I just wrote a Sorting Hat song for a new fic I’m starting, and… Oh man! It wasn’t easy, hahaha. Is this horrible?
There was a tense moment of silence. Then the seam along the brim of the hat opened like a mouth…and it began to sing.
‘I know I’m not that handsome,
But don’t be fooled by my appearance,
If you want to know where you belong,
I’m the cap to give you clearance.
There’s not a single thought that I can’t read,
Nor a trait that I can’t see,
So try me on, don’t be afraid,
And I’ll sort you easily.
Perhaps you’ll be in Gryffindor,
Where the bold and brave all dwell,
Those with daring and chivalry
In Gryffindor do well.
Or perhaps you’re meant for Hufflepuff,
Where dwell the loyal and the true.
For those who are hard-working,
Hufflepuff shall be for you.
Though Ravenclaw may be your home,
If you’ve a sharp and ready mind,
Those Ravenclaws are perceptive folk,
There’s not an answer they can’t find.
Or maybe Slytherin will be where
You find that you fit in,
Those of clever, cunning, and quickest wit,
Will do best in Slytherin.
So don’t be afraid to put me on!
There’s worse things to fear than that!
I am the best (though I’ve no competition),
The one, the only—Sorting Hat!