expect a lot

90 inch 1080p 3d

a/n: to rninjoon ;u; thanks for all the minjoon feels

“he wants you to do what?” namjoon’s spoon falls with an unsatisfying plimp. and jimin winces as tiny flecks of milk and cereal splatter across the table.

the expression on namjoon’s face is priceless, stunned and flabbergasted and one jimin would totally bust out his phone for to capture and memorialize forever and more. but considering the situation, jimin thinks it rather not so prudent to do so.

instead, he takes a haughty sip of his coffee, only if to prolong the moment just a little bit further because the tick growing upon namjoon’s temple is starting to pulse, and jimin thinks it’s kind of funny.

“he wants you to do what, exactly?” namjoon repeats, fists clenched and teeth grinding, as if jimin hadn’t heard the first time. and jimin rolls his eyes, because clearly namjoon is being overdramatic.

Keep reading

Ella’s Klaine Rec List

Alternatively Titled: Ella Makes A List of Her Favorite Klaine Fics Then Cries Forever Because She Misses Her Babies

Dear hoechlinanddylan

Congratulations on falling into my fandom. Well done. I support this endeavor wholeheartedly. Basically, what you’ll gather from this list is that I love longfics and I love AUs and I love overused tropes, so those three things show up most often on here. I found fics on AO3 when I could, scarvesandcoffee when I couldn’t, livejournal/ff.net as a last resort, and a couple that have been deleted except for PDF downloads are scattered in here as well. This is probably plenty to get you started, but just ask me if you need more or you’re looking for more specific tropes & stuff. 

In no particular order, here is Ella’s introduction to the world of Klaine fic:  

Fluff

Little Numbers by iknowitainteasy - 38K - PG-13 (barely - I would consider it PG)

Blaine sends a text message to a wrong number by accident. Things progress from there.

The first fic I ever read & set the bar for everything I ever read after - also includes a playlist for your listening pleasure

Swing Sets & Sandboxes by beautifulwhatsyourhurry - 43K - PG-13

Kurt Hummel is 7 years old. He makes a new friend, little Blaine, on the playground one day. This is their story.

*chants* kid fic! kid fic! kid fic!

Jitters by whatiknew - 29K - PG-13

Blaine Anderson gets up at 5am every day to serve coffee with Santana Lopez. And that is the easiest part of his day. As he starts his sophomore year at NYU, Blaine tries to navigate his inevitable conquering of Tisch while figuring out how to talk to the beautiful boy who’s started frequenting the coffee shop. There might be dragons involved.

The story is awesome, but what really kills me in this one is the art (done by pencilpushingenthusiast, who just so happens to be my favorite fanartist of all time)

Louder than Words - it’s not super long but I don’t know the exact number - PG

A rosy cheeked stranger walks into Kurt’s bookshop one autumn evening, and the story begins.

Stay Perfect (PDF link) by naivewaltz - PG-13

Blaine is an English major, afraid to actually talk to Kurt - because he’s way too perfect to be single, anyways. Encouraged by Wes and David, he starts putting notes into Kurt’s mailbox - handwritten copies of Shakespearean sonnets and other love poems, signed only with the initials B.A. Kurt starts writing notes back to his almost anonymous admirer, unaware that B.A. and the really cute but probably straight guy in his World History class that he stares at all of the time and follows to the library on occasion… are the same person.

AU 

Roses In December by ckofshadows - 93K & counting - R

In a cozy coffee shop in a small town, a boy with beautiful blue eyes sits at the same table every day, as if he’s waiting for something, or someone. Blaine feels strangely compelled to sit down and talk with him… and discovers the unimaginable.

This is a WIP with one chapter left until completion, but it’s absolutely perfect and thus I will add it to the list even incomplete

It’s Not Babysitting by anxioussquirrel - 89K - Explicit

Kurt Hummel is 28 and has been living in New York for ten years now. He has a good job, nice apartment and two best friends anyone could wish for: Sebastian, a snarky lawyer, and Cooper, a workaholic investment specialist. What he doesn’t have is luck in relationships. But then Blaine, Cooper’s 17-year-old brother comes to NY to spend the summer. He turns out to be gorgeous and quickly develops a huge crush on Kurt…

The best thing, in my opinion, to ever come out of the GKM. Also, Sebastian and Cooper as the best friends in this story are so perfectly written it’s not even funny. 

Interludes (and the rest of the Symphony Verse) by shandyall - 38K (417K total) - Teen+ up to Mature in later stories

Blaine has spent most of his life feeling like the only thing people notice about him is that he stutters. He’s working hard to overcome his (mostly self created) roadblocks when he meets Kurt in an online class the summer after his freshman year of college.

