eww this is ugly

No Room for Rumors

The whispering stops when
I enter the room.
Don’t people have better things
To talk about?
Like current events; the most recent
Mega chain grand opening;
The latest box office draw;
What’s new on Netflix;
The weather?

But people much prefer to talk
About other people…and
Fact-checking? Who has time for that?
Empathy? Doesn’t that, like,
Have to do with ambassadors or something?

Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes?
Eww, but what if they have,
Like, a fungus? Or they have really
Ugly, out of style shoes?

Chill out, Literal Lisa.
Hold on now, Meddling Melanie.
Take a step back and consider
The bigger picture, Gossip Queen Christine.

Instead of taking bits and pieces
You hear (which have likely been
Grossly distorted anyway)
And adding to it until
You have an intriguing story
(However far from true),
How about you stick to things
You actually know?
Like the calories in the Frappucino du jour;
Or the best salons in town;
Or the lyrics to every Adele song.
What? I’m making assumptions?
Well, at least those assumptions
Aren’t hateful digs that drag
Your character through the mud
Like the things you say about me.

Overlooked Efforts | Oh Sehun

GenreFluff, Angst

Word Count1.6k

Summary - In which you claim to be not jealous of Sehun’s new study accomplice, deciding to make him jealous in revenge. Well that ends well…


Harry Potter AU



It was a fine afternoon I spent strolling through the halls, midst conversation with Chanyeol as we walked towards the library. After stopping in front of the huge pair of double doors, we were immediately told not to enter by a very suspicious looking Baekhyun.

“You can’t go in” He shrieked as I tried to push past him

“Umm yes I can, and frankly I’m a bit late so I have to go in like now” I admitted, already being worried about the diva strop Sehun was going to throw when I entered late to our study session. I’d already told him to halt his quiditch practices for this, so I couldn’t make myself seem more unpleasant as to show up late to my own given time.

“Just take my word for it and go in some other time. I don’t want to see you hurt” Baekhyun suggested, making me more confused about his antics than I usually was anyway. I tried to look into the large room for any possible clues, but he’d placed his arms across

“Baek what are you talking about? I’m getting late for my study session with Sehun, and he really doesn’t like it when I’m late” I rushed

“You can’t go in because… He has someone else with him in your spot!” He blurted

“Under the staircase? Is it one of his quiditch teammates again? Cause I’ve told hi-” I began to fume

“It’s a girl…” Baekhyun ended, cowering behind Chanyeol as soon as the words left his mouth.

“W-what? Who is she?” I tried to keep my calm

“Siena from Ravenclaw, I heard them talk about her being his tutor for a while now” He nervously informed

“Oh her! She’s hot” Chanyeol decided to pipe up, and I instantly shot him a death glare

“Hot as in… She needs to uh - cool off with all that ugliness! Eww” He changed, mirroring Baekhyun’s nervous look.

“I just don’t know why he’d pick her over me” I huffed, looking over and trying to spot the two. I sucked in a short breath when I saw the giggly pair stumbling out from behind the large bookshelves. As soon as Sehun spotted me standing with Chanyeol, the grin on his face turned upside down; his attention momentarily with me before he went back to his preferred friend. “Put your arm around me” I muttered to Chanyeol

“What?” His eyes widened at my sudden request

“Put. Your. Arm. Around. Me” I enunciated as he shook his head.

“Y/N I don’t think this is a good- Never mind” Baekhyun gave up as I grabbed Chanyeol’s arm and put it around my shoulder. I spotted Sehun’s glare at the corner of my eye, and a satisfied smile took over my face.

“Y/N what do you think you’re going to get out of this?” Chanyeol sighed as he pulled me closer. Him being my best friend meant that this kind of skin ship was a usual. But I knew he felt uncomfortable when he found that it had another purpose.

“I’m not entirely sure, but I think it’s working” I nervously admitted, turning to grin at him. “Look I’m sorry, but I don’t know what happened. I don’t know… Why I did that” I shook my head

“Is there a chance you may be, I don’t know… Jealous?” Baekhyun wiggled his eyebrows

“I am not!” I snapped, pulling Chanyeol’s arm closer around me. Okay maybe I was a little annoyed, but certainly not jealous. I began to play extended the sleeve of his robe as an act of innocence, but the two continued to give me their suggestive stares.

