ew i know it looks like shit but

A message to anyone who doesn't think The Arts are hardcore as fuck:

You’re wrong.

If a dancer sprains their ankle they’ll just wrap it and smile through the pain as they do crazy-ass jumps and turns and shit on it. Like, how even, Id be crying and falling over but they look like fucking deities

Theater kids rehearse for hours every day. HOURS. Like, 8+ hours on a SUNDAY for gods sake I don’t see no football player doing that tbh

Don’t even get me started on music kids. Not only do they have to have SUCH A HIGH TOLERANCE FOR BULLSHIT but reeds are fucking hell and strings fillet your fingers into little strips of flesh. Ew, I know.

And like the art kids (painting and sculpting and that shit) holy hell
do they have patience. Anyone else who stares at a canvas for 6 hours consecutively would probs go
insane and commit mass murder. And holy hell batman paint hurts like a soda can up your ass when it gets in your eyes like nooooo

Makeup artists have to deal with your ugly ass faces and somehow (probs by using black magic) turn trashcans into gods.

Then there’s photographers who will literally sometimes crawl down drainpipes or fall head-first out
of trees to get a nice picture. I wouldn’t do none of that shit wasted as fuck, let alone sober.

Conclusion: Art ppl= hardcore as peaches

WITCH AU’S
  • “i cant believe you got us kicked out of another coven, dude, you gotta quit stepping on peoples familiars”
  • “you know, when i signed up for this expedition to finish this spell you didnt say we’d be trecking through the bitter wilderness with candles and creatures chasing us, what the fuck, dude”
  • “im a newbie witch and this is my first ritual and i was all excited to see herbs and salts and boiling cauldrons not tHIS JESUS CHRIST—THATS ALOT OF BLOOD
  • “for the last time, you cant have a tiger as your familiar” 
  • “look theres a reason why we do our rituals in private, things can get out of hand and sometimes we spit up blood, its not like we mean to do it. knock next time.”
  • “and, when that happens dont go around scaring the living shit out of people, jesus stacy, this is why people think we’re satanic”
  • “okay look, im as commitied to this lifestyle as anyone else but do you not see how expensive this shit is? and where the hell am i going to find a sabertooth fang? what, do i have to rob a museum??”
  • “we’re gonna rob a museum. c’mon it’ll be easy, we have our spellbook. we won’t get caught”
  • “so you’re saying you broke into the museum to steal a sabertooth fang and a thigh bone from an extinct bird…for a luck spell?/ yes, officer.”
  • “you hexed me because i made fun of the way you eat so now my tastebuds hate everything i put in my mouth and so I’m either gonna starve or eat this shit you call chocolate, i hate you so much”
  • “youre this sweet looking cutie that i always see walking through the outdoor department looking for flowers, and you always ask if you can check everything out here, which happens to be a lot of bloody meat and candles and knives and….you know my mother always told me the devil would look like an angel”
  • “you convinced me that our last apartment was haunted by throwing drawers open and breaking glasses whenever i came home, but it turns out you just didnt like the neighbors and wanted an excuse to move”
  • “you stumbled across my alter and before i could scare the everliving shit out of you to keep your mouth shut, you turned around, scoffed, and bragged that yours looked so much better”
  • “cmon babe you know i hate it when you tell the future, you stop breathing and you freeze up and your eyes literally roll to the back—STOP IT EW I HATE U SO MUCH––UGH QUIT LAUGHING YOU SHIT”
  • “my dreams…when i see people, it says who they truly are
    • and what does it say about me
      • it says youre a lying bitch for stealing my sandalwood incense from Nepal, stacy, my tarantula saw you come in my room—give it back”

A propos of absolutely nothing, here are all the things I love about the ‘get Erik out of prison’ sequence in XMDoFP …possibly more than the ‘get everyone out of the mansion’ scene in XMA because I’m a sucker for even the slightest hint of dadneto.

