every other heartbreaking ships who never talked to one another ever

Wake Up, Dean

Summary: Dean is cursed and Sam thinks reader is the only one who can save him…

Square Filled: First Kiss

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word Count: 1,200ish

Rating: explicit (no smut, just language)

A/N: Written/created for @spnkinkbingo

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

damerey prompt: post tlj - poe and rey are forced to kiss so they don't blow their cover during a mission

Damerey prompt: Leia watching them meeting and later bonding over ships, they make her remember of when she and han where young, because poe makes her remember him but at the same time they are so different

Author’s note: So I cheated a bit and combined prompts. I just couldn’t resist how these two flowed from where part 1 left off. I hope you enjoy the continuation of A Jedi’s Quest!

Summary: Post The Last Jedi. Rey and Poe are on a mission to an ancient Jedi Temple; will Rey find what she seeks?

Also posted: FF.net / AO3

Chapter 2

“I was starting to worry.”

“No need to worry about us, General.”

Leia rolled her eyes and turned to Rey. Pilots. “How did it go?”

Rey reached into her pack and pulled out the cloth. “I found it. Not that I know what to do with it.”

Leia pulled Rey gently aside; it didn’t escape her notice that both Rey and Poe glanced at each other quickly before Poe disappeared around the corner. She chose to keep quiet, knowing all too well how it felt to be needled about feelings you were trying to ignore. Leia smiled wistfully; she missed Han so much. She hoped he was at peace. Luke had never explained that sort of things properly; now she would never know. But she had more important things to worry about. Like an uncertain Jedi.

Keep reading

REQUEST:How You Fell

Originally posted by spaicetrek

Pairing: ReaderxKirk

Rating: Teen?

Characters: Jim Kirk, Reader, Bones, Mentions of Sulu and Uhura

Summary: REQUEST can you do a fanfic of kirk x reader where they work together but haven’t admitted they like each-other and how kirk admits it? Or how they meet?

Warnings: UNEDITED MESS, Bad language,

Tags: @yourtropegirl @fridgebiscuit @mishaissocoollike (I DON’T KNOW WHO WANTED TO BE TAGGED IN WHAT I AM SO SORRY IF I MESSED UP GUYS)

Author’s note: This request is months old, so let’s hope that I did okay. By the way, this is crap in my opinion. But I am trying to get things flowing again.

The day that you met Jim Kirk, one of your best friends and the future Captain of the enterprise, was quite embarrassing. You were both in the same class, him much further than you of course. He started a year after you; but you didn’t know this till after you met. When you met, you were at one of your lowest moments. Your ethics professor and you didn’t see eye to eye, matter of fact you were sure he hated you from the very beginning. That day you had discovered that your masterpiece of a midterm paper had been given a failing grade. This paper you worked for days on, the paper that had been revised by some of the greatest professors the Academy had ever seen, received and F! You were fuming, you were livid, you were ready to murder the man that was currently standing across from you.

Keep reading

At Peace

[A/N: i was going to make this ambiguous, so you could choose the pairings you wanted, but I found I couldn’t do that without making EVERYTHING confusing. So enjoy.

Warning? Kind of Shaladin, but it’s barely touched on, or mentioned. You can also change the names in your head to whatever you want them to be.]

