f u double c k

whatta man  -  jun || pt.1 (M)

summary; plain jane + makeover by amazing best friend + whole new you + bad kid = a cliché falling in love story at a party??

genre; hmmmmmmmm teen party angst but the rest is a mystery ;)))))

Mature content warning?? maybe that gives you a little hint to the genre??

a/n- wow i’m actually writing something proper for seventeen dear lord i hope this does well this has been gathering dust in my drafts for well over a month i realllllllllllllllllly went to town with this one wow also i’ve only written 2 things for jun so that needs to change

Part 1? Yeah part 1.

12AM. You should be asleep. Safe and sound in your bed, with your rather large bunny plush that you won that time at the fair with Joshua. But no. Seungkwan. Your friend– sometimes you question that statement before- had picked you up from your house, asking you if you wanted to take a little trip to the local McDonalds. You would be lying if you weren’t shit scared, but you were also curious as to why he goes to McDonalds at 2 in the morning. 

“Seungkwan why are you taking me to McDonalds…I want to sleep….”

“You can…we just have to pick someone up.”

“Why did I have to come along though…?”

“Safety in numbers.”

“Seungkwan…this car is bulletproof. Your dad even mentioned it–” 

“Oh, he’s here. Jun!”

You hear Seungkwan shout out of his side of the car, leaning out a little bit.All you can see out of the window was a dude running towards the car with a bag of McDonalds in his arms. You’re honestly so confused about who this dude was, until you heard his voice.

“Hey, so I got your stuff– is that Y/n?”

“Hm? Yeah, I asked her to come along so she could keep me company…I kind of woke her up though…”

Just one snooze from falling asleep, you woke up to hearing your name being called out. You rubbed your eyes a little, before noticing that he was getting in the back with you. You knew exactly who it was. Wen Junhui. Infamous for messing about with people. A lot. You didn’t know how Seungkwan became friends with him in the first place, and you were curious to find out. 

“Hey Y/n, how’ve you been? I haven’t seen your pretty face in ages.”

“Hey…I’ve been good…I’ve just been busy with college and stuff.”

You lied. You merely blushed at the fact that he called your face pretty, but you were still unsure of him. Yeah. Like what was mentioned before, Wen Junhui was known for messing about with people in high school, and even now you were hearing about the rumours that he was still messing about with girls of all sorts from before. Yeah, even you. Ok so he asked you once to come back to his place after your group of friends merged with his, and you two were the only ones left at the park that day. You weren’t the type of girl to….fuck around…and you still aren’t, if the occasion ever arose that he would ask you again. A couple minutes later and you were sick of the silence that was being produced by everyone not talking, so you spoke up, glancing over to Jeonghan.

“So…why are you out so late?”

“Well…you know…I was round a friend’s house…we were just chilling and I didn’t exactly have a ride back home, so here I am.”

Correction; I was banging a girl and had no way of getting home and the closest person who had a car was good ol’ Seungkwan.


“You’re coming to the party, Seungkwan?”

“Party? Oh yeah, when is it again?”

“Next week friday.”

“Yeah we’ll be there, don’t worry.” 

Seungkwan assured, pulling up beside the curb, stopping slightly. You heard the word ‘we’. You were hoping that he meant himself, Mingyu and Seokmin, but knowing those two they’re probably already going. Seeing Jun get out the car was weird. You focused on what he was doing, especially all the little things he did, like fixing his..beautiful…pretty…blonde hair. Shit. Y/n stop. No. Bad Y/n. He leered back to you and gave a sultry smile, his hand placed near the top of the car, gripping it tight. A slight lip bit to the side, then his eyes locked onto you.

“Well, I’ll see you two next week. You are going, Y/n?”

“Oh…I’ll be there. See you later Jun.”

What in gods earth was that? Were you trying to be sly and mysterious…sexy….? Just like him…? Or were you just nervous? Or were you lying all together? Looking back, Jun handed you the last of his fried with the dip, also handing you a wink to go with those fries. That mere blush turned into a deep one, as soon as the car door was slammed shut. You surveilled his every movement, leading up to him walking into his house. You turned back to the front again, where you happened to notice Seungkwan eyeing you in the overhead mirror. THe car then started up again, en route to you humble abode. Luckily your parents were out of town for the month so they would have no idea about any of this. You then remember- we. 


