ew i don't think i like it

Keith in the garrison part 2
  • Iverson(To Lance): You need to take things far more seriously! You need to learn some damn responsibility boy! You should be more like Keith! Model student he is
  • Lance: Yes sir *rolls his eyes at Hunk when he isn't looking*
  • *Later*
  • Lance: ugh I just don't see what's so good about Keith! Why does Iverson insist I should be like him? Ew
  • Hunk: Well, you do need to take things more seriously
  • Lance: What?! As serious as Keith, Christ look at him!
  • Keith, who is staring at the chicken nugget he just dropped: I think this is the saddest thing that's ever happened to me
  • Shiro, unimpressed: Keith you're literally an orphan
  • Keith: fuck off
COUNTRY JOKES
  • Hungary: Austria I'm hungry.
  • Czech: Maybe you should Czech the fridge?
  • Russia: I'm Russian to the kitchen! *runs in*
  • Turkey: Maybe you will find some Turkey.
  • Greece: We have some but its covered in a layer of Greece.
  • Norway: Ew. theres Norway you can eat that!
  • Chile: I think Ill settle for a can of Chile.
  • Canada: Id like a Canada chile.
  • Denmark: Denmark your name on it.
  • Prussia: But that would Prussiarise it and might damage the chile
  • Sweden: I d'n't Sw'd'n pr'bl'm w'th th't...
  • England: I'm heading England to get some more food.
  • America: Well that would be America, were not even at sea!
  • Germany: That one of Germany problems with this joke.
  • Sealand: But I don't Sealand anywhere nearby?
  • Italy: Italy, me neither.
  • Scotland: Well were on earth, its Scotland.
  • Wales: But its a Wales away.
  • Both irelands: Well its Ireland
  • New Zealand: I New Zealand...
  • Japan: Well I'll get Japan.
  • China: And I'll get the fine China.
  • Spain: Don't over Spain yourself if you can't reach it.
  • France: If you do you could just France around.
  • Hungary: I was asking Austria to get me some food because I was hungry.

anonymous asked:

What placements do you think makes someone romantic and cliche? And what placements makes someone wanna throw up when the mentions of romance and "I love you so so much baby" ew, that's me I don't like it

Hehehhe I’m like a mixture of the two lololol

Romantic and Cliche:
- Cancer, Taurus & Pisces Moon & Venus
- Water dominant
- Cancer or Pisces on 5th or 7th house cusp
- Venus in 1st, 5th or 7th
- Venus dominant
- Libra Venus

Uncomfortable with Romance:
- Air moons!!!
- Gemini or Aquarius Moon & Venus
- Aries Venus or Mars
- Scorpio Venus (ikr plot twist)
- Saturn, Uranus or Pluto in 5th or 7th
- Air dominant
- Gemini or Aquarius on 5th or 7th house cusp
- Venus in 9th, 11th or 12th
- Venus in hard aspect to Mars, Saturn or Uranus

the foxhole court characters as texts @wymack has sent me

Neil: "i have such a short temper i hate it but what can you do"

Andrew: "i’m getting peppermint hot chocolate and it’s 75 degrees"

Kevin: "i’m not in the mood for being conscious"

Aaron: "this is what hell is"

Matt: "least problematic fave"

Nicky: "it’s nbd but to me it’s the end of the world"

Allison: "sometimes i feel like i talk about myself too much but it’s just normal conversation i think"

Dan: "i’m fine with being a girl but like if i had the option i would choose to be a guy this shit is awful"

Renee: "i need to move on to happier things"

Wymack: "now i’m furrowing my brows and am no longer relaxed"

Abby: "she was growling at the male nurse she doesn’t like men that much like bitch me too"

Ichiro: "i’m so fucking dramatic lmao"

Riko: "ew"