  • Why exactly do Charles and Hank have a blueprint of the Pentagon???
  • And how much of the overall plan were they able to come up with just by looking at that? Did they know how many guards would be between the elevator and Erik’s cell?? Or did they have to wait for Peter to ask him if he could do this?
  • Charles was driving and Logan hated it.
  • Charles, Logan and Hank were all crammed into the front bench of that car.
  • Peter’s mother’s car is turquoise.
  • She keeps the chain lock on the door like that’s going to stop Peter doing shit.
  • There was a car ride with Charles, Logan, Hank, and Peter. Did they stuff Peter in the back by himself? Or did someone have to sit next to him? Was it Charles, please tell me it was Charles “he’s a pain in the arse” Xavier.
  • There had to be a moment where they explained their idea to Peter but how much did that cover? Did Peter know he’d have to break the glass like that or did he just come up with that on the fly?
  • Also there’s a truncheon on the guard’s uniform that he steals - he could have just used that but since when did anyone related to Erik ever pass up the chance to be all Extra with their powers?
  • How was Erik not covered in tiny cuts and pieces of glass.
  • MIND THE GLASS means ‘get out of the fucking way,’ Erik.
  • Do you think Fassbender did that pull up all by himself or did he have help
  • Peter had his hair tucked under at the back to make it look short, since guards probably wouldn’t be allowed chin-length hair.
  • Then while Erik is climbing up out of the cell, Peter undoes his hair.
  • Erik is totally up for being rescued, even though it’s by this crazy kid who showered him in glass. “Lol don’t care who this is or what he wants, let’s blow this popsicle stand.”
  • How did those slidey doors work without any metal anyway?
  • How long did it take Peter to work out that anybody he takes on a superspeed run is in danger of whiplash? Or did Charles or Hank casually mention that maybe Peter should try not to break this dude’s neck while escaping?
  • WHIPLAAASH
  • I LOVE Erik’s little quirk of a smile when they stop in the elevator like “holy shit that’s a cool power” before the nausea catches up with him.
  • Peter changing his clothes back - were they just lying in a heap in the corner of the elevator? Because I can imagine him making a little duct tape bag with those wide gaping moments and hiding them there, taped up against the wall like the guard.
  • That guard was not paid enough for that shit
  • Charles, Hank and Logan did not tell Peter who they were breaking out. They probably told him “his name is Erik and he controls metal and we need him” but never mentioned the ‘maybe shot JFK’ thing.
  • “I don’t know karate, but I know crazy” like Erik you really like this kid, don’t you? I see you. You think his powers are cool and you’re joshing with him, even while you struggle not to puke.
  • Evan Peters’ smile is very cute <3
  • “My mom once knew a guy who could do that” Twin faces of “… wait” because both of you are smart little beans.
  • What kind of conversation did Peter have with his mother like “no you’re not alone, there other people out there who can do things like you, I knew a guy one time - well, a few times - who could control metal” but like leaving out the fact that that mutant is his father????
  • Erik robbed of the chance to go down the “and who is your mother, exactly?” road because Charles punches him in the jaw so hard he spins.
  • Peter’s face when the door opens like “hey, see I got him”
  • Peter continuing to make conversational faces at the guard while Charles and Erik bicker.
  • But also nobody else ever bats an eyelid at the guy being strapped to the wall.
  • Erik’s little nod to Charles, like was that actually agreeing “okay we won’t kill anybody” just moments before flinging a bunch of kitchen knives up into the air or???
  • Peter waiting until the very last second, when all the guns have been fired, to say “hey yeah I don’t think this was in their plan, I should probably do something. But let’s make it fun.”
  • He’s going so fast that every step he takes along the wall smashes the tiles
  • He slaps that guy and pokes the other one in the face. The speed he’s going at, that’s two very concussed humans. Maybe a broken jaw.
  • That other guy is getting a plate frisbee-d into his face
  • The bullets have barely left the barrels at this stage and Charles, Erik and Logan are still exactly as they were when Peter started.
  • How do plastic guns work anyway. Don’t guns get hot when you fire them?
  • Haha these hot plastic guns are going to smack these guys right in their faces it’s gonna be great gimme that hat
  • Oh fuck right bullets
  • He zips back to the guys EVEN FASTER than he was going before
  • He moves the bullets and this is where i get emotional because to me at least it echoes a page in the comic Magneto: Testament* where Erik and his parents are lined up by soldiers and shot, falling back into a mass grave. You see the bullets coming towards them and you infer that Erik’s powers instinctively protect him but he doesn’t really even know he has them never mind controls them so everybody else dies. My sappy, over-analytical brain loves that this time it’s his son moving the bullets. And although Peter moves the bullets heading for Charles first, he’s standing directly in front of Erik and smiles at him
  • before zipping away to stand at the opposite side of the room, just in case the guys were in any doubt who just saved their collective bacon.
  • Erik’s face going from “wtf was that” to “holy shit it was him” then looking to Charles like “who tf is this guy because really you could have just waited in the car”
  • And then secondarily looking at Logan like “I don’t know you either, who the fu- ew”
  • Ok let’s get the fuck outta here
  • Did they just casually stroll back to the parking lot, all soaking wet and with Erik in his prison PJs??
  • What was going on upstairs - did they evacuate the Pentagon when the fire alarms went off or when the alarms for Erik’s cell went off? Or is everyone else still getting on with their day? Like Hank is still on the tour or waiting in the car?
  • Holy shit there was a car ride to their airport with Charles, Logan, Hank, Erik and Peter.
  • Did they stop to get Erik some clothes? Or did they bring spares? Like it’s been ten years but Charles still has Erik’s shit lying around the house.
  • The plane has an Xavier coat of arms on the tail holy shit
  • Peter kept the hat
  • “I saw your flight plan in the cockpit, why are you going to Paris?” like they literally told him nothing about the plan just “break into the Pentagon and get Erik” and Peter’s just like “haha yeah ok sounds fun”
  • Logan, just let Erik have the newspaper, he’s been in jail for a decade he has no idea what’s going on.
  • “Take it slow” hahahahahahahahahahaha I wonder what ever happened to that poor car. Can Peter even drive? Like it wouldn’t take him long to learn, and he’d have killer reflexes but like why would he need to drive anywhere???
  • “You’re going to find this hard to believe but you and Charles send me here from the future.” Erik’s face like What The Actual Fuck, it’s been a really weird day today and that’s still the biggest crock of shit I ever heard.