“Yeah…it’s would be fun, and you said yourself that you were going to go.”

“But Seungkwan, that was in the moment of it all and there was a lot of lip biting coming from him on his behalf and I’m kind of a sucker for that and of course I said yes and I’m digging myself a bigger hole here.”

“You really are it’s hilarious. Have you been to any parties before?”

“Well yeah–”

“Proper parties. Ones with alcohol, set in the quiet neighbourhoods with the toilet paper on the roof?”


“I know you’ve had alcohol before, because I bought it for you. What are you going to wear?”

“I’ve think I got something in mind.”

“That’s dangerous. No, leave it to me.”

“Seungkwan, are you sure?”

“100%. I’m gonna make you look so good that Wen Junhui will drop his drink and go straight to you. He’s going to be like–damn…she looks good.”

“Seungkwan you don’t have to…really you don’t.”

“Just watch you can’t stop me Y/n.”


You let an unimpressed sigh as the car quickly slots into the curb again, right next to your place. You get out, phone and fries in tact, outfacing Seungkwan as he winks to you and smiles like a little child. You missed the days of just being kids, but now, what the world really cared about was how fucked up you can get, and to see who splits the condom first and ends up making a family they never wanted. Simple plans, executed really, really badly, and early too. With every day that went past, Seungkwan seemed to be messaging you about these…parcels that he’s been getting, and just using the two eye emojis with every picture. And with every picture your nervous interior got a new makeover of emotions to go along with each day. And finally, it came to Friday. The day of that party. What fun. 

“Today’s the day…..let’s see who gets wasted first..Seokim or Soonyoung?…I’ve always heard stories about them two getting absolutely smashed but never really seen it myself…”

Seungkwan had asked you to go get washed and stuff before he comes round at 4, and like a puppet, you did. You washed your hair, you shaved, you even exfoliated and put that nice Victoria’s Secret Hydrating Cloudberry body lotion on. You never exfoliate anything, and you never touched that bottle of lotion that your friend gave you before. So….what fucking gives? Was Seungkwan right? The night before he had texted you about wanting to impress Jun, but you had no interest in that at all, even though he made your heart flutter nearly a million times when you saw him. But suddenly there’s this overwhelming urge to….need his attention, all of a sudden? Why were you craving his undivided attention? Was there a need to make people jealous? You had to admit he was a little grease ball. In fact that was his nickname in high school. But his way with words had you drawn in. F u c k. Everytime he spoke, there was a new feeling of wanting to hear that voice all the time. And to hear that voice from above you, too. Double f u c k. Soon enough, you hear the doorbell ring as you’re drying your hair, and you walk downstairs to hear not one, but three voices. Your idiots were here. The main one being Seungkwan, of course. You tugged a little at your shorts, since it was gluing itself to your skin because of your tacky, still slightly damp skin. You open the door and a flurry of hellos and heys were given your way. You didn’t expect Seungkwan to bring friends. but it was a nice thought, since it was still early. 

“Y/n. You, me, upstairs now. It’s showtime.”

“Yeah…ok but because you used that word so many times in the last week, I’m scared.”

“Y/n, don’t be, there is everything in here. Everything.”


“Oh yeah, everything. Now come on!”

Another sigh absconded from your mouth, as you started to walk back upstairs to your room, with Seungkwan coming along. And who should follow? But Seokmin and Soonyoung. Seungkwan noticed just before entering and started to close the door. Soonyoung put his hand between the door and the frame, with Seungkwan stopping to close the door on the way.

“Hey, hold on, don’t we get an input in what she wears?”

“Soonyoung you horny corndog you’ll say yes to everything she wears, even if she wasn’t wearing anything.”

“What about me?”

“You’re no better than him, mr I-can’t-believe-she-left-me-oh-wait-there-she-is-hold-my-drink-I’m-going-to-grind-on-her!”

“That was one time, let it go!”

“That one time also lead you to asking a dude if you could look at his nuts. nad even know he had a pack of monkey nuts in his hand we all knew what ones you were talking about!”

“It was an accident!”

“Oh really? Ok Soonyoung, remind me of the time that you took a girl into the bathroom and ‘accidentally’ whipped your dick out! Tell me Soonyoung, did she suck you off well enough for you to not regret it?”


“AH. I rest my case.”

