every single one of us had a crush on him at some point

country singer bitty accidentally writes a hit about nhl player jack

Based on this post about the inspiration for Dolly Parton’s Jolene, which is somehow even gayer than the song itself. Bless you, Dolly.


It had started out so innocently.

Bitty had been tired after hours of this meet n’ greet, and when that tall drink of water walked up to get his autograph, Bitty couldn’t help the words that tumbled out of his mouth.

“Gosh, well aren’t you the most handsome fella I’ve ever seen,” he said, reached for the outstretched CD–CD! Who even bought CDs anymore?–and readied his Sharpie. “What’s your name, hun?”

“Uh, Jack,” the man said, pretty eyes going wide. If he’d been more awake, Bitty might’ve felt bad for making a fan uncomfortable. But if this Jack really were a fan, then he certainly wouldn’t have a problem with another man complimenting him. And besides, he was handsome, with his wide shoulders and high cheekbones and eyes as blue as the summer sky.

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Nerds 1.0 || Peter Parker AU

Prompt - AU where Peter is a high school AP Physics teacher and Y/N is the Anatomy teacher and all their students ship them but they’re too awkward to notice the other one crushing on them, so the students take it into their own hands.

Warning - some vulgar language. extreme cuteness. teen!Avengers  :)))

A/N: btw the narration in this fic might seem a little salty, but that’s only cause I’m really salty right now about some stuff. 

not my gifs

Originally posted by arachnidiot

“Can you overgrown children give me like five minutes of peace?” She tells her overbearing students, they groan. 

“But mom!” Her most annoying student shouted, she rolls her eyes at the boy. Her students had made a habit of calling her mom and it was by far very annoying. 

“Tony, you call me mom one more damn time-”

“Ooh! She said damn, that’s a bad word!” Another one of her troublemaking students shouted from the back of the class. 

“If it’s a bad word, then why would you say it, Barnes?” She retorted, the boy deflated and sat back down. His boyfriend, Steve, laughing and trying to comfort him as his classmates laughed. 

“You guys are high school seniors. I did not sign up to be a teacher to babysit a bunch of five year olds,” she complained, everyone in the class knew she was joking. She was just as rowdy and annoying as they were, it’s why this particular class was her favorite. 

“Come on, Ms. Y/L/N, you know you love us,” Natasha, a troublemaking redhead sitting with her feet up on the desk, said with a barely noticeable smirk on her face. 

“No you’re wrong. You’re all terrible and I hate you,” Y/N lied as she took a sip from her cup of coffee that sat on top of a pile of papers. 

“YOU LOVE US!” Screamed Tony and Clint at the same time, jumping up from their seats and running up to her desk to hug her. 

She couldn’t hide her smile then. Sure they were all extremely annoying and loud, but then again so was she.  

“Actually no. You know who she does love?” Natasha starts, a smirk rising on her face. 

The whole class quiets for a few seconds before they all yell out. 

“MR. PARKER!” 

A red blush rises on Y/N’s cheeks at the mention of the AP Physics and Calculus teacher, Peter Parker. She tried to deny it every single time, but her students knew better. 

“Oh come on guys, not this again!” She whines, and throws her head in an exaggerated exasperated groan. 

Ever since Peter had been hired as the new Physics teacher, the students almost immediately began ‘shipping’ them together. The two of them had became close friends in the blink of an eye seeing as they were both huge science nerds, their students saw this. Continuously teasing the both of them about their crushes. Both of them trying their best to deny, but neither of them could lie well enough to a bunch of teenagers who knew and understood the signs of a crush. 

 “We will bring this up as many times as we can until you guys realize that there’s some major amor going on,” Sam says from the far right row of the class, chewing on his mechanical pencil as he not so discreetly tried to finish his Spanish homework before the bell rang. 

The class agreed with him. 

“Alright fine, we’ll play it like that. How about I bring up the topic of your grades?” She laughs as the majority of the class starts to beg her not to continue.

“That’s what I thought!” She shouts, laughing loudly at the defeated faces of her students.

For the remainder of the class they reviewed the cardiovascular system for the test they were going to have next class. 

The bell rings and the bustling students jumped around in excitement for lunch, “Bye Ms. Y/L/N!” they all shouted. 

“Get out! Go to lunch!” She jokingly yells, they laugh and push each other out of the classroom. 

Y/N smiles to herself and begins to grade papers from another class. 

“Ms. Y/L/N?” She hears a voice say, she looks up and turns her head to see the only freshman student in her class full of seniors. 

“Wanda, what are you still doing here? You should be at lunch,” she says in a concerned tone. 

“I know but I have a test in European History that I have to study for, and I wanted to ask something of you,” she explains. 

“Oh that’s right, I forgot, you have all senior classes. What can I help you with?” 

“Could I get some extra credit or something to raise up my grade? I have a college interview in a few days and they’ll be looking at my grades,” the girl asks, clutching her history textbook in her hands. 

“Wanda, you already have an A in this class…” 

“Yeah, I know but it’s a 99% because of that B that I got on the quiz about the systemic and pulmonary circuits, I was distracted that day,” she wasn’t directly saying it but she was begging for another chance, and Y/N didn’t need any more pressing from her pleading student. 

“Do you want to retake the quiz? I doubt you’ll get another B,” she offers, Wanda’s eyes light up. 

“Yes please!” Y/N chuckles at the young girl's’ enthusiasm and rummages through some folders for an empty sheet of the specific quiz. 

She finds it and hands it to Wanda who hurriedly grabs it and sits at the nearest desk. Wanda finishes the quiz in minutes before finally scribbling her name and class period on top. Y/N grades her paper in front of her, and to no one’s surprise, she got a perfect 100. 

“Oh my god, what a surprise…” Y/N mumbles, Wanda giggles to herself. 

The door opens and the two women turn to look at the door. 

There Mr. Parker stood at the doorway holding a bag of food that smelled strongly of New York takeout, he saw Wanda standing in front of Y/N’s desk and blushed. 

“Should I come back or…?” He trails off. 

“No need Mr. Parker, I was just leaving. Thanks Ms. Y/L/N!” Wanda says as she begins to walk to the door. 

Peter walks into the room and sets the food down on the desk. Y/N looks behind Peter to see Wanda giving her an enthusiastic thumbs up, then pointing at both Y/N and Peter and making a heart with her fingers. Y/N got up and removed her sneaker before chucking it at the girl, Wanda dodged it and quickly left the class. 

Her unmistakable laughter bouncing off the walls of the hallway. 

Y/N sat back down to see Peter looking at her weirdly. “What was that about?” He asked opening the container of takeout food, Y/N blushed immensely. 

“Oh, nothing.”

Wanda runs into the lunchroom in search of her friends, the seniors. 

They sat in their usual table, eating away at the chicken wings that were being served today. 

“Guys! Guys!” She shouts as she nears the table, they turn their heads to look at their freshman friend. 

“What’s up?”

“Ms. Y/L/N and Mr. Parker are in her class right now eating lunch together! He bought her food!” She yells excitedly, the table gasps. 

“Seriously?!” Natasha exclaims. 

“Dead serious.”

“We’re gonna go spy on them, right?” Clint asks, licking the ketchup off his fingers and wiping his hands on his pants. 

“Hell yeah.”

They all snuck out of the lunchroom without getting caught and made their way to Ms. Y/L/N’s classroom. The door had a little rectangular window for them to see through, it wasn’t big enough for all of them but luckily Clint had special access to the school’s air ducts. 

Especially the one in Ms. Y/LN’s classroom. 

He unlocked his phone and FaceTimed Natasha and pointed the camera at the future couple. Outside of the classroom, the group crowded around Natasha and her phone. They all quieted down and watched the two awkwardest and nerdiest people in the world attempt to have a conversation without mentioning science and or Star Wars. 

Both of them failing miserably. 

They had somehow gotten into an incredibly deep conversation about Star Wars conspiracy theories. 

“Oh my god, these fucking nerds!” Tony whispers, the rest of the group agrees. 

“We gotta do something or they’re gonna spiral into a never ending conversation about Darth motherfucking Vader,” Steve says, Bucky nods agreeing with his hunky beefcake. 

“Yeah, someone text Barnes and tell him to do something about this…whatever this is,” Bucky says waving his hand for emphasis.

Tony quickly pulls out his phone, his thumbs running over the screen in a blur. A few seconds later, his eyes read a message on the screen. 

“He wrote, ‘On it ;)’.”

They all began to silently think of what Clint had in store for their two favorite teachers. 

In the air duct, Clint quietly pulled two small rocks from his pocket. He had been planning on throwing them at some kid who messed with him earlier but this was more important. 

The air duct he was hiding in was directly above Y/N’s desk but both her and Peter were facing away from him so this was the perfect opportunity. 

“So I wanted to ask you something and excuse me if it makes you uncomfortable, but…do your students say anything about us…you know– uh, liking each other?” Peter asks, Y/N almost chokes on her teriyaki chicken but hides it with a strong cough. 

“Ehh sometimes, why do you ask?” She lies straight through her teeth and hides her blush by looking down at her lap. 

“Well, because-uh they’re always telling me that you…have a crush on me, and that apparently it’s pretty obvious…” 

Her hands were now numb and she wanted to disintegrate into thin air. 

No shit, you fucking idiot,’ she thought. 

“Uhh well, I-I wouldn’t say obvious b-but, I mean-” she couldn’t think of anything to say and now she really wanted to die. 

Clint couldn’t watch his favorite teacher suffer anymore so he slowly and quietly opens the air duct by removing the detachable air grille. 

He throws the first rock at the door, the two teachers turn to the door thinking that someone had knocked. Y/N stands up to open the door, she looks through the little window but when she sees no one she turns back. 

Then, Clint throws the second rock right into Peter’s shirt causing him to stand up and spill chicken fried rice covered in soy sauce all down Y/N’s t-shirt. 

“Oh shit, fuck! I’m sorry!” He exclaimed trying to apologize. 

He grabbed a few napkins and tried to wipe off the soy sauce stains but only making it worse.

“No, i-it’s fine it-” 

“I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t mean-”

Both were too flustered to let one another finish their sentence. By now Peter wasn’t wiping anything except for her chest, it took a few seconds for both of them to notice exactly what he was touching. 

The blushing idiots finally decided to pull away from each other, and chuckle nervously at their current situation. 

“Come on, come on.” Natasha mumbles under her breath as her and the group continue to watch from her phone. 

Y/N and Peter were now pretending that the whole thing didn’t happen but the stain on Y/N’s light gray shirt said otherwise. Finally, the two of them mustered up enough confidence to actually say something intelligent. 

“Would you like to go out sometime?” They asked simultaneously. 

They both chuckle nervously, “I know it’s not the best time to ask, but…I-I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while and I just didn’t know if you…”

She smiles, “Well I do, and I’d love to go out with you.”

At that moment, the group started cheering completely forgetting that the hallway echoed. 

“Yes OTP!” Sam shouts, almost immediately slapping his hand over his mouth. 

“What the hell?” Y/N mumbles and walks over to the door, seeing their teachers walk toward them the entire group got up and hauled ass back to the lunchroom, the sound of shoes squeaking and stomping on the floor along with the loud swears coming from the teenagers themselves could be heard from inside the classroom. 

Clint watching them run on his phone cursed out loud, “Shit!” he said, his eyes widened. 

Both Peter and Y/N turned to the vent, “Wha-Clint!” Y/N yelled when she realized what was happening. 

There was no point in being quiet now, Clint shimmied down the vent before his teacher crawled in after him. 

Peter and Y/N stood there helpless. 

“I’m gonna kill them.”

“Meddling kids.”

Originally posted by daftprodigy

BONUS:

The next day when the matchmakers walked into Calculus, a class that Peter taught, they all sat next to each other. Being the only people in the school that knew that the two teachers that everyone has been shipping were finally together had its advantages. They’ve been trading test answers for gossip all morning. 

The school was bustling with the news. 

Y/N Y/L/N and Peter Parker were finally together. 

Even Principal Fury and Assistant Principal Hill were excited about it. 

When Peter sees them sitting innocently in their seats, he turns to them. 

“I don’t know whether to say thank you or goodbye, she was pretty angry.”

“Ah, she’ll get over it once you give her that good nerd loving,” Sam jokes, Peter blushes and a tries to hide a very noticeable smile.

“Ew dude, that’s our mom you’re talking about,” Tony says.

Clint perks up.

“Speaking of mom, we’re not calling you dad.”

.

.

.

A/N: I had way too much fun with this. This was mostly about the teen!Avengers, but honestly I live for that AU. 

