Andrew wants to kiss Neil.
Correction: Andrew wants to kiss Neil’s scarred cheeks.
It starts with Andrew coming to a realization.
While they were on the roof watching the last light of the day draining away, Andrew realized he felt calm. It was different from his usual kind of calm detachment, because he wasn’t distancing himself from anything. There was the purple hues in the gamut of the sky, the smudges of fading orange from the sun, the weight of Neil’s head on his shoulder, the warmth of Neil’s body leaning against his, and he felt – soft. At ease.
It made him angry.
He had shoved Neil away and left the roof. Neil kept his distance, allowing Andrew space without asking for any explanation. It made Andrew angrier.
Not unkindly, Bee told him, it’s because you’re unused to this.
Andrew didn’t tell her, there is no this. He told her, I want to try to be gentle. But I don’t think I am capable of it.
She told him, you are. She told him again, Andrew, you are.
Andrew has kissed other parts of Neil that aren’t his lips. His hipbone, his thighs, his navel. Neil has kissed other parts of Andrew too. His forearms, his chest, and of course, his neck.  
But Andrew has never kissed any other parts of Neil’s face, and he realizes that he wants to. He wants to press his lips to the pleats of knife scars on his right cheek, to the whorl of burn marks on his left cheek, to the tip of his freckled nose. He’s dug his teeth into the defined corner of Neil’s jaw, but he wants to kiss it too.
In the dorm room, when they are by themselves, Andrew tells Neil, I want to try something.
Putting his pencil down and closing his textbook, Neil tells Andrew, okay.
In the bedroom, Andrew says, I want to try something, but I need you to close your eyes.
Neil looks at him, then says, okay.
Andrew looks at him, then closes the space between them. The light from the bedside table skims off Neil’s eyelashes and splatters over his skin in gold.
Andrew asks, yes or no?
With his eyes closed, Neil says, yes.
Andrew tucks Neil’s hair behind an ear, leans forward with his chin tilted, and kisses Neil on his cheek. He feels the bob of muscle under his lips, but Neil keeps his eyes closed. Andrew strokes his thumb over the spot he just kissed, and thinks, yes.
He shifts a little and kisses the knot of pink skin on Neil’s other cheek. He does it once, twice, thrice. He does it again and again, each kiss softer than the last.  
He falls back flat on his feet. He didn’t realize that he was standing on his tiptoes.
He tells Neil, you can open your eyes.
Neil opens them, blinking slowly, eyelashes fluttering.
He asks, may I?
Andrew nods.
Neil raises his hands and cups Andrew’s face. The tips of his fingers glide into Andrew’s hair. The blueness of his eyes is annihilating.
He asks, may I?
Andrew says, yes.
Neil leans forward, and kisses Andrew on his forehead.
Eyes falling shut, Andrew exhales softly. 

He thinks, yes. 