Seungkwan sighed, watching what you were doing behind. Whoa…..he had the receipts and everything. All he needed was the loud laughter, the large wigs and contour that could slice a bitch to go along, and then this could have been another episode of UNHhhh with Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova. You were quite curious as to what Seungkwan was saying, actually. 

“What are they asking?”

“If they could come in and give input that is use–”

“Oh, that’s fine. They can come in as long as they don’t break anything.”

Walking to your bed, you wondered what was in the bag, glancing over to see the three boys enter her room and stand before her. Seungkwan had this…sort of smirk on his face, mixed with a grimace. He brought his bag up to the bed, opening it up. Inside was a multitude of different clothes, in plastic packaging. 

“Because I missed your birthday I managed to get these clothes for you. The lady said that she could have them delivered pretty quick, so that was a good thing. First of all though, it needs to match your style…librarian.”

“Just because I read books doesn’t mean I’m a librarian….”

“You and Wonwoo spent 6 hours in that bookstore. 6. Hours.”

“I like reading, ok?”

“Right….so your look is close to the kind of…cute….kind of slightly sexy/aesthetic look right? Not too dangerous but just enough to add a leather jacket or something….make that denim instead.”

“You think so?”

“Of course! You wear those denim skirts right?”

“Yeah, but nothing like these…”

You added, picking up one of the skirts, which was one slit away from being a cat toy. Seungkwan took that one back, laughing nervously. With whatever outfit Seungkwan gave you, you began to become partial to the outfits with the tennis skirts. You didn’t know why, but it just kind of reminded you of the flow-y skirts you used to have when you were younger. Seungkwan managed to also by a lot of accessories with the purchase, so every outfit had a personal touch. In the end, you chose a nice outfit that really did show off your softer side. First things first, you never knew that fishnets could be so comfy but annoying at the same time. So the fishnets were a light dusty pink, with tiny rhinestones placed onto every crossing of the lines. It was actually a very nice accompaniment to the outfit as a whole. The next thing was the white tennis skirt, with the black lines at the bottom of the skirt. Matched with that, there was a light blue top that had this check look to it. On the front it had ‘milk’ sprawled across the front, to emphasise the….aesthetic. Nothing else. Just the aesthetic. White tennis trainers were in as well, so your old pair of Adidas superstars were a perfect touch. Somehow…….Seungkwan made an outfit that you really liked. 

“Wow. Jun won’t be able to take his eyes off you!”

“This isn’t for Jun…”

“Something is telling me it is, you look really good Y/n.”

You handed a smile over to all three of them, before looking to the watch that was still on your wrist. Seungkwan noticed the watch as well, thinking if it would go with the outfit. And in conclusion….it didn’t. But….that was the least of your troubles and worries for that day. Seungkwan’s words stuck in your brain; he won’t be able to take his eyes off you! Maybe…he was right. Having this new image for this one night……might just steal his heart. And maybe make his weenie go wild but go off, I guess. You sighed, scanning yourself up and down, checking if anything looked silly. Fixing your skirt, in the mirror, you noticed Seungkwan bringing out a large vodka bottle. You immediately turn around just idled the bottle.

“Whoa…..it’s so big…”

“That’s not the first time I’ve heard you say that, Y/n.You said that to jun the last time you saw him.”

A blush crept up on your cheeks, making your small smile turn into a quite angry look. 

“Kwon Soonyoung I will beat your ass just like I did when you threw my book in the water.”

“Right you did win that fight….only cause I let you.”

“No you didn’t! I won that fight fair and square…”

A pout soon aligned on your lips, as you walked out the room to get cups. Seungkwan started to take the other clothes out his bag and place it on her bed, while Soonyoung and Seokmin were looking on their phones. Just as you were coming back up with the mixer and the cups, you couldn’t help but to stop and listen to the conversation that was going on in your room.

“Hey should I ask Jun what kind of underwear he likes?”

“Why would you do that??”

“Everyone has preferences, you know. Like some people….myself included, like lace. Others like the mesh kind of look, and others like satin.”

“That’s true…hey Seungkwan what type of underwear do you like?”

Seungkwan turned around from the door, blinking to them. You were still listening to the conversation, another large blush creeping upon your cheeks. You didn’t hear him answer. Wait, did he know you were there? Did you really want to go in there mid sentence? Well, you still have to give them the cups and stuff, so you might as well. 