• MESSAGE ME IF YOU WANT A PART TWO

anonymous asked:

since yoongi has too many Gay Moments you could go over your faves/most gay or smth *shrug emoji*

i wrote out a whole answer to this and accidently closed the tabs but time to start againnnnnnnnnnnnnnn so here are are the ghighlights:

  • cypher pt 3 he raps about turning guys and girls on, and he’s literally using a metaphor about how good he is at giving head to tell you how good he is at rapping
  • agust d is directed at a man and there are a lot of sexual references (tongue technology, fat dick em, etc. )
  • good day from YOUTH (the japanese album) - his verse is soft and gay
  • wishing on a star from YOUTH - also soft and gay
  • that time he travelled all the way back to the dorm for hobi at new years with chicken because he was alone
  • when he said holly (a male dog) and rapmon (a male dog) should date
  • when he spoke about his type in men (older with beards)
  • first love is lowkey gay like the verse about ‘i rejected you then you accepted me back’ or whatever it is and also the fact that it was banned only he could do that with a song about a piano
  • it might have been a translation thing because it was from one of the recent USA interviews but he said that spring day was about a ‘him’
  • the spring day choreo bit where him and jimin are on two sides of the wall i’ve seen in a lot of couple contemporary dance performances it’s like the so you think you can dance contemporary trademark
  • during the rookie king episode where tae and hobi kissed, it was in reference to a film called ‘쌍화점’ (‘A Frozen Flower’) and Yoongi had a) seen it and b) could name the actors and main characters and c) was excited to be able to do so
  • exists
  • touches hobi’s thighs a lot (x)
  • that picture of him lying on the hot air balloon thing that looks like the pride flag
  • when he said his celebrity crush was the male presenter when they were in australia
  • whatever the hell the run episode in the prison was
  • when he was pretending to be yoonji on bts+ he called her ‘girl crush’ which is used to refer to a girl that girls like basically yoonji is a lesbian icon
  • sleeping is gay
  • gets away with everything like only a gay could
  • him and jk’s role in the hyyh series is coded as quite gay tbh in regards to how it’s shot especially the prologue
  • in blood sweat and tears, the film ‘chatroom’ referenced in his scenes has a m/m kiss
  • is good friends with my gay father heechul
  • the gntl boys gloves
  • whatever this was
  • these times where he was just……… gay and couldn’t hold it in here and here
  • he’s pretty left oriented politically from what i can tell which is generally a lot more gay n stuff
  • gay leather subculture looks in that Singles photoshoot
  • used the two guys with a heart between them emoji for the sope livestream 
  • ‘soul partner’
  • has spoken about high school crushes at some point but didn’t he go to an all boys school………………………………………….
  • that time he just……… snuggled into hobi’s arm during rookie king
  • this
  • the fact that his hair has been every colour of the rainbow
  • also that he could fight a hetero and win idk
The Boxer Part Two

Pairing: Y/N and Harry

Word Count: 5K

WARNINGS/TRIGGERS: MENTIONS OF MISCARRIAGE AND PHYSICAL FIGHTS.

Prompt: 

“You’re supposed to be in the hospital gown, it’s why we laid it out for you,” Y/N stated, pointing the pen in her hand at the white gown by his feet.

“I’m not wearing that paper shit,” Harry grumbled, “and I’m perfectly fine to leave.”

“That cut says otherwise,” Y/N says.

Harry watches as she sets down the clipboard and turns on the sink to wash her hands, she’s cute. She’s nothing like the kind Harry would go for. His usual prey would be at the bar, lonely, maybe going through a breakup, but he knew for sure that by the end of the night she would be in his bed. Y/N on the other hand looked like too pure for him, and he hated that look.

From his experience Harry had learned that girls like Y/N believed that they were too good for a guy like him. Girls like Y/N, with an innocent smile, soft skin, and soft voices, tended to only use him for one thing, to make their parents upset. Harry had seen it time and time again, it was only a matter of weeks before the girl would crush his heart and move on to someone better.

“I don’t feel anything,” Harry stated.

Harry had grown numb to just about everything. He couldn’t feel the punches thrown at him, he couldn’t feel his emotions, it all just seemed gone to him. He didn’t mind though, no emotions meant he couldn’t get hurt, and no pain meant he was unstoppable.

or

Boxer Harry Styles highers, incredibly perky Y/N as his on-call nurse.

Part One


Harry wasn’t sure which he hated the most, expression his emotions, or having to handle them.

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Harry laughed happily as he landed on the grass. Draco was only seconds behind him clutching the snitch with a massive grin on his face.
“Good one, Draco.”
“Oh, it wasn’t really a good one. Pretty easy actually.” Draco drawled with a smirk.
Harry laughed again as he shoved Draco’s shoulder. “Whatever, that dive was pretty amazing.” Draco’s smirk became a proud smile. “Come on, let’s go eat something. I’m starving!” Harry said.
The smile morphed into a frown. “No. We each won one, it’s a draw. We have to play another.”
Harry grinned at him. “Let’s leave it a draw.”
Draco arched a brow. “Scared Potter?”
Laughing, Harry slung an arm around his friends shoulders. “Yes, scared you’ll pout and ignore me all day when I beat you.”
Draco sniffed. “First of all, I am not so petty. And who says you’d win anyway? So arrogant, Harry.”
Harry laughed and squeezed his friend in a hug. “Yeah. I’m the arrogant here, Draco.”
Draco gently bumped the side of his head against Harry’s as they walked to the castle. “So long as you know.”

On the following Sunday they found themselves trudging through a mountain of homework, much to Harry’s displeasure. Ron and Hermione had gone for a picnic on the grounds, since Hermione always made sure they were up to date on their work. Sighing Harry dropped his head heavily against the couch. Draco, who was curled up in the corner of the couch next to him, looked up with an arched brow. “Giving up already?”
Harry groaned and closed his eyes. “Yes.” He jerked up when he felt Draco flick him between the eyes. “Hey!” He protested, rubbing the sore spot with his fingers.
“You’d better keep going. Don’t think that you can leave it and get me to help you just because Granger won’t let you fly until it’s done.” He went back to looking at his book.
Harry turned to him with wide eyes. “That is a fantastic idea.” When Draco just let out a soft laugh but otherwise ignored him, Harry moved so he could lie leaning comfortably against Draco’s side. He closed his eyes and let out a relieved sigh.
“Potter!” Draco groaned. “I am absolutely not doing your work for you.” But he didn’t move or shove Harry off, which Harry knew he wouldn’t. After several blissful minutes, right when Harry was sure he was on the cusp of a wonderful dream, he fell to the floor as Draco stood up. He pointed a finger accusingly at Harry, “Do some work, Harry. Or we will go to the library.”
Sighing in defeat, Harry sat up and faced his books once more.

Hours later they were sitting in front of the crackling fire eating Bertie Botts beans. Draco was sprawled across a single seat with his legs hanging across the side while Harry sat on the floor with his legs crossed and back against Draco’s seat. Draco had the box of beans and alternated between taking one and lowering the box for Harry.
Ron and Hermione entered the common room with cheerful greetings. Harry appreciated everyone’s efforts to get along, since he knew it was only for his sake, but he did wish his three best friends were more than just polite to one another.
“Did you have a good picnic?” Draco asked them.
“Oh, yes it was lovely thanks.” Hermione smiled at him. Ron nodded a bit awkwardly at him.
“Oh, Harry. You’ll never guess what.” Ron started, and Hermione shot him a suspicious look. “We saw Terry there, he was in the middle of a big fight, seems like him and his boyfriend broke up.” Hermione’s look of suspicion became one of horror as she tugged on Ron’s hand. Harry’s stomach dropped as he willed Ron not to continue. But he did. “So he’s single now, and you can finally ask him out. I know you used to have a massive crush on him.”
Harry closed his eyes, but the thick silence wouldn’t be ignored. He was so glad he couldn’t see Draco’s expression at that moment. There had been a hundred moments when he meant to come out to Draco. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed or anything. It was just that he really enjoyed their friendship. He didn’t know how they’d become so
comfortable touching each other all the time, but he was scared that it would change if Draco knew. He opened his eyes to find Ron looking from him to Hermione with confusion brewing in his eyes. Hermione was watching Draco carefully, which could only mean that he most definitely wasn’t looking at them.
Harry sighed internally. He cleared his throat. “Uh, thanks.”
Hermione looked at him pitifully and quickly started talking about their day, filling the silence as best she could. She asked about how their studies went, Harry responded and Draco said a word or two.
After suffering through it as long as he could, Harry wished everyone good night. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Draco as he left, but let his hand trail along his shoulder as he walked passed.

The next morning, Harry lingered in bed. If he could, he’d avoid seeing Draco all day. Unfortunately, his last class was potions where they were partners. At breakfast he managed to get away with only a smile and a wave since Draco sat at the Slytherin table still. Harry tried hard to focus on his lessons all day, but he couldn’t deny he was nervous to see him.
When he arrived in potions at the end of the day, Draco was already there with all the ingredients for the days potion. He was chopping furiously when Harry reached him. “Hi, Draco.” He said nervously, fidgeting with the strap on his bag.
“Hi, Potter.” Draco glanced up with a small smile. After a few seconds he rolled his eyes. “Are you going to help or do you expect me to do all the work?”
Harry could have laughed with relief, but he didn’t. He gave Draco a grateful smile which was returned with a small quirk of the lips and they got to work.
The rest of the lesson passed in the same manner as the ones before. After, they walked together to dinner and Harry felt relieved. Until he couldn’t find Draco anywhere after dinner. He went to bed with a sinking feeling.

The week passed in the same pattern. The only time that Harry really saw Draco was during potions, his behavior seemingly unchanged. But Harry missed him. After potions on Friday Harry had had enough. As they walked together to dinner he blurted out. “Where have you been all week?” Grey eyes glanced up from the floor to meet his before flickering away. “I can never find you after dinner.” He said accusingly.
Draco answered softly. “I’ve had detention every day.”
“What?” Harry asked, reaching out to grab Draco’s arm. “For what?”
Turning to face Harry, Draco sighed. “You know how it is, some teachers will make up reasons to punish me.”
Harry frowned and opened his mouth to express his outrage when Draco gave him a defeated smile. “It doesn’t matter. Okay?”
Harry deflated. Draco twitched his arm awkwardly and Harry realized he was still holding him. He let go quickly but noticed the blush on Draco’s cheeks.
He deflated a little more.

On Saturday morning when Harry returned from breakfast he found Draco in the common room with his homework. After fetching his own, he sank down on the couch next to him.
Draco shifted to make more room for him.
After working for a little while Draco got up to get a different textbook and settled down again on the single couch. Harry frowned. He wouldn’t have thought anything about it before, but..
He sighed heavily and tried to focus on his work.

The next day he found himself working alone in the library. When he returned to the common room he found Draco curled up on the single couch with a book. He looked up when Harry entered and frowned slightly. “Where were you today?” He asked.
Harry shrugged, struggling to meet his eyes. “Thought I’d concentrate better in the library.” He moved to walk past where Draco was sitting, when Draco’s hand shot out as if to grab his hand but stopped suddenly, quivered in the air for a moment before disappearing just as fast.
Harry hesitated briefly. With a disappointed sigh he carried on walking.
“Harry.” Draco said.
Harry half turned to face him, an eyebrow raised. Draco cleared his throat. “Would you like to go fly for a bit?” Harry frowned skeptically, unsure of what how he wanted to respond. “There’s enough time for at least one game to end our draw before the light goes.” Draco said, smiling uncertainly. And that’s what got to Harry.
“Yeah, alright.” He answered finally.

The walk to the quidditch pitch was filled with awkward silence. At least it was for Harry. Once they were flying though, Harry felt better.
The light started to go quickly and Harry was scanning rather desperately for the snitch, it was the one he had caught in first year and he was rather sentimental about it. A glint of gold caught his eye and he dove toward it. As he neared it he saw Draco coming in from a different angle, slightly ahead of him. He pushed forward, urging his broom to go faster. At the last moment, he realized Draco would get there first and Harry would barrel into him soon after. Unfortunately, the last moment didn’t give him enough time to stop or change direction. All he could do was slow down to soften the impact.
Thankfully they were low to the ground so when they tumbled over one another and onto the grass, it wasn’t too hard a fall. They rolled and Harry landed half on Draco’s chest with a massive groan. Draco was gasping heavily. Harry lifted himself to quickly pat Draco down for injuries and once he was satisfied that he was fine he fell half onto Draco’s chest again. They caught their breath in silence.
It was the happiest Harry had been all week. Until Draco said, “Two one, Potter.” Harry looked up to see Draco clutching the snitch with a triumphant grin. He laughed and pushed himself up onto an elbow.
“You can’t tell me this one was an easy win.” Harry teased.
“No, I can’t.” Draco chuckled and smiled at Harry. Harry smiled back, happy to have his friend back. He noticed the pink tinge on Draco’s cheeks as Draco’s eyes flickered away and he shifted awkwardly. Harry sat up quickly and Draco scooted away from Harry. His heart sank.
Draco cleared his throat, “Well, let’s go back.” He stood up and retrieved his broom. Harry sat there with his knees bent and his elbows resting on his knees, drowning in unhappiness. He wasn’t going to get his easy friendship back. Draco had walked a few paces back toward the castle when he turned around. “Harry?” He said tentatively.
Harry sighed. “I can’t do this, Draco.” He shoved his hands in his hair and looked away, frustrated.
Draco frowned and came back. “What do you mean?” He asked softly.
“I mean I want you to just freak out about the fact that I didn’t tell you and be honest if you have a problem with who I am. I can’t take this dancing around it. I miss you.” He bit his lip to stop himself. After a long pause he looked up to find Draco staring at him in shock.
“You think I have a problem with who you are?” He asked quietly, which set warning bells off in Harry’s head. “You think I’ve been acting strange because I don’t accept this part of you.” He added. Then he laughed, a self deprecating sound that Harry knew well. Draco lifted a hand to his forehead. “Why wouldn’t you? It’s the obvious conclusion.” He laughed again, a little hysterically this time, which broke Harry out of his daze. He stood up and slowly approached him.
“Well, if it’s not that then what is it?” He asked.
Draco closed his eyes briefly before meeting Harry’s eyes. Harry watched a flush creep up his neck as he seemed to search for words. “Well, I couldn’t exactly be mad at you for not telling me when I’ve been keeping the exact same secret.” His cheeks were a deep pink now. Harry’s ears were ringing.
“What?” He whispered, disbelieving.
Draco gave him a sheepish smile. “Sorry.” Harry could only stare at him. Draco swallowed nervously. “Anyway, I was trying to find the right time to tell you about me. But, as you know, it’s not easy.” He laughed awkwardly again. “And somehow knowing about you made my little crush seem less impossible which is stupid, really I know, so I was just giving myself a bit of space to dispel that illusion. That’s why I got detention everyday. I couldn’t focus, I was useless in class.” His gaze was flickering from Harry’s shoulder, his collar to his throat. Anywhere but his eyes. After a fortifying breath Draco added. “Our friendship is important to me. I didn’t want to mess it up.”
Harry was confused. He was shocked. But he knew that that made him happy. He pulled Draco towards him and wrapped him in a tight hug. “I missed you, you idiot.”
Draco melted into the hug which made Harry’s heart soar. They stood like that for a long time. Eventually Draco pulled back, much to Harry’s regret. Harry searched his gaze. “It’s not impossible, you know. Or an illusion.” He whispered.
Draco’s breath caught. Harry smiled at him. “I don’t think.” Harry amended. But as he watched the moonlight play over Draco’s features he thought it was probably extremely possible. Probable in fact.
Draco watched Harry watch him for the longest time. His look of shock slowly abated until Harry was staring at Draco’s trademark smirk. “You’d better not think that counts as asking me out, because my standards are considerably higher than that.” Harry laughed and Draco smiled before adding, “I’m serious.” With that he turned and started toward the castle. Harry scrambled to catch up.
“I’ll write a poem.” He said.
Draco groaned. “Please don’t. I’m pretty set on saying yes. Don’t make that hard for me to do.”
Harry grinned. Feeling bold, he reached out to grab Draco’s hand as they walked forward. He let out a content sigh when Draco laced their fingers together.

