Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter - tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms father….And one fine morning – So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.
One writes of scars healed, a loose parallel to the pathology of the skin, but there is no such thing in the life of an individual. There are open wounds, shrunk sometimes to the size of a pin-prick, but wounds still. The marks of suffering are more comparable to the loss of a finger, or of the sight of an eye. We may not miss them, either, for one minute in a year, but if we should there is nothing to be done about it.
..there was one of his lonelinesses coming, one of those times where he walked the streets or sat, aimless and depressed, biting a pencil at his desk. It was a self-absorption with no comfort, a demand for expression with no outlet, a sense of time rushing by, ceaselessly and endlessly - assuaged only by the conviction there was nothing to waste, because all efforts and attainments were equally valueless.
pg 80. The Beautiful and the Damned - F. Scott Fitzgerald
I woke up out of the ether with an utterly abandoned feeling, and asked the nurse right away if it was a boy or a girl. She told me it was a girl, and so I turned my head away and wept. ‘All right,’ I said, 'I’m glad it’s a girl. And I hope she’ll be a fool–that’s the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool.’
F. Scott Fitzgerald, Daisy Buchanan, The Great Gatsby
Worry about courage Worry about cleanliness Worry about efficiency Worry about horsemanship
Things not to worry about:
Don’t worry about popular opinion Don’t worry about dolls Don’t worry about the past Don’t worry about the future Don’t worry about growing up Don’t worry about anybody getting ahead of you Don’t worry about triumph Don’t worry about failure unless it comes through your own fault Don’t worry about mosquitoes Don’t worry about flies Don’t worry about insects in general Don’t worry about parents Don’t worry about boys Don’t worry about disappointments Don’t worry about pleasures Don’t worry about satisfactions
Things to think about:
What am I really aiming at? How good am I really in comparison to my contemporaries in regard to:
There was the odour of tobacco always - both of them smoked incessantly; it was in their clothes, their blankets, and the ash-littered carpets. Added to this was the wretched aura of stale wine, with it’s inevitable suggestion of beauty gone foul and revelry remembered in disgust.
Things are sweeter when they’re lost. I know–because once I wanted something and got it. It was the only thing I ever wanted badly, And when I got it it turned to dust in my hands.I’ve often thought that if I hadn’t got what I wanted things might have been different with me. I might have found something in my mind and enjoyed putting it in circulation. I might have been content with the work of it, and had some sweet vanity out of the success. I suppose that at one time I could have had anything I wanted, within reason, but that was the only thing I ever wanted with any fervor. God! And that taught me you can’t have anything, you can’t have anything at all. Because desire just cheats you. It’s like a sunbeam skipping here and there about a room. It stops and gilds some inconsequential object, and we poor fools try to grasp it–but when we do the sunbeam moves on to something else, and you’ve got the inconsequential part, but the glitter that made you want it is gone–“
Nelle bianche ore morte pensava che voleva essere buono, voleva essere gentile, voleva essere coraggioso e saggio, ma tutto era molto difficile. Voleva anche essere amato, se poteva farci entrare anche questo.