There’s nothing I don’t like about this verse at all except that I hardcore cry every time I read it. Bonus: it has the best OC ever written in my opinion - his name is Matt and he’s lowkey the love of my life. 

Go Your Own Way by zavocado - 188K - Explicit

Kurt Hummel just wants to get through his Junior Year at McKinley in one piece. But when the new guy from Dalton Academy Reform School for Boys takes an alarming interest in him, he’s certain he’s going to be in for a wild ride. Badboy!Blaine, Klaine, AU

This is almost 200K of angst (fair warning - it’s pretty dark) but a definite fandom staple 

20 Year Old Lover by heyblaine - it’s a whole bunch of one-shots - NC-17

AU in which 39-year-old Blaine Anderson’s life gets a lot more complicated when he meets, and additionally falls in love with, the 20 years younger intern Kurt Hummel at Vogue.com

Literary brilliance in the form of age-difference fic

The Fiddler and the Maestro by dahlstrom - 69K - Mature

Symphony AU. Kurt is the 27-year-old first violinist and concertmaster of the Oregon Symphony Orchestra in Portland. Blaine arrives in town to guest conduct their concert of Holst’s The Planets.

Hearts and Homes (PDF link) by beautifulwhatsyourhurry - 78K - M

A cold winter night finds Kurt stranded after some car trouble, only to bring him face to face with a sick, shivering, homeless boy beneath a bridge. That boy, of course, turns out to be Blaine.

Let me Count the Ways by luthien82 - 26K - Explicit

Kurt Hummel’s love life has been lukewarm at best in the last few years. Okay, let’s be honest here: it had been practically non existent. Why he agreed to twelve blind dates set up by his girl friends, he will never know (and always blame on too much alcohol). And it’s really rather inconvenient when, instead of falling in love with his dates, he’s getting more and more interested in the bartender…

My babies being oblivious & Blaine as a bartender…it’s perfect

Syrup and Honey by heartsmadeofbooks - 116K - M 

Kurt Hummel is 25 years old when he finds himself being the owner of the bakery he had been dreaming about his whole life, just in time to sweeten up Blaine Anderson’s days.

Crema by twobirdsonesong - 47K - Mature

Kurt’s just landed a job at Vogue as Carrie Bradshaw’s assistant. One of his tasks is to bring her coffee in the morning. Enter Blaine, the barista. This is the story of how they change each other’s lives.

Like half of their canon relationship revolved around a coffee shop - there’s no way there weren’t gonna be an excessive number of coffee shop AUs on this list

Life Less Ordinary by allittledizzy & savvymavvy - 140K - Explicit

Blaine’s life is privileged, fantastic, and entirely routine until he changes things up and tries out a new coffee shop, where one struggling NYADA student named Kurt Hummel happens to work.

For Better or For Worse by sotto_voice - 24K - PG to R

Kurt is an up-and-coming New York City wedding planner working on the biggest wedding of his career, and Blaine is the frontman of an unfortunately-named band from New Jersey. Booking an untested band with a distracting lead singer is either going to be the best or the worst decision that Kurt has ever made. He’s not sure which, just yet.

Two of my favorite tropes - wedding planner!kurt and band AU 

Where There’s Smoke by stoney - 88K - NC-17

Fireman AU, set 7 years after graduation. Kurt is Kurt, except that he never met Blaine Anderson. Blaine grew up in Brooklyn with his mother and firefighter father. Rachel and Kurt have graduated NYADA, Kurt gained a Masters from Tisch, and now they’re in their first post-college apartment together ready to tackle their dreams. Unfortunately, Rachel never learned how to properly cook and almost sets their new house on fire. Enter Dreamy McFirepants.

Dat fireman AU tho…you knew there has to be at least one on here

An Accidental Chance by slayerkitty - 56K - R

An accidental tweet. A chance phone call. Or what happens when famous TV star Blaine Anderson accidentally tweets his phone number.

Loosely based on an incident where Grant Gustin accidentally tweeted his phone number. There’s this story and a sequel, plus a million beautiful follow-up oneshots

Boys of Summer by whenidance - 24K - Mature

AU where Kurt and Blaine are childhood friends because each summer, their families stay in neighboring lake cabins. The summer the boys are sixteen, the Andersons don’t show, but the next year when Kurt and Blaine see each other, they’ve grown up quite a bit. They quickly discover they might be a little bit in love with one another. Good thing they have a long summer ahead of them and plenty of firsts to figure out together.

