jonghyun shouldn’t carry the burden alone, and yet he does it.

Someone please stop this child, please protect him. Because I can’t stand watching Jonghyun being in pain anymore. I can’t stand watching Minki cry. I can’t stand looking at Minhyun being so tired and I can’t stand looking at Dongho how he almost lost all hope.

PLEASE PROTECT NU'EST. THEY DESERVE THE WORLD.

3

cause certain things mend us when we’re hanging on for dear life
we held on so tight

Tips for Building a Healthy Self-Esteem

1. Pay attention to any physical needs.

2. Carve out relaxation time.

3. Spend time with people who like you, and who get you.

4. Take time to feel proud of the things you have achieved.

5. Decide and enforce healthy boundaries.

6. Allow yourself to openly disagree with others.

7. Decide on your own goals – and then go after these.

8. Allow yourself to fail, and sometimes make mistakes.

i don’t care how low you think you’ve reached… never give up on yourself.

Are you overcomplicating astral travel?

Here’s the thing: By far the most common question I get from people is “how do I astral?” Which is, well, a big question. It begs other questions, like:

>Why do you want to travel

>WHERE do you want to travel

>Do you have jobs you need to do over there or are you gonna hang out

etc etc

But here’s the thing: Often people decide to travel, and then they get stuck. They try a method they maybe heard about once, and it doesn’t work, so maybe they research another method. Maybe they pick up a book on the topic, maybe the book tells them “you’ll know you’re astral traveling when you can rise out of your body and see it on your bed.”

BOOM. Imma stop you for a minute.

There it is. This is the moment the Gold Standard™ for the new person gets set in stone. The mind now says “If I’m not hovering above my body with full range of vision, I’m not Traveling, with a capital T.”

So now we have this goal. The person may feel a little more confident because there is a road map in front of them, and that map may have steps, often detailed by a book author, or maybe even a blogger here on tumblr. Maybe the person tries the steps, and fails. Maybe it takes months. Maybe it takes years, but eventually, maybe the person gets frustrated, and they give up.

“I just can’t travel”, they say, truly discouraged, or “I’m just not meant for this, if I was, I would have been hovering outside my body by now.” They maybe pack up the books and leave it be.

Perhaps you see people on tumblr or blogs that talk about full blown OBE or extreme situations, and then you internalize THEIR gold standard, and then you fail to achieve the standard. Same situation applies.

Imma stop you right here. What happened?

  1. Person decided they wanted to travel
  2. Person researched or was told what “authentic” travel looks like
  3. Person attempted to reach the “authentic” standard
  4. Person failed, and then
  5. Assumed they were not meant to travel, due to their failure to reach “Authentic Travel”.

BUT

Here’s the secret, my bros:

1. There is no one form of “authentic” astral travel. You will find this is an epidemic with older books on the astral, when astral “travel” or astral living was equated on a wide scale with your classic OBE, or Out Of Body Experience. So in reality, what many people are trying to achieve, when they want to travel, is an OBE. Based on what books/people tell them. But that is FAR from the only way to astral–in my case, for example, I’ve never achieved full OBE–and not for lack of years of trying. (Because I thought that was How One Astral Traveled)

1-A. THERE ARE MANY FORMS OF ASTRALING BESIDES “TRAVEL”. I don’t travel because I lead an astral double-life–I “tune in”. An OBE is wrong for my circumstances, and if I would have learned that sooner, it would have helped me a lot. There are people that astral-trip only in dreams! People that astral-trip only while DAYDREAMING! People that mentally trip but never leave awareness of their body, people who can’t “see” anything there but hear everything perfectly, people who can only see the astral in black and white, people without a “form” or a body, people with only a bizarre pinprick field of vision! HONESTLY IT’S ENDLESS. Learn your style!

2. Because there is no one form of “authentic” astraling–there is no ONE WAY to achieve the travel! If you fail at going OBE, there may be a perfectly good reason you aren’t suited to that route! The failure here also lies on authors and books that imply there IS one way of authentic travel, and therefore, the user is set up for a failure situation a lot of the time. (And for example, OBE LEAVES your body open for attack or walk-ins in a lot of cases–did you ever think this was your natural energy defense system preventing you from leaving yourself a shell?)