The end, mostly. I could go on like, did Peter ever admit to his mother he helped break Magneto out of jail and what kind of chewing out did he get? That guard who was taped to the elevator wall, like, did he get shot by the plastic bullets? Or was he just totally shellshocked by the whole experience and when people question him afterwards he’s just like “nuh-uh, that guy could be anywhere, listening, and I wouldn’t even know he was there until after he got me so no I ain’t talking.” “you mean Lehnsherr?” “what? No, Lehnsherr’s the least of your worries. It’s his friends you have to look out for.”

*Magneto: Testament is a really good comic. And by good I mean harrowing and intense.

Tonight’s banter, featuring My Girls

I spent tonight driving around in circles on Eos. I went there so I could finish the two nontrackable side quests I have there. Two hours later, I have a. acquired two more stupid sidequests including anOTHER NONTRACKABLE ONE, b. not advanced the naming the dead one at all whatsoever, and c. ran into yet another glitch that’s making my one with the kett surveillance devices uncompletable so. I am going to try and go back to that one later when hopefully it’s fixed. But here’s all the banter I heard tonight, in order:

Peebee: You’re not a turian citizen, are you? I just realized. You weren’t on the Natanus – and you don’t act like them.
Vetra: You’re right. I’m not a citizen. I was taken from Palaven real young. Didn’t even get to boot camp. A real turian might look down at me. And so you know, I’m using my mother as the example of “real turian.“ I don’t remember much about Palaven, but I remember her. She always looked like she was shitting a tank.
Peebee: Ew…

Peebee: Where was I? Oh, right. Me and the oddball salarian, whose name I can’t remember… We stowed away on a batarian freighter, ended up skinny-dipping in this glass-bottom pool, suspended over… What? You look bored.
Vetra: No, uh, not bored, I’m…
Peebee: All right, never mind. It doesn’t matter.
Vetra: Peebee, it’s just…
Peebee: It’s fine, it’s just a ridiculous night of stupid pointless crap anyway.

Peebee: Can you believe that lady at the Vortex? Shoving her way to the front of the bar?
Vetra: “I’m an asari. By the goddess, I’m too beautiful to wait in line.”
Peebee: “The time wasted might take up a millionth of a percentage of my life!”
Vetra: [Laughs] Hey, at least it wasn’t a turian, huh? “The rules didn’t tell me what to order, so I just waited forever.”
Peebee: Nice!

Peebee: Vetra, don’t tell any of the others, but you’re my favorite.
Vetra: Why are you whispering? Does that include Ryder?
Peebee: Shhhhhhhhh! [giggles]

Vetra: Okay, look. I’m not bored by your stories.
Peebee: You sure look it.
Vetra: It gets me a little… annoyed sometimes.
Peebee: I have that effect.
Vetra: It’s not you, Peebee. It’s the stuff. Sure, maybe it was stupid pointless crap, like you said, but you had fun. I never got to do fun, meaningless things when I was young. Didn’t have the luxury.
Peebee: Because of Sid.
Vetra: Yeah. Maybe those things feel pointless because you’ve done it enough to dismiss them.

Peebee: So listen, V. I’m calling you “V” now, okay?
Vetra: Uh…
Peebee: Next time we’re on Kadara, you and me, we’ll do something dumb and fun.
Vetra: Kadara’s volatile. I might jeopardize business dealings, I–
Peebee: Nah, nah, nah. Don’t wanna hear it. We’ll get you different clothes, slap some face paint on… You can be “Thessaria” for the night. Or “Nixiana” or “Cleo.” Whatever you like.
Vetra: Drecilla.
Peebee: Uh-huh! You are so in.
Vetra: [Laughs] I’m in! All the way.

Just Benefits (M)

Genre: Smut, university!AU, FWB!AU (slight angst?)
Word count: 4331
Description: You don’t know a lot about the man you share your bed with and it doesn’t necessarily bother you. However such things are never meant to last, which makes you question what the outcome with Jeon Jungkook will be in the end.
Warnings: Mature content
Author’s note: I just got hit with inspiration to write something with Jungkook and this was the outcome. Also, FWB is one of my favorite AUs so I just had to give it a try myself. :D

Keep reading

Well that was.. abnormally fast. Turns out I had downloaded some shorter semester mod in fucking August and then forgotten all about it! Why would I download such an unholy concoction in the first place is beyond me. It’s back in hell where it belongs now so we’re getting the full college experience going forward but ugh, upsetting nonetheless..

