every single second of his existence

The shadows dancing across the discolored motel wall didn’t break Cas’ line of sight. His eyes were well trained by now, trained to watch over the single purest piece of humanity he had ever seemed to know in his existence. The days come and go, the leaves fall and frozen rain swirls, but something never changes. The way Cas’ heart aches when his eyes meets the sleeping face of the man he’d give up the world for.

Raking leaves, chomping on diner burgers, grease-stained from patching up Baby… every time Castiel was given even a second to see Dean Winchester in all of his greatness… he couldn’t help but yearn. Yearning was forbidden, it was not meant for the angelic being he was raised to be. But it didn’t stop him every time he heard a crackling fit of laughter.

His yearning made him fall, it embedded in his grace a sense of hope that became his heavenly downfall. There was no coming back from these feelings, these realizations that Dean Winchester made heaven a pale prison. Which is why Castiel finds himself in these motel rooms, that reek of sin and abandonment, on a nightly basis.

Sometimes he wishes he was strong enough to say something in these silent moments. He wishes he could part his parched lips and tell Dean, even if he won’t hear it, that he loves him. But he knows that it isn’t his place, that he doesn’t deserve Dean’s love or his trust anymore. He’s hurt him, betrayed him, too many times for him to be forgiven.

And still he yearns. He yearns and yearns in silence.

Tonight he was too tired. He left with a brisk flutter of his wings.


The sound of wings flickering opened Dean’s eyes. He stared at the ceiling, a pit in his stomach, wondering why his guardian angel left so early this night. Most nights he could sense Cas’ eyes on him until the brisk rays of morning poured onto his skin.

It wasn’t that Dean was scared to let Cas know he was awake, maybe he thought Cas could sense he was awake, all he knew was that he couldn’t risk it. He couldn’t rest anymore without Cas near, couldn’t close his eyes without seeing nightmares unless his angel was watching over him. It was pathetic, a little needy, but Dean was too tired in life to fight it.

Watching the shadows race across the walls, he wondered idly if he would see Cas in the morning. Maybe they’d talk on the phone. Knowing the angel loved being included in ‘pop culture’ like ‘using a cellphone’ he tried to call Cas as often as possible.

But he missed praying. Praying to Cas had gotten him through a lot of shit these past years. He’d never admit it, took him a while to admit it to himself, but it was his saving grace.

Closing his eyes, Dean fought for a fitful slumber filled with blue eyes and burnt wings. Maybe tomorrow he’d tell Cas. He’d tell him he loved him, tell him he needed him more than ever, but for now he would pray that his angel would return to watch over him.

History reaction | Watching you at a show because you takes preforming arts as a college course

Kyungil: He’d watch you in silence. But he’d be so silent because he completly he’d be completly and utterly amazed by your preformace. He couldn’t take his eyes off you. At this moment nothing exists but you. 

Originally posted by sweetsangho

Dokyun: He’d be so proud of you! He’d sit there and smile wouldn’t leave his face for a single second. Every time your eyes would meet his, he’d give you thumbs up and his sweetest encouraging smile. Have I mention he’d be proud of you? Yes? Well, I’ll say it again: He’d be freaking proud of you!

Originally posted by trainingpanda

Sihyoung: Oh gosh his heart would pound like crazy and he’d have butterflies in his belly while watching you perform. With each passing second he’d be more and more in love with you even through he was pretty sure he can’t love you more. At the end of your performance he’d be one of people who clapped standing.

Originally posted by monxbebe

Jaeho: I can clearly imagine him bouncing in his seat with the brightest smile on his face. He’d be one of the loudest people in the audience, cheer for you and waving at you all the time. In the end he’d most likely be more distracting than helping but hey he couldn’t help himself because he loves you so much.

Originally posted by mauloveskpop

Yijeong: “This is my ____! Can you see them? They’re right there! Look! Aren’t they extremly talented?”
He’d be the one constantly poking people sitting around him, pointing at you and telling them how proud he is of you and how amazing you are, with almost literal heart-eyes.

Originally posted by rapmon2

not my gifs | requests open

For anon! Thank you for requesting dearie and sorry you had to wait so long for this one (≧∇≦*)

Also I’m really sorry for any typos and grammar mistakes. My beta-reader doesn’t have time rn

The bus

You take the bus to school and you hate everything about it. Sitting alone, just watching out the window not knowing what to do. The only thing that you like about taking the bus is the fact that c/n takes the same bus as you. Well…you usually just stare at the back of his head most of the time. He’s in 2 of your classes but he probably doesn’t know that you exist but everything about him attracts you.