q&a: Kieran

princekierz said:

Hi Cassie. This is about Lady Midnight, not Lord of Shadows, so I may be a little late but anyway. People who hate Kieran are constantly bringing up the fact that he tried to convince Mark that he being with his family again wasn’t real in that note he sent him and I really can’t understand why he did it? What was the true purpose of that note? Can you please tell me? I love Kieran, and I don’t like when people are unfair with him. Thank you.

That’s interesting – I have to admit it never really occurred to me people would be confused by what that note meant/was about. The below contains spoilers but not major ones, so skip if you are avoiding even mild spoilers.

First I should say it’s fine to dislike a character. There is no character I have written or read about that someone hasn’t disliked for some reason. If that character is in a love triangle, multiply that by 100,000,0000000. (That may not be a real number but you get the point.) I’ve been thinking a lot about liking and disliking characters and the act of reading with empathy, which I will get to more at the end of this essay. Right now I’m just going to talk about what that note meant, and the way in which Kieran is a complicated sort of character generally.

We read for lots of reasons. To see our own experience reflected (a “mirror” reading experience) and also to see experiences that are not ours. (A “window” experience.) One of the interesting things about seeing the judgements of Kieran is the expectation that he is meant to act like a mundane human being (one who has dutifully read not just many relationship-help tomes but also all the Shadowhunter books – thanks, Kieran! – and is well acquainted with the Blackthorns despite never having met them). At very least, he is expected to act like a Shadowhunter, and not at all like a Faerie – despite the fact that a Faerie is what he is, and as a Faerie, he is not like us. He does not have typical human cultural beliefs about love (in good and bad ways), or commitment — he doesn’t mind at all whether Mark has sex with other people — or what promises mean, or what is personal space (a ridiculous idea to a Faerie.)

Mostly what I’ve seen complaint-wise about Kieran is that he is manipulative, which is true only to the extent that he has grown up in Faerie, where everyone is manipulative. Because they cannot lie, they have created a complex society of misdirection and manipulation and Kieran, growing up as Prince, would have been raised in the heart of that. He would know no other way to behave, and indeed has only been learning, slowly, different human patterns of behavior. He is actually really terrible at being manipulative — not a patch on Julian, for instance — and mostly he is neither good at it nor does it that often. But we can certainly look at what he has done.

So, on to the note and the vague six words it contains. (I don’t really understand what “he tried to convince Mark that he being with his family again wasn’t real” means, because Mark was obviously with his family and not, say, on a balloon tour of Cappadocia. I don’t think even the Seelie Queen would have tried to convince him otherwise, because that is not manipulation, that is waving your arms around yelling “Mark! They’re dosing you with PCP! That’s not really Ty! It’s a huge bunny!“ which is not going to work and nobody would reasonably think it would.) So I’m just going to gather that some sinister goal is being implied here and talk about why Kieran did send the note.

Remember that none of this is real. Why did Kieran say that? Because he was worried about Mark and thought it was the truth. Not for another reason. I gather there is an assumption that the phrase "remember that none of this is real” is somehow about Mark’s family, but it wasn’t. If Kieran had wanted to say “don’t trust your family” or whatever, he would have said that. The note was about the entire world of the Nephilim. Nor was it anything Kieran didn’t entirely think was true.

Nor was he entirely wrong.

Kieran was cast out of the King’s court because he was well-liked and the King saw him as a threat. He spent his years in the Wild Hunt with Mark watching as Mark’s heart broke every single night when he counted out his family’s names on the stars. He felt Mark’s agony when Mark saw Simon, and thought Simon had come to bring him back to the Nephilim, only to find out the Shadowhunters had abandoned him like garbage. Experiencing the agony of someone you love is worse than experiencing your own. After living through the horror of Mark’s despair and crushing loss, is it particularly surprising that Kieran might be wary of Mark getting attached to his family again only to be ripped away from them again – which is in fact what pretty much everyone in Lady Midnight thought was going to happen? Like, nobody thought this majorly fuckerated offer from the Fair Folk was likely to have a good outcome? Julian was terrified what it meant for the kids and thought it might be better if Mark had never come back? Kieran is unlikely to have a more positive view of the kindliness and honestly of the Clave (or the Courts of Fae) than Julian does.

Here is what Kieran knows to be fact:

Shadowhunters hate Faeries.

Mark was abandoned by his people. The Nephilim, certainly, his family, perhaps. Kieran knows they never tried to get in touch with Mark, and he is unaware of the Blackthorns’ complicated circumstances, that they were forbidden to look for Mark, and that they needed to protect Helen. There is no way he would know about those things, unless he had read the books. (Read the books, Kieran!).

He knows the Shadowhunters have enacted the Cold Peace, a series of racist laws punishing Faeries. He knows Mark will be in danger from this.

He has no reason not to think that when Mark is returned to the world of the Nephilim, using his family as bait, they won’t chop his damn head off.

That is what Kieran is urging Mark not to think is real. Nephilim promises. The idea that he will be safe outside Faerie in the Shadowhunter world. And Kieran is not exactly wrong either. We are all glad that Mark is back with his family….and if the Cohort gets into power they might chop his damn head off. Maybe he would have been better off back in the Wild Hunt.

Kieran can’t lie – and he can’t lie in writing either. He said what he said in his note because he was frightened for Mark, and he wanted him to stay safe. In no way did he mean “Your family doesn’t love you,” because if he thought that, he would actually have said it at some point, ever, rather than being incredibly vague in a note that, since he has never said anything remotely like “Your family doesn’t love you” to Mark, Mark would find incomprehensible. Mark understands the note perfectly, because the idea that Nephilim as a group are not trustworthy is not new to him nor is it a huge surprise Kieran would feel that way. (There’s also a lot of numinous stuff to get into about what real and unreal means to faeries, in a magical sense, but there’s no room here, alas.) Kieran has lots of opportunities to say bad things to Mark about his family if he wanted to, but IIRC he never does.

Misguided is not the same as manipulative. To be manipulative means that you’re playing on someone else’s hopes or fears to achieve selfish ends without regard for their well-being. But the idea that Kieran is a cold-hearted bastard who didn’t mean a word of the note (despite not being actually able to lie) and is a consummate actor doesn’t really jibe with anything we actually know or observe about Kieran. Far from having Julian’s ability to play others like guitar strings, mostly Kieran blurts out what he means when he means it and never even tries to pretend otherwise. He can be petulant as hell and annoying, showing up to see Mark when he’s not supposed to and sulking about whether Mark likes someone else. He can be manipulative in the way he sometimes kisses Mark when Mark is trying to be logical because he’s insecure and he trusts Mark’s desire for him even when he can’t convince himself Mark really loves him (but this doesn’t really work, which is what I mean by Kieran not being great at manipulation). He very foolishly interferes with Mark’s dream in Lord of Shadows because he wants to talk and he thinks giving Mark a dream in which they’re having a friendly conversation means he’ll find out what Mark’s hiding. (Which is another example of him not really understanding human issues. All he wants out of the dream is a talk — “Because you are not truthful with me. Your heart is closed and shrouded. I cannot see it,” Kieran said. “I thought, in dreams, perhaps …” — and the dream starts out with them sitting and talking while one bandages the other, and Kieran manages to get in the idea that he knows Mark is lying to him. Things take a sexy turn, but not because of Kieran. He can’t control Mark’s dreams in every detail: if he could, there would be literally zero point in a dream in which he’s hoping Mark will volunteer to tell him the truth. Mark has to have free will in the dream or there’s no point in what Kieran straight-up says the dream is for, and again, Kieran cannot baldfacedly lie. And Kieran is right — Mark is lying to him, in fact the whole family is gaslighting him, which is why it pains Mark when Kieran recalls the phrase “remember that none of this is real.” Because none of it, in this case, IS REAL. Kieran is being lied to by EVERYONE. However, Mark is still right that Kieran shouldn’t be poking at his dreams — and he shouldn’t. Kieran, as a faerie, doesn’t really get that: dreams aren’t private to him, and besides, Mark has allowed Kieran into his dreams before, so Kieran assumes it’ll be okay now, because Mark said it was all right previously. But this is where Kieran needs to learn not to make assumptions, and to value Mark’s privacy even if he doesn’t really get it. Does he? He seems to: he listens to what Mark says, and he never touches his dreams again. In fact, they actually have a pretty useful, healthy conversation about it, though we have to wait until QoAD to see how any breakthroughs they make in LoS play out.)

So yes, Kieran can make spectacularly bad decisions, with the worst of them being when he thought getting Mark hauled back to the Wild Hunt for an infraction was a good idea and wouldn’t result in any collateral damage. And Kieran deserves to be blamed and to feel guilty for that, nor do I mean to excuse him – and I have no interest in doing that; that wrong that he did is a building block of his flawed character. As I saw someone say on twitter the other day, which probably means you’ve all seen it many times, characters are not all either angelic cinnamon rolls or problematic monsters. Like people, because they are intended to reflect people, they exist on a continuum of behavior: some fail and learn, some fail and never learn, some have good intentions and some bad, some grow and change, some are changed by grief or shock or maturity, some cannot grow and are tragic figures. Committing a manipulative act doesn’t damn you forever unless you keep committing manipulative acts forever. If people (and characters) were rendered garbage by past mistakes, there would be no need for therapy or books, since both are about how people learn to change.

As Kieran says: “Everyone is more than one thing. We are more than the single actions we undertake, whether they be good or evil.” That was in Lady Midnight, and it’s possible he was thinking about the fact that he never tells Mark in that book that the reason he wanted Mark brought back to the Wild Hunt so badly – the reason he turned Mark in, hoping he’d be dragged away from the world of Nephilim – was not so that he could date Mark, but because he had been told Mark was going to be murdered. That Mark’s head was going to be chopped off NOW. That doesn’t excuse his behavior, but it makes it a lot less manipulative in two ways: he actually wasn’t acting for a selfish end, but to protect Mark from death, and he never tells Mark that in LM, letting Mark blame him. He lets Mark break up with him and walk away from him with only quiet resignation as a reply. He does nothing to try to make him stay and attempts no manipulation at all, nor is he manipulative when he shows up to help save Tavvy – he offers help, gives it, and expects nothing in return. Only when Kieran is in shock over having been lied to, and his sudden recollection of his own mistakes, does he tell Mark that he was in fear for Mark’s life – which makes a big difference to Mark, who is able to recognize what that means about why Kieran did what he did.

[Kieran said] “Iarlath had hinted you would not be safe in the Shadowhunters’ world. That they were planning to lure you back, only to execute you on some trumped-up charge. I was a fool to believe him. I know it now.”

“Oh,” said Mark. The knowledge unfolded in him, realization edged with relief. “You thought you were saving my life.”

Kieran nodded. “It makes no difference, though. What I did was wrong.”

(Emphasis mine.) Kieran is flawed, he screws up. He is also capable of acts of great nobility – his willingness to testify to protect the Blackthorns at the end of LOS being one of them. Kieran spends LOS being lied to and manipulated by everyone around him while his memory is gone. He is trapped in the Institute, a place so full of anti-Faerie magic that it makes him so sick he can barely eat. He suspects Mark is jerking him around in some way, he turns out to be right, and he’s still willing to testify in the Blackthorns’ defense. He is also able to see when he is/was wrong, and acknowledge it. None of this makes him a perfect person, but it certainly complicates him away from the oversimplified reading that he’s a manipulative horrorshow and that’s the end of the story — especially when a huge chunk of the story has yet to be told.

