everythings-bigger-in-texas

It’s day two of Comicpalooza! Are you as excited as I am??! I’m having such a great time here in Houston!  This show is so much fun!  If you’re just making it to the convention today come find me and my goodies at my booth #41!  I’ve got new prints, books, apparel, postcards, stickers, socks, totes, and more!  Please come check it out! I’m here allll day and I’ll be back again tomorrow too!  Plenty of time to visit me and say hello 

Texas Gothic
  • Everything is bigger in Texas. When you hear the rumble of footsteps, go inside. Don’t bother going to the windows; no matter how far you crane your neck, you won’t be able to see their tops.
  • This is the Lone Star State. There were many stars once, but all the rest have been snuffed out. You wonder if it’s just a matter of time.
  • Don’t mess with Texas. Texas remembers. Texas is patient. Texas is persistent.
  • Ford is the best in Texas. The coup was not subtle. The metallic screeches of the old regime’s trucks were uncomfortably human.
  • There’s another new Whataburger around the corner. It’s the fifth one this month. You snuck past the warning tape on a construction site once and you could swear it was growing out of the ground like a tumor.
  • Everybody loves the cowboy hats, especially when the Rodeo rolls around. Some people never take them off. There’s something hiding underneath them.
  • You’re driving along I-10 and a deer leaps out into the rode. You slam on your breaks, but you know you won’t make it and you shut your eyes. When you open them, the deer is beside the road, looking not at your car but at you. Its eyes glow in the moonlight alongside hundreds of others. They know your face now.
  • The buzzards are following you. They’re in the trees when you eat your lunch. They’re on your car when you clock out. They’re on your home, dozens and dozens, all watching you. Waiting.
  • Eagle Ford Shale is booming. The earth splits and the oil pours forth. The ground rumbles, but the fracking ended weeks ago. They’ve woken up.
  • Amarillo isn’t. It’s many colors. The homeless, though, they wear it. Kings in yellow, on more and more corners. They don’t beg anymore. They demand. You’re afraid to say no.
  • No fireworks. If you use them, things might burn. If things burn, they might never stop. The rain won’t come. It will never come.

anonymous asked:

So here's a inappropriate/awkward/embarrassing, all those category questions. Who do you think has the.. umm.. bigger package between Jared, Jensen, and Misha? But if it is actually Jared in that "adult video" then it's safe to say everything is bigger in Texas. I just want to know your smutty analysis, for science obviously.

Okay– first things first … WHAT ADULT VIDEO????

*heavy breathing*

Um okay … anyway.

Back to the cock-question:

I think Jared does probably have the largest in regard to length, because everything about that man is longer than the average.

I think Misha is probably thicker though– he has a nice bit of girth that would definitely make someone walk funny the next day.

Jensen is long and thick– not quite as long as Jared, but just as thick as Misha … and fuck I’m going straight to hell.

Texas gothic

• “Don’t mess with Texas” they repeat. Over and over, you don’t know why or what it means but you don’t question it. You fear what will happen if you do.
• It’s summer again you don’t remember when the last time it wasn’t summer was. It’s getting out of hand your ac is screaming.
• “The stars at night are big and bright” you chant with the others and clap 4 times “deep in the heart of Texas.” When did you learn this? When did anyone learn this? But you don’t question it. No one questions it.
• You pledge to Texas right after the US, you fear what will happen if you don’t. What wrath it might invoke.
• There are bluebonnet on the side of the highway. They weren’t there yesterday. They call you. They beckon everyone to take pictures. You don’t dare pick one, no one does. “It’s illegal to pick the state flower.” Is repeated in whispers. You don’t know what happened to the last person who said it was ok to pick them no one does.
• Homecoming, it’s always homecoming. The mums are everywhere some girls you see are more mun than girl. You fear they are being consumed by the ribbons. You say nothing. “Are you going to the homecoming game?” Of course you are everyone does. Though you don’t understand this tradition, it’s key to not infuriate some sleeping football god.
• Baseball, you don’t play sports, never have. You’ve never even watched a game of baseball but you know all the rules. Of course you do this is Texas.
• There is a gun being passed down in your family, “you will get it next” they repeat “it’s a great honor” you don’t question it. Because you know it will anger the spirits if you don’t continue the tradition.
• There’s a new Wattaburger. you don’t remember it being there before. You don’t remember its construction. It’s always been there hasn’t it?
• You don’t have horses. You’ve never ridden a horse. But you know how. It’s in your blood.
• You don’t remember the last time you weren’t sweating. You swear you would make a deal with a demon for some rain. You almost resort to going to the crossroads. They say it worked last time. You know children who have never seen rain.
• You don’t remember buying cowboy boots. But they’re there in the back of your closet. They always have been.
• You enter the diner, everyone stares at you. The waitress has red lipstick on her teeth. No one points it out. She calls you “hun”
• Everything is deep fried, you begin to wonder if you are deep fried.
• Everything is shaped like Texas. The shape has lost all meaning.
• “Everything is bigger in Texas” they cheer like its a good thing. They momentarily forget about the things that lurk outside your house at night. Those are bigger in Texas too.
• The bugs seek shelter in your home. People say they’re just looking for water. But is that all?
• “Bless you heart!” The old ladies cry. They sound angry, you are embarrassed though you don’t know why. “Bless you’re heart!” Rings over and over.
• There’s another Baptist church on that street corner. Was it always there? Of course it was. But something tells you it wasn’t.

Texas Gothic

•You go outside into the blistering sun. It is around 70 degrees out. You go back inside, it is unbearably, brain-numbingly cold, it is around 70 degrees there too. It is always around 70 degrees no matter where you go.

•You take a trip downtown, suddenly you’re in a horse driven carriage on a brick road in the 1800’s yet nothing has changed, everything returns to normal down the next street flickering back into modern day.

•There’s a whataburger a couple blocks away, there always is, even in the life barren wastes of the desert you see an orange and white restaurant in the distance, you look behind you and there is another, they are closing in on you.

•There are people speaking and writing Spanish everywhere, some parts of town are entirely in Spanish, your uncle speaks Spanish, sometimes you speak Spanish, you have forgotten the difference between the english and Spanish languages and now there is only words you can understand and words you sometimes cannot.

•A foreigner walks into town and utters the words “You all” everyone is staring at them now in anger and disbelief, everyone falls silent around them now giving them nothing but glares and looks of utter confusion. No one has said such words like that in Texas in thousands of years.

•Your friend brings some candy back from their trip to Mexico, the writing on the wrapper appears to be a collection of ancient ruins, the candy itself resembles crystallized darkness pulsating with the damned souls of a hundred conquistadors, maybe they used to put cocaine in it.

•They say “Everything is bigger in Texas” and they are right, everything is so so massive, you cannot reach the seat of your chair, your iced tea towers over you, you live in fear of your cat.

6

Currently on a short vacation at Texas~
The first two pics are of stuff I bought. I wasn’t expecting a Daiso to be at the mall I went to but regardless it was a nice cherry on top of the little trip. Everything there was so cute and I couldn’t resist…

I also compiled some pics from the arcade I went to. Tekken 7 was there along with some free pamphlets so I took one just as a reminder. Probably the funnest arcade I’ve ever been to. They even had one of those cute photo Japanese booths that take pics of you and a friend. I tried it along with my bro @stoopidpencil, but of course those pics are private.