ex slave


please remember that fiona, ex-slave, ex-grey warden, grand enchanter, leader of the mage rebellion, the legend who said ‘fuck the divine’, lover of king maric, friend of duncan, rival of wynne, mother of the king, and the only grey warden ever to be cured of the taint exists

go wild, you’re good

Luke and Leia were both adopted by a childless couple. They were both raised with love, but Beru & Owen were “aunt” and “uncle,” while Breha & Bail were “mom” and “dad.” What accounts for the difference?

As Queen and Vice-Roy of Alderaan, the Organa’s weren’t just adopting a daughter, they were adopting an heir. Leia had to be their legal daughter in order to inherit the thrown. Everyone knew she was adopted, but being their daughter also reduced the number of questions asked about their origins and provided her with a certain amount of political cover. Outside of political considerations, the Organas had a long history of infertility and miscarriages. They wanted a baby. They wanted a baby so very badly and Leia filled that want.

By contrast, the Lars were just starting out in their marriage. They probably thought they would have children of their own someday and didn’t have the same emotional need for a son. They, especially Owen, had sentimental feelings about the name Skywalker thanks to Shmi and didn’t want it to die. Unlike the Organas, they weren’t in the public eye and had no reason to conceal Luke’s origins. As far as anyone on Tatooine knew, Luke was the son of an ex-slave who left and never came back. They had nothing to be afraid of.

When I was eight, I got baptised. I remember my mom telling me she was so proud of the choice I made. But when I turned 13, I remember telling her I didn’t want to attend church any more. She told me I was too young to make a decision like that. I realized then that I only had the illusion of choice. If it wasn’t in the confines of my parents beliefs, then it didn’t exist.

in da2 there’s a banter between varric and fenris where they talk about the money fenris owes and whether he’ll come by the tavern for wicked grace later, and he says ‘never miss it’ and i got reAL fuckin weepy out of nowhere. it’s such a normal sitcom conversation and you wouldn’t normally think anything of it in a game full of Serious Character Development but it’s fenris getting to choose who and what he spends his time on and he sounds so settled and happy, he has friends and he has his own place (sortof) and he has hawke, he made a life where he gets to choose every single aspect of it, and he chooses to have a nice night out at a bar with friends. he has a reputation for being a grumpy loner but i think he was a loner by necessity, not innate character.

his character arc in this game fkcing kills my ass. he started out a fugitive ex-slave on the run, who had suffered abuses and a desperate pursuit for years, alone, ends with his freedom, surrounded by a circle of friends who love him, some time to have a little normal in his life, a little peace. or as much as anyone in hawke’s inner circle can have.

This morning I was self-soothing down from a panic attack and I used all of my tools (positive self-talk, swaying, balancing, conscious breaths, putting my legs up the wall, environment awareness). I’m my own best expert when it comes to my body and panic attacks, and as I gain experience I feel more and more mental control over my state when I have my symptoms, even if my body continues to have its episode.

It got me thinking about Solas and how he calms the Inquisitor and Cole, saying all the right things when they panic. He recites a practically perfect script for soothing symptoms. How does he know what to say? Is he just a kind man, an empathetic person who has a sense for the right words? Or it might be that he came to know many ex-slaves who experienced panic attacks, and sought knowledge of how to best respond. 

Then it made me sad to remember that Solas’s expertise might have been earned through personal experience.

Fen’Harel is said to have spent centuries in a far corner of the earth after his great deception, hugging himself and giggling madly in glee. 


It’s only a legend. But I’m thinking about Solas after he’s trapped the gods away and he’s still mourning Mythal’s death. A wandering dreamer comes across him in the Fade. Solas is hugging himself, rocking back and forth, making gasping, choked noises.

The Dread Wolf is laughing over his victory, spreads the legend.

Solas feels like his lungs are collapsing. His eyes hurt so much, he doesn’t know how long it’s been since he was able to move his arms from their rigid grip but his hands are aching and stiff. He stopped thinking a long time ago, but his thoughts before his mind blacked out were all vicious and scared, and those sensations of self-loathing linger; he wonders if this is the end, and wonders if that is for the best. But it never is. And he hates how he has time to recover between the waves. He thinks in these moments when his mind is clear: are you trying to prove something with this pathetic display? Then the next wave hits, and he can’t control the way his legs kick out or how his heart feels like exploding.

I feel like he slowly realizes that these episodes are a product of an instinctive defense of his body and mind. One which hurts more than helps, and one which can be approached, observed, and soothed. The immortal scholar labors over centuries to do just that. He becomes his own best expert. And then when he wakes, and when his friends can’t breathe, he does his best to help them manage, and help them heal.

Okay a note to Black American women after they go natural. You are all queens no matter what—you do not have to go trace your African Roots to be considered an “African Queen”. you are a black queen, you’ve been a black queen and you will always be a black queen.

