except for the shoes

anonymous asked:

Pique/Ramos shoes

Once when the whole spain team was in line walking into security at the airport, Sergio was behind pique and kept stepping on the back of his shoes so that the heels slipped off. And pique kept turning around, shooting Sergio looks and pulling them back on. Yelled once even, for Sergio to fuck off.

And when they finally reached their turn, they had to take their shoes off. Everyone had been prepared except for pique who had dirty looks thrown at him for taking so long. Sergio had shrugged and smiled. “I tried to warn you but you just got mad.”

Captain America: Civil War – the We Are All Rational Adults Version

(The more I think about Civil War the more annoyed I get)

Tony: okay so these Accords

Tony: obviously the fact we’ve only just heard of them and they’re being signed in 3 days and they’re fatter than all of us is some shit

Steve: language

Tony: but the fact is, we can’t just run around wherever we want punching people that we personally decide are bad guys

Tony: countries have the right to make their own laws and we can’t just ignore them because we’re really cool

Tony: (though we are)

Tony: anyway the fact is nobody actually voted for you to be President of Avengerdonia, steve, so we should like, obey the people we elected, like everyone else in the world does, this is how democracy works

Sam: i would vote for steve

Steve: i will be honest here

Steve: i have very much enjoyed being in charge with no restrictions

Steve: it has been very efficient and we’ve saved loads of lives (like loads)

Steve: however as i am not in fact a massive jerkhole dictator and i do believe in democracy

Steve: you are of course right we should get the nod from the government before we crash in anywhere to save the day, as long as that can be done quickly and effectively, and won’t mean that i’m completely banned from saving people

Steve: (because i have zero impulse control when it comes to saving people i just do it)

Tony: oh we know

Sam: everyone else would vote for steve too right natasha you’d vote for steve

Natasha:  no comment

Steve: i mean there are a couple of other things i want to talk about in these papers

Wanda: like the fact we’re not actually accountable for the actions of all supervillains everywhere?

Steve: yeah and the fact that it doesn’t specify that we can’t be thrown in a monstrous sea-jail without a trial or lawyers if we damage property while defending ourselves

Tony: wow steve we’re (mostly) US citizens do you really think we need to specify that?

Steve: i’ve read about ross

Steve: yes we do

Tony: okay then, how about we sit here and hash out our list of amendments and caveats, which they really should have consulted us about more than three days before they meet to sign this document that controls our lives, and we take our improved accords to vienna and talk about it there?

Steve: that sounds really sensible

Sam: wanda you vote for steve too right

Bucky: i do not vote for steve. i vote for anyone except steve. i vote for tony stank’s left shoe, because it is far less reckless than steve

Sam: dude you’re not even in this part of the movie yet

Bucky: i showed up early just to say don’t vote for steve

Tony: holy shit it’s the winter soldier

Bucky: ooooh steve doesn’t like that kind of language you know

Steve: go away and wait for your appropriate plot hook barnes what is this

fin

3

i actually could not stop thinking about this……..

I quite liked today’s outfit, which is a surprise because it was a “I have 10 minutes to get ready and really can’t be bothered with anything” situation. Literally just threw on a few random things from my closet, stuck on some red lipstick and not a scrap else, and that was me done haha. Everything I’m wearing except for the bag (Banned Apparel) and the shoes (Demonia Footwear) came from eBay and was almost definitely less than £15 each~

CLOTHING FOR DISABLED PPL UPDATE so I’m in the process of moving but by June 10th I will have available:

  • a weighted vest with a chewable drawstring and a hood. v deep BIG (fit an ipad inside) sized pockets with fringes inside. you can chose to close it with big snaps or a zipper. lots of space in the armpit. the trim and hood will be a different color/pattern than the main, and you’ll be able to buy many different colors or sizes. 
  • all these come in every size. it’s priced by size and thin ppl have to pay too
  • trim and sleeves will all be in different colors
  • everything will come in space/plant or plain designs
  • all the pockets can fit an ipad mini in them and will have fringes inside for stimming
  • all fabric sensory safe and approved by my v sensory conscious butt
  • a cropped jacket with a chewable drawstring and a hood. also huge pockets. big snaps or a zipper to close. fleece lined sleeves. sleeves, hood, trim all different colors. many different colors and sizes
  • late 1960s-type sleeveless tent dress with the same giant pockets, and one small breast pocket for cash. neckline will be a small collar that isn’t tight. zipper down the back. many colors and sizes
  • a cropped tank top/undershirt with a medium scoop neck. cap sleeves and trim in a different color. 
  • a big oversized long t shirt with a zipper down the back. a small scoop neck that isn’t tight. 8 inch sleeves that are huge. giant pockets, again. many colors and sizes.
  • cropper long-sleeve shirt with 17 inch sleeves and a large scoop neck. sleeves and trim in a different pattern. more many colors and sizes.
  • cropped, highwaisted, big-pocket “men’s style” sweatpants with kind of fitted but not tight pant’s legs. many colors.
  • drawstring shorts that are just big and comfy with huge pockets. lots of colors.
  • just above the knee godete skirt with optimum “look pretty when spinning”ness. same with lots of colors and big pockets
  • SHOES that are breathable. hard to describe but they’re similar to a high top converse except they’re buttoned over with snaps so you don’t have to tie your shoes bc tbh i can’t tie mine
  • also totally willing to accommodate any disabilities if ppl need things changed including adding a zipper down the back of things so wheelchair bound friends can put them on

right now i have 

noise muffling beanies/headphones in plain, plant/space designs

soft jewelry, which is a sensory friendly and cute necklace/bracelet that comes in many patterns and colors.

