Somebody once asked me, a little horrified I think, “Wait - what are the bad parts of being neurotypical??”
I’d made an offhand comment about how being autistic has good and bad parts, just like being neurotypical has good and bad parts.
I think one the bad parts of being neurotypical is that you don’t get so many of the amazing parts of being, for example, autistic.
Neurotypical people can fidget, for instance, but they can’t ever know how good it feels to have your body just flow into a stim, to feel your thoughts start lining up or your body get comfortable when you stim the way you need to. Autistic people (and some others!) have this amazing experience where our bodies find motions that express and comfort and regulate in ways that neurotypical people can never fully understand.
And neurotypical people can enjoy sensory experiences, but to be autistic is to have a unique relationship with sensory input. So much of our sensory experiences are amplified compared to those of NTs , and while that can and does cause overload etc. sometimes… when the input is good? It’s glorious. Good fabrics and good sounds and good smells and good tastes and textures - we get to feel them all more intensely.
And echolalia! Echolalia is so good and so enjoyable and neurotypical people, I think, get only the barest shadow of what it’s like.
NTs can have hobbies and passions and callings, but they can’t ever, ever know the pure and consuming joy that is a special interest.
There are good and bad parts to being autistic. Neurotypicals, you’re going to have to accept that, and along with it the concept that autistic people have good experiences that you, by virtue of being neurotypical, simply cannot have.
You don’t see yourself as an object of pity because you lack those experiences, do you? You aren’t going to pour millions into research to have brains like ours, are you? I mean, even if you could do it, you wouldn’t be you anymore. And the way your brain works is just fine for you, you don’t mind not having good autistic experiences because you have your own!
Well - same. I don’t want to be neurotypical. Being autistic is an integral part of my personality, and I wouldn’t give up my good autistic experiences for a shot at your neurotypical ones in a million years. What I want is to be accepted for who I am as an autistic person, for people to respect and accommodate my needs the way the world respects and accommodates your needs as a neurotypical person.
And just like that, your fate was sealed - because Min Yoongi was absolutely going to destroy you. But hell, if you weren’t going to let him, or bask happily in the flames as he did so.
And sadly, at the time, you didn’t think that your thoughts would become so literal.
“There are all kinds of addicts. I guess. We all have pain. And we all look for ways to make the pain go away. - Sherman Alexie, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian
→ Pairing: Yoongi/Reader → Word Count: 6,867 →Genre/Warnings: Soulmate AU, Angst, →Chapter Index
Park Jimin’s arms tangle around the woman you do not recognize. Hands wrapping around her waist, as she is then tugged further into Jimin’s embrace, and when their lips connect, a sudden pain illuminates through your body so brightly it rivals the affects of Min Yoongi’s gaze.
The pain is like a knife starting at the tip of your heart and slicing through. And it’s not in one quick semi-painless sort of way, either. It’s a slice that is poorly executed, that is off to a rough start. You can almost feel every sharped raggedy edge as it tears your heart in half.
The luminous effects causes you to move a hand to settle over the place where your heart resides, because witnessing what you are, it’s the only thing that can reassure you that it is, in fact, still in tact. Still beating. Still pulsating blood. Still keeping you alive.
There are so very many things that she would like to be Tasting of everlasting joy on heartstring’s bended knee. To dance along the shoreline of love and misery Whimsically in motion, ethereally traipsing closer to eternity.
She walks though she is weary She sings of first delight She speaks not the volumes held dear She sets the world alight.
Softly though she treads Her mark her soul does leave Gently as a whisper Sunshine and chaos does she breathe.
Hold her to you fiercely Boldly touch the laughter in her eyes Grasp what adoration few can fathom Before her innocence wisens and learns to fly.
ANOTHER GIIIIF! And actually, another gif rotoscoped from Captain America: Winter Soldier. Not a ton of movies out there (that I know of anyway) with sick ass knife flips!! Anyway, bit of an experiment with motion blur here, but I’m pretty pleased! AND it didn’t take as ABSURDLY LONG as the other one did/is. :D
(Oh, and if anyone knows animation stuff and has advice/concrit/tutorials that would be totally welcome! I’ve taken like…a beginners class, but that’s it, and I’m using photoshop)
Also, would people like me to post just the gif and then put the description in a reblog???? I don’t want the descriptions to cause clutter or whatnot?
“We can feel the vibration that comes from the candle flame, burning it
way into our innermind, no blurry images, clear as crystal, we enter
into the highest consciousness, on our journey back home, we possess the
eagle’s eye, the eye that can see the invisible.”
~ Michael Bassey Johnson
Visionary artist, Ean K Pegram “Out Of Body Experience” ~ George RedHawk motion effects
( DarkAngelOne )
Alex’s response came through gritted teeth. “Saying I have to relax makes me do the opposite, Sawyer.”
Maggie grinned up at her from her place between Alex’s legs, kneeling on the ground to the side of the bed, with Alex splayed out on her back on the bed in front of her. She gestured with her hands, and Alex, with a nervous puff of air, moved so that each of her heels were on one of Maggie’s shoulders, completely opening herself up.
“This feels so weird,” Alex muttered, dropping a hand over her face.
“Shh, baby. Just take a deep breath, and I’m going to come inside you when you exhale, okay?”
Alex let out a frustrated groan and pressed both her hands over her eyes as hard as she dared. But she took in a deep shaky breath and then, with a slight hitch, let it out and tried – really, really tried – to relax her muscles.
“Good girl,” Maggie muttered absently, as she used her more dexterous right hand to reach inside of her girlfriend and experiment with a type of motions Alex has never felt before.
“You’re doing great, baby.”
“Just keep breathing.”
“Relax, baby, you’re okay.”
“I got you, baby, you’re fine.”
“Tell me if you need a break.”
Alex just pressed her hands harder to her face and tried not to squirm or to cry or to accidentally kick Maggie in the head.
It wasn’t until hours later – when Alex had showered and then taken a long bath, letting herself soak, and she was in her sweatpants on the couch, and had a mug of her favorite evening tea in her hand, and Maggie was curled around her, and her favorite blanket was on her lap – that she could finally let herself fully relax.
She dropped her head onto Maggie’s shoulder. “That sucked,” she said.
Maggie didn’t need to ask. “Yeah, but you did great, babe.” She pulled Alex closer into herself.
Alex let out a little huffing laugh. “I did nothing.”
But Maggie kissed her head. “You did great,” she said again. “Really.”
“Thank you, Mags,” Alex said softly, into her collarbone. “I can’t imagine having anyone else do that with me. You’re an amazing girlfriend.”
Maggie cuddled her in even closer. “Anytime, babe. Besides, hey, remember when you told me you never liked intimacy before me? Seems like it’s my duty to do all the intimate things possible with you that you’ve been missing out on.” Maggie smirked down at Alex.
Alex rolled her eyes as hard as possible. “Sure, Sawyer,” she said, pushing herself off Maggie’s chest and standing. She reached out and snagged the offending diva cup – now fully washed and sanitized – off the coffee table before walking it into the kitchen and dropping it firmly right into the trash.
Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. “This was exactly the type of intimacy I’d been missing.”