I feel so bad for my future children because it's constantly going to be like
  • Me when my kid is crying:Don’t cry for me, Argentinaaaaaaaaaaa….
  • Me when my kids are helping me clean:IT’S THE HARD KNOCK LIFE FOR US
  • Me eating breakfast with my kids:The other one’s still the toast of the town ‘cause he made butter outta cream…
  • Me playing hide and go seek with my kids:SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME, LOOOOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY!!
  • Me waking my kids up in the morning:Maybe we can frighten away the ghost of so many years with a little ILLUMINATION *flicks on lights*
  • Me when my kid has a crush:SHE’S IN LOOOOOOVEEEEEEE, SHE’S IN LOOOOOOOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
  • Me when my kid tries to run away:THEREEEEE, OUT IN THE DARKNESSSSSS… A FUGITIVE RUNNINGGGG…
  • Me giving my kids advice:If you only follow your heart…
  • Me when my kid gets their first boyfriend/girlfriend:OMIGOD OMIGOD YOU GUYS
  • Me when my kids are mad at me:TAKE ME BAAAABBBYYYYYYY, OR LEAVE MEEEEEEEE
  • Me giving my kids ‘the talk’:Once there was a night, beneath a moonless sky…
  • Me when my kids start driving:GOOOOOO GREASE LIGHTNING YOU BURNING UP THE QUARTER MILEEEEEEE
  • Me when my kids go off to college:Empty chairs and empty tables, where my friends will meet no more…

people who don’t like musicals are people you don’t need in your life

                                                  don’t          you          forget
                                                  what          i’ve            been
                                                  –t    h    r    o    u    g    h–
                                                  and      y e t,      i'm        still
                                                  s    t    a    n    d    i    n    g

in the eye of the hurricane - the last song in a musical before everything goes to shit

hurricane - hamilton // telephone wire - fun home // some things are meant to be - little women: the musical // promise - bare: a pop opera // i don’t care much - cabaret // that face - dogfight // prom climax - carrie // something isn’t right here - bring it on // yo girl - heathers: the musical // waltz for eva and che - evita // not while i’m around - sweeney todd // any moment / moments in the wood - into the woods // talk show - jon & jen // contact - rent // don’t do sadness / blue wind - spring awakening // on the willows - godspell // the long grift - hedwig and the angry inch // bare - bare: a pop opera //

L I S T E N

the signs as Musical Theatre Women
  • Aries:Eva "Evita" Perón (Evita)
  • Taurus:Tracy Turnblad (Hairspray)
  • Gemini:Maureen Johnson (Rent)
  • Cancer:Galinda "Glinda" Upland (Wicked)
  • Leo:Fanny Brice (Funny Girl)
  • Virgo:Wendla Bergman (Spring Awakening)
  • Libra:Christine Daaé (The Phantom Of The Opera)
  • Scorpio:The Witch (Into The Woods)
  • Sagittarius:Velma Kelly (Chicago)
  • Capricorn:Veronica Sawyer (Heathers The Musical)
  • Aquarius:Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family)
  • Pisces:Sally Bowles (Cabaret)
Things Musicals Taught Me
  • The Sound of Music:You can't solve a problem like Maria
  • Phantom of the Opera:Kidnapping, murdering, and setting an opera house on fire is a valid way to get your crush to almost marry you.
  • Book of Mormon:Tomorrow is a Ladder Day
  • Newsies:Now is the time to seize the day
  • West Side Story:A boy like Tony would kill Maria's brother (and he did).
  • Little Shop of Horrors:The meek shall inherit (and then get eaten by the plant they helped make big and strong. How rude.)
  • Evita:She'd be surprisingly good for you.
  • Matilda:Sometimes you've got to be a little bit naughty.
  • Wicked:No one mourns the wicked, even though she's the only one defying gravity.
  • Heathers:You can write some pretty good songs about high schoolers murdering each other...