“Y/N you’re gonna break my arm” Chanyeol warned as he chuckled at my sudden aggressive attitude. “You know you’re kind of hot when you’re jealous” He drawled, lowering down to place a small peck on my cheek.

“Hmm… Put a sock in it Park, he can’t hear you” I chided, kissing his cheek and walking over to the shelves.

I was walking through the rows in search for the basic Hexes spell book, when I heard a familiar voice clear his throat beside me

“So what’s up with you and Chanyeol out there?” Sehun asked, leaning against the shelves as I nonchalantly continued my search for the book.

“A more valid question would be: why do you care?” I replied with a question, tilting my head at his sudden curiosity

“Hmm I don’t know… Maybe it’s the fact that you two strictly claim to be ‘just friends’, but then all of a sudden you act all couple of the year, cuddling and kissing” He accused, causing me to let out a little chuckle at his not-so-subtle sign of jealously. But that would be pointless obviously; he has his own lady to worry about, why would he be jealous of the thought of me with another guy?

“We’re just being friendly” I shrugged, my answer being an instant cue to roll his eyes

“Yeah okay… Because all friendships consist of constant pecks on the cheeks, him wrapping his arms around you every five seconds and you curling up into his chest ever so often. Man would I love to be stuck in a friendzone like that” He scoffed

“Did you just hear yourself?” I laughed “My question still stands though, why do you care? You have your own lady friend, who you picked over me by the way, to be bothered about”  I prompted

"I’m just making sure he isn’t taking advantage of you at this time of dismay which you’re going through…” He sighed

“Excuse me?” I huffed

“Y/N, you can’t lie to me and say that you aren’t the tiniest bit jealous of her. I mean come on! I’ve seen the daggers you give her every time you make eye contact, it’s like you’re thinking of a hundred ways of how to kill her” He laughed to himself as I continued to stand un-entertained by his antics. I was most definitely not jealous of her! I mean sure she had to be the replacement of me being Sehun’s tutor for the past two years, but now that I’ve seen how much of an ass he’s being about this, I’m extremely glad this happened.

“You are just so full of yourself aren’t you? Saying all I ever think about is you. Well news flash mister Oh Sehun, I do not have any feelings for you! Emphasis on NOT!” I clarified “There is no reason for me to be jealous of her so shut your egotistical ass up and leave me alone” I snapped, half-lying to myself

“Jealously so evident in those sentences…” He sighed as I let out a groan at his consistent douchebagery. It’s a word. As the smirk continued to play on his features, I decided to set things straight as I walked up as close as possible to him, looking him in the eye as I spoke

“You listen to me, and you listen to me loud and clear Oh Sehun. I am not jealous of you and your perfect princess of a tutor, so why don’t you just waltz out of this section just as easily as you barged in, and take your asshole vibe with you” I finally hissed pushing his chest back with my hand and walking away; only for my wrist to be instantly gripped by him as he twirled me in to his chest with our arms tangled between us. We tried to steady our breaths as the unwanted tension began to build up again; focusing on anything rather than his face becoming an extremely hard thing to do, staring into each other’s eyes out of will.

“And scene” His low chuckle sent me mixed feelings and right now, this felt extremely frustrating. “Now you listen to me Y/N. My efforts of finding out your feelings towards me have definitely paid off, maybe not in the most graceful way” He began and I continued to impatiently stare at him, but I already kind of caught the drift of this being a confession “And I’d like to clarify one thing before you get mad at me; I had no intention of making you jealous, I just knew ‘Defence Against the Dark Arts’ isn’t your forte so I asked Jian. But when you started getting closer to Chanyeol, I started feeling this odd possessive vibe towards you and I honestly feel like that whenever you’re close to guys” He mumbled

“Sehun you can’t do that… I’m not your girlfriend and people are going to start getting ideas-” I

“Why? Why are you not my girlfriend Y/N?” He asked childishly

“Sehun I-” I began to feel at a loss of words because this wasn’t exactly the conversation I was expecting to have with my best friend. But hey! Here we are now.