You walk up the bus steps, running your hands over the rail. You pay the money to get onto the bus, and walk all the way to the back of the bus find your usual spot; the second to last row. This is the part where you hope no one sits next to you.

Everyone boards the bus and pretty much every single seat of the bus is filled. You congratulate yourself because no one had sat next to you. We approach the stop that crush name is picked up at, and he walks up the bus. He looks for his friends on the bus. “Aw thanks for saving me a seat, mate,” he laughs. 

He searches the bus looking for an empty seat. His eye spots the seat next to yours and he starts walking. He throws his bag to the ground, and sits right next to you. Your stomach does a flip for a second. 

 "Hey, y/n right?“ He says looking directly into your eyes. You feel your whole faces burning up. You wonder how he knows your name, you were this quiet girl that no one notices. He was the loud, funny one. 

 "Yeah, c/n?" 

 "How’d you know?” he laughs softly. 

 "Lucky guess,“ You say, and he laughs. 

You two sit there for the rest of the bus ride really awkwardly. The bus is noisy, you fiddle around with your hands and stare out the window waiting for the awkwardness to be over. It feels like c/n is looking at you, but you doubt it. 

The bus finally approaches school and your relieved that all this awkwardness is over. But the likeliness that c/n actually likes you back is slim to none. We both grab our bags at the same time, and wait for the middle of the bus is empty so we can go out. Once there is enough space to exit, c/n stands up. He turns his head to me for a split second then back. Then he looks over at me, but not directly into my eyes. 

“Uh, y/n?” he calls quietly. 

“Yeah?” you reply. He stands closer to you so now your bodies are only inches from each other.

“I…um. I like you,” he says staring behind you. Your shocked, very shocked. How could someone like c/n like someone like me, you think, “Oh, ok its fine if you don’t like me back…”

“Wait no, I do, I like you, I’ve always like you, I like you very much,” then you realise what you just said and you face burns red even more. You two just gaze into each others eyes. And your faces lean closer to each other till his soft, beautiful lips are touching yours. He cups you cheek in his hands, and kisses you. 

“You two love birds down over there?” you hear; the bus driver. You look at the bus driver, then at each other; your faces bright red. 

“Well guess we gotta go…” he says smiling at you, “maybe do this another time?”

“Of course,” you smile.

anonymous asked:

I just saw something interesting on another blog and I have to request this. The reader is a fictional character and the boys are the ones crushing on her/him ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

(Dude, the idea is so genius!)

Tetsurō Kuroo:

  • Kuroo is chiller than you’d expect him to be. Not everyone needs to know he has a crush on a person that doesn’t even exist on the same universe as him. He’d just be amazed how strange your heart can react to certain people.
  • He did tell Kenma about it and if he wants to hear it, Kuroo will sometimes talk to him about his crush, as ridiculous or strange it may be.
  • He read their wiki page a lot of times and knows every fact there is to know about them. Ask him anything and he won’t hesitate a single second to answer your questions.
  • Sometimes at night, he makes these scenarios in his head with different settings in which he could meet them, thinking that he’d act so slick and smooth, when in reality he might chicken out and act like a dork.

Nobuyuki Kai:

  • If it was a real life person, it would be pretty easy to notice that Kai has a crush. But in this situation, it’s not something you could just pick up from his behavior.
  • Kai likes expressing his opinions on his crush and discussing them with the others, explaining why he thinks they are amazing.
  • He wouldn’t go overboard with the crush he has, to the extent where his room is filled with merch, but I’m sure he gets excited when he finally sees the character on screen.
  • He knows that his feelings would wear off once he finds another favorite character, so he doesn’t make a big deal out of the situation.

Morisuke Yaku:

  • Yaku would better be dead than accept he has a crush, moreover on a fictional being. He would never hear the end of Lev and Kuroo’s teasing. He’d just claim that the character is cool and there’s no way anyone wouldn’t appreciate them.
  • He has absolutely read reader insert fanfictions before and felt about it later, because it was silly to get head over heels for someone unreal.
  • If the character is from a TV series or anime, he’d have the intros and outros on his phone, which makes him think about them and smile.
  • He loves strong characters who fight for what they believe in and that probably fills him with energy and determination.

Taketora Yamamoto:

  • Yamamoto will fight anyone and everyone who has something against his favorite character. He will totally kick someone’s ass just because they claimed something they didn’t like about them.
  • Just as well, Yama’s ears would perk up immediately if said character’s name is mentioned in a conversation somewhere around him and he’d feel the need to butt in.
  • Totally has a crush on more than one character, finding the ladies in stories or movies so amazing and the guys so badass.
  • If you catch him awake at midnight, you’ll never get out of a never ending rant about how his crush deserved so much more in the last episode he has watched.