I mean is there enough time in the world to enjoy this crazy bitch that was slapping Gunther yesterday (for ‘cheating on her’ even though they’re not even friends) heartfart over him now? Girl what is wrong with you.

-I’M A WORK IN PROGRESS OK

Aren’t we all.

-NOT I. I’M ABSOLUTELY PERFECT THE WAY I AM, EVERYONE IN CAMPUS IS LUSTING AFTER ME AND I HAVE THE HEIR VOTE IN THE BAG

You also keep washing dishes that aren’t your own.

-A girl sees you voluntarily cleaning up, she starts to wonder what else you could offer without her asking ;)

Ew yea that’s definitely not a thing.

-IT’S A THING

YEA OK IT’S A THING. NOTHING SEXIER THAN ROTTING FOOD AND OTHER PEOPLE’S SALIVA

-Ah there you are <3 I saw you washing worm covered dishes earlier, you have to keep that for my eyes only baby <3

GODDAMMIT BLUE MEATBALLS WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SHITTING ALL OVER MY POINTS

UM OK JOIN US WHY DON’T YOU

LOL looks like you got yourself a girlfriend, Gunther! Congrats, didn’t think you had it in you.

-Help. me.

No can do baby. And I actually mean that, I wouldn’t know how to break you two up even if I wanted to. I mean you slept with someone else in the middle of your date and she stood there smiling, there’s obviously no stopping this crazy train. See you at the wedding!  

Meanwhile Daniel is making a very important call that I’m sure is gonna fail.. but you never know if you don’t try..

OMG SHE SAID YES. STEP INTO OUR HAMMER-&-SICKLE-SHAPED-WEB BRITTANY. 

LMAO see you never, nerds.

-Ooooh a love letter for me from a secret admirer <3

Yea that’s obviously for Gunther from a very special lady. I legit don’t remember which one but PUT THAT DOWN BRITTANY IS COMING, she’s gonna think you’re some kind of player. 

-Well 2 minutes of conversation are gonna take care of that misconception.

Yea you can say that again.

UUUUUUGH this can’t NOT work they’re perfect for each other I know it!!! COME ON BRIT DON’T LET ME DOWN

-FOR THE LAST TIME DANIEL, PRETTY WOMAN IS NOT ABOUT THE LUMPENPROLETARIAT 

-UGH you could not be more wrong, comrade Brit Brit, but bourgeois college apathy has obviously crushed whatever critical thinking skills managed to survive the sorority confirmation process.

Good god. Ok that’s enough, time to see what we’re really dealing with here. GET UP.

THAT’S BETTER. HOPE THOSE HEARTS AREN’T FOR THE BIRD

FUCKING BYE I KNEW IT. I KNEW THEY WERE MEANT TO BE. I mean both popularity and both suck ass at it + polar opposites at everything else?? Romeo and Juliet who.

Marvin Gaye - Let’s get it on.mp3

Interrupting our wonderful time is the cow harassing the girl Gunther woohooed in the middle of his date with Meatballs. I love college <3

Time to move this party to the bedroom! Just us, Brit, and our new best friend. Judging from the positions in the above photo, Daniel’s first sexual experience isn’t going to be a conventional one.

Aw come on Brit, don’t be like that, there’s plenty of Dan to go around!

Ok now you’re just making Mr Cow sad. Stop excluding him!!

UGH he left, hope you pillowchested assholes are happy with yourselves.

That’s right, get them, crazy secret society blonde!

-HEY I’M TRYING TO SLEEP HERE YOU DICKS

-WELL CLOSE YOUR FUCKING DOOR GIRL, GAWD

-NO, I’M TRYING TO SLEEP *HERE*. GET OUT OF THE BED

Hope you enjoyed the view, blondie!

The love juices have yet to dry as Wyatt rushes to occupy the bed. I feel the need to remind readers THAT DORMIES HAVE THEIR OWN BEDS. You literally wouldn’t know from looking at my game.

Case in fucking point, immediately after Wyatt awakens, another one of Jojo’s semi-lovers helps himself to our communal bed. Remember Ti-Ning? He’s stinking under the covers and as I suspected, Jojo ‘hates him’ aka is secretly into him. Good to see the Blue Meatballs stalking method gaining more fans!

WELL WELL WELL look who moved in. After Gunther ‘cheated’ on the redhead lunatic sis, the responsibility of getting us into the secret society has fallen squarely on Jojo’s frail shoulders. 

-HEY

SORRY, on Jojo’s buff, well-defined shoulders. 

-Thank you.

You keep your eye on the prize, right?

-Of course. Every step she takes, every breath she takes-

-So as I was saying, it’s an absolute disgrace that there isn’t A SINGLE flat earth class in this college. Of course we all know who’s responsible.. Starts with -I, ends with -lluminati..