playlist 2.0


  1. Blackbear - Do Re mi
  2. Stargate - Waterfall ft. P!nk, Sia
  3. Clean Bandit - Symphony feat. Zara Larsson
  4. Cashmere Cat - Quit ft. Ariana Grande 
  5. Already Gone - Sleeping At Last
  6. Kygo - It Ain’t Me (with Selena Gomez)
  7. EXO - Hurt
  8. Supergrass - Alright
  9. London Grammar - Nightcall
  10. KREAM - Taped Up Heart ft. Clara Mae
  11. Cloves - Don’t Forget About Me
  12. BANKS - Fuck With Myself
  13. Gabrielle Shonk - Habit
  14. Charlie Puth - Attention 
  15. Kehlani - Distraction
  16. EXO - Call Me Baby 
  17. Paramore - Hard Times
  18. Lana Del Rey - Lust For Life ft. The Weeknd 
  19. Neiked - Sexual 
  20. Sleeping At Last - As Long as You Love Me
  21. Linn Brikell - Get Lucky
  22. The Weeknd - D.D
  23. Little Mix  -  Word Up!
  24. The Weeknd - Reminder
  25. Jacquees - B.E.D
  26. Zella Day - 1965
  27. Ta-ku ft. Wafia - American Girl
  28. Ta-ku & Wafia - Love Somebody
  29. Clean Bandit - Tears ft. Louisa Johnson
  30. Little Mix - No More Sad Songs
  31. 6LACK - Ex Calling 
  32. Marc E. Bassy - You & Me ft. G-Eazy
  33. The 1975 - The Sound
  34. Dillon - Thirteen Thirtyfive
  35. Troye Sivan - TOO GOOD
  36. Wafia - Heartburn
  37. Mothica - No One (Kayge Calypso & DUNN Remix)
  38. Xavier Omär fka SPZRKT - Blind Man
  39. Hayden James - Just A Lover
  40. Margaret - Cool Me Down
  41. Medasin - Daydream (feat. Joba)
  42. BANKS - And I Drove You Crazy
  43. Sabrina Carpenter - Thumbs
  44. Years & Years - Ready For You
  45. Zayn - Wrong (feat. Kehlani)
  46. Niykee Heaton - NBK
  47. Full Crate x Mar - Nobody Else
  48. Stanaj- Goddess
  49. Young The Giant - Silvertongue 
  50. Aminé - Caroline 
  51. Imagine Dragons - Thunder
  52. Tove Styrke - Say My Name
  53. Skizzy Mars - I’m Ready ft. Olivver the Kid
  54. Kings Of Leon - Crawl
  55. Flume - What You Need
  56. Bea Miller - Burning Bridges
  57. The 7th Sense - NCT U
  58. Elle King - Where The Devil Don’t Go 
  59. Vampire Weekend - M79 
  60. The Strumbellas - Spirits 
  61. Roy Woods - Dangerous 
  62. Snakehips - All My Friends ft. Tinashe, Chance The Rapper 
  63. Gin Wigmore – Written In The Water 
  64. ZAYN - Still Got Time ft. PARTYNEXTDOOR 
  65. Lorde -  Liability
  66. Lana Del Rey - God knows I tried 
  67. Sam Smith - Leave Your Lover 
  68. Russ - Look 
  69. The Neighbourhood - #icanteven ft. French Montana 
  70. Childish Gambino - Sober 
  71. Charlotte Cardin - Like It Doesn’t Hurt (Feat. Husser) 
  72. Trevor Moran - Let’s Roll 
  73. 6LACK - Worst Luck 
  74. Blackpink - Boombayah
  75. Blackpink - whistle
  76. Nct Dream  My First and Last
  77. Halsey - Alone
  78. Halsey - Strangers ft. Lauren Jauregui
  79. Halsey - Don’t Play
  80. Halsey - Walls Could Talk
  81. Halsey - Bad At Love
  82. Camel Power Club - Altaïr
  83. Katy Perry - Power
  84. Bea Miller - like that
  85. Rita Ora - Your Song
  86. Camila Cabello - I Have Questions
  87. Andrew Belle - Black Bear
  88. The Black Keys - Tighten Up
  89. Thomston - To and Fro
  90. VÉRITÉ - Rest
  91. angus maude - i’m happy you exist
  92. Clinton Washington - Black & Blue
  93. Sophia Black - k i s s i n g
  94. Sody - Sorry
  95. Eyes for You - EZA
  96. Charlotte Cardin - Dirty Dirty
  97. SYML - hurt for me
  98. EZA - Shape of You
  99. Hamilton + Rostam - A 1000 Times
  100. Ruel - Don’t Tell Me
  101. Charlotte Cardin - Big Boy
  102. IZA - I Put a Spell On You
  103. Arcade Fire - Chemistry
  104. MØ - XXX 88 ft. Diplo
  105. VÉRITÉ - Somebody Else
  106. Andy Kong - City Lights
  107. Andy Kong - All We Are
  108. SYML - Where’s My Love
  109. Cage The Elephant - Trouble
  110. Cage The Elephant - Cold Cold Cold
  111. Cage The Elephant - Too Late To Say Goodbye
  112. Jasmine Thompson - I Will Follow You Into The Dark
  113. The Weeknd - Twenty Eight

i love an angel? ian posted these pictures and i cried because she’s so beautiful. i had to do something, so i ran to photoshop. you know, as you do.

they’re sized for an iphone 6 lockscreen, but if you’d like me to size them differently just shoot me an ask! 💙

please like or reblog if you use!


never got the chance to post these yesterday since i had to leave the stream early, but the mystery games stream with ian was really fun!! i definitely left zork more confused than when i entered it, but she had lots of fun 💕

+ bonus, the whisper box is in the way but this was a cute one and i couldn’t let it go

Mutual Comfort


He’s been up for almost two days when Tony slouches up to the door of his favourite Orphanage. It’s a small, ratty little house you could walk past without giving it a second look. The door is faded, once white paint, edged in a cheerful yellow. It has one of those old door knockers that Tony simultaneously loves and hates; he loves the drama of a door knocker, but hates the way it reminds him of big, empty mansions and broken promises.

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