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Passive-aggressive Curses - Petty Witchery ;)

~May you step on a Lego every time you walk through your home barefoot.

~May your internet go out in the middle of your new series on Netflix binge.

~May you get logged out of Facebook and fail to remember your password.

~May your food always be burnt when eating out.

~May you miss a noticeable spot every time you shave.

~May your hair go flat just as you get wherever you’re going.

~May you never be able to wear shorts again without getting a camel toe.

~May your pet always pee on any left out clean laundry.

~May you always forget to write your name on your work.

~May your mom or spouse discover your computer porn history.

~May you break a nail within 24 hours of getting them done.

~May your Starbucks always be the wrong order.

~May you forever laugh out loud at the wrong things in public.

~May you shart during sex while you’re on top.

Originally posted by unemployedbuthappy