Ways to respond to homophobes
  • Homophobe: I'm okay with gays, as long as they don't flirt with me
  • Response: no one wants to flirt with you anyways
  • Homophobe: Please don't show affection in public it's gross.
  • Response: Then why are you showing your face in public it's as equally gross.
  • Homophobe: What a faggot...
  • Response: You called?
  • Homophobe: Sorry, supporting gays is against my religion
  • Response: That's totally fine, please don't force your religion on us.
  • Homophobe: Being gay is a choice
  • Response: So was your dad's choice about pulling out.
  • Homophobe: I want a gay friend
  • Response: And I want a friend who doesn't objectify me for my sexuality's stereotype.
  • Homophobe: Guys belong with girls and girls belong with guys.
  • Response: And you belong in a zoo.
  • Homophobe: Gay guys are a girl in a guy's body/Lesbians are a guy in a girl's body
  • Response: That's transgender, you uncultured swine
  • Homophobe: You're going to hell
  • Response: Aww thanks for the invitation!
  • Homophobe: You're an act against God
  • Response: You would know what that feels like.
  • Homophobe: Ew
  • Response: Please stop looking at me like that I'm not a mirror
  • Homophobe: It's Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve
  • Response: You're forgetting the talking serpent who's the real fake here?
  • Homophobe: I don't want it shoved in my face.
  • Response: What face? All I see is an ass with two eyes.
  • Homophobe: So which one of you is the guy and which one of you is the girl?
  • Response: Surprise! We're gay/lesbians!
  • Homophobe: I'll pray for you.
  • Response: Nah boo I'm cute as hell I'll find someone who'll love me. But I think I need to pray for you because you're gonna have trouble finding someone who will love you with that ugly ass personality.

anonymous asked:

RE: romantic!Tsunade I don't know which is funnier, her trying to set up Oro and him being like "No ew what is this?", him already dating someone secretly, or just silently thinking "I did more for Hyuga/Uchiha relations with a threesome last week than sensei has in his entire career but I'll let her have her fun."

Oh god. Oh god now I want to write Hiashi/Fugaku/Orochimaru what have you done.

Edd: Yeahh whatever it don’t ma-tter anyways-

Edd: Not like he cares

???: Hey, Edd? Can I join you

Edd: Sssure why not 


((I would like to give a very big thank you to @heirfox for helping me with this update I really appreciate it so much you guys should check out their blog they’re amazing! 

Mod~C))

anonymous asked:

I think I'm mostly impressed that you're cool with looking at (not always) NSFW stuff that people draw of you. It looks awesome and the artists are great and it's cool that they do it, but I'd be like "NO DON'T DRAW ME EW I CAN'T"--or maybe that's just 'cause I don't have the bod of a lewd dewd w/ attitude that asks for newds.

I really don’t mind at all! I try to be a super sex positive person, so seeing myself in smutty ways is really flattering. I feel bad sometimes, as I don’t want to reblog some of the NSFW Jared stuff because not everyone who comes to my Tumblr wishes to see that. But know that if you’re an artist who made NSFW with my tag in it, I’ve seen it, and I loved it. If anything, do more. Or send nudes.

anonymous asked:

kagami, kasamatsu, midorima where their crush gives them chocolate, and their teammates tell them to stop being shy and ask the girl out?

Note: giri-choco means obligatory chocolate that girls give to guys in Japanese Valentine’s Day, honmei-choco means the chocolate given to people they have feelings for (genuine instead of obligatory).

This also feels so typically shoujo manga, I’m sorry.


Midorima: 

“What, you haven’t asked her out yet?”

That was Miyaji, bluntly speaking out his mind while autonomously practicing his footwork.

Midorima can hear Takao burst into laughter several feet away from the scene—the dark-haired athlete is lucky that you’re in the perimeter, because if you weren’t, Takao would already have a basketball shot exactly to his head.

Your intentions are simple and straightforward: to give him your homemade chocolates. You might not be confessing yet, since you feel like you haven’t prepared enough, but you’re sure that even someone as dense as Midorima is able to get the message. They are homemade chocolate cookies, after all. A girl doesn’t just give this to any person on Valentine’s Day.

The intricately packaged cookies are held close to your chest when you hear the upperclassman’s words. You feel your heartbeat speeding up exponentially once your brain processes the meaning behind that sentence, which doesn’t take much time: does this mean Midorima intends to confess his feelings to you?