At Peace

Keep reading

Can I just say that H and L’s lyrics fuck me up more than any video or picture proof? This year they have both made it a point to talk about the honesty in their writing. Louis said that the honesty of his lyrics helps fans see a side of him they don’t normally see. Then, Harry with his upcoming album release, has been stressing the fact that these upcoming songs are written about his own life and his experiences. They’ve both expressed and talked about the honesty in their songs, so it really makes you wonder what all these songs are about.
The themes of freedom and forbidden love are so fucking redundant in the songs they’ve written on, it’s hard to be oblivious (but of course antis still manage)
Starting with the most obvious two songs, Home and If I Could Fly:
“So long I’ve been waiting to let go of myself and feel alive. So many nights I thought it over, told myself I kind of liked her, but there was something missing in her eyes.”
One verse in and already hinting at a gay anthem. Louis had a girlfriend before x factor and before Harry. In my head, this verse is talking about when Louis was with her, unsure of himself and scared of what he was feeling, or rather, what he wasn’t feeling. There was a time when he was only just beginning to discover himself, a time of self inflicted hiding. I honestly think this song is about the path of self acceptance after so long of telling/forcing yourself to be something to fit everyone else’s standards. It’s him realizing, hey, maybe I’m not into the gender I was told I’m supposed to like.
It gets more obvious when Louis sings, “I see the smile as it starts to creep in. It was there I saw it in your eyes.” FUck me up with that pronoun change. This song is a literal gay anthem. The fact that Louis sings that part, directly followed by Harry singing, “I was stumbling, looking through the dark, with an empty heart, but you say you feel the same. Could we ever be enough? Baby we could be enough.” This song is such a larrie? I suck at explaining, but just imagine you’ve spent 18 years of your life forcing yourself to be something you’re not, and then you meet this person and everything sort of clicks. This person makes you feel safe, but with all of the outside forces and circumstances, you wonder if its all worth it.
“And it’s alright. Calling out for somebody to hold tonight. When you’re lost, I’ll find a way and I’ll be your light, you will never feel like you’re alone.” The chorus is lead by Harry and finished with Louis singing, “I’ll make this feel like home.” Honestly, the fact that Louis had to leak and promote this song himself says enough.
Harry just had to make it more obvious by writing a response.
“If I could fly, I’d be coming right back home to you. I think I might, give up everything just ask me to.” For someone who has never publicly been in love before (a huge contrast to Louis’ constant het image), he sure does write some heart-wrenching love songs. If his writing style is so terribly honest, where do all of these feelings come from? This song is so vulnerable its hurts to listen to. It’s reassuring and heartbreaking all in one. In the chorus he’s literally saying, if you start to lose yourself and feel like no one is there for you I will give you my love (makes me think of all the stunts and lying Louis has been put through and how he’s starting to forget himself), I am all yours, no one else will ever see how much I love you, you’re my other half, for your eyes only.
Also, real quick, the heart thing, “I can feel your heart inside of mine, I feel it.” Always in my heart?? OKAY MAN.
Then you have Louis’ solo, “I’ve got scars, even though they can’t always be seen, and pain gets hard, but now you’re here and I don’t feel a thing.” Harry is his safety, his sanity, his home. Through all the years of lying, closeting, harsh remarks, and rumors, Louis should have broken down long ago, but Harry has kept him grounded. Thinking of all that Louis has been though makes me tear up, and even when he has seemingly no one, he manages to keep himself standing and strong.
“My hands, your hands, tied up like two ships. Drifting, weightless, waves tries to break it.” Here we go again with the forbidden love, standing together, and holding on. This theme is so constant in their lyrics, it’s almost laughable. The nautical references (Tattoos anyone?) and symbolism stands out clear and loud. Strong is literally just another gay anthem. My mom’s GSA at her school (she’s a teacher) are using this song on their Day of Silence playlist BECAUSE IT’S SO OBVIOUSLY GAY.
The chorus just hits it all the way home, “I’m sorry if I say I need you, but I don’t care, I’m not scared of love. ‘Cause when I’m not with you I’m weaker. Is that so wrong? Is it so wrong? That you make me strong.” The amount of pride in this chorus make me so happy. I can just imagine Louis thinking, “Screw management, screw pr stunts, screw the media, screw homophobia, I love you and I’m not ashamed to say it.” Black and white, clear as day, Louis is deadass saying that he is not ashamed of himself and no amount of forced closeting or homophobic remarks will change that.
“So baby hold on to my heart, oh need you to keep me from falling apart. I’ll always hold on, ‘cause you make me strong.” AND THERE IT IS, hold the fuck on bitch (if it all goes wrong, darling just hold on).
and it’s not just the “hold on” thing that reoccurs. The words “strong” shows up a lot too and Jesus fuck “heart” must be their favorite word because it’s practically in every goddamn song (not surprisingly).
The chorus of Through the Dark just takes the cake, “I will hold you closer, hope your heart is strong enough, when the night is coming down, we will find a way through the dark.” Anyone else get major Home vibes? What the actual fuck man?
But can’t dwell on it too long, this is only the beginning my dear friend, because of course we’re back at it with the forbidden love.
“But I can’t hold you too close now, through the wire, through the wire.” This keeps happening, doesn’t it? Singing about hiding your love and being torn apart (and yet elounor do anything but hide). The bridge (sung by Harry dearest), “Whatever chains are holding you back, holding you back, don’t let them tie you down…tell me you believe in that.” Do I even have to explain at this point? They’re so fucking obvious I wanna scream. Actually, at this point the themes are so redundant, I’m just gonna list some more lyrics and let them speak for themselves:
“I think I’m gonna lose my mind, something deep inside me I can’t give up…I got a feeling deep inside, It’s taking all I got…’cause nobody knows you baby, the way I do (If I Could Fly vibes)…It’s been so long, we must be fireproof, ‘cause nobody saves me the way you do…I think I’m gonna win this time, riding on a wind and I won’t give up, I think I’m gonna win this time, I roll and I roll ‘till I change my luck.” Love wins, always.
“Then there’s me, a sinking boat running out of time. Without you I’ll never make it out alive, but I know, yes I know, we’ll be alright…There’s no way you can change the rolling tide, but I know, yes I know, that I’ll be fine…I don’t want to get lost in the dark of the night…’cause I wanna be free, and I wanna be young, I’ll never look back now I’m ready to run.”
“You say we’ll be together even you’re lost…Is it too much to ask for something great…The script was written and I could not change a thing. I want to rip it all to shreds and start again…You’re all I want, so much it’s hurting.” Okay but ouch :’(
“Used to sing about being free, but now he’s changed his mind.”
Do you get what I’m saying? Do you get why I call it redundant? Because these words and ideas take play in almost every fuckin song they write.
Now, turning to songs Harry has written that aren’t for One Direction: I Love You and Just a Little Bit of Your Heart.
“I fell in love in the morning sun while the hours slipped away. Sometimes when I hear your name, a smile creeps on my face.” Here we have Harry giving major Home vibes yet again.
“And I know that it sounds so wrong and you’ve heard it all before. I didn’t come back and I wasn’t there, I wont trouble you no more…Every time I try to fight it everything just turns out wrong. Maybe if I got my timing right, I wouldn’t end up alone.” I honestly don’t know how to explain these lyrics. I just feel like they have a special meaning and I have to include them. Harry doesn’t say or write anything just for the sake of it. He’s raw and honest and emotional.
“I fell in love with a beautiful boy and you still take my breath away. When you left it was the end of my world ‘cause I never got to say that I love you, more than you think I do.”
Now for a song that brings tears to my eyes and makes my heart heavy:
“I don’t ever ask you where you’ve been, and I don’t feel the need to know who you’re with. I can’t even think straight, but I can tell that you were just with her, and I’ll still be a fool, I’m a fool for you.” I don’t think this song is necessarily about cheating. It’s definitely about loving someone so much, you’re willing to share their heart. In a larrie perspective, this song gives major hints at how Harry feels about the stunting Lou does. He tries to hide the hurt from Louis because he knows its not under their control. Harry is a naturally jealous person presumably, and at one point in time he was incredibly insecure. It only makes sense that seeing Louis going out with beards and holding someone else’s hand would break him, even just a little. “I don’t ever tell you how I feel…and nothing’s ever easy, that’s what they say. I know I’m not your only, but I’ll still be a fool.”
“I know I’m not your only, but at least I’m one. I heard a little love is better than none.”
“Just a little bit of your heart is all I want…Just a little bit is all I’m asking for.”
Fuck pr stunts. Free my babies :’(
And okay, I know Ed wrote 18, but hear me out. “I have loved you since we were eighteen.” (or that one time on stage when Louis sang “I have loved him since we were eighteen.”). And then we have Steal My Girl, “She’s been my queen since we were sixteen.” I mean, Harry and Louis just happened to be sixteen and eighteen when they first met, but hey, that’s none of my business.
Okay, I’m just going to finish this off with Perfect, because if I try and get into Just Hold On or Sign of the Times, I’ll never finish this post. Also, because they fucking wrote it together.
“I might never be your night in shining armour, I might never be the one you take home to mother, and I might never be the one who brings you flowers.” I might not be able to love you publicly, I can’t treat you the way you want me to, I can’t hold you or show public signs of affection or show you to the world, but for now I can promise to love you.
“When I first saw you from across the room.” My mind just keeps bringing up that picture from X factor of L and H looking at each other from across the room through the crowd.
And the bloody chorus, just give me a moment because I’m tired of their asses and their need to reference forbidden love all the goddamn time, “But if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms, and if you like having secret little rendezvous. If you like to do the things you know that we shouldn’t do, then baby I’m perfect, baby I’m perfect for you.” WHAT HIDDEN LOVE HAVE THESE TWO EXPERIENCED? Their public het love life is anything but hidden. “And if you like midnight driving with the windows down, and if you like going places we can’t even pronounce, if you like to do whatever you’ve been dreaming about, then baby you’re perfect.” Hiding in the comfort of night, running around, traveling the world together. This chorus is deadass the Just Hold On music video. Funny how the one song Harry and Louis wrote together happens to explain their love story perfectly.
“I might never be the hands you put your heart in or the arms that hold you anytime you want them, but that don’t mean that we can’t live here in the moment, ‘cause I can be the one you love from time to time.” Once again, I can’t love you in public, but give me a chance to love you anyways, even if I wont always be there. The message stays standing throughout the song; I can’t promise perfection, but maybe we’re perfect for each other despite all this shit, so give me a chance, even if I can only give you so much.
“And if you like cameras flashing every time we go out, and if you’re looking for someone to write your breakup songs about, baby I’m perfect, baby we’re perfect.” Of course, people turned these lyrics into a Haylor thing (genuinely laughable). I’m just gonna say it, I think there are definitely times where they’ve taken a break from each other. I’m not gonna say broken up, because I strongly believe they’re still together and giving up at this point is the last thing on their minds, but theoretically, they’ve written breakup songs about each other (Where Do Broken Hearts Go, Love You Goodbye, I Love You (sung by Alex and Sierra), Spaces). I mean, Harry and Louis were so adamant to make it known that they had written this song together, they clearly hold this song near and dear to their hearts.
I dont know. This straight up became an essay. This is what happens when you’re a songwriter and a larrie, bye lmao.
love wins. always.
always you.
always in my heart.
yes, of course, always.

Reasons To Ship Stalia -Music Analysis

I’m sorry, but the Teen Wolf Music Department love Stalia because their songs connect so well to their ship, it hurts my little shipper heart. I did this for my college coursework icebreaker, I didn’t just do this for the fun of this, Teen Wolf actually is helping my education. Not all songs are included, as it would have been wayyyy too long, just the ones I could say loads about.

In context, their first song “Naughty Boy ft. Bastille - No One’s Here To Sleep,” is about a hotel, the song is from an album titled, “Hotel Cabana” and the song’s meaning, is how secrets are kept within the hotel’s walls between two or more people.

The line, “What goes on behind these doors; I’ll keep mine and you’ll keep yours; We all have our secrets,” has a clear meaning, however, think about where Stiles and Malia are when this scene is taking place, Eichen House. Somewhere people go when they need help, a mental institution; Malia is struggling to adapt with her new life and Stiles is trying to keep the Nogitsune buried down, they are both in very similar circumstances, trying to gain control. Revisiting this line, “What goes on behind these doors; I’ll keep mine and you’ll keep yours; We all have our secrets,” is juxtaposed by them, Stiles is the only one in Eichen that knows Malia is a werecoyote, he knows her secret. The song on a whole, is about keeping your own secrets, however, we know, by the end of the episode they both know each other’s darkest secrets, but they both trust each other.  