I say this because sometimes, you won’t be able to trace/find your roots. sometimes when you try to trace your roots, you’ll be met with hostility from the culture/heritage you’re trying to connect with. you’ll be called and told awful things (ex: “cotton picker”, “slave”, “you aren’t african–you’re just pretending”), that will make you question your worth as a black person and make you ashamed of trying to find your roots and of being something or someone you can’t control. for black women who are trying to “reconnect” this can be hurtful because we’re faced with a loss or lack of identity. But that’s not true, you are worth so much. So for any black american woman who has gone through that, i just want you to know that you are STILL a queen. You have always BEEN a queen. Just because you can’t find your roots, or you are denied your roots, you ARE a BLACK QUEEN. And nothing can take that away from you. 

no but hear me out

the thing I love about hawke is that s/he has literally zero contextually respectable romance options. 

like, okay: as the warden, you’ve got a choice between an apostate mage (scandalous), an elven former assassin (sorta scandalous), a former chantry sister (borderline) and a grey warden slash royal bastard (respectable), and as the inquisitor, you’ve got a slew of options that run the gamut from utterly scandalous (qunari mercenary, tevinter altus) to completely respectable (antivan ambassador, ex-templar commander). and I mean, of course there’s always going to be differences of opinion, but generally speaking, in terms of the friends and authority figures you encounter in both games, you’ve always got an option that won’t really rock the boat, or which you can imagine the rest of the world kinda being surprised by, but then shrugging about, because it doesn’t really have much impact on what’s happening to them.

and then there’s hawke, who - in a city on the bloody brink of war between mages and templars, where literally everything related to magic is political as hell, and where the biggest external threats are qunari, tevinter slavers and pirates - is romantically interested in:

- an apostate mage possessed by a spirit who’s actively inciting rebellion against the government;

- an elven blood-mage whose forbidden experiments pissed off even her own, more magically tolerant people; 

- a qunari-sympathising elven ex-slave from tevinter squatting illegally in a decaying mansion who vocally hates pretty much everything to do with magic, even though he’s got lyrium carved into his actual skin; and/or

- a pirate who’s single-handedly responsible for infesting the city with the same qunari who end up setting the joint on fire and killing the goddamn viscount.

and I just. as grateful as the citizens of kirkwall are to their champion, you can honestly imagine that, whenever the topic of his/her lover comes up, there’s this collective groan of hawke, what the actual fuck? like REALLY? you have basically the ENTIRE ELIGIBLE POPULATION (and a significant portion of the ineligible population) ready and willing to go, and THAT’S who you’re boning?

basically hawke’s lovelife is the reason why varric drinks.

Summer Reading List

@siancore thanks for the tag. This is so hard. I’m reading so much to make up for the unendurably long wait for the new season and more Richonne. Let’s see…I’m currently enjoying:

-The Art of Control by @avintagekiss24

Rick and Michonne involved in a bit of Dom and Submissive relationship a la 50 Shades of Black. It’s got me on the edge of my seat. And added bonus, Maggie is absolutely delicious in this story.

-Sirens of the ZA by @isisnicole

Michonne and her sisters find a trapped Carl and rescue and raise him. Michonne and Rick meet and well the enemies to friends to hopefully lovers trope begins. There are plenty of fireworks so far. And my girl and her sisters are fierce.

-Cross My Heart by @bigunknownkingdom

Michonne’s an outlaw, ex-slave searching out the killer of her son and meets small- town sheriff Rick Grimes along the way. I love Westerns so this little ditty is quite fulfilling.

-Palm Trees by @cake-by-thepound

Rick and Michonne finally get to resolve twenty years of longing for each other while on a tropical island. Could it get any better?

-Machine Heart by @kendrawriter

Taking bits and pieces of my sci-fi favorites such as The Terminator and The Matrix then mixing in Richonne. It’s a dream come true. I’m biting my nail for the next installment.

-Married at First Sight by @love.devil.movies.baby

Rick and Michonne in an arranged marriage during the ZA…enough said. To read it is to love it.

I’m waiting patiently for an update to my favorite fic:

-Red Dirt Road by @siancore

AU teenage Rick and Michonne fall for each other along a Georgia red dirt road and navigate the ups and downs of young love. I am absolutely in love with this story.

I’m tagging @terriodessa, @mcheffer, and @yellehughes to keep this summer reading list going.

Originally posted by sprmint-bkgsoda

The Loyalist and African American Escape from Yorktown

On the 19th of October 1781, Washington won his most famous victory following the capitulation of the Crown Forces garrisoning Yorktown, Virginia. For Earl Charles Cornwallis and his fellow officers, defeat meant bitter embarrassment and shame. For their British and Hessian soldiers it meant the same, coupled with the potential of spending the rest of the war in the miserable conditions of an American prison camp. For the Loyalists and African Americans, however, the defeat spelled the potential for death or enslavement. 