A part of you that hates being disappointed tells you that it might just be a form of teasing, that the boy you’ve pined for so long does not actually return your affections. When you look at him, you bet everything you own that Midorima is going to look more disinterested or annoyed than flustered.

Imagine your surprise when you find him, towering in front of you effortlessly with that height, blushing and melting into a stuttering mess—you catch him saying something along the lines of “senpai, why” but his words are so jumbled and his voice shaky that you almost think you misheard. Midorima covers half of his face with his hand under the pretence of fixing his glasses, when in fact you can clearly see the eyewear pressed so tightly on its correct position.

Hope takes shape as butterflies in your gut, and with whatever voice you are able to muster, you tell him:

“Midorima-kun, I actually l-like you.”

The gym falls into a complete silence.

“I have for quite a while now!” You resume quickly so as to not prolong the awkwardness—you can feel stares pointed at your general direction and you feel your cheeks turning hot red, “so… please accept these?”

Your hands are now outstretched, offering him the packaged cookies.

“They’re… not giri-choco.”

At that, Midorima seems to be getting worse—if only you had the courage to look him in the eye rather than looking down on the gym floor, you would see him look as if he’s on the verge of crying, cheeks flushed red. He covers his face more blatantly now, while the other one shakily accepts your gracious gift. Miyaji, Ootsubo, and Kimura have to take care not to let their jaw drop down to the ground as they watch the scene unfold. As for Takao, he’s visibly shocked like the others, but there’s a glint of happiness in his eyes like he has been waiting for this moment to happen.

“Stupid…” Midorima murmurs, averting his gaze shyly—should he make eye contact with you, he’ll for sure faint from being overwhelmingly joyful at the fact that you actually like him back. “Why confess now?”

The two of you secretly know that if it weren’t for your sudden burst of bravery, it would take another year or more for him to gather the courage to ask you out first.


Kagami:

“Don’t forget to say ‘I like you’, Kagami-kun.”

Kagami’s usual first reaction of Kuroko sneaking up on him would be shock, but this time things are different. In addition to that, his face gradually turns as red as the strands of his hair, and when he slowly turns to you only to find the shocked look on your face, he feels like burying himself six feet deep.

“Kuroko!!”

“What? I thought you asked me to help you practice?”

You’re left to your own devices as the two friends banter, Kagami shouting at Kuroko most of the time for ‘not having good timing’ or ‘ruining his chances’, but truth be told, their words are nothing but meaningless noises to you—you are very much surprised at what Kuroko just said, not knowing whether the boy with thin presence means it or not. Taking Kagami’s reaction into consideration, it is likely that Kuroko indeed tells the truth, which means…

At this point you’re the one flushed beyond control, but deciding that it’s now or never—the two of you will undoubtedly be too awkward if you get to meet after this incident—you grab a hold of Kagami’s wrist, tugging him with enough strength as you jog out of the classroom. Kagami lets out a slight yelp from the sudden jerk, and his frustration directed at Kuroko is immediately replaced by anxiety as you lead him to a more secluded staircase, away from prying eyes.

“__________! I swear, it’s not what you—”

“I like you, Kagami-kun.”

His eyes widen, panic slowly diffusing into realization as he tries to comprehend your confession. You like him? The whole school year he’s been sending secret glances and watching you from afar, gradually trying to accept the fact that he’s always a bystander. Now here you are, telling him you like him.

“I… don’t know what that was between you and Kuroko-kun,” you say again, eyes down on the ground as if the tiled floors are the most interesting thing in the world, “but if you don’t like me back, it’s okay. I was—I just felt like it was the right thing to do. Telling you I like you, I mean.” You’re rambling now, and your cheeks are starting to gain color. The wrapped homemade chocolates you have been holding in one hand is starting to get cold, you realize—or is it just your senses being numbed, because of Kagami’s lack of response.

“Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say. I-I’m sorry for dragging you all of a sudden…”

Just as you begin your swift escape, Kagami manages to grab your arm. You gasp, unable to release yourself from his strong hold even if you wanted too—you find yourself not wanting to run away, what with him suddenly pressing you against his chest in a tight hug. You can feel his rabbit heartbeat, pumping abnormally fast even as his arms around you tighten. One look to his face will tell you he’s nervous, but hugging you like this feels so right to him he can’t bring himself to let you go despite his apparent embarrassment.