3. Your way of travel is probably NOT going to match someone else’s, so you absolutely need to drop the gold standard now. I am NOT telling you to give up on discernment, because that will keep you alive when you reach the astral. I am telling you that if you have lofty expectations of what the astral is going to be like for you based on someone you’ve read (including me!) you need to drop it before you go, because it’s likely to fuck you up. I have listened to hundreds of different astral experiences, and I co-run the astral atlas–it’s all remarkably different for each individual based on your needs and jobs.

4. Your ideas of the astral are probably going to get blown out of the water when you get there anyway. Know this. Expect it. It will constantly surprise you and remind you that this isn’t In Your Head, and in doing so it will shatter your ideas of what it is, over and over again. 

5. Stop complicating things. If I had a nickel for every time person that came to me and asked why they can’t astral, and I gave them the idea of “Well, did you try opening a door?” and then the look of revelation descended, I’d be rich. This is not a blame on you, because I don’t blame you for this over-complication thing. We’re humans, we like to complicate everything, it makes us happy and whatnot. It makes me almost tremendously happy to shroud things in pomp and circumstance. But seriously–have you tried opening a door? Like. Visualize a door, and then open it, and then walk through. That’s how I first got to the astral.

After weeks of trying and doing all this complex shit, eventually I was told to visualize a door, and walk through. And then I was fucking there.

(Can you imagine how pissed I was, though. Like wtf I WAS TOLD MY ENTRANCE WAS TO BE GRANDIOSE AND MAGNIFICENT, not a fucking shitty wooden-ass door with nobody around to see me. Harumph, I said. I ended up in an empty field in fuck-all nowhere, if you wanted to know.)

I’m not saying it’s always easy to get to the astral. It has ways of keeping you out (or in) inside mental spaces or white rooms until you’re ready to be out on your own. This is where discernment and patience come in. But I AM saying if you find yourself failing over and over again at this thing, ask: Is it because you have an unconscious Gold Standard? Analyze why. And then, let it go. Because it’s not going to help you, it’s just going to make you anxious and perpetuate the failure cycle, trust me. And then ask: Am I overcomplicating my approach/expectations because of my gold standard? Analyze that, let it go.

Then, try an amazingly simple thing like opening a door, and stop cutting yourself off at the pass, and just let it happen.

You might be surprised at the results.

(This post is aimed at people who a) WANT to astral and b) have a hard time doing so for unknown reasons. It is not suggesting everyone should astral if they don’t want to or have no interest, if that wasn’t self-evident.)

customer satisfaction

Originally posted by shitohsehun

woozi x reader smut

20,480 words

a/n: my first woozi fic, my first seventeen fic, my first kpop fic. this was supposed to be something really simple and silly, but my dumb ass had to go and add a bunch of sadness and backstory to it, as always. as you can see, it got dramatically out of hand. i’m so sorry, i hope someone likes it

~ in which you haven’t gotten off in like six months, and lee jihoon is the pleasure specialist, himself. (he’s also a little bit more than that.)


     “I promise you, you won’t regret this,” Wendy reassured you, but they were words she always said right before she convinced you to do something that you definitely would regret. She’d used them very often over the past year, during which she’d somehow persuaded you into going on roughly thirty blind dates that she’d set up in her desperate attempts to get you “back out there.” You knew her heart was in the right place, but every single date had been a disaster. 

     The problem was that if she knew a guy who wasn’t already taken, there was a reason for it. The first set-up been with a guy named Jinho who still lived with his ex-girlfriend (in a one bedroom apartment) and adamantly refused to wear deodorant; one guy, Jinwoo, told you he had recently quit his job and moved back in with his parents because he hadn’t had enough time to play League; you’d tried so hard to will yourself to forget the second to last guy, but how could you forget the name (Daehyun) of someone who sat down across from you and proceeded to ignore you for the whole two hours it took him to eat a salad, baked potato, and two steaks before “suddenly realizing” he forgot his wallet, telling you he didn’t think you were his type, and leaving you to foot the bill.

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