Unwanted by portraitofemmy - 27K - NC-17

Kurt’s a Dom who never wanted a sub. Blaine’s a sub who’s never been wanted. This is a story about finding the things you need in the place you least expect them.

Life is Like a Song by luthien82 - 60K - Explicit

Kurt and Blaine have been best friends since college. They would do anything for each other, which Blaine proves when Kurt confesses he has to go home for a wedding - a wedding where everyone expects him to bring his long time boyfriend. The thing is: Kurt doesn’t have one. But he has a Blaine, who is willing to help. Enter one group of crazy, well meaning friends, a week full of wedding preparations, and lots of sexual tension and you’ve got yourself a mix that’s just bound to blow up in their faces…

Fake wedding date/boyfriend - need I say more?

Bites by foxxed - 36K - M 

Kurt Hummel is a Chef de Cuisine with a tongue as sharp as his knife. But when the restaurant across the street finally opens, Kurt is confronted with an old culinary school rival - the always smiling and opera-singing Italian Chef Blaine Anderson and things are about to heat up faster than the average stove.

Pivot and Slip by alilactree - 16K - Mature 

Blaine is a former boxer still struggling with the demons of his past. Kurt is a yoga instructor who may be able to help Blaine with his pent up frustrations, and find the confidence to go after what he wants in the process.


Canon Divergent

The Wisdom of Wildflowers by the-water-nixie - 34K - NC-17

It’s been ten years since Kurt set foot in the halls of William McKinley High School, but the death of a friend has him headed back to Lima and spending time with his old friends. The week brings sorrow, reminiscences, love, and maybe the chance to mend the tears in old relationships.

Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust by aelora - 36K - R

After a bad break up with the love of his life, Blaine Anderson, his senior year of high school, Kurt Hummel had pretty much given up on dreams, and instead, focused on reality. Still, it’s kind of difficult to mock the dreams of the brides he plans weddings for, especially once he begins working for the one place where dreams are made - the Disney Weddings Group at Walt Disney World. It’s even more difficult to turn a blind eye to his own dreams when Blaine turns up portraying Disney’s hottest new character, the Swan Prince, and begins a ridiculous campaign of attempting to win Kurt back that includes castles, fireworks, fairy tales and a giant talking mouse. Blaine needs to break past the walls Kurt has built up over the last six years. Is that special Disney magic enough to prove to him that dreams really can come true?

Klaine fic set at Disneyworld with Disney prince Blaine and wedding planner Kurt…AKA everything I’ve ever wanted


Future Fic

Everyday by whatiknew - 67K - NC-17

A few days after their 2nd wedding anniversary, Kurt is in an accident and falls into a coma. Blaine struggles with the decision to let him go, and the night before they’re set to pull the plug, Kurt wakes up.
One problem: He thinks it’s 2008 and that he is 14 years old. No New Directions, no Finn and Carole, and no Blaine.
Blaine helps Kurt try to remember his old life while they consider starting a new one.

You know I’m a sucker for amnesia fics & this is truly one of the best…

Snapshots by borogroves - 142K - Mature

August 27, 2044. They say a picture paints a thousand words… and Kurt and Blaine have a whole scrapbook.

Everything I’ve ever wanted from an otp - domestic daddies Klaine whose kids are all grown up & they’re looking back on their life

Obviously, I have tons more to rec, but this should keep you afloat for now. Happy klaining! 

PS if you want to continue deep down the klaine shipping hole so far that you reach the Sebklaine fandom, I have a whole bunch of recs for that as well as what’s in my tag, if that’s something you’re into. 

3

The Walking Dead stars Andrew Lincoln, Melissa McBride and Norman Reedus will be on the cover of the August 7 issue of Entertainment Weekly, which hits newsstands this Friday. Here it is in all its glory, along with a couple of cheeky outtakes.

The issue features a first look at the shows’ upcoming sixth season, which premieres October 11 on AMC. Read on for a preview:

Keep reading

tsk tsk tsk. Sarah and Jesse are not being the best captains right now. why they’re doing this:

1) japril fans are to expect a lot of heartbreaks in the upcoming season so they prepare us for the unavoidable or
2) with these depressing tweets/retweets they’re trying to mislead us and japril in time will resolve their issues or
3) Shonda made them do it or
4) they’re sadists at heart

yo man thanks for tagging me minghahahao

Pick your artist/band: i would do seventeen but AOA (SO FUCKING PREPARED TO SEE THEM AT KCON LIKE DAMN)

“Using only song names from 1 artist/band, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people or however many people you want. Try not to repeat a song title, it’s a lot harder than you think!”