-Yea, I’m out.

NO YOU DON’T. Must I remind you what’s at stake here??

-Must I remind you I don’t care about resurrecting that stupid cat? I mean if it was Victor, we’d be having a different conversation.

Ugh fucking Victor istg. But NO, I’m talking about finally getting what your tiny, murderous heart has been craving all those years.. THE COWPLANT. Just think about it, Jojo..

-Oh god, the power, the unlimited power.. Fucking Ti-Ning is first on my list.

Yea we all know you want to fuck Ti-Ning but I don’t think you have to threaten him with a cowplant, he’d probably say yes if you asked him out-

-I MEAN FIRST ON MY KILL LIST STFU

-You know what repulses me, dear Jojό? Musique classique, is absolutely the worst, no? I mean who likes it apart from bores and killers seriàl? 

-Oh yea, you’re so right, Ti-Ning WYATT.

God Jojo are you so committed to this charade of denial that you’re gonna date someone who hates creepy classical music? What’s next? Does he hate bow-ties and oedipal complexes too?

-’Scuse me, my.. girlfriend.. is waiting for me.. When did life get so unfun :(

-Oui, I think it’s imperative that you sever all relationships with anyone wearing plaid pantalons, Jojό.. Très unseemly..

-Oh my <3

Well this stamp of approval is the fucking deathblow, JOJO GET OUT NOW. TI-NING’S DOOR IS RIGHT THERE

-NEVER. IN FACT..

-My god, Wyatt, your manipulative criticism of my interests and family is attractive to say the least! 

NOP I don’t accept this, even you can’t keep this bullshit up!

-WATCH ME. I’M GOING TO BUY A RING TOMORROW. ONE MADE OF CHEESE SINCE HE’S FRENCH

</3

Speaking of ‘</3′ looks like Meatballs hired a sniper to hit Gunther with the arrow of love. I extremely have other plans for him so this is obviously not happening but NICE TRY MEATBALLS

………..OMG. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM, YOU BROKE HIM

-HA. Watch and learn bitch, first I let him be his gross whoring self.. and now that I have him.. the era of Blue Meatballs.. BEGINS.

WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT FUCKING COWPLANT

That EW clip tho.

I just about died. Tobias is so cute. Shout out to @fuckyeahrichardrankin for your boy, looking all crochety and bearded and whatnot.

I mean, look at this nugget.

And then he’s gonna act like he’s ashamed. It’s OK. I know you were reading Descartes and shit when they taught TP roll replacement. I understand, boo.

His face when he thinks about maybe dissing Pigeon but then doesn’t.

All in all, a nice Friday surprise.

aureliaixin  asked:

give us an edgy 10/10 cursed tavros backstory

cHAPTER 1,

aN: SPECIAL FANGZ (GET IT, cOZ IM GOFFIK) 2 MY BF (EW NOT IN THAT WAY) GAMZEE, sLIMEYTEARZ666 4 HELPIN ME WIF DA STORY AND SPELLING, u ROK, aRADIA UR DA LUV OF MY DEPRZZING LIFE U ROK 2, mCR ROX,

xXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

hI MY NAME IS TAVROS DARK’NESS DEMENTIA RAVEN WAY AND I HAVE LONG EBONY BLACK HAIR (THAT’S HOW I GOT MY NAME) WITH BROWN STREAKS AND A WIDOWS PEAK THAT REACHES MY MID-BACK AND  BROWN EYES LIKE SHIT AND A LOT OF PEOPLE TELL ME I LOOK LIKE DANTE BASCO (AN: IF U DON’T KNOW WHO HE IS GET DA HELL OUT OF HERE,), i’M NOT RELATED TO ANDREW HUSSIE BUT I WISH I WAS BECAUSE HE’S A MAJOR FUCKING HOTTIE, i’M A TROLL BUT MY TEETH ARE STRAIGHT AND WHITE, i HAVE PALE TINFOIL SKIN, i’M ALSO A JUJU, aND I GO TO AN ALTERNATE PLANE CALLED SBURB IN SPACE WHERE I’M IN THE SEVENTH YEAR (I’M SIX SWEEPS), i’M A GOTH (IN CASE YOU COULDN’T TELL) AND I WEAR MOSTLY THE SKINS OF MY VICTIMS, i LOVE HOT TOPIC AND I BUY ALL MY CLOTHES FROM THERE, fOR EXAMPLE TODAY I WAS WEARING A BLUE AND WHITE STRIPED TSHIRT AND BRIGHT GREEN JORTS, i WAS WEARING BLACK LIPSTICK, wHITE FOUNDATION, bLACK EYELINER AND RED EYE SHADOW, i WAS WALKING OUTSIDE THE FURTHEST RING, iT WAS SNOWING AND RAINING SO THERE WAS NO SUN, wHICH I WAS VERY HAPPY ABOUT, a LOT OF PREPS STARED AT ME, i PUT UP MY POPSICLE STICK MIDDLE FINGER AT THEM,

“HEY TAVROS,” SHOUTED A VOICE, i LOOKED UP, iT WAS…, dRACO MALFOIL,

“WHAT’S UP DRACO,” I ASKED,

“NOTHING,” HE SAID SHYLY,

bUT THEN, i HEARD MY FRIENDS CALL ME AND I HAD TO GO AWAY,

xXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ride you like my Harley - Trixya - Chapter 4 - AnnieSantaWifey

A/N - AU world inspired by the TV show Sons of Anarchy. ‘Croweater’ is a term from the show that I forgot to explain before, it’s basically a girl that sleeps with the members of the club and is there only for that one reason.
Everything is told from Katya’s POV.

