Your reality is important and what you feel and who you are is valid, no matter what anybody wants to tell you, no matter what the world wants to think, you’re valid and your feelings are valid, and you’re important, and you’re loved and you belong anywhere, cause you’re a human being and you fucking belong and I love you.
Keep your life private and you’ll enjoy it. Never put your business in public and then expect the public to stay out of your business. If you have a problem with someone don’t tell social media, tell the person involved.
Last night I finally came out to my dad. He was the last person in my family I had to tell. I left him a letter to read while I went to stay somewhere else for a few days. I wanted him to have a few days to himself to just process this huge change. He texted me last night, assuming after he read the letter, and told me he loves me. I couldn’t be more proud of myself. I feel so relieved, like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. My friend told me I should share my letter. He said it covers all the bases. I am going to share my letter on every social media platform I can and on Reddit in the hopes that it will help someone some day, even if it’s just one person.
Here it is:
This letter is not very easy to write as I’m sure it won’t be that easy for you to read either. I’ve been hiding a huge part of myself from you for a while and I’ve gotten to a point where I’m ready to tell you so I’m just going to say it. I am transgender. *Transgender: denoting or relating to a person whose self identity does not conform unambiguously to conventional notions of male or female gender.*
For the longest time, I identified as lesbian and I ignored and denied any other possible identity until about a year ago. I started realizing how much more comfortable I was when appearing masculine. People would call me “sir” or use male pronouns when referring to me and I wouldn’t correct them. I have always been male at heart and in my mind although it wasn’t that long ago I started admitting it to myself. The first time I said it aloud to myself, a huge weight was lifted of my shoulders. Within, 48 hours of admitting it to myself, I was coming out to my mom and her family, my siblings and all my friends. I had mixed reactions which was expected as this is a huge change. Also, I came out a couple weeks ago at work and every one of my coworkers were accepting and supportive; the human resources office called me personally and asked me what name I preferred to be called and how they could help in making my transition at work easier.
For me, being my true self will mean doctors appointments, hormone replacement medicine and surgery. I have been waiting to start making appointments until I told you. The medicine I will go on is Testosterone. It will change my physical appearance to be more masculine and it will make my voice deeper. I am telling you this because I want you to know that even though my physical appearance will change, my personality will not. I will still be the same person you’ve known for 21 years and I hope that one day, you can accept and love me as your son and not your daughter.
For the past year, my friends, now my coworkers and some family have used male pronouns when referring to me and calling me by my preferred name which is Charlie. I am more comfortable with myself now than I ever have been before but, not completely; hormones will get me to that point.
I love you, Dad.
P.S. I did not want to be there when you read this so you would have time to process it alone. I will be home later this week.
this person on facebook asked SDHRS for advice because their bunny, whose testicles just became visible (a young bun, then) was being really aggressive and didn’t want to be touched unless it was for pets, but his butt-ish area seemed to be bleeding so they needed a way to check. they couldn’t figure out a way, but they took him to the vet and…..
guess what this lil guy did?
he had started to tear his own testicles off.
tear. his. own. testicles. off.
needless to say, he needed to be emergency neutered. because apparently, one way or another, those balls were going to go. best to do it safely, i suppose….
Plenty of companies are using popular social sites like Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn to search for employees. It’s important that job seekers keep this in mind as they continue to establish their online footprint. Here are 6 tips for managing and leveraging social media sites to find a job:
1) Create accounts on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn, or any other social media sites that you’re interested in.
2) Treat your profile as your résumé.
3) Maintain a professional page.
4) Friend, follow and connect with companies you’re interested in.
5) Join your college alumni group on Facebook and LinkedIn.
6) Never stop updating your profiles and pages with any new experience, accomplishments or skills.
Tumblr, maybe nobody will actually read this. But I just wanted to ask if anyone could give my younger brother some support. He isn’t doing so well, living with my mom who makes his life living hell. My younger brother right here, John, was bullied in middle school, so severely that he has thought about taking his own life.
He’s only 14. I love him so much, even though we didn’t get along so well when we were growing up because I’m 5 years older than him, but we still managed to be really close as we got older. He doesn’t deserve to be stuck thinking life isn’t going to change.
Tumblr, I want to show him that so many of you have overcome the thought of suicide by giving him encouraging thoughts, and advice and just supporting him. He needs to be shown that not only do I care about him living, but others he hasn’t met yet, care too.
TUMBLR, IF YOU READ THIS, IF YOU REBLOG THIS, PLEASE, WRITE SOME HEARTWARMING THOUGHTS FOR JOHN. PLEASE, I BEG OF YOU.
I absolutely detest those advice for teenagers things that say things like, “toughen up, grow a backbone, the world is cruel,” it’s just a bad excuse for adults to keep mistreating people. If everyone who said that made an active choice to be kinder, then the world wouldn’t be cruel. It’s our fault that the world is cruel, and it’s within our capability to fix it, to use your own words, “take responsibility for your actions.” Even when an out of human control bad thing happens, it makes things far better to offer help and support, than to say “life’s cruel, deal with it.”
Kids deserve better than we had, not the same.
Some handy tips for helping protect your friends' privacy online
1. If their Facebook posts are friends-only, do not share them with people outside of their friends list without permission!
2. If your friend’s public-facing accounts clearly only use their first name (I am an example of this), then do not publicly reference those accounts with their full name! Nobody needs to know your friend’s last name if they choose not to publicize it!
3. If your friend uses a pseudonym as their online handle on some platform (this can be either an alternate name or a made-up handle like many people have on Twitter), then only reference their presence on that platform using that pseudonym! As a general rule of thumb, just refer to the person however they refer to themselves in a given space.
4. NEVER share screencaps from a closed/secret Facebook group (as opposed to an open group, in which all posts are public) without permission. I don’t care if someone annoyed you.
5. Don’t let the ridiculous furor over “vaguebooking” keep you from guarding someone’s privacy. One person’s “vaguebooking” is another person’s “sharing personal frustrations or problems without dragging another person out for public shaming.” It’s perfectly legitimate to just post, “I saw a post that conflated being bi with being someone who cheats, and here’s what I think about that…”
6. Even if someone’s posts are public/findable, be careful about sharing them if you have a much larger online following than them, wield disproportionate influence, and/or know that you have trolls or bigots among your following. You may be The Best Person Ever but your followers might not be. Be honest with yourself about this and don’t get defensive. Help keep your friends from being deluged with online harassment and threats.
7. If you want to share screencaps, even of a public post, ask first, because there’s something about screencaps that many people find uncomfortable and a little creepy even if the original post was public.
8. If unsure, just ask. Safe is definitely better than sorry when it comes to privacy, especially for marginalized people, especially for marginalized people who are not “out” in some significant way, and especially for people who may have abusers or stalkers. We already have to deal with malicious people trying to destroy our privacy, so we should be able to count on not having our friends destroy it carelessly because they didn’t stop and think before posting.