exploding house

Tony Stark survives an explosion created by his own hands a few feet away from him with only shrapnel in his chest, survives chest surgery with no drugs to numb the pain, survives torture and waterboarding while having a car battery attached to his chest, survives the walk through the desert with no water, survives the climatic ending explosion, survives palladium poisoning, survives race car crash with only scrapes and bruises, survives god nearly strangling him, survives flying a nuke into space with no oxygen, survives multiple panic attacks, survives house exploding around him, survives snow and freezing temperatures in a shirt and pants, survives experimented human torches attacking him, survives climatic ending battle, survives battle against multiple buggy iron suits, survives thunder god nearly strangling him, and survives direct hit from the winter soldier.

All without his suit. 

Tell me again are we really sure Tony is just a normal very intelligent citizen and doesn’t secretly carry some form of recreated supersoldier serum that Howard probably experimented on him with. Because otherwise Tony Stark is a helluva tough guy. 

Tori tries Escaping
  • Tamara: I've got this! HEY!
  • [grabs ketchup bottle.]
  • Tamara: KETCH this UP!
  • [throws ketchup, which hits a car. the car explodes]
  • Tamara: Uh…
  • Matilda: *grabs hotdog* To be FRANK, you've got no FURTER to go!
  • [throws hotdog. a jogger slips on it and falls, taking out a mailbox]
  • Matilda: Er…
  • Ell: *grabs mustard* You MUST-ARDmit… there's no escape!
  • [throws mustard. it crashes through the window of a house...which explodes]
  • Tori: Okay, okay! I surrender!
  • Ell: Huh. Nice trail of destruction.
  • Tamara: To be honest...I'm more ashamed of the puns.
  • Dad: All you do is watch YouTube. Your brain is going to rot!
  • Me: But... it's educational.
  • Dad: ???
  • Me: Uh... Dan and Phil said that if you use non-bakeable food coloring your house will explode.
  • Dad: -_-
  • Me: ...
  • Dad: ...
  • Dad: *sigh* Alright...

Super self indulgent doodle…! It just started as a joke about not being able to dig through garbage bins anymore and somehow escalated!! I’m very sorry.

That being said, I can’t bring myself to draw anything past “one sided infatuation”, especially with a self insert… QuQ; I hope no one is really expecting more.

Nanu tried to make a joke but didn’t expect such an awkward response. She has her hands up and ready to be cuffed!! How embarrassing… This is why he just lives with a bunch of Meowth and doesn’t associate with people.


Send in one of the following quotes from HUA to get my muse’s reaction!

  • There! I took the fucking shot! She’s dead! There’s blood everywhere!
  • Okay, Christ, fine, I’ll help you. But only ‘cause you’ve got nice tits.
  • Hey, (name)! (name)! This is awesome! You should totally join in! Seriously, there’s like 40 zombies in here! Just one shot in the head and they explode! Just like House of the Dead, only like, 100 times more awesome!
  • Oh, fuck the hell yes.
  • Sweet Black-fucking-Sabbath!
  • Oh, if it isn’t the Catholic Church! And what’s this? No Little Timmy glued to your crotch? Progress!
  • You done goofed.
  • …you Protestant fuck-bucket.
  • I’m a fuckmothering vampire!
  • You are reading your master’s mind! Put my head between your booooooooobs!
  • Oh, I’m sorry, I like to dirty talk when someone’s sucking my dick.
  • It’s just that I’m so agitated, because this blond little shit just strolled into my room, destroyed my 70-inch plasma TV, and is trying to impress me like I’m his alcoholic father.
  • Ah, fuck it. Skull-fuckin’ for everybody!
  • I would do fucking anything right now to get out of this.
  • Oh fuck, that’s an anti-tank rifle. OH FUCK, THAT’S AN ANTI-TANK RIFLE!
  • What are you gonna do? Call that one guy who can stop me? What was his name…Michael McDoesn'tExist?
  • Get that bitch a cannon! Bitches love cannons.
  • What’s wrong, demigod? Just grow back your legs! Summon up your demons! Hit me! Fight me! Give me a hug!
  • You know, they say TV makes you violent. But I’d say not having my TV is making me pretty fucking violent!
  • Shut up and take my money!
  • Nazis~!
  • Master! My breasts keep getting bigger!
  • Jesus wants a hug!
  • Right this way, Group B! That’s right, right in front of everybody else; you’re eighty, you’re used to it! We’re going to look at art and paintings, which I believe are also art! I dunno! I’m Cockney, I’m uncultured!
  • That’s right. I’m going to FUCK the fear turkey!
  • HEY DANDY DICK! You missed.
  • The fuck is this? The fuck is that?! The fuck are THOSE?!
  • You cheeky dick-waffle!
  • Zis is my favorite kind of ship — laden with blood und seamen.
  • Chuh-chuh-chuh-CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE!
  • Ah. The return of the “why” boner. With a vengeance.
  • By Jove, you fuckin’ header of a woman! You’re surrounded by fifty Nazi vampires, armed literally to the teeth, and what do you do?! You get out of your fuckin’ car, pull out your sword, cut off one of their heads, and yell “Come at me, you Kraut shits!” NO WONDER (name) wants to plow that virgin soil! I’M THINKING ABOUT GROWIN’ SOME FLOWERS MYSELF!
  • (thing) for days.
  • We were prepared for a full-on tactical assault. Instead, we got a volley of swastika-covered dipshits running dick-first into enemy territory.
  • Hey, if we’re killing Nazis, we’ll worship a side of bacon!
How you destroy the house.
  • Flooded the house: Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Virgo, Pisces
  • Set the house on fire: Aries, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Capricorn, Sagittarius
  • Caused the house to explode: Aquarius

Being an American today is like watching your house slowly catch on fire and not being able to do anything about it and freaking out, when suddenly you hear a “BOOM!” behind you and it’s Britain, their house just exploded and is REALLY on fire and you, helpless, just wave hello from across the street.