Kenma Kozume:

  • I’m 100% sure Kenma’s crush would be a playable character in one of his video games and he always picks them, no matter if the level might be unsuitable for said character. He’ll always find a way to nail it.
  • If anyone were to point out that he has a fixation with them in his game, he would brush it off, highlighting some advantages that the character brings him.
  • Probably only Kuroo knows about his tiny crush and he teases him a lot, but totally understands it. Who hasn’t had a crush on a fictional person before?
  • Kenma would probably carry a phone chain or key-chain with the character he likes, the only merch he wouldn’t feel embarrassed owning.

Shōhei Fukunaga:

  • This guy feels so awkward about his crush, because he wants to talk about this amazing character he likes, but he’s afraid not to become irking or to seem obsessed.
  • Fukunaga tends to like more remote characters, or secondary ones, that don’t play such a big part in the story line, but are awesome in their own way.
  • For the same reason he fears talking about them, because he doesn’t want to get shit from others ‘cause he sympathizes with said charas.
  • Although, if he does find someone who shares the same interest, he would feel calmer to share his ideas and feelings.

Sō Inuoka:

  • If Inu has a crush, expect all of his friends to know how super that person is! No less if it’s a character from a movie, book or game. 
  • He would be really excited to share what he knows and likes about them with his friends and if you get him going, he won’t stop talking very soon.
  • His phone’s homescreen and lockscreen are these fabulous fanarts that everyone adores and envies. If someone was to observe them, Inuoka would be more than happy to tell the person about them.
  • Once he spent almost 2 hours on the phone with Shibayama, discussing about their favorite characters and how awesome would it be if they were real.

Lev Haiba:

  • Just like Inuoka, Lev is very verbal about his crush and would talk to anyone who was to listen to him. He has no regrets.
  • He has so much merch, like, where does he even get the money for it? He has official posters, books, probably one of those 7 inch tall figurines that everyone wishes to have.
  • Lev likes to imagine that if he belonged to their universe, he would be badass and strong and have super abilities, even if he knows that in real like he’s not that great.
  • Yaku blocked his number once because he kept spamming him with messages at 3 a.m. on how cute the character was in different episodes.

Yuki Shibayama:

  • Shibayama sometimes finds himself doodling the face of his crush in his notebooks during classes when he’s bored. He usually shows them to Inuoka afterwards.
  • Also, he and Inu are always trash together about their faves, sending photos and videos to each other on social media and laughing about them.
  • He has an original poster or pictures of them in his closet, so he doesn’t need to be embarrassed in case someone comes over.

You were with him; sitting under the ocean of stars above, holding hands while sharing thoughts.  You just can’t help but to smile because in every words he say, it just reminds you of why you fell for him. Not because of the flowery words nor metaphors he makes just to make butterflies on your stomach. Simply because, he is him. He has his unique style that makes you fall in love in every single move he make.

You woke up. Realizing that everything you have only exist in your dreams. That he never loved you the way you thought he did. That he never missed you the way you do every single second. And he will never will. Then, you’d ask yourself if you should you be thankful for the day you’ve woke up from the dream you thought would last forever.

It still breaks your heart, seeing a photo of him on your room. It still breaks your heart, hearing his name from your friend’s mouth. And when they talk about how happy he is right now, you can’t help but to ask yourself when will you be able to find your happiness without finding him.

You will try. You will try to get rid of the things that remind you of him. You will try to delete his number from your contact, but damn, it’s saved in your mind. You will try to delete his photos from your gallery and will burn all of the photos with him, but you knew how his eyes looks like and how his lips was curved, cos you crave for it everyday. You will try to fall out of love, but you knew you couldn’t cos no one could fall out of love, all we know is to fall in love and fall apart.

You will see him in the middle of the crowd, wearing his smile you once fall into. His eyes, speaking, as if it tells you that he’s happy without you. You managed to keep your heart off, for he is now in love with somebody else. But the feelings are still on, and you can’t find the way out of it. For how many times you tried to forget, fate pulls you back to where you are lost – in the memories he left.

—  five waves of memories
Invest in Your Characters. (part 1)

There is so much that goes into making a real and believable character. Real people are made up of our every experience in life; contrary to what some cliches will tell you, no one is defined by “a single moment” in his or her life. That’s not growth; that’s obsession. And obsession happens sometimes, but please don’t see a character whose only motivation is revenge or ambition or fear and think “this character is a well-developed and fully-thought-out human being.”