It’s time for him to show you the result of his confession practice.


Kasamatsu:

“Just ask her out already, senpai!”

Kasamatsu’s breath hitches in his throat, the shock causing him to freeze while he’s trying to accept the confectionaries you worked so hard on making. Kise has a knack of pushing his buttons, and Kasamatsu doesn’t know why he didn’t expect this to happen—you, his crush, entered the gym like a freaking angel, wanting to give homemade chocolates to no one other than himself, Kasamatsu Yukio, your upperclassman, and Kise just had to open his stupid mouth.

Under normal circumstances, Kasamatsu would be very, very pissed off at the golden-haired boy, and would undoubtedly resort to kicking Kise repeatedly until he calms down. This time around, he can’t, because look at your face: your mouth shaped into a small “o” (from the surprise, he assumes), your whole body seemingly at a standstill…

He knows he can’t keep his feelings for you a secret anymore, so in the heat of the moment, he encloses a hand around your wrist and walks toward the gym exit, making you follow behind him whether you like it or not.

Your mind is still racing. Kasamatsu is walking in front of you, eerily quiet. What if he’s annoyed of you, that you’ve interrupted practice just for a bag of chocolate cookies? What if he tells you he doesn’t want to see you again? You realize your thoughts seem so far-fetched, and you blame it on your hammering heart and your brain for overthinking every situation possible.

There are not many people around the premises—it’s dusk, and most students are going back home after club activities. You see several couples here and there, holding hands and enjoying each other’s presence more than they usually do, considering that it’s Valentine’s. Somehow you feel a tinge of jealousy tugging at your heartstrings, the want to be one of those people who loves and is loved in return. But you want only his love in return. Kasamatsu stands stone-faced in front of you, gaze focused elsewhere as you try to swallow anticipation like a bitter pill. He looks as if he is about to scold you, and so you brace yourself of what’s to come.

“Listen, __________. I… I like you. A lot.” Kasamatsu’s hardened expression quickly melts into that of embarrassment. “Stupid Kise blew it away already, I guess. I-I’m sorry about that.”

For a second your eyes meet, and like innocent middle-schoolers, both your face and his are flushed pink, and that’s when you’re too shy to continue looking at him. Kasamatsu acts similar, ruffling the hair at the back of his neck as an unintentional reflex to his shyness, but when you stretch your hand out to give him the chocolate again, his attention is all on you.

“Actually, Kasamatsu-senpai, I like you too—I’ve liked you for a while now, um, and these,” you say, placing the bag in his hand, “they’re honmei. For you.”

At that moment, Kasamatsu feels two things he has never felt before: the first being so faint and yet so aware at the same time, and the second feeling so full of happiness he wants to shout it out to the whole world—multiple times, if necessary.

Signs as Cher Horowitz Quotes
  • Aries: "Until mankind is peaceful enough not to have violence on the news, there's no point in taking it out of shows that need it for entertainment value."
  • Taurus: "Dionne and her boyfriend Murray are in this dramatic relationship. I think they've seen that Ike and Tina Turner movie too many times."
  • Gemini: "So like, right now for example. The Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" Well it's like when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I put R.S.V.P. 'cause it was a sit-down dinner. But some people came that like did not R.S.V.P. I was like totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, and squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day it was, like, the more the merrier. And so if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion may I please remind you it does not say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Thank you very much. "
  • Cancer: "Ugh, as if!"
  • Leo: "This is where Dionne lives. She's my friend because we both know what it's like for people to be jealous of us. "
  • Virgo: : "So okay, I don't want to be a traitor to my generation and all but I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and like, we're expected to swoon? I don't think so."
  • Libra: "He dresses better then I do, what would I bring to the relationship?"
  • Scorpio: "Thank you Josh. I SO need lessons from you on how to be cool. Tell me the part about Kenny G again? "
  • Sagittarius: "What's the point? Everywhere you go has valet."
  • Capricorn: "Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie."
  • Aquarius: "Miss Stoeger, I would just like to say that physical education in this school is a disgrace. I mean, standing in line for forty minutes is hardly aerobically effective. I doubt I've worked off the calories in a stick of Carefree gum. "
  • Pisces: "I was just totally clueless."

