I may not be as honest as I ought to be now that
When the walls go up, I said it didn’t worry me
But it hit me like an avalanche
No, I can just be paranoid, don’t quell the desire to know
What was really going on, does it really fucking matter?
Babe is all you can ask me, okay, fair play here we go
I’ve heard those words before
Are you sure it was nothing
Cause it made me feel like dying inside
Never thought I was insecure, but it’s pure
Didn’t notice until I was in love for real
And if we’re gonna cross the line
Just to find what shit’s happening
If only I could reach your mind
Oh I’d be fine, I’d be normal
Now’s my time, gonna do it
And suddenly I’m the phony one
The only one with a problem
True love is bringing it out of me
The worst in me, and I know now
Do you remember the time we were
The time we were by the ocean
I didn’t care if it was day or night
The world was right where I wanted
Girl I’m sorry
Babe I mean it
Babe I’m sorry



there is a Croatian song I really love that goes something among the lines of “I tattooed my eyelids on the inside so now you will be the last thing I see before I die” (roughly translated)



it’s two am
and all i smell is coffee.
it’s already getting light outside
the brightness doesn’t
help my eyes
they don’t find it hard to close
at night but somehow forget
how to sleep.
the daylight embeds itself too deep
like tattoos on eyelids
like tears ultraviolet
tossing and turning and
pain shooting up my spine and
tension in my shoulderblades
i’m seeing
hearts and spades
cards laid across
my stomach they’re
playing poker on my body
and i feel
dirty, like a pool table stained
with alcohol rings
scratched up like traintracks
and i’m written
in sharpie, all over
my body
too fat.
too empty.
to damn overwhelming
too bitchy, too selfish
too many issues with daddy
and i smell coffee
and the caffeine won’t
let me rest easy
they’ve penned me too deeply
ink’s seeping into my bloodstream
the words sinking too freely
and i crack, and i shatter,
like candy glass after
i think
they might
have seen me.
—  “candy glass” // f.l.s.