every talks

Me: ah watching the snow is so calming

Also me: the feeling of pseudo-calm numbness I experience when watching snow fall is wrapped around trauma and past suicidal ideations that led to sleepless nights staring blankly out my window and embracing this numbness and repeating this behavior despite being in a much better place is probably unhealthy and something I should evaluate

Me, unblinking: love that snow

So I’m catching up on Mark playing Cuphead and hearing him talking about the production and cost of Who Killed Markiplier and A Date With Markiplier is just warming my heart.

For one, paying as much as he said and coming away with LOOSING money from that project while still maintaining a positive attitude about it is really something special.

But also, just like, you can tell he was passionate about the project no matter the cost.  Mark just wants to make cool things and I’m sitting here about to cry because that is all I have ever wanted to do and seeing him just smile and push through these challenges and projects is so inspirational.

I can only dream of working on a production the likes of his one day.  Just to feel the same way he feels about everything he does.  I really want to feel that about the things I make.  I admire you so much Mark.  I really hope that if I do end up making cool things, it would be things you would be proud of yourself as a creator.

I’m really a small creator - rather insignificant in the grand scheme of things - but I am always going to make things, and a lot of that motivation is thanks to you, Mark

also just as one final comment, I really thought at the very least, after the amount of quite bad press this whole Ash London thing has gotten Louis, he would have the sense to try to make some type of mend (or at the very least, ignore it). Like even if you personally have no issue with your fans en masse sending death threats, at least from a PR perspective, maybe you’d want to do better than telling your fans 3 days of death threats was sufficient for this particular slight to his dignity, and he looks forward to them similarly “having his back” next time

okay this is a rant sorry this is so long BUT

im soooo fucking tired of people (especially boys) telling me to stop worrying about my grades so much!!!!!! sorry that im busting my ass so i can be a successful surgeon!!!!! sorry im an ambitious woman!!! like i get that YOU wanna sit on ur ass all day and play video games but stop projecting on me!!!!! as a woman im going to have to work twice as hard to be recognized as a surgeon but yeah. i worry too fucking much right??

my bpd ass: i have literally no idea who i am

some fucko: but do any of us really know WHO we are? surely it is the deepest part of human nature to question existence, and wh-

me: thanks denise, but every time i look in a mirror i dissociate five inches to the left, i forget what my name is, and if you asked me what things i enjoy i would be UNABLE to tell you unless i had already made a list

Guess what I’ve been playing this Summer.

 11/10 would romance bird/bug/cat boy again 

If the US makes drama about Coco I’m gonna kick some asses because it’s been out in Mexico for a week and we all love it and cried our eyes off.

Go, enjoy the art, love our culture, learn the songs and cry.

It’s truly a masterpiece, I can’t express how much I loved that movie and how it makes me feel to see my country represented like that, in such an accurate way and so beautifully. Thank you, Pixar.