My suspicion, since there are plenty of other flawed characters in these books stumbling along messing up, is that Kieran’s true crime is being part of a love triangle. Having been through this before I remember well the long essays about how Will was a horrible person and the Wessa relationship was toxic and Jem was a horrible person and that relationship was toxic because dying people should know not to bother other people with their feelings (seriously). That is how people talk about love triangles these days; it seems to be a contest about which relationship is perceived as healthiest, which people are the best and most deserving people of the prize (Tessa, or in this case, Mark). There are a couple problems with that: one that is an unhealthy relationship can become healthy. (It obviously depends on the relationship, some absolutely cannot and should not be fixed, but there would be little need for marriage counselors if relationships could not be made healthier.) The second is that if you want to hate a character, you can convince yourself they are evil even if they spend a whole book saving bunnies, nuns, and salmon who can’t find the salmon cannon, so the arguments do get a bit circular after a while. Certainly I have come across plenty of essays about how Cristina is terrible and should go away because Kieran doesn’t like her (he does like her) and Mark doesn’t want her (not true) and she isn’t so great (I think she is so great and so do they.)

So I will say three things:

1) Kieran is not what is keeping Mark and Cristina apart, any more than Cristina is what is keeping Mark and Kieran apart. Kieran and Mark have a relationship that needs to be worked on to be healthy, and Cristina and Mark have to get to know each other better outside the magic of the binding spell. These things would be true regardless.

2) I know that this essay will garner plenty of people announcing that this means I ship Mark and Kieran or am in love with Kieran, and I know this because this happens whenever I post anything about them, or a piece of fanart of them, even if I post a piece of fanart of Cristina and Mark shortly after. I can only say what I have said for ten years, which is that I don’t ship my own characters or “love” them in the way a fan loves a character — all the characters are pieces of myself in some way or other so that’d feel very odd. I know there may be other authors who feel differently, but I can’t “ship” a couple when I’m primarily interested in their relationships in terms of theme, craft and writing the best story I can — I need the distance of being a reader, not a writer, to “ship” something. (I would also note that male authors rarely ever have people talk about how they’re in love with their characters or they write about them because it’s a “fetish” or “they get off on it”: only women get that narrative, but that’s another post.)

3) I remember reading online that writers should write with “savage empathy.” I’ve always thought that was great advice, as it reminds us to always stay in sympathy with characters and write from a place of their humanity, in all the vastness of humanity’s capability for complexity: for the same person to be capable of immense selfishness and immense nobility, or deep gentleness and great cruelty. It reminds us that we strive to reflect what is human rather than what is either entirely perfect or entirely evil. I feel like it’s also been good advice for me as a reader. It reminds me to look at things from the characters’ point of view, to not expect them to know what I know,* to remember the circumstances of their lives and the ways in which they may behave differently than I would because of the way they were raised/what their culture prioritizes. It has helped me be less judgmental of characters and while I don’t think it’s made me unaware of the problematic, I think it’s made me a happier reader. Even when I don’t forgive, I can understand, and that reminder of the eternal complexity of the human soul, and its capability for change and redemption, has enriched my reading life. It’s wonderful to realize that you can enjoy reading even more than you did before, and I can only hope for the same for all my readers.

*This is why it is pointless to be angry at the Superhero’s girlfriend when he is off saving the city, and you know he is off saving the city but she doesn’t, so she’s just angry he didn’t make it to little Marcia’s bat mitzvah.

Unlucky Nine: A list of antis you may or may not have encountered in the vld fandom

Start Note: When I mention [Ship Name] Anti, it means a shipper of that ship who is also anti of another ship mentioned depending on the context as opposed to Anti-[Ship Name] which is someone who is an anti of the ship mentioned.

I. “Ship K/ance or Sha//ura or my ship instead” anti

These antis are just assholes. They insult other ships that contend to their own. These antis are prevalent in Sheith, Kallura and sometimes Shidge tags.

You get K/ance antis calling Sheith yaoi culture but then they totally change Keith and Lance’s character to fit the same trope. I was so pissed the other day because someone took Lance and just shoved Uke™ on him to fit an AU where he crushes on Keith.

You got K/ance & Sha//ura antis calling Kallura heteronormative but we aren’t the ones who’re forcing a mom troupe on her despite her not being really motherly. (Hunk is the mom friend but let us forget the fat character for aesthetics) You get them saying they love Allura but her story line, which focuses on her duty and willingness to sacrifice anything for it, is shoved for some romance. (Allura, although possibly having some romantic take to it, did not save Shiro because she had a fucking crush on him. She saved him because he needed saving and she viewed his role to Voltron as more important than hers.Stop acting like it is a canon romantic scene. No real scene in Voltron is really inherently romantic.)

You got K/ance shouting if Kallura happens, there won’t be any representation (m/m) but we still got Shiro, Lance and Hunk. Yes, we still got Shunk, Shance and Hance. if we go poly, there is Shunce. And if we dig deeper and you are willing, add Coran into the mix(I’m shoran trash undeniably).

You got them saying Shidge is wrong but the most official thing we got is actually the OFFICIAL Voltron site (whose content probably was made known to the entire crew and was advertised to the general public) saying ‘5 teens.’ But let us dwell on a half-baked video where a person throws numbers into some of the crew’s mouths. Let us not dwell on how Allura has no one bit of an age meter. For all we know, she could be a centuries old Alien. But sure why not, dwell on Shidge.

They put their ships on high pedestals to trample on other ships but you are probably a hateful bitch when you call them out on their shit.

II. “Shiro is spacedad” anti (bonus points for Allura as space mom)

These antis believe Shiro is a grandpa. They seem him as a father figure which would have been okay because let us admit that at some point the space dad joke were funny UNTIL PEOPLE TOOK THEM SERIOUSLY. Unlike the typical fan who laugh at the jab, these people take things to far and actually think it is canon. Shiro is actually a dad. “How dare you hc Shiro as a young and vulnerable character instead of my perfect space dad™?” All that crap.

But if you remember Prisoner Shiro, Kerberos Shiro, he looks pretty young. If you change back his hair before the frosty tips, remove the scar and the buff bara bod (he probably got from fighting in the ring), you wouldn’t find him looking wise beyond his years.

Coupled with Canon™ Space Mom Allura, it just pisses me off. Allura is enigmatic, a bit impulsive but her impulses are mostly practical, not afraid to jump into action, a bit bossy and domineering at times, yes, but deep down inside Allura is just a princess who wants her life back, who wants to live in peace with pretty things like her Altean flowers, who wants to go shopping for sparkly things, and maybe experiment with cute hairstyles.

This is why it kinda pisses me off. The idea was cute. Heck, I made an entire Sha//ura au once with my friend with the whole vld family thing but when they just pushed for it on discourse and acted like it was some holy canon grail, I was just really seven levels of salt.

III. “Pidge is like 4 months old” anti

These antis just infatalize Pidge. “Pidge is a kid. She can’t make romance decision. Pidge is practically a baby. How dare u” and all that shit. But it is totally fine for someone you see as a ‘kid’ to be flying an alien warship and engaging in an intergalactic war? Same goes for those who infantalize other Paladins. The logic is flawed enough but something else really pissed me off in this one.

My main concern with this is that the blatant forcefulness that Pidge is young because she has all the stereotypical looks of younger people. It undermines short girls who never grow up to be tall and developed upfront. Some people never get hit with puberty right. I was thirteen and 5′1 and now I’m  nineteen and guess what? 5′1.5. Where is the justice puberty? You didn’t hit me up. You just poked me with a stick once and left.

And just the other day, guess what? I was again assumed to be like fourteen, especially since I was standing right next to my tree of a younger brother who is like sixteen. I probably would be rich right now if i had a dollar for every single person who thought I was fourteen. Pidge may look young by stereotypical standards, sure. But that doesn’t mean she is. She could just be a short 19 year old.

The concept of child-coded is bullshit. I mean look, I look, by stereotypical anti standard, like a fourteen year old therefore when tall people my age or older (who coincidentally also fit the stereotypical adult look standard) theoretically like me, we are perpetuating pedophilia. If we start dating, since they are adult-coded and I’m child-coded, it’s almost as if it is already pedophilia.

If anything, the infantalization of Pidge showed me that people, yes I repeat, people will continue to be misogynistic to women who do not fit the stereotype of what a woman should be. I mean, when did height and cupsize amount to a woman’s age and maturity as a person? It just says you have to fit this shitty standard to be something and to be recognized and that is fucking bullshit.

Oh well, to the antis, I guess I’ll be a minor forever. And to end this segment with another one of your fave defenses, “I”M MINOR-CODED AND CHILD-CODED SO YOU CAN’T ATTACK ME UWU”

IV. “Shiro’s trauma is an issue” anti

This is by far the one of the things I’ve seen. These people say that because Shiro experienced some traumatizing shit, he is not eligible for a relationship with any of the Paladins. It basically says that because Shiro has ptsd, he can’t date anyone who is potentially(meaning they see this character as young or immature and they aren’t actually as such) less mature™ or younger than he is. It basically says that since Shiro has ptsd, he must be toxic by default. It thrives upon the logic that anyone with mental health issues is gonna be toxic in relationships. (except Sha//ura cuz apparently Shiro who they call toxic in all other relationships isn’t toxic there)

V. “go fucking kill yourself” anti

No explanations needed. Assholes with no regard for human life. Suicide baiting, Gas lighting, you name it. Best thing to do is just block these. No arguing with them.

VI. “I’m a minor/survivor/minority group so I am allowed to be an asshole to anyone” anti

These are the people who go and attack others but when you call them out on their shit, they go like “but we are a minor/survivor/part of a minority.”

I’m only gonna say this once so listen well. (Who am I kidding? I’ve stressed this so much.) Being a minor/survivor/minority does not excuse you from being an asshole. You can experience terrible things and be like fourteen but you can still be an asshole. It does not give you a free pass to ruin other people’s lives. Get that inside your head. Someone can be depressed and still be an asshole. Someone can be autistic and still be an asshole. Someone can be gay and still be an asshole. Someone can be part of a general minority group and still be an asshole. Their status as a minor/minority/survivor DOES NOT make them an asshole but this specific person, who coincidentally fits in a certain group, is just an asshole. Their status is merely circumstantial and not the root of their being an asshole therefor it must not be used as an excuse for them to be one.

VII. “Shaladin is okay except for Shidge ft. Ship Sh/att instead” anti

I’m like WHY? These antis act like they are allies and they are good™ but they throw Shidge under the bus and vilify it to somehow make other shaladin ships appeal to the anti standards. You draw the line in Shidge? Well, I draw the line in vilifying ships to put yours on a pedestal. I would’ve understood if it was just basic ‘I don’t like Shidge’ but no, it has to rhyme with the anti logic of infantalizing her and all those things.

And don’t let me get started on Sh/att. Cuz it just shattered all the hope of me getting into this ship. This was good, old friends trope, I couldn’t save you trope. You name it. It has all the layers of angst that normally i would dive into. But the shippers use the same rhetoric shaladin antis use on Shidge. “It’s shidge but gay” Do you know how misogynistic you sound? And how dare you think I ship my ship because ‘aesthetics uwu’.

The idea of throwing Shidge out to appeal to the antis like some sacrificial lamb is just anti rhetoric itself. “It’s okay if one ships takes the fall for us.” It’s just pointing fingers at someone, in this case some ship. And honestly, that sucks.

VIII. “I’m gonna misuse social justice to call you all these names and not appreciate social justice when it is working against me” anti

These antis are those who try to shit on ships by appealing to twisted social justice but the moment actual social justice works against them, they try to ignore it and you just know, it was never a social issue to begin with.

A perfect example of this are the “Bi Lance for K/ance” antis. They shout and tell the world,”we got Bi Lance, we got a bi character in our ship. Whoop Whoop representation” but moment someone goes “oh nice, I ship Lance with Allura/Pidge/Nyma/Plaxum/any girl in existence.” They jump at you and call you cis het scum or whatever. But Lance is Bi right? Don’t Bi people like umm girls too???? Yes??? Do you know what a bi is?????

You see, they actually don’t care about bi representational at all unless it is used to put their ships up. And don’t get me started on the hate for ‘Bi Keith.’ I know the idea of Gay Keith is a fan fave but Bi Keith is a possibility. Like Bi Lance is everything to the universe but you are suddenly Zarkon if you as much think about Bi Keith. You love bi representation so much don’t you?

Oh and the antis who go like “we are protecting survivors and minors” just as they attack survivors and minors. Good job on the protecting.

Everything these antis do is just plain crap. When you untangle their twisted social justice and see the ulterior motives, you see their actions for what they are, personal vendettas against shippers, attacks so that whatever shitty ship they have gets to trample on other ships.

IX. “fiction is reality” anti

These are just antis who thrive on the idea that fictitious content is actually reality and therefore every dark-themed content is evil.

Tell me why I’m not marking Priests with hot iron stamps fresh from flames and killing them? I read Angels and Demons. Tell me why I’m not suddenly killing humans and eating them? I watched Hannibal. Tell me how I haven’t butchered the person I like? I watched School Days + Higurashi and I was like thirteen, a minor yes, at the time. Tell me how I’m not suddenly taking people in strange boats and making them go through hell, I was eight, a fucking kid, I watched Jigoku Shoujo (Hell Girl). They are unanswerable because fiction is in fact not reality.

The idea that fiction is reality is just the same as how way back four or so years ago, there was a backlash in gaming like with fighting and guns because it supposedly perpetuates violence and supposedly hypnotizes people. And you know how stupid that idea is? That is how stupid the idea that ‘fiction’ is reality’ in fandom is.

And if you actually do think fiction is reality, I suggest you seek medical help.