etsy link

Scott: Hey my shirt is stuck in my zipper, do you have some scissors I could use?
Ramona: Sure, just don’t stab yourself
Scott: I’m not going to stab myself!
*10 seconds later*
Scott: So I stabbed myself

so you know how there’s always a character who’s asked to like hand over their weapons and they hand over one and the person is like “all of them”

keith is definitely that person. someone asks him to hand over all his weapons and he gives them one of his knives, and then they say “all of them” and so he reluctantly hands over like 5 more and they have to ask a few more times before he finally hands them all over except

“and take off ur shoes” they say when all his knives are handed over, bc he has shoes with knives that’ll come out in the front

anyway he takes off his shoes and the person thinks he’s knifeless but jokes on them because keith hides tiny knives in his gloves

If Marinette and Adrien had "Sander Sides"
  • (For Marinette)
  • Morality: "I think everyone should be treated equally! Except fUCKING CHLOE THAT LITTLE BITC—"
  • Creativity: "Uh-uh, that shirt with THOSE shoes??"
  • Anxiety: "ADRIEN WILL NEVER LOVE YOU AND YOU'LL NEVER GO ON THAT MOVIE THEATRE DATE TOGETHER, OBVIOUSLY THE BEST WAY TO SOLVE THIS IS TO STEAL HIS PHONE????"
  • Logic: "The proper way to talk to Adrien is to simply be able to control your emotions around him and speak clearly so-"
  • Mari: *fucks something up*
  • Logic: *breathe in* bOI
  • (For Adrien)
  • Morality: "MAN, MY PUNS ARE PURRIFIC! THEY'RE TOTALLY CLAWSOME! AMEOWZING! HAHA!"
  • Depression: "Ladybug sees you as just a partner and will never love you back just like your father who uses you as a trophy, you're not actually talented in anything you're just forced to learn piano and mandarin when really those are simple things anyone can do..."
  • Adrien: ...
  • Depression: "Btw your mom is gone."
  • Adrien: *sobs*
  • Logic: "If we use the information gathered from the many episodes of various T.V shows, movies and animes, we should be able to flirt with 100% chance of success."
  • *Ladybug rejects him*
  • Logic: "I don't need sleep, I neED ANSWERS."
  • Creativity: *sits in the corner waiting for his time to shine*
  • *In the meantime takes selfies*
10

The Prince Eric & Cinderella -Lily James & Jai Courtney

And Cinderella went to Prince Eric’s dance, leader of the Dauntless.
The silent herald could not even announce her presence. For her crystal shoes slipped down the stairs like light rose petals of roses.

Cinderella greeted Eric from the stairs courteously.

The cruel prince Eric was tired of receiving hundreds of maidens who came to ask for his hand, but when she arrived, even though he wanted to scream in her face how much her presence angered him, he was tired of being displayed as a trophy of war of his father, the king, could not avoid to admire the sweet expression of Cinderella.

She had a magical effect on him. Beside her, the Eric´s  cruelty simply did not disappear but fell asleep. Cinderella knew it when he approached her as hypnotized & touched her hand. 

Then the music enveloped them both.
They danced more than three pieces, missing Eric’s blue eyes in Cinderella’s brown eyes, as if to embrace them.

But the one he hugged and kissed passionately went to her, as he dragged her to the great chamber next door and held her fiercely,  while Cinderella felt  as her  china skin melted at each kiss of Eric’s soft lips.

Only the clock stopped their ecstasy, when the twelve bells rang. Cinderella in the broken dress left, ignoring Eric’s pleas:
“Wait, wait, where can I find you?”

Only a glass shoe remained on the stairs, which Eric picked up.
By royal edict all the young men of the kingdom appeared before the prince, who finally found Cinderella.
When he tried on the shoe, they both knew. Cinderella smiled happily.
He never thought that such happiness was possible.

Global Cyber-Attacks: What You Don’t Need To Know

Numerous news sources are reporting the facts you need to know about the recent global cyber-attacks. But few are reporting the facts you don’t need. We at FIJMU will rectify this situation now.

  • The cyber-attacks originated on a computer with several blue sharpie stains on its case.
  • Few if any violins were infected by the ransomware virus.
  • There is a 63% likelihood that at least one of the programmers involved wears glasses.
  • They may also have been wearing socks -and only socks- at the time.
  • As in no shoes not as in they were naked except for socks.
  • Though that would’ve been funny.
  • Several infected computers in Paris contained illegal copies of Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s excellent film “Delicatessen.”
  • No llamas have been infected, because this is a computer virus and llamas are not technically computers.
  • The background to the virus pay screen is taken from the Sandra Bullock movie “The Net.”
  • The word “Virus” shares a root word with the word “Citrus.”
  • The key to unlocking any infected computer without paying is 12775.
  • Robert Downey Jr.’s computers do not yet have the virus.

this outfit is totally unremarkable except for the shoes, which allow you to see clearly where I’ve written “bitch” on my foot in henna