anonymous asked:

I'm a young minority kid, and i just came out to my mom as Bi. The first thing she said to me was 'Ew' then 'How do you even know'. I had been thinking of telling her for years and now that I did i don't know how to react. I feel that i shouldn't tell anyone else close to me fearing they'll have the same response. I feel I should just hide it, hide my sexuality and my feelings.

they’re from a different generation. my mom said ew too but not like on a “ew ur bi” way but like “ew i can’t imagine myself doing that” they were never brought up with LGBT+ education so they say a lot of dumb things but the fact she’s asking how do you even know means there is hope that she has the potential to be receptive and learn from you. so be patient with her and calmly explain how you feel, that you love her, and that you just want to be honest about your life with her. parents are suckers for that bs

  • Jon: so Arya.. do you like Gendry?
  • Arya: What?! EW! Of course not!! That is so gross! what are you talking about I don't like him at all why are you accusing me of that?! me?? liking gendry?? I definitely don't look at the play of his muscles while his smithing. of course not haha. And when he told me he was gonna sleep with that girl Bella I DEFINITELY didn't think of that for months. why would I? I also don't think he's strong or that time when he called me a nice oak tree? I forgot about that you know. Really insignificant. Didn't even bother me at all ha ha..
  • Jon: ..okay
  • Bran: uhm
  • Sansa: ..i don't even know what to say Arya
  • Robb: well..
  • Gendry: RIght

anonymous asked:

"I know I should ask if you're ready but I don't really care right now" sometimes I wonder what Julie was thinking when she wrote this. There's no going back from this. Ew.

Thats truth right there. Like wtf??? After everything about sexual assault? Jesus

  • Griffin: Yahoo Answers user Oh No asks, "Are females attracted to the penis just as males are attracted to female breasts and butt? Like when a man sees female boobs and butt they go 'Boing', lol, I am immature. Is it the same thing when woman sees a male penis or are they like, 'ew'?"
  • Justin: Yeah, it's like ew.
  • Travis: No, no, no, it's lady bone zone.
  • Griffin: I can't believe that's a thing. I can't believe that's a thing, Travis. I can't believe that a lady sees a boner and goes mhm, yes please.
  • Travis: Oh no not a boner, just a penis.
  • Griffin: A flaccid penis.
  • Justin: I don't think the reaction could possibly be 'Oh yes'. I think - I'm not a lady. If I had to guess I would imagine the reaction's something more kin to, 'Well, here we are'.
  • Griffin: 'Well, we need those to make more life, so.'
  • ...
  • Griffin: I can barely - like, when I'm in the shower hangin' brain, I can barely observe my own thing without getting a little sick.
  • Justin: I can't see my own without a complicated network of mirrors and volunteers, so.
  • Travis: I have someone come in and describe it to me every day.
  • Justin: I have Leonardo DiCaprio come in and sketch it. We have to be on a boat though or I can't finish.
  • Griffin: I wish that Morgan Freeman delivered my penis report. My daily penis briefing.
  • Illumi: I think I may have found a reason why I hang out with you a lot
  • Hisoka: Hmm. And why is that?
  • Illumi: My weapon of choice is the needle
  • Hisoka: Yea. So?
  • Illumi: You remind me of the sensation given by my weapon
  • Hisoka: How's that?
  • Illumi: You're a prick.
  • Hisoka: Excuse me?
  • Illumi: Well, you are.
  • Hisoka: Don't you mean, you like being around my big prick?
  • Illumi: Excuse me?
  • Hisoka: Come on, Illumi. Admit it ~
  • Illumi: Ew, gross.

I feel like Neil doesn’t eat a lot and Andrew eats double his body weight every meal and when the Foxes order takeout Andrew will eat his whole meal and Neil shares his with Andrew because he knows he can’t eat the whole thing and it’s very romantic. Andrew shoves a piece of chicken down Neil’s throat when he says something stupid and he chokes.