Think about your favorite characters, whether they come from an existing medium or your own mind; think about their motivations–every single one of them. Think about their grand life goals, then think about the smaller goals they want to achieve within the next few days, things that don’t always add to the “grand plan.” Think about why they want what they want. What is it that makes those things valuable to them? Who taught them what matters and what doesn’t? What do they hold to be true above all else, and what’s proven that to them?

It should also be said that some characters, particularly young characters, are not fully-realized people yet. No one is ever “done” figuring him-/herself out, and it’s only life experience that will move you further along the line to knowing yourself as well as you can. In a lot of stories, that development, that self-discovery is the point of the entire process.

Character growth and interaction should always be your number-one focus. Always. You can have the grandest plot and the most detailed lore and the most extensive world built–but if you don’t have meaningful character interaction, all of that is wasted. I cannot stress this enough: character is always more important than plot/setting/genre/what-have-you. People sometimes say, “if it doesn’t advance the story, don’t include it,” but I have to disagree with that advice; just like I said above, sometimes there are smaller points that don’t serve your main plot directly but speak volumes about your characters. If executed properly, those can be more valuable and effective than any plot-driven scene.

like i’m kind of offended on moftiss’ behalf when ppl say that johnlockers are reading too much into the show. like. reading too much into like. every episode? into every scene? the stuff we’re seeing didn’t just spring into existence from nothing. it’s not random. it’s carefully orchestrated by a team of award-winning professionals. every single second of footage we see is carefully curated. from the vitruvian john to the heart between them at the fireside in the cross keys inn to john thumping his mug on the table when irene flirts with sherlock to the mention of the dancing lessons to damsel in distress to you keep me right to i was so alone and i owe you so much.

all of these things are telling a cohesive story. and you know what? they’re telling it for us. their queer audience who is so hungry to see ourselves onscreen. and so deserving and so patient. we’re ready. we’re desperate. and they’ve made something intricate and beautiful and challenging just for us. some people think they aren’t talented enough to do this, but we know that they are. some people think that they don’t care enough about us to do this, but we know that they do. it’s coming. it’s nearly here. and it’s ours. it’s ours. 


Malec Appreciation Fortnight Day 5: [ What you love most about their first kiss]

So I have watched this scene more times than I can count and every time I watch I find something else I love about it, it may be because of the depth of the scene itself and how beautifully it plays out, or it might be the fact that it makes me wanna cry a little more every single time. either way, it’s a truly lovely scene.

I wanna start with the first gif, that little stare down between the two of them is basically Alec telling Magnus he made his choice he is choosing him in that moment no else exists but the two of them.

Second gif, Alec walking down that aisle with that look of determination on his face and telling his mother “enough” it’s basically equivalent to him saying “this is the choice I’m making accept or don’t I couldn’t care less.” and I absolutely love it.

The third gif, first off Manus’ face before Alec get’s close enough to grab him by the lapels is a moment of ‘are you sure you wanna do this?’ and as soon as Alec pulls him in that moment of questioning is gone because they’re kissing and It’s utterly perfect and nobody can change that moment right there with the two of them where the rest of the world falls away. Also, that last second just before their lips connect you see one last push of determination from Alec and that makes it all the better.

Fourth gif, everyone’s individual reactions are priceless even down to the silent brother in the background, he’s like ‘wasn’t he marrying the blond thirty seconds ago?’. Jace, Izzy, Clary and Simon all look so proud that Alec is doing what makes him happy they also look incredibly proud to know the two of them.

The fifth gif, when Alec pulled back and Magnus chased his lips I literally yelled, like he wasn’t ready for that kiss to be over he wanted more. That eye contact between the two of them before Alec goes back in makes me weak every time cause it’s so intense. Then the little smile on Manus’ lips before they’re fully kissing again wow it’s beautiful.  

Final gif, it’s so much deeper than the first round and I couldn’t be more pleased about that. it’s fuelled with so much want and need from both of them and it makes the kiss all the more better to watch cause you can’t help but be pulled into the kiss and want to watch it a million more times to find more things to love about it.

Open | A ghost from the past

It was the story of his existence. Every single time it looked like he was getting his life in order something happened that forced him to throw it all away. Leaving New York for the second time, or actually third, had been a hard choice but a necessary one. But no matter how often he left or how often he returned, this always felt like his town. So when he walked into Kaden’s birthday party, he did so like he completely belonged there and never had been gone in the first place. There better be booze, or he wouldn’t survive this night.