End Note: Antis may appeal to other forms of attacks or a mix of these but you guys stay strong and safe.

anonymous asked:

could you possibly please rec a couple of your fave fics? ♥️

Ok, so I’m assuming: klance fics? Alright, here we go:

texting fics (I love those kind of fics. They almost always seem to nail characters’ personalities and texting style and are so funny to read. The ones I’ll mention now are my absolute fav from this category):

left on read ✓ by hinatashoyo

Ongoing, funny and although sometimes hits a serious area it’s mostly in a light tone. Pining!Keith.

(For me it’s a big plus, because as you know if you follow me, it’s one of my favourite tropes in Voltron fandom)

little numbers by ashtxns

(I guess you have to be logged in user of AO3 to read that one)

Anyway, ongoing and I suspect it won’t be finished but because of it’s form you don’t get a feeling like you’re left hanging. Super funny. Established klance.

and here comes the blushing groom by hiriki

Completed. Keith and Lance are stucked on a planet which citizens believe they are heroes destined to save them. The thing is they have to get married. Aka: Lance, Pidge, Hunk, Allura and Shiro are texting while Keith.exe stopped working. I don’t remember it very well, but I know I had fun while reading. Also, @xxxkaseixxx recommended it to me, so I already knew it’s a good one before starting.

Legendary Station by BleuSarcelle

Ok, so it’s not really texting fic but it’s a first part of a series where second part is texting fic. You don’t have to read that one to enjoy it’s continuation but I’m strongly reccomending it, because it’s a joy, I remember that one quote (about Keith’s mullet) made me laugh histerically at 3 a.m.

The story is: Voltron is a Radio Station beloging to Allura and her family and: Black, Green, Yellow, Red and Blue are it’s hosts. The station menagers decide that if all radio hosts specialize in certian topics and have already established base of listeners then Station can be even more popular if hosts would be paired with each other. Turns out they were right. Completed.

dance au fics:

i bet you look good on the dancefloor by xShieru

One of the first fics I’ve read in this fandom. I don’t remember it very well but the general impression is that it was quite enjoyable. Except that…pining!lance was…very extremaley thirsty and I’m not very fond of Keith being pictured as some sex object. The fic is well written, it’s not like Keith is dumb but pretty. It’s just when you see him through Lance’s eyes it may be uncomfortable for some people.

Lance, Hunk and Pidge are dancers who strongly admire dancing duo Keith and Shiro. Some stuff happens, Lance goes on dancing camp and guess who’s an instructor? Completed.

Shut Up And Dance With Me by wittyy_name

I’m pretty sure everyone knows this one so I’ll just say it’s pretty great and if you haven’t before you should read this one and also every other fic wrtitten by this author. Ongoing.

I’m Going To Sweep You Off Your Feet   by Adventures_in_Writing

Ongoing. Shiro and Allura are getting married and Keith - as Shiro’s best man - needs to take some dance lesson because it’s important part of a wedding. So he takes them from Allura’s maid of honor - Lance. There is some actual knowledge about dances so it’s cool. Also, Keith’s a florist.

fanatsy kind of fics:

Gate Keeper by MoonlitPaladin (MoonlitStardust)

Scottish folklore, faes, mystery. Lance has a destiny. Really good writing.

Flirting With Death by drippingpen

Now this one is maybe my favourite. It’s hard to decide but there is something about this story that reminds me of a type of books I used to read before discovering fanfiction.

Ongoing. Keith is Grim Reaper. Lance is his first…client?

Of Lions and House Cats  by Ms_Towa

People with super powers are real and known in public because they all belong to Voltron Alliance. Unless they are Galra.

Keith is a superhero. Lance is vigilante that he has to stop. Lance is also a cute boy he has a crush on. Secret identyties. Pining!Keith. Ongoing

coffe shop au (well not exactly but)

Better than coffee by peralta

Also one of the first fics I started reading in this fandom and only recently completed.

Lance is a college student who tries to cut of his addiction to coffee and maybe switch for tea… Keith conviniently is a hot as hell barista in a bubble tea shop. And also college student, double majoring because he’s awesome and perfect and dead inside.

Voltron cafe by PinkHitman

If you know this blog but didn’t read a fic that goes with it, go read it immediately.

It’s kind of like maid/butler cafe where Lance is a butler and his rival from high school his most frequent client. Very very like v e r y pining!Keith. Ongoing.

kind of nsfw/kinky stuff:

Please Drink Resposibly by enjayas

It’s completed and has lots of additional to this au separate fics. All of them great.

Let’s play a game „How much drunk Lance can remember”? Pining!Keith.

Keith is sure that his feelings will forever stay one-sided since Lance is so obviously straight.

Hot singles in your area by rire

Lance calls a girl who gave him her number execpt that she gave him a Sex Line number. Quite cruel, right? But the person on the phone is actually more interesting than that girl anyway, so.

Keith is Sex Line worker, but he’s soo into this that he talks his clients through while solving a sudoku. At least most of them, because one is special. Ongoing, possibly on hiatus.

Crowd Pleaser by WhatTheBodyGraspsNot

Keith gets a job as a bertender and is immediately strongly atrracted to one of club’s dancers: Blue Rider. Too bad Keith’s taken.

This one may be triggering for some people because Keith is in a realtionship with a male OC character who’s manipulative, controlling and once used a violence to make a point.

I put this fic in „kinky” category but it’s actually a very thought out psychological study, excellent writing, some funny scenes too. Ongoing.

College au:

Not That Bad by varelsen

Actually realistic settings. I remember it very fondly. Mutual pining. Completed.

Keith moves in by averagebear

Slow burn torture. Like, really. Agony, but don’t we love it?

Anyway, title kinda tells what it’s about. Hunk decided that Lance as a roommate is too distracing so he moves out but finds Lance a new roommate so he can pay his rent. New roommate turns out to be Keith, Lance’s highschool rival and bisexual awakening. Another one of those where Keith thinks Lance is straight.

Mutual pining. Ongoing.

and for those I don’t really have a category for:

On Thin Ice by Minadora

Keith is a hockey player that needs to practise some grace so he takes ice dancing lessons in Arena where his brother Shiro is an instructor. Keith thinks that Shiro will be his teacher. ha ha. Ha.

Anayway, it’s lovely. Sadly updates are very rare. But the chapters are long so it evens. Ongoing.

Kismet, Kill me by Jessadilla

*sigh* Probably will never be completed and, unfortunetly, it WILL leave you hanging. So keep it in mind if you’ll decide to give it a try.

But I had to put it on a list becacuse it’s one of the first etc etc and there is a sentence that will probably stay with me forever: „Lance is a person of many acqaintances, but very few friends”. And I get it, I so get it. When you’re charismatic you attract people easily. But only some of them will stay with you after knowing you better.

Keith falls in love at first sight but will he still like that charming stranger who’s actually rude, obnoxious and tactless when he’ll spend more time in his company?

….Ongoing. In theory, but it’s been a year so…

Objects in Motion (When Unbalanced) by Mytay

(Actually check out all of this author’s fics!)

This one is about how on every planet that Paladins visit citizens mistake Keith and Lance as a couple. It happens so often that Pidge decides to collect data and analize it from scientfic point of view. Completed.

I hope it was a helpful list~

Edit: I don’t know how could it happen but I forgot to add one more of my most favourite fanfics:

A Commutual Contract by SKayLanphear

Keith witness Lance’s “death” and that experience traumatize him. Later when Lance is A-okay he still needs to check on him and can’t get any sleep due to terrible nightmares. Turns out sleeping near Lance helps him get some rest at night, when he can always make sure his friend’s alive.

Great writing. Interesting study in depression (Lance) and feeling alienated in group (Keith). Ongoing- and I’m personally dying to know what happens next, because resent events sort of left us hanging.

i need me some jealous kara in my life, so of course i did what any person would’ve done and came with a bunch of headcanons to satisfy my own needs because that’s what self care is all about.

  • it all starts one afternoon, they’re downtown in one of lena’s favorite restaurants and kara’s talking excitedly about the new article she’s writing when lena’s phone goes off. usually when they’re together lena ignores it, she always says it’s business associates and insists they can wait but this time lena sees the name on the screen and smiles widely, “oh it’ll be just a minute kara, sorry” kara nods, motions her to go ahead and tries to focus on her pasta until she hears lena giggling “i can’t wait to see you! it’s been, what? six years?” something inside kara twitches. who is she talking to? most importantly who is making her smile like that?! that’s usually her thing. lena keeps talking to whoever is at the other end of the line as if she’s not there, beaming, chuckling… kara’s always believed herself to be someone non violent (for most the time) but she’s now wishing she could grab lena’s phone, throw it to the ground and break it.
  • turns out, lena says to her when they’re on the car ride back to l–corp, that one of her dearest friends from boarding school is planning a visit to national city and called her to see if they could get together, “her name is molly, we were together on science club and we hit it off right away,” kara knows it’s irrational to feel so… heated at the thought of lena hanging out with someone else because damn, she’s her own person and she’s allowed to have as many friends as she’d like but… it makes her extremely uncomfortable to think about lena laughing with someone that is not her. “i have to admit i had a little bit of a crush on her when we were younger,” and kara doesn’t know molly, has never seen her and certainly has no interest in doing it so but she already hates her.
  • “and then she said,” it’s game night, james and winn have paused mortal kombat to listen to her angry rant and alex is staring at her with wide eyes, beer in hand. “oh i used to have a crush on her, as if it’s the most trivial thing on the universe, did you know she was supposed to come tonight? i promised i would let her win at mario kart, but no! molly’s plane lands today and she called to say—i’m so sorry kara, i can’t make it, i’m gonna go pick her up, maybe some other time? can’t molly call herself an uber? does she really need to have lena’s attention all to herself? gosh it makes me so upset someone would be so selfish.” winn opens and closes his mouth a few times, not sure if he should say anything about the whole situation, james and alex are looking at each other, silently deciding on who should be the first to talk until finally alex breaks the silence. “kara… you don’t even know this molly person, didn’t you also say her and lena hand’t seen each other for years? it’s normal that they want to spend time with each other, catch up with what’s been going on in their lives.” kara crosses her arms over her chest and angrily stares out the window, she wants to bury her face on ice cream because though she knows alex is right she still wants to deck molly in the face.
  • lena is never late, if anything she’s always early to arrive to their lunch dates, but for the first time in months, lena luthor is fifteen minutes late and kara’s getting impatient, maybe she got caught up on work and didn’t see the hour, maybe she had to sign some contracts before leaving, maybe… maybe… she tries and call her twice but she doesn’t answer and that’s when kara gets worried, what if something happened to her? what if while she was on her way someone stopped her and hurt her? she’s tempted to alert the deo, tell them to search for lena’s location when she enters the restaurant a little breathless and with her hair disheveled. “kara i am sorry!” she sits down across from her and takes out her coat, “molly came over to my office and we started to talk, i didn’t mean to keep you waiting.” kara’s face goes dark. it’s wednesday, this is supposed to be their day, their afternoon, their time to be with one another without people interrupting and of course molly had to come and ruin it. “did you know molly has a motorbike? she dropped me off!” oh amazing, molly owes a motorbike, so does half the population of national city, she’s nothing especial. kara doesn’t feel like eating anymore and ends up leaving early. 
  • she’s punching one of the walls at the deo repeatedly, each punch harsher than the last. her knuckles feel on fire but it’s working wonders to get her mind off lena and her new best friend molly whom today decided to invite her to the beach. “what is wrong with her?” winn whispers to alex almost scared of kara’s sudden display of anger, alex shrugs and tell him she has no idea since kara refuses to talk with anyone about it. “she’s jealous,” j’onn says without looking up from the file he’s holding and both of them open their mouths in surprise. “psychic, remember?” 
  • “have i done something to upset you?” lena asks with her cheeks red in embarrassement and her voice breaking, “you’ve been avoiding me for weeks, yesterday you cancelled our lunch date because you said you had a lot of stuff to do but then you uploaded a picture on instagram with james in your pajamas eating popcorn. look kara, i know we all need our space sometimes but i’d rather hear the truth than finding out via social media that you’re lying to me.” she sounds so hurt and she’s almost on the verge of tears, kara feels awful she didn’t mean to make her feel bad, she was just tired of hearing her talk about molly and how amazing she was every single time they got together. “you want the truth?” lena nods eagerly and kara tries, she does, to keep her composure when she catches the necklace lena’s wearing… gold with rose pendant. “that is pretty,” she points to it and lena grabs it between her hands, “thank you! molly gave it to me yesterday.” kara feels her fist tighten. 
  • “well the truth is that molly is annoying,” she says standing up from her place and lena’s eyes widen. “yes, she’s annoying and she’s keeping you all to herself. it’s almost as she’s holding you captive! she’s taking you to the beach and to that art gallery i was going to take you, you are eating potstickers with her, lena, that’s our thing!” there’s no going back now… “and she’s… she’ probably ugly too—oh she has a motorcycle, how original! you know what lena, i can fly! i could fly you from here to paris in less than an hour, i bet molly can’t do that. you know what else i can do? lift you up, with one finger probably, can molly lift you up? no i don’t think she can. does she let you win at mario kart?! she doesn’t, huh, does she even know how to play mario kart, does she?!” 
  • lena looks at her in disbelief before she bursts out laughing and kara lets out a groan, “it’s not funny lena! i am much more interesting that molly will ever be and i’m—mphm!” lena’s kissing her, her cold hands are tangling themselves in her hair and she’s pulling her impossibly close and kara feels like she’s floating. for the first three seconds she doesn’t respond, but as soon as lena slips a warm tongue into her mouth her body reacts and she’s grabbing her everywhere. her face, her neck, her waist, her ass, lena gasps and they break apart. “sorry, i didn’t mean to… i just wanted to… you see this wasn’t what i had planned,” kara looks to the ground but it’s not for long because lena is grabbing her chin, making her look into her eyes and she melts. 
  • “love… i can’t believe you were jealous of molly.” kara clicks her tongue almost offended, she was not jealous of molly, she’s about to say it, to assure lena she doesn’t feel such childish emotion when lena gives her a small peck on the lips and her train of thought is stopped. “she’s married… and has two kids!” kara wants to hide under lena’s desk for the rest of the evening.
I want a Marauders series.