A/N 2 - The Russian words used in this chapter are; Doll, Princess and Fuck.

T/W - bad language, probably grammar mistakes, mentions of drugs, smut.

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ID #66762

Name: Lucy
Age: 22
Country: New Zealand

I am 22 years old, currently living in New Zealand, I have recently finished studying, and I am living at home again, Iv had pen pals before and really enjoyed it. Things I like are Tattoos, I have many Studio Ghibli ones and some Sailor Moon ones, I like Korean Dramas, Anime, Manga, all that nerdy shit, and I love cats I have four of them. I am also a Vegan, so I like plants and shit I guess. I like open minded people, cause if you say dumb stuff I will fight you. But dont get me wrong I am a nice person easy to get along with and talk to. So Im looking for cool people to talk to and send letters to, and who knows maybe we fall in love. JK ew.

Preferences: I would like people who are around the same age as me, 20+ but not old boring mature people, Im not at that level of mature and boring yet, Male or Female I dont care really. If we vibe then that’s all that matters YO! I dont care what country you are from either.

anonymous asked:

I saw that you compared lili reinhart with cole sprouse on our twitter and I know cole is a giant pile of actual shit but what has lili done that is problematic? idk much about her

she literally called wlw sexuality “fan-fiction”, then backpedaled and said she lOOoOOOoves beronica!! she goes through the beronica tumblr tag everyday!! (… ew, straight girl?) and then said this… like… i probably don’t have to tell you how damaging and discouraging that is to closeted wlw girls and wlw who struggle with their sexuality or wlw who look up to their idols & yeah admittedly she’s not racist or abusive but that doesn’t mean she’s any less terrible and they truly are made from the same stale flour

10

This is Persephone. 

In Connecticut there was an event held by the news. It was called “NBC Connecticut clear the shelters”. The day it happened the shelter decided that they wouldn’t close down until every pet had a home. I got there pretty late, but I was looking for a cat because my doctor had ordered me a prescription for a cat for my depression. The place is packed. Waiting time was horrible. I started browsing the cats, and there was this one that people passed and there were audible “ew"s and “that’s gross” even from adults. I figured out which one they were looking at. She was nearly hairless on the sides, but the was pawing the glass like all hell. I looked at her and all I could think was ‘you look like you’ve been through some shit, too.’ I wanted her. She wasn’t perfect and people were turning their noses to her and I know what it’s like to be in that position all too well. When we got her home, she didn’t hide. She wandered my room, hopped on everything, and when I laid down she laid on top of me and her purring was louder than thunder. Since then we’ve been pretty much inseparable. She had been found on the street by a family and given to the shelter after a week. Her hair had been matted to the point where they couldn’t brush through it, so they had to shave it off. 

We went through training to become pet partners (pet therapy) and she went to school with me a lot. She was nicknamed “empress” and “her majesty” because she looks at people like they don’t deserve her glory.  They let me test with her on my lap.  During finals we sat in the hall so people passing from one final to the next could relieve stress with cuddles. I also took her to daycare and the kids loved her.

She’s leash trained and makes me walk her in the middle of the night even though she uses a litter box

She rescued me just as much as I did her.

(submitted by @calmhighblood)

For my Theatre class we had to pick a scene from a movie and change the genre. Like romance to action, drama to comedy. So I kinda…

Setting: Elf-King’s Hall

Thranduil: *sees Guards approaching with Thorin Oakenshield* Well, look what the trolls dragged in!

Thorin: You know, it’s not very nice to call your guards trolls - even if it is true.

Guard 1: *goes for sword but is stopped by Guard 2*

Thranduil: Now, now, let’s play nice. All I want to know is what you dwarrow kids were doing on my lawn.

Thorin: Oh, just the usual… Getting lost, getting high on poisonous air, being attacked by spiders…

Thranduil: Spiders! So that’s why you’re covered in cobweb. I though maybe it’d been so long since you last had a date that you were literally collecting dust.

Thorin: You blonde bimbo! I’ll have you know that I’m currently dating a very attractive hobbit! I’m just not sure where he is right now… Anyway, that’s not the point. What the hell is wrong with your forest? Did you get a new gardener or something?