“For me it’s definitely lace– oh Y/n is back.”

You walk into the room, placing the cups and mixer down. You pretended to be confused and asked them what they were talking about. That large blush stayed on your face, smiling to the three boys as they came round to get the pre-drinks.

“We we’re talking about what kind of underwear we like, and it seems that me and Seungkwan like red lace, and Soonyoung likes the mesh kind of style. What’s more comfortable to wear?”

“Huh? More comfortable…..hmmmm….I would have to probably say–”

“Pink and black lace.”

You turned around to see seokim glancing down to his phone. You then immediately felt a shiver go down your back- you saw Jun’s name on the top of the phone. So many thoughts came racing through your head but cleared up since you remembered the context of the conversation, and what you heard from the door. 

“Pink and black…that’s a good mix.”

So….Jun likes Pink and Black lace, huh? Well…..you had a plan. In the spur of the moment, you came up with a plan. You told the boys to wait downstairs, while you just cleaned up your room. Then, you wanted to look through your drawers for something. Before that though, you did your makeup. It was very minimalistic, but certain aspects of your looks matched, like the light pink eyeshadow you had on, matched with both the pink and blue of your outfit. You also had mascara, highlighter, the gradient lip look, all that good shit. But…when it seemed like the coast was clear from the boys, you closed your door and looked through your drawers.

“Pink and black….black and pink….pink-black…black– here they are!”

You reached into your drawers, and took out a matching set of underwear, pink and black lace underwear, to be exact. So what? You couldn’t actually deny that you were trying to make his dick go berserk, but minimal effort was needed. Emphasis on the word minimal. Minimal being the key word here. Minimal. Jun…is like a dog. Not really, but use this just as an example- dogs get excited over their owner’s underwear and just rip and tear them to shreds. Trust me, this happens more than it should. There’s one similarity and two differences to Jun being a….well…..dog. He’s…not a dog, he doesn’t rip underwear to shreds– or at least tries not to. But! He does get excited over just the mention of what sort of underwear a girl was wearing. That mention could come from the girl themselves or someone else, that he didn’t care about. he just wanted to see them for himself. You quickly changed into your outfit and just headed back downstairs as if nothing ever happened. You see them downstairs in the kitchen already having a good time.

“Why did you get Smirnoff again? I thought you had enough for Grey Goose…”

“Vodka is vodka Soonyoung, just drink up!”

You could see that Seungkwan…wasn’t a fan of Smirnoff. Or vodka at that rate. You kind of found out that he was a rum kind of dude. You smiled as you grabbed your phone from the counter, looking to the three boys who were just downing shot after shot. You took a couple too, which was totally unlike your character. You would only have like a sip, but like your secret sexual drive, you felt adventurous. Keeping a sly eye on the time, you realised it was nearly time to leave. So you four got ready to leave the second it turned 5:30pm.

Meanwhile, Jun was just, sitting up on Mingyu’s roof. Why the roof? Well…the party was at Mingyu’s, and that was his little slice of…heaven. Just to think about anything and everything at the same time. There’s a plot twist in here somewhere……it’s here. Jun…he messes about with different people. You know that, right? But….he’s also…really afraid of commitment. Some horrible person broke his heart on his first ever date….all the way back in the 9th grade, and it ultimately made him go around, bang everyone and be the man he is today. But…there’s a problem with that. He’s kind of been lying to himself. About what? You. Before you two me in the 10th grade, he’s seen you around school and stuff, and he’s had…..a little bit of a crush on you. But he threw away those feelings pretty quickly after he became the man he is today. Under the amazing and deadly influence of alcohol, he’s prone to spilling a lot of things out from both his heart and mind. So…tonight…he was on the fence about seeing you- either he was going to fall forwards into the same cycle that his life has been going through, or to fall backwards into you. 

anonymous asked:

listen here binch,,,, my imploded poly ass turned black hole has been absorbing so many positive and loving poly headcanons that its about to turn into a poly headCANNON. I'll take u out w intense adorableness. I'll do it. -imploding poly ass anon