The line, “ You were always faster than me. I’ll never catch up with you, with you,” this song is from a male perspective and that makes sense as is most likely from Stiles’s view, Malia is physically stronger than Stiles, but that doesn’t affect their affection for one another, not one little bit; Stiles is possessed, so as he helps Malia, she becomes more human, she is one step ahead of him, whilst the Nogitsune keeps him one step behind, meaning he can’t catch up. However, the last line of the song is, “You were always faster than me. I will always catch up with you,” the songs are not added to an episode until the entire season is over, so the music department can tease what is coming up, having this song and the meaning shows you Stalia is gonna be present next season, the line “I will never catch up with you,” is now, “I will always catch up with you,” because Malia is Stiles’s human anchor when he is possessed, he let Void in to save her and in the end, it was her name that saved him (see 3x22, De-Void!) Meaning they are no longer one step behind each other, but in unison with one another.

Originally posted by bubblegumbubblesblog

Their second song, “Deptford Goth - Feel Real,” also makes a lot of sense to them with the circumstance they are both in. It’s about accepting that fact you are falling in love with someone. This part, “Now you’ve got to breathe. It’s only where your feet feel,” is about being knocked off your feet by your love interest, you need time to take it all in. “People so cool. Somebody wants you,“ for Stiles, this line means a lot, considering he has had a crush on one girl for so long, Lydia and now, the feeling of love is reciprocated; he was so used to it being one-sided and now, he doesn’t have to worry about that anymore. Malia likes him. He likes Malia. “I want to dance like her. Like nobody’s watching. But nobody’s watching,” means that they both don’t care if anyone is watching, they don’t care about the views of the people around them; which links more to the fandom, then the ship. Teen Wolf made stalia knowing some fans would not like it, but they did it and putting this song is the cherry on top of the cake, they did it, they liked it and they know some of the fanbase would too.

Forever meant nothing when he had nothing,” here’s two people, who right now, have nothing, Malia doesn’t know if her Father will ever accept her and Stiles doesn’t know if he can beat Void Stiles, so this line means everything. They don’t care about forever because they have nothing, but each other, at that moment, at that time was more important to them then forever.

Originally posted by staliadaily

Their third song, “I could love you more by The Miracals,” is clearly about being scared to love someone too much. Which makes sense, the last people Malia loved with all her heart are her sister and her mother, who passed away and Stiles, he loved his Mother with all his heart and he lost her. They are both new to being in love and being in a relationship, they are afraid that if they love each other too much if they lose each other, it will hurt more. The line, “I could love you more than you’d love me. I could love your summer clothes. I could love you, but I’ll stop before it grows,” links to this, they are in love and they care for one another, nevertheless they are scared to let their love grow, because to both of them love equals loss.

Stalia’s first mini-breakup song links so well to who they both are. The song is “Breathe By of Verona,” is about their relationship, what they mean to each other, but it is changed, as this is about Malia’s heartbreak to know that her boyfriend held back the truth of who her father is. “Beautiful can’t begin to describe you. Or what you mean to me.” This song is sung by a woman, which is the first in the Stalia songs and makes strict sense as it is most definitely from Malia’s view; she sees Stiles as the light in her dark life and has since Eichen House, to her, he is perfect, until she finds out about Peter, maybe beautiful is how she used to describe him, but now it’s not enough, she’s confused, she doesn’t know how to describe him and she knows that he means the world to her, but he lied.

As we both come undone. Open up your world. Show me the deepest secrets. I would I’d understand. Watching us burn. Into a million pieces. One touch of your hand,” is about how they both fell in love in a vulnerable mental state, they revealed their darkest secrets to one another and this sentence is about how they forgave each other for all the wrong they have done, but this time, Stiles withheld the truth and Malia is not used to this, so she walks away, watching them “burn into a million pieces,” because Stiles didn’t tell her.

Originally posted by iwouldgiveyouthebite

Jerome Holloway’s “Who Will Love Me,” is the perfect song to describe Stiles’s emotions after his fall out with Malia as she is the first girl to ever love him as much as he loves her and he messed her, she left and he’s broken, not sure where to turn. “ It’s too late for me to cry oh no no no no nooo who will love me in the winter who will love me when it’s cool,” shows that Stiles is afraid because he let himself love someone and now he’s lost her, which hurts him too much and he is afraid, she will never come back.

Originally posted by staliadaily

Eliza Hull - Echoes,” is about reconnecting with someone you were sure you had lost, although, it is once again a female’s (Malia’s) view, meaning she never thought, after Stiles hid the truth of her biological Father that she could forgive him, but she does because she is in love with him. “Closer. Feel it rising above. Heartstrings, pull me back to you,” she can’t help falling in deeper in love with Stiles, she is always pulled back to him; no matter how hard she tries, she loves him. Now here’s an important line, “I know that it is time to take you home,” after this scene, Malia and Stiles literally go back to his house; in the songs, and in spoken scenes, that Stiles’s house is ”home,“ to both of them. 

As I mentioned before, the songs are added after a season is recorded so, “Too Far Moon - Til My Heart Stops,” makes sense for a silent Stalia scene where Malia wipes the question, “who is the desert wolf?” off the board, as the song is about losing the one you love, so the music department knew Stalia was having a break up scene and this song foreshadows it, “My love, my love. Where have you gone?” Refers to the fact, that for one, in the next episode Stiles accidentally kills Donovan, and in turn, this starts the downfall of their relationship. It also links to the “desert wolf,” because she also scares Malia, as she wants to hurt Stiles to get to Malia. So, “my love, my love. Where have you gone?” Doesn’t just foreshadow the break-up, but it foreshadows the post break-up and how that both of them are at a crossroads with loving and losing one another. 

Fast-forward to season six, in the scene in 6x01, when Stiles keeps photobombing Malia, the song “Cheat Codes ft. Evan Gartner - Adventure,” plays. The song is cheerful and bouncy, the lyrics have a deeper meaning, as it links back to the more happier times in their relationship, “I’ll hold on to every word you’ve ever said,” talks about, even though they no longer together, both of them will cherish the relationship and hold onto it. “Give me something I won’t forget,” there is something deeply ironic about this, as Malia did forget Stiles this season, however, the song is sung from a man’s point of view and the line before this was, “For the dreams in my head,” which links back to when Stiles lost Malia and dreamt about her spooning him. This song is about how Stiles will never let the memories of Malia go, no matter if they aren’t as close as they used to be.

Wake Up (Keith x Reader)

Anonymous said to saturnkeith:

STORY TIME *cue dramatic backstory-telling music* i was watching voltron animatics and i stumbled across this klance one titled “STAY // KLANCE” or something like that and it actually made me cry cuz i’m an emotional mess. I decided to pick my favorite vld imagines writer and ask them to make me potentially cry again with a scenario based off the song from that animatic: Wake Up by Eden. so here i am, asking you to overwhelm me with Keith x reader angst thank you! you’re an amazing writer! Xxx

Thank you omg :’) Hearing that I’m your favorite makes me so happy, gah, I never know how to react with compliments. I hope I tore your heart apart with angst <3 – Saturn


Keith Kogane had a series of issues you’d accepted once you started dating. He was hot-headed, impatient at times, prone to reckless choices that left you feeling like you had a heart attack, prone to believe that you were better off without him. He was also bright, intelligent, loyal almost to a fault, he’d saved you multiple times, he was a leader. Keith was a loner, but you’d been trying to help him accept people into his life, to show him that it was okay to be loved, that it was okay to be afraid. That it was okay to grow past his fears.

When he’d learned he was part Galra, it was like all that progress was thrown out the window. He was on his own more, refusing to be seen, hiding more, hating himself. You tried, but he was stubborn. It was like speaking through a closed door, trying desperately to hear and understand him when his voice was muffled beyond comprehension. A door with a hundred locks that Keith was too afraid to open, too afraid to allow someone else on his side, in fear of abandonment.

That was just Keith, and you accepted him, you loved him. When he finally let you back in, it was still as if there was a door between the two of you. Even as you laid in his bed beside him, listening to him breath, knowing that he was awake but being too afraid to say anything, the door was there, locks creaking. You reached out, letting your fingers trace the muscles of his back. You loved him too much, too much to let a door separate the two of you. You’d keep knocking, waiting for him to be ready.