I want an 11 year old Sirius Black finally entering Platform 9 ¾, finally escaping from his unloving family, with a look of hope and fear of what’s next to come in his eyes. I want a misunderstood Remus Lupin entering the train, scared of what might happen if anyone finds out his secret, scared he might not fit in just like at home. I want a little Peter Pettigrew, awkwardly walking through the station, anxious about making friends and starting this whole new chapter of his life. I want a fearless James Potter, excited for the new adventures ahead, ambitious and eager to find his new group of friends waiting for him on that train. I want the four of them finding no open compartments on the train and agreeing to sit with each other for the ride, unaware of the brotherhood that was just born. 


I want Remus coming back after his first full moon at school, new scars etched in his skin, scared to face anyone’s questions. I want Sirius telling Remus that whoever did that to him wont see the light of day, and Remus breaking down, ashamed to tell his new friends what a monster he is. I want Sirius, James and Peter all reminding Remus every single day that he is far from a monster, and that they love him for who he is. I want Sirius illegally learning how to turn into his animagus forms so that he can stay with Remus during his transformations and make sure he makes it out okay. I want the three boys skipping classes to stay with Remus after a rough full moon, snuggled up in front of the fire with chocolate frogs and pumpkin juice. I want McGonagall to find the four boys asleep in their common room, but let them off with a pass because she could see Remus’s new scars and the loving arms of the other boys protectively around him (and because she’s had a sweet spot for those boys from the day she met them).

I want James desperately trying to win over miss Lily Evens, the girl with a heart far more fiery than her bright red hair. I want Lily constantly shutting him down, keeping her admiration for him to herself. I want Peter trying to befriend her in hopes that he could introduce her into the group, then feeling bad and eventually just telling her how much James talks about her and how she should give him a chance. I want Sirius teasing the HELL out of James when he comes back from his first date with a lipstick stain on his cheek (which Lily left on purpose, fully aware of the torture that would come).I want James spoiling the crap out of his best friends, especially Sirius. I want 5 hour Quidditch practices, James wanting nothing more than to just go to his room and sleep, but alas, Sirius is waiting for him with another one of his “great” ideas that he’s been working on. I want the three boys being as obnoxious as humanly possible at all of James’s Quidditch games, and James secretly loving it. 

I want Sirius shamelessly flirting with all the first years, and Remus looking at him with jealous eyes. I want Sirius pulling Remus aside at random points during the day (especially when he can see that look in his eyes) and reminding him that he’ll always be his number one Moony. I want Sirius randomly coming up with nicknames for his friends, names that only they could have the honor of using. I want him turning into a dog to avoid responsibility (and to mess with Snap on occasion). I want Sirius to get furious when James would decide to hang out with Lily instead of him, but grow to love her like a sister. I want other Gryffindors to lose their shit because “Black, shut tHE HELL UP ITS 4 IN THE MORNING”. I want a loyal Sirius always standing up for his friends, even if he knows their wrong. I want McGonagall accidentally calling Sirius “Mr. Potter” because of his closeness with the Potter family, and refusing to take it back once she sees the look of pure joy in his eyes, because for once in his life, Sirius Black has a family who loves him. 

I want Peter stealing chocolate from the Great Hall after dinner to sneak up to Remus on a full moon. I want him being too awkward to talk to the Ravenclaw he has a crush on and needing Sirius to be his wingman. I want him defying all odds and doing whatever it takes to help his friends, including stealing some wolfs bane for Remus from Herbology class. I want Peter getting picked on by the older students, and then James and Sirius have a “talk” with them and comforting their little Wormtail. I want sleepless nights, wondering into the kitchen and snacking on pastries until morning. I want Peter the Peacemaker, always there to be the unbiased opinion in any argument the other three got into. I want Peter, little scared Peter, to finally find a place where he isn’t just “scared little Peter”. I want Peter finding his place along side his best friends (brothers, rather) and learning how to open up, and be as courageous as his heart, because he knows that even if he falls, he’ll have three amazing people waiting to catch him. 


I want birthday parties. I want James going above and beyond, decorating the whole Gryffindor Tower, getting tons of gifts, making the cakes, the whole 10 yards. I want Sirius crying during his first birthday at Hogwarts because he’s never had anyone make such a fuss over him (and he’ll never let James stop making such a fuss over him). I want Peter eating the cake before the party even began, and James trying so hard to be mad but failing because Peter is basically his little brother. I want James almost forgetting about his own birthday until he walks into the common room where Remus, Sirius and Peter are all standing with stupid grins, surrounded by balloons and colorful potions (and of course Lily, much to James’ surprise). I want Sirius beating the crap out of anyone who dares comment on Remus’ scars, and James beating the living day light out of anyone who comments on Sirius’ home life. I want Peter being there to comfort Remus and Sirius while this is all happening, assuring Remus that he is no monster, and telling Sirius he is nothing like his family. I want all four boys staying up night after night creating the Marauders Map, the map that they sign their honorary nicknames to, and swear will make them legends one day. I want them coming up with the most epic pranks, even going as far as to prank the teachers (except Minny, of course). I want detention after detention, sitting in classrooms or polishing trophies or doing dirty work for different professors, each of the four boys looking at each other with mischievous smiles. I want James showing the boys some new potions his dad created, or his new invisibility cloak that they can use for their epic pranks.

I want all four of these boys meeting on the train every year, in the same compartment, planning the year ahead of them, escaping from reality. I want James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin, all finding hope and belonging and worth within each other. I want Prongs, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Moony. I want to hear their story. 


inspiration: @alessiajontrunfio, @siriuslestrange, @euphemiapottcr, @jilylicious, @azkaabanter, @hpconversations, @marauderconvos, @marauders-guide-to-hogwarts i love all of your accounts, your posts gave me some inspiration for this lil thingy i did :)

“What’s it like?” Bittle asked one evening as they settled on Jack’s couch with their nightcaps: red wine for Bittle, chamomile tea for Jack. “Being bi?”

Jack chuckled. “That’s a complicated questions, Bits.”

“Oh, c’mon,” Bittle said, taking a small sip of the petite syrah Jack’s parents had sent them after Jack announced their relationship. “You’ve heard all my bellyachin’ about growing up gay in Georgia-” He was cut off momentarily by the beginnings of Jack’s protests, but waved him off. “Fine, my completely legitimate struggles. Better?”

Jack grinned and nodded. Bittle rolled his eyes fondly.

“But you rarely talk about your experiences. When did you know you weren’t straight? How did you realize you liked girls and boys? Was it harder or easier or just different being bi in Juniors?”

“You’ve thought about this a lot,” Jack said mildly, blowing at the steam rising from his mug.

“Of course I have,” Bittle said with an exasperated look. “I think about you a lot.”

Keep reading

Shelter - Remus Lupin x Reader (contains smut)

Request: would you ever do a PoA Professor Lupin and student y/n smut imagine?? If you can’t, then that’s okay! I absolutely love your work and if you’re not comfortable with writing it, then that’s absolutely fine ✨

Warnings:  This is a PROFESSOR Remus imagine that contains smut. It’s perfectly legal since the reader is 18. However, if you do not like the idea or feel comfortable with it, please don’t read this. Just scroll past it. (I have to tell you though, that there is nothing wrong with relationships with an age difference-personal experience.) .Other than that, my English and the smut part, which is not the most graphic smut I have written. (under the cut)
Image and gifs aren’t mine/ Credits to their original owners. 
Word count: 6k+
MASTERLIST

You knew you were in for a hell of a year since the moment you laid eyes on him. You didn’t know why or what but you knew… your last year would be a year to remember.
You had missed the Sorting Ceremony, again. So, you went to your dorm and settled things down while you waited for everyone to fall asleep. You would then sneak to the kitchens and grab something to eat. Naturally, you were in for a surprise, but of course, you had no idea.
After a while, it was late enough for you to go unnoticed. You had quickly found the pear and tickled it, transforming it into a door- knob. You smiled to yourself. You had found your way around the castle without that ridiculous map that the twins had stolen from Filch’s office. You knew every single secret passageway and every single corridor-you knew Hogwarts. You were friends with them, with all of the Weasleys. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that you had briefly dated Charlie. Even though you had realized that you were better off as friends after a while. You had bonded with the twins over Quidditch and pranks. You had tried to make them study-it had ended badly; your hair had gone pink, the color you hated the most, for a week.
You crept inside the kitchens, and almost immediately were greeted by the kind house elves.
“Hello, Miss! Welcome back!! What can Bloom get you, miss?” one of them asked you.
“What have I told you, guys? It’s just Y/N” you smiled warmly at them. They just shrugged it off and started preparing only Merlin knows what. At some point, you were worried about the amount of food they were piling up, so you just stopped them, reaching for the chocolate bar that was right before you.
“Um, guys… Chill. I think I’ll just grab some chocolate and-” but before you could finish off with your sentence you heard a low cough like someone wanted to make their presence known, coming from behind you back. Oh, no. You slowly turned around, ready to face the music-and probably Snape and detention- only to find a very, very, disturbingly young man, looking at you, rather amused.
He had a beautiful face no matter his scars, that under the dim candle light illuminating the room, seemed to be soft and strangely attractive. He must have been in his early thirties, you thought. Oh, shit. He has to be your new DADA professor. He was your teacher? Great.
“Hello” you said sheepishly and lowered your gaze, but not for long. You found yourself way too captivated by his kind eyes to look away. You saw him fighting a chuckle.
“It’s past curfew, miss…” he trailed off, not really reprimanding you. You smiled and all your confidence had rushed back in.  You were never the coward one.
“Y/L/N. Oh, I know” you said, raising an eyebrow in emphasis. You liked challenging people. Not too much but just enough. Which seemed to be the case here as well. He was slightly surprised at your answer. He thought that you would apologize and rush out of the kitchen. But there you were, sitting on the table, opening the wrapped chocolate bar, answering back completely nonchalant. He stayed silent for a couple of seconds while you hadn’t even dreamt of breaking the eye contact you held with him. His eyes.
“You do realize I could give you detention, Miss Y/L/N, right?” he asked you. You could tell that he intended to be strict but it didn’t exactly work. Instead, his tone sounded playful and a bit… provocative. You jumped off the table, walking over to him-it wasn’t your fault he was standing near the door.
“But you won’t” you said steadily while piercing his eyes with your intense gaze. He was taken aback by your boldness. You chuckled lightly.
“Goodnight… professor” you bid him goodbye, sending him a wink before you walked out.
Oh, boy. What just happened?



You knew it was going to be bad. The moment you walked into his class, you just knew it.
He had insisted on focusing on the practical experience of facing a boggart. You knew very well that you weren’t capable of facing your worst feat. It was simple, really. You didn’t fear something that could take shape. You feared your own mind. Your life was a lonesome experience and you could understand that very fact more than anyone. You carried the weight of humanity itself with you everywhere you went. You could say that you were trouble. You never really fitted in- your mind was so unending, you knew no limitations. Dumbledore had said that those were signs of geniuses. You thought that those were the signs of madness. Nobody quite understood what made you different, you didn’t even understand it yourself- but you felt it. You felt deep in your bones. You were the lone, last star of each ending night, that was still shining brightly as the sun began to rise.
You knew you were no good. Maybe, professors saw an excellent student; maybe, your friends saw an amazing prankster; maybe your ex had seen a great lover. But none of those things were true. Not entirely, at least. And that feeling, being numb, that was your worst fear. It paralyzed you.
That was why, when that boggart never took shape, you were instantly unable to move. Nobody really knew what was going on. Your classmates thought you feared nothing and the boggart couldn’t morph, but he knew the truth. Before he could help you, you had helped yourself. You weren’t looking for a knight-you were looking for a sword. You remembered every single moment that you felt like you had a family of your own. The twins making you burst into laughter in the middle of the Great Hall with their crazy pranks, Cedric making you feel welcomed and appreciated with his kind personality, Oliver counting on you to win the game. You were not alone, and you gave a silent promise to yourself to never feel numb. Even if the pain became too much to handle. Even if there wasn’t a single hope left. Even if the end was near. You would never shut yourself. Because, feeling, even the pain, was what made us humans. Because feeling and feeling too much was better than forgetting what it was like to have emotions. Feelings made something real. And you wouldn’t change that for the world.
You hadn’t turned your boggart into something funny. You had simply placed it back inside the trunk that it had been. You looked at him, searching for something you didn’t even know what it was. His soft, rich caramel eyes were already on you. He seemed… confused. You stepped back, letting the next person in line perform the spell. You slipped out of the class and you knew that he had noticed, but you simply couldn’t stay there. However, you knew that he knew, so you had to face him at some point. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do that. You couldn’t face those big, soft, caramel eyes. Oh, Merlin. I am melodramatic. 