Cornwallis was well aware of this, and sought immunity for Loyalists as part of the tenth article of capitulation. Washington refused this article, leaving Cornwallis with no choice other than to abandon formal attempts to negotiate his allies to safety. The British, however, did not give up on more clandestine means of escape. Washington permitted that a single British sloop, the Bonetta, be allowed to sail to British-held New York without being searched, for the purpose of carrying dispatches. Numerous African Americans and Loyalists were smuggled onboard. The ruse was almost discovered where a Patriot commander, General Nelson, demanded he be allowed to inspect the sloop for blacks and “enemies of the state.” Nelson’s French allies, however, insisted that he adhere to the articles of capitulation, and let the sloop go. It reached New York safely, though “guards were placed along the shore to prevent runaways from escaping to the ship, although it was feared many were already hidden onboard.” The Governor of Virginia also wrote angrily to Cornwallis, claiming ‘negroes are attempting to escape by getting onboard the Bonetta… [where] they will endeavour to lie concealed from your lordship until the vessel sails.’ It is not known if Cornwallis ever replied. Washington himself was only able to recover two of the slaves who had fled his plantation. 

The British also hit upon another ingenious means of smuggling ex-slaves to freedom. Under the articles, officer’s servants were not to be separated from their masters, and were allowed to travel with them on parole, and subsequent freedom. An eyewitness recorded that the ships bearing the British officers were “packed together, with two servants to each officer.” Another commented on fifty men and women “whose faces were hidden” - Americans who had deserted the Revolutionary cause, and knew they faced the potential of execution if caught. 

Cornwallis was known to have 4000 or 5000 black recruits at Yorktown and Portsmouth. Smallpox killed about sixty percent of those that caught the disease, but in this case some were inoculated against it, so perhaps half the runaways were spared, though wounds and typhus also took a huge toll. Maybe 2000 survived. It is impossible to establish what happened to them. A proportion of the survivors, perhaps half, must have been forced back into slavery.

Reasons The Clone Wars movie is amazing Part One:

- KitPlo interaction in the opening roll ( @sithshenanigans )
-tiny baby Ahsoka
-Obi-Wan’s soft, “I’m talking to a padawan” voice
-“youngling” “Little One”
-Rex’s laugh
-Ashoka’s sass
-Rex’s “For fucks sakes General look”
-Lots of Obi-Wan Rex interaction
-that one randomly extremely Scottish Separatist general
-Just, Obi-Wan Kenobi
-Yoda is like Gandalf, Obi-Wan. He arrives precisely when he means too.
-Oh yes, let’s just send the ex-Hutt slave to help Jabba the Hutt. That'ssss smart.

Ravager Whump

Me: *starts a fic where Nightmares and PTSD ex-slave Yondu uses drinking and fight clubs as a sad kind of therapy, upsetting Krags*

Me: wow this isn’t very healthy. Let’s start something else

Me: *starts a fic with an OC that both Kraglin and Yondu are weirdly close to with every intention of killing that OC off to contribute to their Jaded Grump Life*

Me: um. Still not very…..

Me: *plots out a fic where a shape-shifting species of assassins and saboteurs is hired to go after Yondu. They kidnap and torture Kraglin to get to him, and a shapeshifter poses as Krags to get close to Yondu. This imposter uses their relationship to get close to, and abuse Yondu in all the ways he’s been traumatized most. They later find out what happened but it’s too late and their relationship is damaged forever*

Me: I…. I do not think I am capable of fluff. I think torture and feels punching is all I have


One of his ex-slaves, Isaac, emphasized his erect posture. “Mr Jefferson was a tall, straight-bodied man as ever you see,” he recalled. “Nary a man in this town walked so straight.” Bacon agreed that Jefferson was “straight as a gun barrell.” But others, mostly enemies, described him as loosely jointed and seemingly collapsible, all wrists, elbows, and ankles. The discrepancy might have been a function of different postures. On his feet he was square-shouldered and formal. He bowed to everyone he met and tended to stand with his arms folded across his chest, defining his own private space and warding off intruders. When seated, however, he seemed to melt into the upholstery with a kind of contorted grace, one hip high, the other low, shoulders slouched and uneven, his torso folded in several places, part jackknife and part accordion.

American Sphinx: The Character of Thomas Jefferson, Joseph J. Ellis

Isabela has some sensitivity issues with Fenris but I think she was probably invaluable in making him feel like an equal among the Kirkwall gang. I would imagine that most of them are at least a little taken aback by him, or treat him delicately—an ex-slave whose memories were erased, who was branded with lyrium—but I get the sense Isabela would just barge straight past all that and treat him like any other sellsword, and in doing so encouraging him to participate in friendly conversation of the kind that gets passed around a table for hours with plenty of laughs. 

Basically she helps him normalize and I feel like that’s a pretty big deal.