You’d wait forever if it came to it, it was Keith.

You’d fall into restless sleep beside each other, tossing and turning through the night, never coming together, never cuddling as you once had. Your backs turned to each other. His bed was never made for two. You were pressed against the wall, wishing nothing more than to turn, to pull him into you, make him feel the love you had for him. Words were no longer enough, you couldn’t just tell Keith, you had to make him believe it. But how?

Tears threatened to fall, your eyes burning as you squeezed them shut, urging yourself to fall into another restless, dreamless sleep.

“Goodnight,” you murmured quietly, wondering if Keith was still awake or if he’d fallen asleep, “I love you.”

There was no response, only the shuffle that proved he was awake. You looked over your shoulder, his back to you, face into the pillow, shoulders frozen and tense. You turned back around, facing the wall, falling into a restless sleep.

It was another fight with Lotor and his forces.

The Paladins had been dealt a bad deck, loosing and splitting apart, red error messages popping up everywhere on the Castle. You tried in vain to protect the Castle from Galra fighter ships, but there was only so much you could do, with most energy going to keeping the particle barrier alive. You’d been suggesting changes forever, the thing never stayed up long enough. Every battle it found a way to come down, today was no different.

You were losing, in over your heads as you tried to reclaim a tiny planet from the Galra overlords when Prince Lotor himself decided to descend upon the Planet. You weren’t fit to take on his forces, everyone was already tired, you’d began doubting if even Voltron was strong enough to take on the forces. There were too many of them, not enough of you. The odds had always been stacked against you, but today seemed especially worse.

“Keith, don’t!”

Like whiplash, you turned at the flash of black. Keith descended upon Lotor, his reckless impulses once again replicating a heart attack. Your hands shook violently as you grabbed the radio, taking a deep breath.

“Keith, he’s too powerful, you can’t,” You said.
“Who says?” He spits in return, words full of venom, “things will be better. Even if I die.”
“How can you say that?” You yelled, feeling tears come to your eyes, “you aren’t the best fucking pilot in the universe, doesn’t mean you need to throw it away. Stop… You have people looking up to you, you can’t… Stay.”
“I can’t do that,” He said, “I have too!”

Keith’s radios cut out, Lotor slashing across the body of Black, sending both her and Keith flying backward. A gasp tore from your throat, firing blasters at the group only for Lotor to evade them easily as if they were nothing.

“He’s not responding,”
“We have to pull back.”

He laid across from you, a guilty look on his face, refusing to meet your eyes, head turned to the sheets. How had this gone on for so long? How did the two of you make it this far? You’d loved each other fiercely, in the beginning, unable to leave the comfort of his sheets at a time, earning the disgust of the fellow paladins. Wrapped in each other’s embrace, freely loving, unafraid.

Now you laid together, shells of who you once were, lovers who went wrong somewhere along the way. Was it the stress? Had you two just grown apart? Had it come to this? When did you go from passionate lovers to this?

“You were so prepared to die out there,” You choked out, “you…”
“I had to do it, it was our best chance,” Keith protested, keeping his voice low.

You faced him in the darkness, reaching out to touch his face, feeling his skin beneath your palm, his tacky cheeks giving away the fact that he’d cried. He was hurt, he always was. There were always wounds in him that even you couldn’t mend, fresh and old that refused to scar over. Wounds on his heart that made him question everything about himself.

“Who said you were so great, hot shot? Great enough to take on Lotor by yourself.”

You made no attempt to hide your tears, flowing freely over your face, dampening the pillow beneath your face. His pillow. The stale sheets, the room smelling so much like him. It was as if you’d already broken up, facing each other crying your hearts out, accepting your love wasn’t as it used to be.

“You’re better than that,” You cried softly, “You’re so much better than that.”
“Am I really?” Keith scoffed, sarcasm evident in his sharp tone that made another cut in your heart.

This wasn’t your Keith. Not the one you fell in love with at least.

“I’m going to sleep,” Keith said, turning his back to you.

You stared at his back for a while, watching his shoulders rise as he breathed. He was the leader now. With Shiro missing, he had an obligation to his team, to Allura and Coran who had lost everything, to try. That didn’t mean throwing it all away for one lucky shot. You reached out to him but stopped halfway. He’d made it obvious he wasn’t happy.

He was the leader of Voltron, and yet his words fell flat to your ears. Allura, Coran, Pidge, Lance and Hunk all looked at him as if he was on in a million, like everything he said was somehow the right thing. You loved Keith, you did, but you were able to accept his faults. He was a flawed boy, and there was nothing wrong with that, but he wasn’t one a million, and he didn’t always say the right thing. Sometimes he messed up, sometimes he did the wrong thing.

It didn’t make you love him any less.

You were the closest to Earth you ever had been, and the tense atmosphere had spread through the Castle, a mutual heartbreak that you were so close to your homes, to your old lives, but still too far away to touch it, to get a taste of what once was, was heartbreaking. You wondered how Keith had taken it, among the loss to Lotor, being so close to home.

You wiped your tears, turning on your side, your back brushes against Keith’s. The first time you’d slept in the same bed, you ended up staying all night together, talking about everything under the book, his family, your family, what you wanted from the future, what you were back on Earth, your insecurities and dreams, everything. You barely talked like that anymore. How long had it been? You couldn’t tell.

“Goodnight,” you said softly, “I still love you.”

Keith said nothing in return, only keeping his back against yours.

It was an hour when you woke up. There was a soft commotion in the room, Keith’s body no longer pressed to yours, the bed sheets cold in his absence. He sat, pulling on his boots, a bag next to him. The drawers of his dresser had been pulled open, nothing left in them. Pictures taken along the way were stuffed into his bag. Keith leaned down, zipping in close, stealing a glance back at you.

You sat up slowly, tears coming to your eyes again. You couldn’t go a day without crying now.

“Go back to sleep,” he said, “it’s fine.”
“It’s not fine,” Your voice broke, reaching out to him as he stood off the bed.
“I’ve made up my mind,” he said, “I can’t keep doing this. I’m going back to the Blade.”
“We need you here… You’re the leader…”

Keith shook his head, slinging his bag over his shoulder, starting towards the door.

“Shiro is the leader,” he said, “not me. He’ll be back.”

He opened the door, the whizz of it opening and closing being enough to draw you to your senses. You stood out of the bed, the blanket catching around your ankles, constricting you from moving. You cursed silently, pushing it violently off you as you wiggled off the floor, bolting towards the door. The castle was dark at night, only the light of the moon guiding you down the vast hallways.

You moved fast through the corridors, catching him finally.

“Please,” you begged, “Stay. You can’t leave me. This is right where you need to be.”
“No, it isn’t,” Keith replied, exasperated, “there’s a better place for me.”
“Stop you can’t just… I don’t want you to fall Keith… Please, come back to bed. You’ll feel better in the morning.”

He stared at you for a moment, moonlight bouncing off the tears of his cheeks, highlighting the bag over his shoulder. You couldn’t let him do this. If he walked out, would you ever get to see him again? Would you be able to fix this once he was gone? He was ready to keep the door locked forever, and you weren’t done knocking. You weren’t done trying to get in, to get him to accept you and the rest of the paladins.

“Stay, you aren’t thinking clearly… You may not be one in a million, but you’re better than that. Stay, Keith, please.”

Keith Kogane was a lot of things. Hot-headed, short-tempered, reckless and brave, he was hurt. Broken. Struggling with who he was, with abandonment, struggling to let people in again. Struggling to love when he didn’t know how. Struggling with his desire to escape Voltron, to escape the heavy responsibility of being a leader and to stay, to reclaim what he had with you, to love freely and fiercely.

“You can’t just make decisions like this,” Tears came faster down your cheeks, “you can’t… I love you. The others love you. We don’t want to do this without you.”

The Castle was dark, matching the atmosphere. Even the moonlight couldn’t shine in the darkest of places. You weren’t ready to give up. You clenched your fists, nails digging into your palms enough to draw blood. Your nose was full from crying so much, head beginning to pound from lack of sleep and all the crying.