That one bench press post

It’s normal, a normal day with a normal person known as Matt Holt at the gym in the garrison. To him, adding the additional leisure gym was an all around bad idea. It was helpful to keep himself in shape, but Matt Holt was anything but out of shape, it was just one small factor that got in the way quite frequently, he was gay as f u c k.
The equipment was in a good quality and it was open for 24 hours, and had a bigger range of sports for pleasure. It was expected that as soon as it opened cadets would be pouring in to get more physical training or just some time to enjoy the sports that they don’t get to play much. So Matt had naturally wanted to try out the new running machinery. But he had no idea how stupid he was to not mentally prepare himself, because a gay in an all-male division of a gym with l o t s of muscles and l o t s of attractive people does not mix without an outcome that would probably get him into trouble. So, not even making it to the equipment he sees a GREEK GOD™.
God is real. God is good. But God does not have good timing, God wants to kill Matt with his cause of death being sending Apollo to run on a treadmill in all his toned glory and give him a heart attack. He does not know where to start. First of g o d d a m n those legs. The man has LEGGINGS that cut off just after the knee so Matt can appreciate those gorgeous (and he means gorgeous) calves. He wanted to praise the holy sight. Jesus Christ. This man has thighs for d a y s. He bets they are comfortable enough to rest his head on, to sit on, to-ok we are going too far, get yourself together Holt. He wants the man to strangle him with his thighs. (Matt Holt is not kinky, he just- you get it.) his chest, that chest should be ILLEGAL because Matt feels warm to just look at it even if it is under a shirt that is too tight why is he wearing, ok. And holy fuck. H o l y f u c k. God decided to tell Apollo to double arm day. God. Damn. The last of his concerns is that one is a prosthetic, because why have two when you an have an arm that could make someone faint. That someone being a very, very flustered Matt.
His face is just heaven sent, with a jawline that could c u t and cheekbones that are perfect and warm, inviting hazel eyes that are just so beautiful and-
o h.
And staring right at him.
If Matt wasn’t red already, he was sure of it now as the man winked as he slowed down and got off the treadmill to go do bench presses. He knows Matt has been suffering, and he’s using it against him, the little fucker.
The entire time Matt uses the vast selection of running equipment he stares at that gorgeous person currently working just a little too slowly and suggestively than normal, just to frustrate Matt even further. Even when he reads his textbooks whilst going on the treadmill, (a habit he always seemed to have) he sneaks a few glances under his over sized reading glasses and bangs.
Matt Holt was never a smooth talker. Sure, he dirty talks and sound flirtatious when he wants to be, but in a situation like this, he’s a stuttering mess. So that’s why he is completely unprepared when hot Greek god guy™ walks his way and stops in front of where he is taking a break on a bench at the side of the oversized gym. Realizing that he is yet to even breathe, he decides first impressions are everything so he wants to look good in front of this hot stranger and he thinks he does well, but he only manages a sharp inhale and a squeak before trying to bury his embarrassment by hiding his face and, forgetting he was still wearing his reading glasses, presses them harder into the bridge of his nose and leaves a faint red mark. He dared to look up and blushes furiously at the realization that the stranger watched the whole ordeal with his full attention and amusement in his eyes.
It just occurred to Matt that maybe this stranger was disturbed by how obviously Matt has been staring at him for a very long time, and perhaps he hated Matt now, he’ll never have a shot, maybe he’s already in a relationship oh god, he’ll call Matt a creep and-

“uh.. Before you say anything I swear I’m not a creep. Well at least I know I’m not a few people have called me that before but I- ugh I mean that you..um..you..”

“Ah.. Um I’m takashi shirogane, or Shiro.” ‘Shiro’ coughed and looked away, and Matt must have been imagining the faint red to his Cheeks.

“Just fucking bench press me" Matt breathed, not thinking.

W h a t.

“What,” Shiro said, trailing off.


“NO! Uh…no. It’s ok, I mean what you said, if you really meant it, I would say you’re cute yourself.”

Oh my god. Hot stranger thinks he’s cute. Shiro thinks he’s cute. Takashi thinks he’s cute.

“Thanks, kashi!” He said, still on a high of being complimented by Takashi fucking shirogane.


“..kashi?” Shiro said, an amused lilt to his voice

“Do you not like it?”

“I like it, actually. I never got your name?” It sounded like a question, a clear social clue Matt congratulated himself on smoothly following.
“Matt Holt. Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too, Matt Holt.”

After only coming to check out the new leisure centre, he came out with a new phone number in his contacts, rosy cheeks and the dumbest, silliest and biggest smile in the world.