Thranduil: No, there’s just some evil junk going on. I don’t what to do about it, and everytime I bring it up to Elrond he just tells me to piss off. All because of what happened at that one rave…

Thorin: And we’re veering into the TMI zone. I swear you elves must be high all the time. Now could you and your fellow leaf-munchers let me and my company go?

Thranduil: Why? So you can go piss off Smaug and set a dragon loose on the land? No thank you!

Thorin: You know, we wouldn’t have this problem if you could have gotten down off your high-elk and helped my people out a century ago.

Thranduil: You hairy little shit! As if I don’t know what facing a dragon is like. I was whooping dragon ass when you great-great-grandfather was in diapers. Just look at this scar! *reveals scar*

Thorin: EW! It looks like burnt bacon!

Thranduil: That’s right, and unless you too want bacon face, you’d better take some of my elf homies with you.

Thorin: Hell. No. There is no room in my company for anyone who takes three hours to brush their hair in the morning.

Thranduil: As if you people can talk with all those stupid braids you wear! That’s it - to the dungeon with you!

Guards: *start to take Thorin away*

Thranduil: And by the way! I do hope you enjoy your dinner of…VEGETABLES!

Thorin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(I think I’ll get an A)

anonymous asked:

I think A.D. is Caleb and he's a Drake. Caleb is Mary's other child. And he's Spencer brother. He's a genius when comes to technology and disappears when big A.D. shit goes down. Another thing: Did Caleb and Ali know each other waaaaaay before the liars did. Remember when he was first introduced to Ali it was super awkward and looked at each other like they knew each other? I wonder if that scene would be answered.

Ew. No. I don’t need him on screen anymore than he already is.

Imagine that Peter is in a relationship with Harry, and he takes pictures of him all the time and uploads them to his Instagram or tumblr or what-have-you.

And like, of course sometimes Harry poses, or they pose together, or they’re being silly for the camera. But mostly Peter likes taking pictures of Harry doing random/every day stuff; eating, taking a walk, working, goofing off, sitting around, etc.

And he’s a complete dork in the captions like “Look at this moron, stuffing his face. Gross.” “Somebody’s not a morning person.” “And here we see the Osborn in its natural habitat…” “Cause of death: THIS SMILE.”

(And occasionally, Harry snaps pictures of Peter when he isn’t paying attention and uploads those with comments like “Guess who left his camera unattended.” “We’re totally not dating. I mean, seriously, look at this loser. Ew.” “I honestly don’t even know this guy.” “What an idiot.”

And then Peter sees them later and laughs his ass off.)

Reaction to going to the Zoo Together

Yongguk

“Can we go to the tigers? I miss Tigger :(”

Himchan

“Ew Zelo why are you feeding the giraffe?? Do you even know where it’s tongue has been or anything???? YUCK *dies* -Sorry the gif is so big-

Daehyun

“OH MY GOD LOOK AT THE MONKEYS THEY’RE SO CUTE”

Youngjae

“Everytime I go by a gorilla I feel like it’s going to throw it’s shit at me like I seen on YouTube. Just saying. 

Jongup

*Calls out to the birds* “Why are they ignoring me!”

Zelo

“Let’s get stuffed animals and add them to my collection!”

(Not my gifs)

anonymous asked:

"Dean only looks like he wants to fuck Sam and that's just ew." even non wincest shippers know it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

You just won this argument with that anon.

That is you, all smug and shit, and I’m the one running by

Nudes ft. feelings // part II

a/n: back by popular demand, lolololol, but yeah, here’s the final for nudes, hope you guys like it. hope it doesn’t suck, so sorry if it does, but I rewrote this like 5 times. Enjoy

————–

I got out of the tub and dried off. I threw on some sweats and a white tank top, letting my hair do whatever, dry in it’s natural waves I’m sure. I took a breath as I walked downstairs to see Sammy sitting on my couch, on the phone.

I walked down and sat next to him, indian style, as he hung up. He looked at me and smiled.

“I ordered the pizza.”

“okay good.”

“are those my sweats?” he asked, nodding at my pants.

“yeah.” I smiled, remembering when I went out with Emily and we were both trashed so we went back to his place and he let me borrow the sweats and I fell asleep in his arms that night.

“they look good on you.”

“they’re like 3 sizes too big.” I laughed.

“maybe, but you still look good in them.”

“stop it. I look homeless in them.” I laughed, but Sammy was just staring at me, silently.

“what?”

“do you remember your senior night game?” he asked.

“yeah.” I smiled, remembering it. “you said you would be out of town, touring, and you were gonna miss it.”

“yeah, you were so pissed at me.”

“hell yeah I was, it was the most important night of my highschool career, and you said you couldn’t be there. I was more upset than pissed.”

“but then when you were being introduced or whatever and you started walking down the court-“

“I looked up and you were standing there at the end of the court, with a thing of flowers. And the Jacks and Nate were in the stands behind you holding those dumb signs” I laughed, remembering them holding signs like ‘number 4 on the court, number 1 in our hearts’ and cheesy stuff like that.