Are you a male or female: Girl’s Heart

Describe yourself: Like a Cat

How do you feel: Joa Yo!

Describe where you currently live: Under the Street Lamps

If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Fantasy

Your best friend is: Soulmate

You and your best friends are: One Thing

Favorite time of the day: Just the Two of Us

If your life was a TV show, what would the title be: Get Out

What life is to you: Chocolate

Your relationship: Heart Attack

Your fear: Tears Falling

THIS IS SO FUN jjnhong (even though i think jess tagged you), jeonghansprincess, jonghyuns-insoles, bo0seungkwan (SENPAI), w-0nwoo, seokmoo, the8soo (although you should be studying DON’T DO THIS IF YOU NEED TO STUDY), and idk whoever else wants to do this

Tawnya Lund for cookiehorse‘s BC.

Hair I Eyebrows (Miranda) I Eyeliner I Lipstick

Hi there! My name’s Tawnya Lund and I’m here for Ice’s Bachelorette Challenge!

I’m a real upbeat, bubbly sort of person. Forever an optimist. At least, that’s the way my friends describe me. I love meeting new people and going on adventures. Nothing beats a good adrenaline rush in my book. Rock climbing? Skydiving? You bet I’ll be there! I’m a daredevil, I just can’t stay away.

I’m the youngest of four siblings. My mom tries to play it off like I wasn’t a surprise but I know the truth. Being the baby of the family was a little challenging growing up. My siblings left some big shoes to fill and my parents expected a lot from us. Academics are everything in my family. They’re all geniuses, what can I say? Apparently I’m one too but the word sounds too arrogant for my tastes.

I recently graduated with my B.A. in Computer Science. It was difficult even for a computer whiz like me. As a reward I dyed my hair blue. It’s my favorite color after all. I also figured that if I was doing something to make my parents proud I may as well do something to piss them off at the same time. I’d like to think it leaves things nice and balanced.

When I’m not dying my hair all kinds of crazy colors or climbing a rock somewhere my favorite thing to do is hang out with my siblings. Family’s huge for me. I’d like a football team of my own one day if I can find the right woman. I’d like to think I’m close with all my siblings but there is some tension with my older sister Mimi. She’s the real artsy type and no matter how hard I try I just don’t get it. I can’t stand art.

By far though I’m closest with my brother Dameon, though. You’ve probably seen him before. He competed on Vincent’s Bachelor Challenge. He failed spectacularly! I still tease him about it.

He tried to talk me out of signing up for this but once I put my mind to something…well, I can be a little stubborn. Plus, the thought of competing in challenges and meeting someone as lovely as Ice had me signing up before I could even think about what I was doing. So I hope that I can redeem the Lund name! Or if I’m going to fail I hope I can do it in a bigger way than Dameon.

We may be close but sibling rivalries run deep.

My dick arrived!

I ordered a Mr Limpy (5.5 inches) two days ago and it arrived this morning, which was pretty good postage. I had watched a few reviews online but that is nothing compared to the real thing. It feels a lot more firm (not to say it’s hard- just not as ridiculously squishy as I expected) and looks a lot more realistic than the pictures/reviews led me to believe. It is cut, which is actually something I’m glad for (don’t ask me to rationalise that I can’t work out why for myself) and there’s a few veins. The head/main vein down the underside are mad detailed, too, which is great. The balls are a bit smaller than I expected but look very realistic so I’m not bothered. I knew how big five and a half inches are, but in terms of the actual dick, it was sort of surprising. I suppose I didn’t take girth into account. Through a pair of boxers it feels like the real deal. I’m still getting used to actually using it and how to position it in a pair of boxers. It is rather front-heavy (obviously) so getting it not to weigh itself down and come loose is a struggle, but I’ll get there. The first thing I noticed was how bloody cold it is! Takes a long while to not be super freezing and uncomfortable, but again it’ll just take a little getting used to. I can’t stop fiddling with it, but I’m really bloody happy. Sorry to anyone who is getting surprise dick pics! 

m-night-shyamalayam asked:

I started following you because I saw your selfie and was like "damn he's too hot (hot damn) i better call the police and the fireman. I bet he makes a dragon wanna retire man" and thats why i started following you Just kidding its because of the demonic sacrifice made to the squid lord

Wait my sacrifice to him, or your sacrifice to him? Cause I was expecting a lot more calamari if we’re being honest :P