Even if it was dark, there was always light someplace. It was shining somewhere in the universe, and even if it was far away, you’ll find it with him. You’ll find it so Keith can feel the sun shining on him, to feel warm, and know what it’s like to be loved, to love in return. You’ll find it for him. Even if you had to go through a hundred Galra fleets, fight a hundred battles that left you exhausted, it was worth it.

To bring light back into the Universe. For its inhabitants.

Keith’s bag fell to the floor, his head tilted to the ground, shoulders shaking as he cried. The moment changed, light from the stars and moon flooding in, driving the darkness out. You moved forward, throwing your arms around him, holding him close as you had before it all went wrong. Keith held you in his arms, crying softly into your shoulder, holding you tighter than he ever had.

The locks he kept, the door that kept the two of you apart seemed to crumble, you felt him, you heard him and understood him clearly. His fears, his insecurities, his motives. You could fix this. Your lips pressed against the side of his face, keeping him close.

“You’re so much better than you think are, please, let me in.”

Goodbye’s the Only Way

Words: 1216

Player: Auston Matthews (Toronto Maple Leafs)

Warning/s: uh sad? I got a little too drama with this

Song: Shadow of the Day by Linkin Park

Originally posted by nylanderhoe

There it was. The knock that would break your heart. You didn’t want to hurt your friends, that’s why you had kept this secret ever since you made the decision. But you had to. If you wouldn’t, you were going to completely break down. You just couldn’t stay in Toronto, not after what happened. 

After your brother got into an accident at home, you had no idea if he would make it. But the saddest thing was that you weren’t there. Flights were canceled and you were stuck on a different continent. If he would’ve died, you would’ve never forgiven yourself. And it was eating you up from the inside that you hadn’t been there when he needed you there. You needed to be closer to your family in case something like that happened ever again.

“Y/n, are you there?”, Mitch’s familiar voice asked through the door. 

There was no hiding it now. Your Apartment was empty, only boxes scattered around. The moving truck people would come the next day to ship some of your belongings back home. And that would be it.

The last trace of you would be out of Toronto. Out of Canada. Out of North America.

You made a mistake when you moved overseas. 

“Y/n, I know you’re there. Just open. Please.”, William pleaded.

You sighed but you extended your hand and opened the door in front of you.
They were all there, not just Mitch and William. Steph was there, Lex was there and Connor was right next to her. Even Auston.

And it was his appearance that caused your fake brave smile to falter. You had been nothing but a jerk to him, you treated him like a stranger. But he still showed up.

At least you knew for sure that Steph was right when she told you, that Mitch had told Auston the truth. You just wish Mitch hadn’t. It only made it worse.

“Why are you doing this, Y/n?”, William asked gently. 

He was the first to spot all the boxes. You tried to bring the brave smile back, but your eyes filled with tears instead and you sniffled.

“I can’t do this. I- I thought I could just move on and don’t change anything, but it was a mistake. I can’t. Just the thought of what could happen hurts too much.”, you cried, your voice cracking. 

A sob escaped your lips. William didn’t hesitate to move forward and pull you into a tight embrace. 

“I have to do this. I can’t stay.”, you sobbed as his arms closed around you. 

Willy leaned his head against yours and you spotted a glance of Steph and Lex who were tearing up. Mitch came closer and rubbed calming circles on your back. 

“We all know, Älskling. We know.”, Willy muttered into your ear, his own voice cracking, “You’re still in shock and you’re scared. You have every right to be. Just do what feels right for you. If moving back is what feels right, we’re going to be there for you.”

The others were all quietly listening to your conversation as you hid your face in the crook of his neck. Willy squeezed you tightly.

He was the reason you had come to Toronto in the first place. Because he was your best friend. And now you were losing him, your best friend since you could remember. The best friend you had ever had and could’ve had. It made the pain that you already felt ten times worse to know that you were hurting him too with your actions.

“I’ll see you on Christmas then, alright? Don’t you dare think about ignoring me now, or else Alex is never going to talk to me again.”, he joked, although his cracking voice told you the true story. 

You let out a watery giggle. “I will. I promise.”

“No matter if you come back or not, I’ll be there okay?”

You nodded solemnly as he kissed the top of your head and stepped back to get some kind of control over his emotions back. 

Mitch hugged you before anyone else could. 

“You’re going to be fine, you know. You’ll get over what happened.”, he assured you. 

“I’m so sorry for letting all of you down.”

“You’re not letting us down. Never. If this is what you feel like you have to, don’t be ashamed of it. We’ll support you no matter what. We’re still your friends. No matter if you’re back in Sweden or here.”, he reminded you. 

But after that, he pulled away. They all did. Willy, Mitch, Steph, Lex. And every time they did, it felt like another painful jab to your guts.

You should have just left. Saying goodbye to them was only torturing you more. And the guilt you felt was growing. 

“Goodbye.”, you said, voice barely above a whisper. 

And just like that they were all gone, leaving only you and Auston. 

“I’m so sorry for the way I treated you. I-”

“It’s okay. I get it. Mitch told me the truth. It was your way of pushing me away.”, he muttered. But he didn’t even look at you, “I just wish you hadn’t.”

He moved inside and to your open kitchen, where he sat down on the counter, still without looking up.
You felt like curling up in a ball and crying for years. You had never seen Auston avoid eye contact and look so down. Not once since you knew him. And when he looked up, you were almost shocked by the heartbreak and worry you saw in his eyes. 

You were the cause of this. You never wanted him to worry about you. 

“I’m sorry, Aus.”, you apologized, “I was afraid that you wouldn’t let me leave if I told you the truth. If I had said it back when you told me you love me… I already made the decision. I didn’t want to hurt you more.”

“Too late.”, he huffed quietly. 

You could see the way he was fighting for the right words for a moment until he let out a frustrated noise. “I just don’t understand why you had to push me away in the first place. I could’ve been there for you. We could’ve found a solution for this.”

“Aus, it’s not that easy to find a solution for this. I don’t even know if there is one. Right now, I just need to be at home with my family. I need to leave. I am scared. I feel guilty. I don’t want to pull anyone else down with me. I know that you all want to help… but you can’t.”

“So there is no chance that you will stay and let me try?”, he tried.

“No. I’m sorry, Aus.”

Auston dropped his head and sighed, but he finally gave up. He finally admitted to himself that there was nothing he could do. He couldn’t force you to stay in Toronto. He was losing you and it hurt like a bitch.

Review of 14x01 “Break Down the House” and 14x02 “Get Off on the Pain “

“The painful irony for doctors is that we often have to make you sicker in order to heal you.”

There are a few things we can count on with Grey’s Anatomy.  One, the voiceovers are meaningful.  The words that begin and end each episode are intentional.  Two, most seasons (13 was a glaring exception) are written with the end in mind.  Where our characters start is rarely where they finish.  However, where they start is still important.   Three, when the show promises a lighter, happier season, we will always get the exact opposite.  With that said, once I heard the opening voiceover, I knew we should expect pain and lots of it.  And in true Grey’s fashion, they delivered.

Let’s start somewhere easy.  

Ben/Bailey-  Benley spent most of the two hours snacking on the stairs of the main lobby, overanalyzing the construction workers, and discussing shoes. When I heard Ben would be going to the spin-off I wondered what their story would be this season. Season 12 brought us rebellious Ben who sliced people open with clipboards and waited for his wife to chastise him.  Season 13 brought us doormat Bailey who let Catherine Avery intimidate her into thinking she didn’t know how to run a hospital, which of course, led to the terribleness that was the Eliza storyline. So for season 14, I could do with a little less Benley. I adore both of them, but honestly, I would be okay with them staying on the stairs.  

