Stay (Thomas Jefferson x Reader)
Request - Can do #33 in list one with Jefferson?
Prompt - “I love you. I fucking love you”
Tw - swearing
“You’re leaving again?” You looked at your best friend Thomas Jefferson with disbelief, standing in the doorway as you watched him pack his belongings into a bag.
“I’m sorry, Y/N, but I still have unfinished business in France, I have to go back for a while.” He responded to you without looking away from what he was doing, barely acknowledging that you were more than just a voice at the moment.
“How long is a while going to be? Why didn’t you just finish everything before you left? You surely didn’t just figure out that you were leaving so why didn’t you tell me before?”
“I’m sorry,” Thomas repeated, running his hand through his thick, bushy hair before using it once again to cram everything he deemed necessary into his suitcase. He felt guilty for not telling you sooner, but he really did hate it when you were sad. “And I don’t know how long I’ll be, but I will come back.”
You stood there, helpless as you watched Thomas, someone who you had been friends with for as long as you could remember, someone who had been by your side forever until the day he left for France, leave once again. Silently, you watched as he stood, lifting his bag with him, and walked out the door, past you. He began walking down the stairs and you followed, thinking of something to say to possibly get him to stay.
As you saw his hand extend towards the doorknob, you grasped onto his arm without trying, stopping him from opening the door. He turned to face you, your head was down and your eyes were brimmed with tears, struggling to keep them back.
“Please… Don’t leave me…” You murmured, your eyes fixed on the floor.
Thomas looked at you apologetically. “I’m not leaving you for too long, you’ll be fine.”
You shook your head, tears beginning to fall silently. You wanted to believe that you would be fine, but you felt that you wouldn’t. You had what felt like thousands of drafts of letters that you had addressed to Thomas while he was away that you hadn’t sent to him in fear of what me might say in response to them. All of them confessed the feelings you had for him but you were never sure how to word it exactly. It would sound too stupid and cheesy, all this about falling in love with your best friend.
“Thomas,” You began, “I-How do I say this…. I love you. I fucking love you. Almost since the moment I laid my eyes on you. Every waking moment while you were gone you were on my mind. And I almost feel stupid for not saying it before. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. And it breaks my heart every time I have to watch you go off somewhere, forgetting about me. Selfish, I know, but I can’t help but feel like other people could be throwing themselves at you, getting your love and affection that I’ve wanted for so fucking long. I can’t live without you because I’d be incomplete. Whenever you leave, it’s like a part of me leaves too. And so here I am, tears pouring out of my eyes, begging you to stay, even though it probably doesn’t even matter.” You choked on your last word, breaking into a sob and falling onto your knees.
Thomas stood there a moment, dumbfounded. He knelt down, taking you into his arms as you continued crying. He whispered soothing words into your ear and rocked you back and forth. Once you had calmed enough to stop your tears, you lifted your head to look at Thomas, to be greeted by his lips pressed firmly against yours. You melted into the kiss, but it was short-lived as he pulled away to look you in the eye.
“Y/N, I’ll be back as very soon as I can. I’m not going to forget about you. Ever. I’ll write whenever I have the time.”
Thomas smiled. “I promise.” He rose, offering you a hand to help you stand. You happily accepted the offer, holding his hand for much longer than you should have. You smiled back, still realizing how much you’d miss him.
“Y/N,” Thomas paused before he closed the door, turning to look you in the eye. “I love you too.”
He closed the door and you watched him from the window as he stepped into the carriage and rode away. You knew that if he really loved you, he’d come back.
You can’t keep everything you love locked in your arms because things that important to you can’t always stay.