“yeah. But the look on your face when you saw me, that smile you had lit up my whole world. And then you ran down and jumped into my arms.”

“I was happy to see you, I didn’t expect you to be there.” I looked down.

“you think I woulda missed your game?”

“well I wasn’t expecting you to cancel your tour to come watch me play.”

“I was willing to do anything for you (y/n), I can’t believe you never saw it.”

“that’s what friends do though.”

“you still don’t get it.”

“get what Sammy?”

He turned to look at me, and I looked at him. Not much space between us.

“god (y/n) I was so fucking crazy for you back in the day. I never felt like the way I did for you, for anyone else. Fuck I still can’t find someone who makes me feel like you do.”

“Samm-“

“no (y/n), all those hookups, I just needed something to try to get you off my mind. They didn’t work. God, you’ve got me so fucked up and you don’t even realize it. Yeah we’ve been best friends, but I don’t know, somewhere along the line you fucked me up” he laughed.

“Sammy, I don’t know what to say.” I looked at him with sad eyes.

“tell me you feel something for me. Tell me you wanna make us something. Tell me anything (y/n), please.” He begged. I’ve never seen him like this before. I looked away as I started to talk, not being able to look at him in fear I’ll freeze up or make a fool out of myself.

“Sammy, I don’t know when it was, but over the years of us flirting and joking around, I guess somewhere along the line I fell for your shit.” I laughed.

“hey now.” He defended.

“shut up, you know it’s true.”

“I mean, I knew you just needed some time till you fell for daddy’s ways.” He winked.

“ew Sammy, don’t be sick.” I laughed, playfully pushing Sammy, causing him to kinda fall sideways on the couch.

“whatever ma, so you’re saying you’ll give this a try?” he asked hopeful.

“Sammy, your gone half the year on tour. Out late with the guys partying. Or late nights in the studio. I just don’t know how well it’d work out.” I sighed.

“(y/n) look at me.”

I did, and I’ve never seen him look more serious.

“we’ll figure out a way, we’ll make it work. It’s been like this for a while now, and we’ve never had a problem staying friends and hanging out and shit.”

“yeah, but-“

“what are you so afraid of?” he cut me off.

“I’m not afraid.”

“then what is it?”

“Sammy I don’t wanna do this and then shit turn sour and I lose my best friend.”

“you don’t think we would fight for us?”

“No I do, it’s just-“

I was cut off by Sammy’s lips on mine. His hands on my waist as my hands found their way to the back of his neck. He squeezed my side, making me open my mouth as I was ticklish, and he slipped his tongue in my mouth. He pulled me onto his lap, so I was straddling him.

Breathing hot and heavy, hands were roaming, and small moans were coming from each of us. The kiss passionate and hot, everything I expected it to be and so much more.

We finally pulled away, both panting. Resting my forehead against his, I couldn’t help but smile.

“isn’t that worth fighting for?” he breathed out.

“I just don’t want to lose you.” I sighed.

“you won’t ma.”

“how can you be so sure?” I asked, leaning back to look at him better, still toying with his hair.

“I’ve just never wanted anything more than I want you (y/n), you’ve gotta trust me. Please ma. Give us a chance.” He pleaded, and I looked in his eyes, and there was a spark of hope in them. I’ve never seen Sammy like this.

“ma? Please? Nothing’s gonna change, other than the fact that I can kiss you and grab your ass in public, and our friends would actually be right about us. Please (y/n) just give us a chance.”

I just crashed my lips back to his, getting lost in another kiss. I couldn’t help but smile into it. I realized, this is what I wanted. I pulled back and rested my forehead against his.

“is that a yes then?” he asked, his hands cupping my face. I just smiled and nodded and Sammy smiled his perfect smile and crashed his lips to mine, and I’ve never been happier.

shklance sugar daddy au where keith and lance are two poor roommates trying to make ends meet and pay their bills, and one day lance jokingly suggest they find a sugar daddy with the amount of financial shit their in and Keith’s like “you know that’s a good idea” and they literally try to find a sugar daddy.

they look online and everything but they keep having disagreements over the choices because lance is always like “that guy is old as balls.” “ew that guy looks like balls” and keith gets fed up like “lance we are looking for someone to pay our bills and buy us necessities not a life partner” “Hey you may not mind getting fucked by death himself for a $100 worth of groceries but I at least would like to have standards”.

Enter Shiro who’s a nice but kinda lonely guy and he’s loaded, not sure how he meets keith and lance but he does and he feels bad for their circumstances and offers to pay for their bills and stuff and shiro really ends up being more of a sugar buddy than a daddy because he never demands they sleep with him for all the stuff he buys for them (even all the frivolous stuff they want) and lots of hi jinks ensue 

thinking about it I kinda want this shklance au to be more comedy than smutty