Megan/Nathan/Meredith - Megan’s return is something we have all been waiting for since we heard she was only” presumed dead.”  It could possibly be the least shocking return from the dead in the history of television.  Predictability aside, I appreciate that while this feels like a different version of Addison showing up in her fur coat, Mer and Megan stayed mature in an awkward situation.  They are setting up Mer and Nathan’s relationship much better than last season as well.  In season 13, we collectively cringed each time Nathan asked Meredith out because after fifteen rejections, you’ve got to take a hint, man.  By the time they ended up on the plane together it felt so forced that it was hard to root for them.  Having Nathan show that he is torn between the two is warming me up to Griggs more, though.  And that proposal scene has so much secondhand awkwardness that I literally threw my blanket over my head so I didn’t have to watch.  My guess is that in the end, Megan will choose her son over Nathan and return to Iraq, and Nathan and Mer will find their way back to each other after an entire season of pining from afar.  

Amelia/Owen/Teddy - I thought Teddy was such a nice addition to these two episodes.  She was absolutely correct that Mer operating on Megan is a conflict of interest, and I think Teddy and Owen have great chemistry.  Just like Megan’s return, Amelia’s brain tumor also feels like a new version of an old story - Izzie’s brain tumor.  Are we going to see her freeze her eggs as well?  Because all Owen Hunt has wanted for the last 74 years is a baby, and he clearly has no problem finding a new woman if he needs to.  Staying faithful is not his strong point.  As much as I like Owen and Teddy’s chemistry, I felt that having Owen cheat on his wife who wouldn’t give him a baby yet again, really put a dent in his character.  Giving Amelia a tumor should make for some great dramatic scenes with Owen, Amelia, Mer, etc., but it also pushes the “Owen finally gets a baby” story back another season.  And really, unless Caterina leaves, which I don’t think she will, Amelia will be fine.  Krista said in an interview that she wanted to explain Amelia’s ooc actions (a nice way of saying bad writing) so she decided to give her a tumor.  That’s how bad things got in season 13.  They can only be explained by a brain tumor.  Nice.

Jo/Alex/Deluca - Looks like they quickly kicked Deluca out of the picture, and made it pretty clear this will not be a triangle.  Every time Alex or Jo started talking to each other I so badly wanted one of them to say, “Why I haven’t I seen you in eight weeks?”  Last season they could barely look at each other without getting teary-eyed and mopey, and this season they act like most of s13 didn’t happen.  I guess that is another way Krista is trying to fix the writing.  Just act like it didn’t happen.  I wish we had that luxury.  I am a Jolex fan.  I think they belong together, and I want to see them get rid of Paul and live happily ever after.  Unfortunately, happily ever after usually lasts about five episodes on this show, so the fact that they are so happy in the premiere makes me nervous for where their story will go from here.  Also, I know Jo sleeping with the intern was supposed to be shocking and funny, but it made me cringe.  For a woman who has been with multiple abusive men in the past, Jo going home with a man who is essentially a stranger seemed ooc.  Also, she snuck out of his room in the morning and then had sex with Alex hours later in the Resident’s Lounge.  I hope she showered in between.

Arizona/Carina - Carina is already better than Eliza, but I am not completely sold on this story.  This was also incredibly predictable.  Once she was announced as joining the show, most of the fans called that she was joining for Arizona.  How did we know?  Because that seems to be the only story Arizona can have.  I am all for her finding someone and finding happiness, but I would like to see Arizona, the doctor, again as well.  

April/Jackson/Maggie - Before I say anything else, I have to say that Sarah Drew is incredible.  Her heartbreak was so real and so tangible that it made an unbearable scene beautiful.  

I see this from two angles.  One perspective is the show (Krista? Shonda?) wants to end Japril and has decided to put Jackson with Maggie because (like Arizona) hooking her up with someone seems to be the ultimate goal, while her abilities as a doctor and her character development are ignored.  There were some hints that this may happen.  I think Jackson and Maggie may have been trying to have some moments, but it is so hard to tell.  I have to rewatch their scenes and analyze are they being intentionally awkward or is the awkwardness a result of their lack of chemistry?  Is that a confused look or a thinking look? Was that a smile or a grimace?  With Japril and Maggie/Nathan and Maggie/Deluca their feelings were always clear.  Now whatever they are doing is making their already painful scenes more difficult to watch.  If Jackson and Maggie is something they pursue, they will have a hard time getting the audience on board.  The majority is adamantly against it, and they will never come out from Japril’s shadow.  Japril’s story cannot be matched or recreated, so Jackson/Maggie would eventually become a side couple who just happen to be on a show that people are watching for Griggs or Jolex. As viewers we feel so disrespected that there is no saving that ship in our eyes. From this perspective it was difficult to watch Jackson sit there and not respond.  Or to accept the idea that he would think sex to April could ever be casual.  It was heartbreaking.

Another perspective I see is that Japril may not be completely dead.  I am not at all trying to give out false hope.  I saw what you saw.  But as painful as it was, I am happy that April said what she was feeling and that Jackson was clearly bothered by knowing he had hurt her.  And as much as I wanted him to fight for her, to say something, anything, watching them sit in silence, holding hands made me think about how through everything, the love and respect has remained.  They may be the only couple in the history of the show who have stayed faithful to each other no matter what.  The writers could have destroyed them completely.  We easily could have seen a Jackson/Maggie hook-up that would have broken them in a different way.  Instead, we saw April tell Jackson what she needed to say and Jackson listened.  Writing the scene that way leaves that trust, respect, and love in tact so that it can be revived.  The episode had a couple of other moments made me wonder if they were hints as well.  Maggie’s relationship with Deluca was brought up for the first time in forever, and Maggie seemed pretty excited that he called her beautiful.  Granted, Maggie would get excited about a man offering her a tissue when she sneezes, but again, Grey’s does not write random lines.  Plus, Deluca is officially out of Jolex’s relationship, I believe.  So that is something to keep an eye on.  Also, Maggie and Webber had a clear father/daughter scene where he talked about hoping she got her talent from him.  So, for anyone arguing he isn’t her dad, the show seems to say otherwise.  I thought it was interesting they put that scene in if they have any thoughts of Jackson and Maggie happening.  Krista says April has a complicated journey this season.  I would argue that she has had a complicated journey every season, but for them to openly say it has my wheels turning with ideas.  And of course, these things on top of Jesse and Sarah’s open support and love for Japril leaves me with a flicker of hope.  

They left hope for a reason.  If we are to believe the words that opened and closed the show, then this season will be about breaking things down to build them up better the second time.  

We’ve seen how they are going to break things.  Now let’s see how they fix it.

“The painful irony for doctors is that we often have to make you sicker in order to heal you. If a bone is healed unevenly, we have to re-break it. If a scar is too thick, we have to scrape it off and create a new wound. We break you down to rebuild you. We go to medical school because we want to learn how to fix what’s broken, but we quickly learn that we often have to make things worse before we can make them better. It’s risky, and it’s frightening for surgeons and for patients, but usually, it’s worth it. You get a second chance at life, and we get to be the architects of your second chance. It’s win-win, when it works.”

Once Upon a Waste of Time - An open Letter to Adam Horowitz and Eddy Kitsis.

Dear Adam and Eddy,

After watching #OnceUponaTime #OUAT & had a chance to process it there are a number of things I’m really not happy or comfortable with and I would really like them addressed.

Why did you deem it perfectly acceptable to use the term “nut house” in the show? Please don’t ever use that term again. It’s stigmatising mental illness & there’s enough of that in the world already. It only endorses name calling being okay to use against those who suffer with mental illnesses.

The Q&A was talking of hope and belief. But when it comes to the marginalised oppressed groups it was pitiful in representation. In fact, the number of POC and LGBTQ characters you had on your show were extremely disproportionate to the real world. Most of your POC characters ended up with terrible fates. Such as Merlin, Stanham (Tin man), Marian, I don’t even remember what happened to Rapunzel… yikes! Only one POC couple Aladdin and Jasmine represented POC with a happy ending. I don’t even recall seeing any others present for happy endings. That’s how disproportionate it was with POC representation.