For the next month, you had avoided his classes. You would come up with excuses, silly ones to stay away from him. You knew it wasn’t… shit, what were you supposed to do? Because the truth was… you had developed a crush on your professor. You couldn’t help it. He was kind and caring and sweet and gentle, he had helped Harry with his boggart… and you knew what he was hiding. You had guessed it the very first time you saw him. The secret behind his scars. Scars that to everybody else would seem… weird, or even ugly. But to you… to you, they were perfect. You wanted to trace your hands along his scars, you wanted to kiss every single one of them. And you had to contain yourself, or you would sigh in front of everyone.
“Hello?”. You snapped your head towards… Fred and George.
“What?” you asked as in a haze. You couldn’t possibly focus on anything else but him. You were having breakfast- well, coffee to be exact- and you could feel his eyes burning holes on your back. You knew it was him and you felt guilty. He hadn’t even mentioned that you were skipping classes to Dumbledore.
“Lupin told us to tell you to get your ass to his office after class” the said in unison. You raised an eyebrow in question.
“He told you to get my ass to his office?” you asked sarcastically, but you were too worried and stressed out to actually care.
“Well, not per say. But that was the meaning. What did you do?” Fred said at once. You, however, didn’t want to answer. Because you knew what had led him to call you to his office. Your mind though, oh… that dirty little mind of yours. You were imagining all kind of inappropriate things you would do to him if you ever had the chance. And then it hit you.
You would have to attend his class today in order to see him after. That little shit. Suddenly, you weren’t feeling all that guilty.
“Nothing that concerns you two” you answered calmly. They just smirked. Sometimes, you could swear, they were able to read your mind. You blushed and kept your head lowered.
Great.
The day had passed in a blur. You didn’t really pay attention to any of your classes until… his.
You were about to sit down as far away as possible when you realized that the were no desks or seats. Your eyes met his. For the first time in a month, you felt your heart squeezing in a strange way. His eyes were intense and a bit greener and a little less caramel that what you remembered. And captivating. Always so captivating.
Before you could continue your daydream, more students walked in and he removed his gaze from yours.
“Does anyone know what a Patronus is?” he asked the class after a while. His voice was soft and melodic, rich and kind. You had it bad.
“A Patronus is primarily used to repel Dementors. They can also be used for communication by accomplished witches and wizards, sir” a girl said, ogling him, causing you the urge to throw up.
“Very well. What else can you tell us?” he continued and you felt like you could melt. It was his voice, so it was his fault.
“The Patronus is Guardian which acts as a shield between you and the Dementor like a projection of the very things that the Dementor feeds upon such hope, happiness, the desire to survive. However, since the Patronus is an incantation the Dementors can’t hurt it. The Patronus has two forms, non-corporeal and corporeal. A non-corporeal Patronus can appear as ‘a thin wisp of silver’ that hovers ‘like mist.’ Whereas a corporeal Patronus has a form that is clearly defined and is more than vapor or smoke. The ability to cast a corporeal or non-corporeal Patronus is down to the skill of the witch or wizard. Each Patronus is unique to the witch or wizard who conjures it, and it’s possible, in some cases, for a Patronus to change” you said looking him directly in the eyes. You simply had to answer, otherwise that… girl would receive his attention. Oh, no. No. No. You couldn’t be… were you jealous? Great. Amazing. You had a crush on your professor and you were jealous of everyone who caught his eye. Very… nice.
He was clearly taken aback; he didn’t believe you would participate since you had been avoiding his classes for a month now.
“Precisely miss Y/L/N” he praised you and you blushed. Where was your confidence? He went on about the charm, how to pronounce it and details about the way to cast it, but you already knew that. You may haven’t been able to produce a corporeal Patronus yet but you had been practicing since a very young age.
“Miss Y/L/N. Why don’t you demonstrate for us?” he simply asked you in a way you could have never said no. He gestured the front of the class. Another amazing moment of your amazing day.
You walked over there confidently, suddenly feeling like yourself again.
You focused on your memories. Not one, as he had said, but many happy ones. Your first time on a broom, your first Quidditch game, your Hogwarts letter, your friends and the pranks you had pulled, the people you cared about. Before you could control it, his face appeared only to disappear seconds later. You didn’t have to say the incantation out loud. With a flicker of your wand, a silvery form emerged. Was that a… Thestral?
The creature walked towards you and bow down its head for you to pet it. You placed your-shaking- hand on its fragile head. It was so surreal. You knew you were one of few people who could see those magnificent animals. They are only visible to people who have seen someone dying and fully accepted, understood and internalized the concept. The animal slowly raised its head and its eyes met his, lowering lightly its head in an indication of respect and then it disappeared. You didn’t move for a few seconds after that. You could hear that the other students were performing the spell as well. Some of them, summoning a corporeal Patronus, some of them not. You were a bit lost for a while after that, so, naturally, you jumped slightly when you felt a hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently. You focused your vision on his face, but you were too confused to remember your little crush.
“Are you alright?” he asked you politely but concerned. You hadn’t realized that no one else was in the classroom. You nodded, forcing a smile, but it was too weak to last more than a couple seconds.
With his hand on your back, he prompted you to his desk and made you sit down.
“Why a Thestral?” you questioned, not really asking him; you asked yourself. He eyed you cautiously.
“A Patronus is a representation of who you are and is manifested by a creature that represents you in some way. I have to ask you… have you witnessed a death?” he quietly asked you. They all did, eventually.
“Three. My parents and my brother were killed-no, murdered by Voldemort himself. Such an honor” you answered softly, trying to prevent the memories from drowning you, therefore the use of sarcasm. He seemed to grow quieter. You didn’t want pity.
“I think it is safe to say that those with this Patronus often have the gentlest souls of all, an exceptional wizard or witch who has emerged strong from a dark past” he said in a small voice, making eye contact with you, or trying to, since you wouldn’t look anywhere near him.
“I do have to ask you one more thing. Why did you avoid my class the previous month?” he continued once he realized that you weren’t going to look at him. What could you possibly tell him?
“First the boggart, now my Patronus. What is it with your class that makes my life so difficult?” you playfully asked. It was your coping mechanism. You dared to look at him, a small smile playing on his lips-oh, his lips… and that small scar on his upper lip… 


It was your birthday, it was Saturday and it was freezing. You had the day to yourself since your friends had visited Hogsmeade. You had decided to stay and stroll around the almost empty castle. It was snowing and everything was covered in white. It was serene. You had purposely missed the breakfast so you could sneak something from the kitchens- some chocolate and tea would be nice. This time you greeted the house elves but since they didn’t have something to do, you wouldn’t keep them there, forcing them to make you something. You were a big girl. You could do it yourself.  

You were boiling the water needed for the tea when a small cough made you jump and spill it on you. Many profanities left your mouth that moment.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. Oh, Merlin, you must have burnt yourself” a guilty voice said, making you snap your head towards it. You were face to face with him. He seemed tired, exhausted really. And then you remembered… the full moon was two days ago. His eyes were more caramel that green, this time. You quickly muttered a drying spell along with a healing one and smiled comfortingly.
“No need to. I’m perfectly alright” you said extremely nonchalant. You returned to the counter and started preparing tea again.
“What brings you here, Professor?” you inquired amused. He let out a heavy breath and came next to you, placing his back against the edge of the wooden counter. Well, it wasn’t his back, but his hips… but that, you chose to ignore.
You had talked and chatted few times after class, before class, in between classes. For nothing and everything. Sometimes he would do the talking, sometimes he would listen. Sometimes he would let something small of his past slip. You could tell that he didn’t mean to, but he didn’t really regret it either. Sometimes your conversations would be about the weather; sometimes about the very meaning of existence. A week ago, he had found himself wanting to tell you about his secret. You had seen it in his eyes. That was the thing about you. People were opening up to you, easily. It had something to do with the fact that you never judged anyone, that you accepted almost everything, that you wouldn’t be afraid to fight and stand up for your loved ones. He had discovered that you may were just eighteen, but you weren’t just eighteen. And even though you didn’t know this, he had found himself waiting with anticipation your next talk.
He hadn’t answered when you handed him a cup of tea. It was your favorite and quite coincidentally his as well. He smiled at you, but he was tired and you felt bad for him. You reached for the top self-even though you weren’t that tall, you managed to get it. Two of the most amazing chocolate bars ever created. You smiled brightly, handing him one. He looked puzzled but entertained.
“When someone gives you chocolate, you don’t ask questions. You just take it” you said in a playfully serious tone, taking a sip of your tea. It was hot and exactly what you needed.
“Thank you, Y/N” he told you, rather moved by your small action. You just shrugged it off.
“So what brings you here?” he asked you, moments later, a smirk plastered on his face, lighting up the whole country.
“Hey!” you retorted. It wasn’t fair, using your question. He raised his eyebrows in amusement. You rolled your eyes, dramatically.
“Fine. I wanted to have my special day spent with chocolate” you informed him, but he furrowed his eyebrows. You sighed heavily to add to the drama.
“It’s my birthday” you said with a fake exasperation. His eyes twinkled with something that if you didn’t know any better you would identify as…hope? Mixed with something else. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but it was there. He placed down his cup and chocolate onto the table next to him.
“Happy Birthday!” he wished you, excitedly. Before you could answer, he had enveloped you into a hug. You were thrown off. Like, completely off. After a few seconds, though, you shyly hugged him back, whispering a ‘thank you’ before breaking apart. He seemed shocked and happy and more shocked. Like he didn’t expect himself to be that bold. Or you to return the gesture. He had even blushed-something that made you realize that your crush was long gone and it had been replaced by something deeper. A connection you couldn’t understand in all its glory because you had never felt like that before.
“Thank you, Professor” you said again but it didn’t feel right, calling him professor.
“Call me Remus outside the class” he said so naturally that, again, he was taken aback by his own words and boldness. You chuckled lightly.
“Remus” you said tentatively. He instantly smiled and your whole world seemed brighter.


You were proud of yourself. You hadn’t missed a single class and your grades were better than ever. You enjoyed school this year, but for entirely different reasons. It was something about him that made you feel… good, after a long time. You were very well aware of everything that would appear to be ‘problematic’. But you were also aware of your feelings. You felt l so naked when you were with him. He could strip you of your walls, of your guarded defenses, leaving you completely and utterly vulnerable. He had shattered any mental boundaries you had ever possessed. He left you breathless with his aura and creative, rhythmic way of speaking to everyone. You were losing your mind and falling into madness and it felt okay, almost a necessity. He showed you how to embrace the lack of time that humans all have, that death was the inevitable and that was not as important as people around you made it seem. You were out of your mind and that was such a wonderful thing.
Your conversations were longer and more meaningful; you had found yourself in the Astronomy Tower the other night, talking to him about your love for the night sky and how you preferred the stars over the moon. Especially the full moon-you had seen him tensed up a bit and you had ‘accidentally’ let a hint slip through your lips. You had gone silent after that until you decided to tell him. You asked him when he would trust you enough, if ever. He had looked bewildered and slightly worried. You had smiled his anxiousness away, letting him know that you knew, and it was perfectly alright because it was still him, even if he didn’t think that. That you couldn’t care less. You didn’t know this, but in that moment, he had to admit to himself something that he kept pushing away all this time. He was captivated by your very essence. And it didn’t matter that you were a student-he never saw you as anything less than an equal; sometimes he saw someone greater in you- greater than anyone who had met before. Someone who held the wisdom of the world inside their soul. You had told him that you had always felt older than your age and that even Dumbledore had said that sometimes you were older than him. He had laughed and that sound was honey to your ears.
Ever since that night, you were closer to each other, stealing glances and sending small smiles even across the class. You could sense that he was low-key, proud of you when you declined every single boy that had come up and asked you out on a date. You didn’t want to get your hopes up, but you felt it.
Due to your past of falsehoods, you had developed this theory that all men are no good, worthless. He had shown you that men could be loyal, passionate, tender, and caring creatures. The boys you have dealt with were the complete opposite. He had made you see that there was a huge difference between the boys you had dated and the man you craved. You had finally met someone who meant more than a lot to you. And not just the ‘he makes me feel special’ but that person that you would fight harder for than you would for yourself. That person that made you want to be better, that showed you your true essence that you didn’t know existed until they came along. You had discovered things about yourself just from being with him. It started as a crush; after a while, you found yourself in love; and now… you could feel something more. Something selfless. It was the little things he would do that made you smile and cry at the same time. You knew that he felt it too-maybe not in the romantic way you did, but still. There was a connection that no one could deny.
It was a cold February night but your heart was warmer than ever. In fact, it was so warm you couldn’t handle it. You couldn’t really take it anymore. You had found your way to his chambers. You didn’t really know how you were to say this. You couldn’t exactly walk in and go all ‘Hello, I’m in love with you. Okay, bye’. But once he opened the door, even that felt like a good idea. He was ravishing in the dim light. He smiled and it seemed that the sun had lost its glory. His eyes captured yours and you felt like you could melt under his gaze. You loved him. Merlin, you did. How could you be so stupid, thinking that it was just a crush? When you didn’t respond, he furrowed his eyebrows, asking you if you were alright, stepping aside so you could walk in.
The moment that door closed, every single restraint you had… was gone. Every single defensive mechanism… gone.
“I need to tell you something. I am in love with you. I have been for a while now. And I know that I am not supposed to feel that way. But I do and I can’t shake you off of my mind. You’re constantly there, reminding of everything I want and cannot have. Your mind is a masterpiece and your soul is ethereal. Extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world. Effortlessly, you shine brighter than the sun itself and when you smile, every pair of knees weaken, bowing down to the ingenious design you are. You are the kind of art that captures the blinding light that keeps me from opening my eyes, but how I foolishly don’t mind and long to go blind by such greatness. Your imperfections are my delight” you finally told him. You had let go of everything that was holding you back. You knew what he would tell you and you knew that he would try to make it hurt as less as possible, but he would start avoiding you. And even the thought hurt but you couldn’t cope with it any longer. When you finally looked at him, he was pale and visibly shaken.
“I think you should go” he said in a small voice. He didn’t sound mad or angry or strict. You nodded. You had clearly overstepped your boundaries. You reached for the knob, but before you opened the door, you whispered a question that would torture his mind for a while.
“Is it because of the ‘difficulties’ or because you don’t like me like that? I don’t need an answer. But you do”. With that, and a stolen glance you left his room, closing the door behind you.
You let out a long breath. At least, you were honest with him and most importantly, with yourself. He was your teacher after all and almost twice your age. You could see the ‘problems’ as other people would call them. You weren’t stupid. You were, however, completely, unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him. But that didn’t mean that he was. 


