Disability doesn't come with extra time and energy

I’ve heard a lot of advocates of inclusion say things like “kids with disabilities work twice as hard as everyone else” or “my employees with Down’s syndrome never come in late or take a day off.”

This sounds like praise, but it isn’t.

The time disabled people spend working twice as hard as everyone else has to come from somewhere.

There are reasons why kids aren’t in school every waking moment. There is a reason why vacation time exists and why it’s normal to be late occasionally.

People need rest. People need leisure time. People have lives and needs and can’t do everything.

Being disabled doesn’t erase the need for down time. Being disabled doesn’t erase the need for play, or for connections to other people.

Working twice as hard as everyone else all the time isn’t sustainable. Praising disabled people for doing unsustainable things is profoundly destructive.

People with disabilities should not have to give up on rest, recreation, and relationships in order to be valued. We have limited time and energy just like everyone else, and our limitations need to be respected.

It is not right to expect us to run ourselves into the ground pretending to be normal. We have the right to exist in the world as we really are.

Donald Trump dropped out of Saudi Arabia event because he was 'exhausted'
Ivanka Trump subs in for him twice in a week.

Donald Trump was “exhausted” during his first trip overseas as President and asked his daughter to attend a scheduled event in his place.

Ivanka Trump spoke at the “tweeps” youth forum in Riyadh, an event to discuss combating extremism on social media, instead of her father after a long day for the President of meetings, conferences and speeches.

Mr Trump abruptly skipped the event on the second day of his trip in Saudi Arabia and the day before he was due to meet with Israeli leaders to negotiate a peace process with Palestine.

A White House official was asked by reporters why Mr Trump had deviated from his prepared speech earlier that day to Muslim leaders about fighting Islamist terrorism.

“Just an exhausted guy,” she replied.

On the stage of the youth forum in the evening, Fox News anchor Bret Baier announced that the President would not attend the event, but there would be a “surprise guest” - his daughter.

Ms Trump gave a three-minute speech in his place, thanking the Saudi royals for their hospitality.

“Social media is an incredibly powerful tool which empowers the people,” she said.

It was the second time in a week that the 35-year-old had stepped in to replace the President, after leading a White House meeting on human trafficking with members of Congress while her father was giving a commencement address for the US Coast Guard Academy.

Over the weekend, Mr Trump received the highest civilian honour in Saudi Arabia and bowed while he received it. His daughter and wife, Ivanka and Melania Trump, did not wear headscarves during the trip. He previously attacked former President Barack Obama for similar displays.

He also attacked his former rival for the White House, Hillary Clinton, for her “lack of stamina” when footage captured her being assisted into a car after a lengthy 9/11 memorial ceremony during a hot day in New York.

Are you shitting me right now?  His first international trip, what, 3 days in?  His people are trying to push him as a “foreign affairs” President to emphasize his deal-making, intelligence, and to distract from domestic issues where he’s been flopping around, failing, and self-incriminating for months now.

And 3 days into his very first international trip he just cancels meetings and events because he’s too tired?  Whatever happened to the “healthiest man in the world” or whatever bullshit was on that doctor’s note?

When you have BPD, you have to exert at least 10x more effort than nt’s to be “sociable” and come off as normal as possible. Most of us are required to fit in as much as possible with society so we can keep our jobs. No one wants to hire the person who’s mood changes on a dime.

And you know what? That shit is fucking exhausting. I sit at a desk all day but when I get home I am completely drained. Putting forth so much mental energy every single day really takes it out of you.

A lot of people don’t understand that. I’ve been called “lazy” my entire life because I get so exhausted from faking it all day.

I wish people could walk a day in my shoes. I bet they wouldn’t call me lazy anymore.

@ people who suffer from chronic fatigue

youre not lazy, youve got an illness that constantly exhausts you and makes it feel as if you never sleep enough.

youre not lazy, youve got an illness that makes doing alot of normal and daily tasks difficult and tiring

youre not lazy, youve got an illness that causes you to tire out quickly, dont be ashamed to take your time doing things because having no energy makes doing anything and everything harder

youre not lazy, youve got an illness that makes it feel like your batteries are always running on empty, to the point where getting up can feel like you ran a mile. do not be ashamed of your limits or illness.


because you are not lazy, youve got an illness.

I am tired. Not for a lack of rest, no, I slept quite well last night, and I’ve had my coffee. It’s something deeper, something inherently present, in the fibers of my skin, in my tendons, in my eyes.

I am exhausted, fatigued by life, by the noise and the silence, the people, and the empty rooms, the light and dark; by hope and despair. So worn down by the world that nothing in it can refresh my mind from the constant buzzing. I am tired, and there are not enough hours in the night for the type of rest I need.
—  Unknown

It’s okay to say no to anything. You don’t need a valid reason, you don’t need to explain yourself. You can say no and let that be the end.

I’m afraid to have downtime because that’s when I start to think. And when I start to think, well, I start to hate everything. Downtime makes me sick with worry and frustration. At least when I’m working myself to exhaustion I don’t have time to think about everything that is wrong.
—  KJS // Excerpt from the book I’ll never write #79