The one f/f queer pairing you had, which was written by two of your MALE employees in your writing team and therefore had no feminine perspective, was rushed together without development and made it into some stereotype of lesbians meet and fall in love in a day and move in together. That was eye rolling enough, but to top it off, they only got one episode out of six years of your show, and were not even even present for the happy endings moment. Seemingly nobody thought to invite them to the wedding, which even if the actresses couldn’t make, would have taken a moment to write in saying Ruby and Dorothy couldn’t make it, but send their love and congratulations. We didn’t even see them in Oz when Zelena took everyone back to her Emerald City castle.
I hate to break it to you guys but treating a f/f ship differently to that of the heterosexual pairings you have on the show, is not equality. It’s merely ticking a box to say yep we covered LGBTQ, and it is in that inequality that gave it the “I’m not homophobic… but” feel to it. The bottom line is that there shouldn’t be inequality. Even the disproportionate numbers of LGBTQ and POC characters to heterosexual and white characters ratio comes across as sexuality and racial inequality.

Regina being a middle aged Latina woman only got apples and dwarfs showing her acceptance which she has been getting for 4 seasons now. She’s happy with herself, I get that, but why did the Latina queen only ever get heartbreak in love and not even get a romantic love in her life for her happy ending? Are Latina’s destined to be without a lover? Or is it just middle aged women destined to be alone if they haven’t found a lover by a certain point? I understand she would have been grieving Robin, but there wasn’t even a hint of hope that she could be with someone in the future. Not a start of anything. Zelena being older than Regina didn’t have one either. So all the middle aged female fans who are currently alone right now, who watched the show for a bit of hope that maybe they would find love one day, didn’t get that hope as they weren’t validated.

I understand happiness doesn’t always involve having a lover in your life but to the marginalised oppressed groups Latinas, middle aged women, and LGBTQ, you didn’t deliver any substantial hope for them to believe that they too could find happiness because you did not represent them. Didn’t even represent anyone in the trans community at all. So all those people who watched with the hope of a “Modern Fairytale” didn’t take away with them a message of hope and belief as they weren’t accurately represented. They just took home the message that everyone else deserved a happy ending but them.

And the final thing I’m really annoyed with, is that you had the greatest love story with SwanQueen. Every single message on the show about what love is, they demonstrated. SwanQueen in my opinion, was the greatest love story never told. Six years and one kinda uncomfortable looking hug is unrealistic for best friends, especially with the way the actors were directed to play them, and with all the queer-baiting subtext. But to add insult to injury you have the same initial situation of a kid looking for and finding their parent, and have openly stated that Henry and his daughter’s mother who he will meet again will have an epic love story… so basically it’s pretty much SwanQueen but the heterosexual version of it. The SwanQueen story was so good, but just not heteronormative to tell on TV. I want to know, WHY? And please don’t use the excuse “family show” anymore because the sexual content of this show, albeit no sex was actually taking place in it, does not make this family viewing. Nor does violence and murder either.

I’d like some answers around this and not to be ignored or blocked because you don’t like me putting you in front of a mirror to examine yourselves. There was even a time you baited Swen in an obvious way by tweeting a script tease of a SwanQueen scene which you had cut from the show!

Adam, you have stalked Swen accounts and there are multiple cases where there is evidence of you doing that. I want to know why you used us for viewership if your heteronormative love story was something you were so certain of being successful?

You had a little over 12 million viewers at the start of your show. And the latest figures were around 2.8 million if I’m not mistaken. How do you deem this as success? You used Swen to keep you afloat for another season didn’t you? You could at the very least have the decency to be honest and admit that.

You’ve lost a viewer in me, not just with Once Upon a Time, but with all future shows you decide to create, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who has made this decision. Once Upon a Time was sold as a “Modern Fairytale” but that was false advertising really. The only thing modern about it was the characters had cell phones and spoke of Hamilton tickets, oh and Snow White held a sword for the first time… 🤦🏼‍♀️ Big whoop! Nothing modern here or even groundbreaking. Same old story of predominantly white, cis gendered, heterosexual couples getting their happy endings and leaving everyone else lacking them. If that’s your idea of a “modern fairytale”, then I’m sure all your future endeavours as writers will be just as same old, same old.

kisses and love for the klonnie fam

it’s been like 4 years and i just wanted to s/o all the folks who’ve made me fall in love with this ship, inspired me to write, and supported me in a variety of ways:

@cheleonrage712: this girl is a BEAST y’all. She’s written cross overs for Bonnie and Klaus with almost every fandom imaginable, from Black Panther to Game of Thrones. Writes some of the most amazing kidfic out there, with kid OC’s that have the most adorable personalities, and is always reblogging and boosting other writers and artists. One time she wrote a drabble about klaus having a tea party with his and Bonnie’s daughter that was so FREAKING CUTE it made me lie down and cry. No joke.

@bonneibennett: my OG! She’s best known as queen of the b*amon fandom and possibly the most perfect cinnamon roll to ever roll, but she’s also a multishipping STAR whose amazing klonnie gifsets and graphics sucked me in. Nisha also has the dubious honor of reccing me my first klonnie fic that forever cemented my love for the ship and ruined my life. Without her encouragement and amazing artwork I would’ve never taken the plunge to writing klonnie. I mean, just look at this talent right here. Enough said.

@darwinquark: another beast of a girl who’s always around when i’m feeling EXTRA SALTY about that one Ship That Must Not Be Named. Her one klonnie fic is so amazing and she herself is so freaking talented. I mean, she gifs, she vids, she edits, she writes, she throws shade like no one’s business. Is there anything this girl can’t do????

@thebennettdiaries: UH-MAZING writer and lovely person. Seriously, this girl is like writing #goals. Wrote one of the hottest klonnie fics TO DATE that I always return to when I need inspiration, incredibly supportive to other writers, always down to talk plot bunnies and headcanons, and consistently fills the klonnie tag with amazing drabbles and chapters. A veteran of the klonnie fandom and one of my all time faves.

@iputaspxllonyou:  runs like one of the most beautiful Bonnie Bennett RP blogs I’ve ever seen, is undiluted 100% klonnie trash, and aside from being a talented writer herself, is always around to help me talk ideas and scenarios and read over scenes I’m having trouble with. One of the wittiest people I know, takes no shit, and writes some of the most heartbreaking and beautiful stuff. She has a drabble about Klaus helping Bonnie babysit the neighbor’s kids that I’m pretty sure made me ovulate spontaneously. 10/10 would recommend.

@thehedgerider: YO this girl always leaves the best reviews, smart as a whip and has a brain that can assemble and disassemble stories at the drop of a hat. She started writing Klonnie fic last summer and her very first fic SOMEHOW managed to take 8 years of shitty shitty canon and weave it into something magnificent that develops Bonnie and Klaus both individually and as a couple. I still don’t know how she managed it. Tbh she may have sold her soul to the devil, cos it was that.freaking.brilliant. Also always around to talk sensibly when I’m freaking out about canon stupidity. Bless your heart girl. Go read her fics!

@lilac17: once upon a time I said a prayer for someone to write a klonnie babyfic where everyone’s in character, the cuteness is balanced with development, the angst is paired with fluff, and Bonnie has agency and Klaus grows as a person, and the fandom gods sent THIS GIRL. She’s also currently writing a soulmate fic that breaks and restores my heart in every chapter, and her mastery of emotional conflict breathes so much intimacy and warmth into her stories it’s almost unbearable. She’s also a sweetheart who supports other fans and always stands up for creativity. Go read her stuff and catch all the feels!