You were merely right. You hadn’t talked or chatted or looked each other ever since that night.  He wasn’t avoiding you per say, but he wasn’t thrilled spending time with you, either. And that’s why you never pressured things. You had done your part. And he had done his. It hurt because you were pretending you didn’t feel that way anymore, but in all honesty, you were falling even harder every time you saw him, thought about him… him. You had felt the urge to bang your head against a wall or something in order to stop thinking scenarios that would never be true.
Months had gone by. April was almost gone. You felt that you needed a change. That was the main reason that you agreed on a ‘friendly’ date. He was good looking, smart and funny. He was a really nice boy. But that was all he was. A boy. Nonetheless, you had decided to dress up a bit. It was spring and the sun was spreading its warmth all over the place, so after a lot of thinking you found yourself in a beautiful yet casual lilac dress, with your hair in loose curls and a touch of makeup. You looked good, you thought a tad surprised. You were about to turn when you bumped into someone. You would have apologized quicker if it wasn’t for your lack of focus.
“I-I’m sorry, professor” you whispered. You saw him grimacing at your last word but then his expression turned into one of admiration. You knew you had blushed, feeling his eyes roaming your body like a second skin. You locked eyes with him. You could see the desire in them. Act on it, you stubborn git, you thought to yourself. He opened and closed his mouth too many times. You just shook your head and left. Or tried to. His hand was wrapped around your wrist, gently, almost scared by the very action. You halted and faced him. You were done playing games. You have had enough. And he did too, apparently.
“I’ve tried distancing myself, making up excuses, intentionally finding reasons to avoid you but none of it ever worked” he admitted shyly but… finally. Your eyes widened a bit, your breath was caught on the back of your throat. Did he really just say that?
“Never have I felt something more compelling than this bond we share. But I’m your teacher and twice your age and that’s not even the worst part. I can’t escape these feelings but I don’t know what to do, Y/N” he continued. He seemed almost vulnerable. Feeling like you would explode, you slowly brought your hands to his face, cupping his cheek, electrified by the touch. He pierced your eyes with his and boy, you were a goner. Not being able to handle it any longer, you crashed your lips to his. It didn’t set off fireworks, it set off an atomic bomb. His lips were soft and warm yet hungry. He kissed you deeply and pulled you closer, his hands wrapped around your waist, holding you in place. You kissed him back with the equal amount of lust and hunger and emotion. You softly bit his lower lip, tracing your tongue across it. But he pulled away, leaving you… empty.
“We shouldn’t. This is wrong” he murmured trying to convince himself more than anything else. You grabbed his hand and without letting him complain, dragged him-quite literally- to his room. Thankfully it was just around the corner. 

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I Broke Down Tonight

So tonight something very strange happened. Something that has never happened to me before. I had a panic attack. My day was going normally and I was at work. 10 minutes before my shift, I started to feel a little bit weird. I was uncomfortable. I felt disconnected from the world around me. My hands started shaking and I started shivering and twitching. I clocked out at work and quickly went downstairs and just sat there, thinking about a ton of things all at once. Next thing I knew, I was outside on the sidewalk with two of my co workers beside me trying to calm me down. I was curled up in a ball, breathing heavily with tears running down my face. At first, I couldn’t pin point why this was happening. But then it hit me. Lately, I had been thinking a lot about some people from the start of my channel. People that used to support every video I did and would always interact with me. Flashes of these people flew into my memory. These people were people who I talked to on a regular basis and people I was getting to know fairly well. One of them in particular (who will go nameless) messaged me first because of my videos. She had said that she was very very depressed and cut herself on a regular basis, And at one point had contemplated suicide. At the time, I was making videos on a very regular basis. She said that my videos brought her so much joy and put a smile on her face. My videos were the reason that she had stopped cutting. Months went by and my videos got more and more infrequent. And then I never heard from that girl again. Then, a few months after, I found out that the amazing, strong, and wonderful girl who had sent me those messages months before, had ended her own life. This hit me harder than ever tonight. After conjuring up this memory of her in my mind, I just couldn’t pull myself together. I was crying as my dad held me in his arms asking me what was wrong. And for the first time, I was completely honest with him. I told him that I don’t want to go to college. I told him how much I absolutely adore YouTube, and I told him how incredibly terrified I am of not reaching my dreams as a yputuber. At first, he didn’t understand. He thought my dream was to get famous and be able to make a lot of money. But then I explained my real dream to him. My dream as a YouTuber is to make as many people as I can happy. I want to be there for you all every single day and bring a smile to your faces. I want to make you laugh when you feel like crying. I want to make you smile when you feel like breaking down. I want to make you happy even when you are at your lowest. The thought of that amazing girl ending her own life crushed me. I almost felt responsible for her death. I wish that I had done more. I wish that I had talked to her more. I wish that I could have made more videos for when she felt down. I don’t just want to entertain people. I want to give them hope. I want to make people smile and I want to show people that they truly matter. I don’t do YouTube because I want to get famous. I do YouTube because I want to make people’s lives better. I do it because I want to inspire people and make them feel happy on their saddest days. I do YouTube because I don’t want anyone to feel alone. I want to be there for you guys. I want to be the person you can look to when you are at your lowest and I want to help you in your time of need. I cannot even begin to examine how absolutely in love with YouTube I am. I love it more than anything. I can’t live without it and for this next year, I am going to try as hard as I can to make my dreams come true and I will not stop until it does. You all mean the world to me. I wouldn’t be the happy person I am today without you. Thank you all so much for all of your amazing support. Your comments and tweets and edits and fanarts and everything you do makes me so happy. I love you guys so much. Thank you. Let’s make this year amazing and let’s grow this community into something incredible. A community where everyone respects each other and helps each other out. A community where everyone is close and friendly. A community where no one will ever feel alone. I know we can do this. I love you all so much.

You Will Never Not Matter

all for love || stiles stilinski

word count: 4174

warnings: none

prompt: collab with @sarcasticallystilinski

author’s note: happy lacrosse week everyone! this is my first part of lacrosse week with hay! we are very proud of this one and we hope you have as much fun reading as we did writing!

masterlist

coming soon

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Until My Last Moment

Summary: Thanks to Bucky, during a game of truth or dare the reader is put into a compromising position..which may or may not lead to more fun positions with a certain super soldier later on. 

Word Count:  6028

Author’s note: Guys…SMUTT SO MUCH SMUTT! The reader also has a past with Wade Wilson..so this is kinda a dead pool imagine too? ( but not in the way you guys will think;)~ the reader also has powers!!)

Sam laughed, “ And that was how I lost my virginity..but if that story leaves this room y’all are cold”. The entire room laughed along with him, even though there was only five other people in it.

You all had been bored in between missions and decided to play a game of truth or dare. When alcohol was thrown into the equation, things got dirty real fast. Steve laughed, “ God after hearing that story I don’t think being a virgin is too bad”.

Bucky and Natasha threw you knowing glances, but the blush on your cheeks made things pretty obvious anyways. How could you not have a crush on the most well liked man in all of America?

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She's Not You | TOM HOLLAND X READER

Description: In which the reader, in an effort to get over her crush on Tom, decides to set him up but for some reason none of the girls ever get a second date. Tom’s problem is that the one girl he wants to go out with seems to be hell bent on setting him up with someone else.

Author’s Note: I’m back hoes what’s good? I’m pretty proud of how this turned out and I hope you liked reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Inspiration for this fic came from something I read a while ago and last night it popped into my mind for some reason so yea now there’s this. Anyway, let me know what you think!

Word Count: 2219

FANFICTION MASTERLIST



“So?” I prodded Tom, dragging out the o’s as long as possible. We were in his dressing closet after a long day of filming as he took out his regular clothes at a snail’s pace. You’d think since he’s somewhat of an athlete he’s be a quick changer but unfortunately that wasn’t the case.

Tom took out a pair of jeans and threw them on a nearby chair. “So what?” he asked not looking at me.

I threw my head back with a groan, he knew exactly what I was going to ask him. It was the same question I always asked him every time I set him up with a new girl. Each week I’d find a girl who would go on a date with Tom, which wasn’t that much of a challenge, and each week he’d take the girl to dinner.

The only problem was that none of these girls ever got a second date. Not a single one and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.  I like to think I know Tom pretty well so I’m always surprised when the girls I think he’ll really like never get a second date.

“How was your date with Quinn?” I asked, eager to hear what he thought of her. This is the same question I’d ask every week with another girl’s name. I was hoping that Tom would say he liked her and that he would be taking her out again but-

“It was fine,” Tom answered pulling out a t shirt and shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.

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ROAD TRIP AU (made with the help of @nonbinaryevanhansen, @thisiswhatmylifeamountsto, @dr-evn-hnsn, and other bros from the DEH discord chat)

  • The Gang™ decides to have a road trip–one last big hurrah–before they go their separate ways to their respective jobs/graduate programs. 
  • Alana is in charge of planning because she doesn’t mind phone calls, can be trusted to not spend more than they’ve budgeted, and is generally more responsible than the rest. She has a spreadsheet with every aspect of the trip planned–right down to what rest stops they can stop at for people to stretch their legs or use the restroom. She has a color coded binder containing the menus of the restaurants they’re going to eat at, the brochures for the tourist destinations they’re stopping at, and the receipts for all of their reservations; she also has a copy of the itinerary for everyone. Two copies for Jared because…he’s Jared.
  •  Zoe is the deejay. While she’s procrastinating from studying for finals, because Zoe has senioritis even though she’s not even technically in her last year of college yet, she makes dozens of playlists that are specific for every different road trip mood. One is named “For When Connor Starts Being an Asshole and We Need to Drown Him Out” and another is aptly titled “Weird Tree Noises to Calm Evan Down.” She’s the only one allowed to use the aux chord and she has to keep a close eye on it because Jared’s constantly looking for an opportunity to rick roll the caravan.
  • Connor is the driver. Not because he’s a particularly good driver, but because he’s pulled enough all nighters in his day that he doesn’t mind driving through the night as Alana requires for some parts of the trip. Even when he gets sleepy, he just has to put on Zoe’s “Please Don’t Fall Asleep at the Wheel and Kill Us All” mix and he’s good to go for another six hours. When Jared tries to call shotgun, Connor tells him “if I have to sit beside you all day, I’m going to drive us off a bridge.”
  • Evan gets shotgun. He spends most of the time playing eye spy with Connor– “I spy with my little eye something green” “Evan could you please pick something that isn’t a tree for the love of God”–or reading wikipedia articles on the various trees they come across. He doles out the caprisuns and individual bags of doritos and lays potato chips that they stock up on whenever they find a Wal-Mart that’s reasonably close to the interstate. When they make stops, he’s the one wearing the fanny pack with the tiny fan, travel-sized sunscreen, bug spray wipes, and extra bandaids in it.
  • Jared is…well, Jared. He’s relegated to the back seat with Alana and Zoe and he’s bored as hell. Alana spends their car time going over the itinerary and reading guide books and Zoe alternates between staring out the window while listening to music on her phone and playing Candy Crush on her phone. Jared tries to help her out by telling her what to do, but she mostly ignores him, much to his distress. At one point, he swipes her phone because “Zoe you’ve been at it for an hour this is getting embarrassing” and nearly gets mauled by Zoe in her attempts to get her phone back. Alana is the only thing between him and certain death at that point. He also smuggles a lot of contraband snacks on board in his backpack and suitcase and refuses to share despite having more chips and soda than any single person could/should consume. 

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misplaced

Originally posted by chyoft

genre: fluff and second hand embarrassment; high school!au; drabble

pairing: namjoon x reader

length: 2.6k

summary: confessing to the smartest boy in the school shouldn’t be too hard, right? all goes well when you slip your letter of confession into his locker… or at least what you thought was his locker and not your arch enemy’s. since when did 151021 even slightly resemble 151020?

prompts: 
“you may be an idiot, but you’re my idiot.”

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Crazy World - Part One - FBI!Stiles Stilinski

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: FBI!Stiles Stilinski/Reader

Word Count: 12,027

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Oral (female receiving), Orgasm Denial, Mentions of Alcohol, Protected Sex, Unprotected Sex, Shower Sex, Daddy Kink, 

Notes: I’m sorry this came out as late as it did. And I decided to break it into two parts. I will get the second half out as soon as I can. Lemme know what you thinkkkkk.

Part 2

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