“No no no, you like me -Baek told me, you can kill him later- and I’m absolutely crazy about you, so why aren’t you my girlfriend yet?” He

“Asking me would be a good start” I mumbled in the heat of the moment, my eyes widening at my own words as I looked up at him with wide eyes, as if to say ‘I don’t know where that came from’

“So… Do you want to be my girlfriend?” His voice came out unusually nervous as he spoke. My mind was suddenly a mess after I looked up at his hopeful eyes; I subconsciously nodded at his words causing a smug grin to take over his features. I didn’t know what just happened, but apparently I was glad it did.

A/N: I’m really sorry that the ending came out a little… poopy :( But I hope you lovelies liked the rest of the imagine as I have worked really hard on it :) I hope the anon(s) who requested, liked this (yes I merged two requests again, but they paired so beautifully! Please don’t kill me hehe) Thank you all for reading <3

~Shazz xx


My sisters reaction to Dragon Age characters

My sister never played any Dragon Age and I introduced her to some characters.

My sis: He looks like a girl.
Me: She is a girl
My sis: Oh… She looks like a boy

My sis: Its a stone…

My sis:
*Silence* …. a woman.

My sis:
He looks like Dj Bobo

My sis:
He looks like a bogle

My sis:
Is his face made of car parts?

My sis:
Hes cute

*Long silence*
Me: Shes a lesbian
My sis: Yeah thats pretty obvious

My sis:
is that a gypsy?

Iron Bull:
Me: Hes one of my favs
My sis: Is that a tree on his head?
Me: ….Its horns
My sis: And a slug on his eye?

My sis:
Hes just as ugly as boris becker

My sis:
Eww wth, I wouldnt want to run into him at night

My sis:
Okay hes handsome thats mine, can I have him?

My sis:
Oh look, Voldemort found his nose

My sis:
Theres a candle

My sis:
I dont like her tattoos

And this is my husband
My sis: He looks like he ripped out his bones and smeared them onto his skin.
Me: …..These markings are painful to him you know?
My sis: Hes cute tho.

My sis:
He looks like Johnny Depp with a weird beard.

My sis:
Hes cross eyed, I bet his aiming is horrible.
Me: Oh, you wanna say that to his face?
My sis: You think he could even see me with those eyes?

Seventeen as things said on my kakao chats

S. Coups: You rude people, I’m so dissapointed in you three. Ditching school when there’s only two classes left.

Jeonghan: I might not go to school today. It is pouring down so hard. And I’m enjoying this bowl of diabetes.

Joshua: Not alcohol ;)

Jun: What type of fanfictions have you been reading? Bad kinds.

Wonwoo: send a psychiatrist.

Hoshi: I’m sorry, I’ll take my puns elsewhere.

Woozi: I hate you.

DK: I shall go to Mexico and become a man named Giosue.

Mingyu: *sends friends holiday pics on the chat because friend is too lazy to do it herself*

The8: Ma toast has a heart in it.

Seungkwan: Eww so ugly.

Vernon: say the name. Memeteen.

Dino: help eomma.

what kpop fans say:

  • “treat idols better!”
  • “idols are human too”
  • “they trained for like seven years oh my god”
  • “they sacrificed so much to become an idol… they literally see their family on a monthly basis omg i would cry”
  • “idols are criticized for every little thing they do and say just back off a bit am i right?”
  • “idols go through so much! they can’t even date, they can’t even gain like 0.5 kg”
  • “look at them crying… omg so heartbreaking they must be under so much pressure”
  • “oh my god look at the way those staff members mistreat those idols… how could you say that to someone?”
  • “literally how could you say that to a human being”
  • “they worked so hard… they don’t deserve this treatment just because of the actions of one member”
  • “omg… all that talent gone to waste…”
  • “idols deserve to be treated with a little more respect”

what kpop fans say at the slightest hint of a controversy which is 50% speculation + 30% blurry video + 10% mistranslation + 10% misunderstanding due to cultural differences: 

  • “omg *insert group* is cancelled”
  • “omg delete *insert group*
  • “fuck *insert group*
  • “y’all still gonna stan???”
  • “i know it’s not like confirmed or anything but they seem so problematic tbh u can just tell”
  • “honestly anyone who’s a(n) *insert fandom* can unfollow me rn”
  • “eww all of them are gross”
  • “ugly af”
  • “how did they even become idols tbh”
  • “haha they’re such flops”
  • “who ?? that’s right they’re nobodies”
  • “i know it’s just *insert member* but honestly they can all go fuck themselves”