@thefudge: if y’all follow us both then you know we spend an inordinate amount of time up each other’s butts so please excuse this gratuitous affection. But YO, she’s my trash sis for a reason. My evil twin. My road dog. My fellow bride of Dracula. The other raccoon in the dumpster with me. This girl is the Lestat to my Robert Redford. She’s such a gifted writer it’s ridiculous y’all. I mean, go see for yourself. Whether it’s gothic romance or bittersweet indie ventures, I always end up flailing and demanding more. This chick’s writing will keep you up at night, but in like a GOOD, i-didnt-know-i-needed-this-until-now kinda way. Aside from being brilliant, she’s also kind and smart and has helped me get through some of the craziest stuff in my life with her beautiful gifsets, amazing fics, and always rewarding conversation. So much so that I hereby forgive her for hurting me with beautiful Klonnie AUs. (You’re welcome bish)

Additionally, there’s so many more people who fill the tag, who review and reblog fics, who’re part of this classy little ship, and even though I don’t talk to all of you regularly I want you to know I love seeing y’all on my dash, and your artwork and contributions and support helps keep this fandom going. @capesandlace @godiva-duchess @prairienina @aprilgeorge365 @ofdragonsanddreams16 @gray-jedi-scavenger-rey @lilouklonnie @danya1980 @ishipwhateverthefuckiwantto @fortheloveofklonnie @tehzo @bellavida0213

Each and every one of you are responsible for creating a lovely little community in which I’ve felt more inspired, more creative, more welcomed and supported than any other fandom community I’ve been in. Y’all seriously rock, and I can’t wait to keep rocking with this fam <3 Viva la us my loves!

a list of me talking about stuff that happened in supergirl 309 – by me

  • previously on– wait, no. nevermind.
    • first off: so the crossover never happened.
      • on the one hand, GOOD. on the other hand, jesus h r u shitting me. it’s literally the next day, and i had to sit through god damn nazis for nothing. 
    • second: this show has always had structural issues when it comes to switching between kara and supergirl, but throwing sam and reign into the mix clearly broke their brains. 
      • someone was off burning symbols in the grass at the future home of the new l-corp research facility at the exact time sam was yelling at germans and picking up ruby and buying cookies and rushing to kara’s christmas party. idk who, but it wasn’t sam.
      • it broke their brains so much they accidentally implied james and lena were off to bone.
        • SUPERGIRL’S ABOUT TO GET HER ASS– wait, where are those two off to???
      • “if that’s true, where have you been?” NOT EVEN KARA UNDERSTANDS WHERE SAM CAME FROM OR WHAT’S GOING ON.
  • this episode had a lot of things i enjoyed a lot, but it was a hot fucking mess. oh well.
  • but speaking of hot messes.
    • so, not to be a callous dick who thinks there’s an expiration date on grief, but i’m officially bored of kara’s sadness. if they refuse to make explicit that this really is about something bigger, if it really is just about kara having loved him, then i’m going to have to start judging that sadness against the reality of that relationship. she didn’t even like him, and no stories about all you can eat ribs and that one time they got drunk is going to make me forget that. the fact that they have to make up a second happy memory is REALLY FREAKING TELLING. and god, it’s such a waste. kara has so much to genuinely be sad about, and this is what they’re fixating on? she’s so heartbroken over this one jerk that she thinks she can ~*never love be human again*~??? holy cow.
    • i know we like to make fun of buffy now, because it’s cool to hate everything joss whedon ever did, but ‘high school = hell’ actually feels more nuanced than ‘heartbreak = my humanity is dead’ right now.
    • i can’t believe alex told her to be alien, to stop being human, in a moment of such unsubtle writing i felt the hammer leap out of my tv and smash my little toe. because if this really is about mon-el, then i am honestly dreading what’s going to finally remind kara she really truly can love be a human again.
      • didn’t nazi kara do that already last week?!?
      • please god don’t let kara sleep with mon-el in the current timeline. please just let her realise he’s happy and let him go off with his dork of a wife.
  • oh well.
    • sorry, everyone who headcanons the danvers as jewish.
    • delightful things that happened:
      • none for mon-el and mrs mon-el.
      • lena sticks to scotch like the queen that she is.
        • i assume she’s drinking away the need to question who the fuck mr j'onzz is.
      • j’onn loves hall and oates and empire strikes back, and is honestly the perfect danvers sisters’ father in just about every way.
      • kara’s apartment continues to expand in ways that defy physics and logic, and she now has a pantry where her bathroom was a couple of weeks ago.
      • “aw, crone buddies.”
      • sam’s a disaster, but we’ll get to that later.
      • alex is bonding with her future adopted daughter, which we’ll also get to probably like by next episode since they’re clearly rushing the heck towards that being a requirement.
        • “i work with supergirl sometimes,” announces the woman who is the most paranoid secret keeper on the planet to a 12 year old who clearly has a blabber mouth???????
      • first, sam and lena and the no life pity party.
      • second, kara, remember when you thought you had chemistry with james? you should sit quietly in the corner now.
      • third, lena would kill them both except then she wouldn’t have any friends.
        • she’s just going to have some more scotch.
        • even though she only met kara like three seconds ago.
      • and then i was going to cry because somehow kara still thinks of her life as being blessed even if her supposed reliance on sam and lena never really actually happened ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    • except it totally is all about lena in my heart and my pants and also in james’ pants.
      • look. LOOK. we’re all just going to have to deal with the fact that i love this okay.
      • she pulled at his tie!
      • and then had the nerve to be embarrassed that she kissed him!
      • and then he fumbled their glasses onto a tray!
      • i loved this okay!
      • and if two women got exactly the same treatment as these two have, heck HALF THE LAST WEEKS OF THEM CRANKILY INTERACTING WITH BANTER, you’d all be screaming queerbaiting but also writing a million fics, so miss me with this ~THIS IS OUT OF NOWHERE~ claptrap, i live on tumblr, i know what you all ship.
      • ‘BUT JAMES IS A MISOGYNIST!!1!’ okay, my racist friends.
    • ‘a totally random symbol? on my random piece of property? it’s all over the city? shut up that’s irrelevant, IT’S CLEARLY ABOUT ME.’
    • “you’ve got feelings?” jimmyyyyyyy.
    • speaking of, BANTER!
      • “don’t worry, i’ll protect you.”
      • “hey, so we’re alive.” “yeah, well thank god i was here.”
      • “it’s just my quarterly assassination attempt.”
  • catco office: the scene of yet another public shirt rip, news at 11
    • sam’s worse at keeping her secret than kara.
    • i also don’t really get what her deal is.
    • so she doesn’t remember her trip to burning man, and then the next day she’s just completely fitted out with a full blown role play suit that she’s wandering around wearing but not noticing in anticipation of? the problem with giving your villain a fully developed existence is that it makes people wonder how the fuck spontaneous villainy actually works.
    • and then there’s the actual villainy itself.
      • the mark thing is arbitrary but old testament, fine.
      • but then she attacks, in order, drug dealers, morgan edge, and supergirl. one of these things is not like the other, fetish mask. e x p l a i n.
        • drug dealers: clearly bad.
        • morgan edge: tried to kill lena.
            • lena: the fuck, girl?
            • also lena: i tried to kill him last time you saw me.
        • supergirl: ??????
          • it’s possible chad lowe explained, but ugh. i can’t with him and so i might have missed it.
    • “what we know about this kryptonian is she’s a pretender.” oops, nope. bring on the suffering.
    • also, i think you set your workplace a little bit on fire there, kara.
    • (it turns out i’ve been pronouncing hubris wrong my entire life!)
  • that final scene was bad ass
    • and the time out for hilarity was one of the best fights they’ve ever shot
      • but the random time out for hilarity totally threw me
        • but it was genuinely hilarious
          • and totally threw me
            • so much so
              • i didn’t realise
                • we
                  • were
                    • ruNNING OUT OF TIME
                      • seriously, that fight scene went for 5 full minutes.
    • don’t be a cold alien, pals.
    • she’ll be okay, the lady from the literal future said so.
  • SEE YOU IN 2018!
malec fic rec

 hello, once again lovelies! i’ve decided to do another malec fic rec! i had fun doing the last one. so i decided to make another one! 

something there that wasn’t there before . (wip) by toastbabeis  

summary: Beauty and the Beast!Malec AU

Alec is raised in an abusive household, causing a coldness to develop in his soul as he grows; a coldness far too similar to his fathers. A witch preys upon that weakness and gives him a chance to prove himself. But Alec fails, and is cursed to a life in the shadows, every move made to remind him that he is turning into the man he once feared.

Magnus lives with his mother in a small, countryside village in France. Made an outcast by simply having an education, he longs for a life outside the confines of ignorant minds. When his mother is captured by a beast in a weathered castle, Magnus gives his freedom for her safety.

A spell curses one, and freedom curses the other. Will they be able to get past their own troubles and find love?

like the dawn (you broke the dark) . (completed)  
by theonetruenorth

summary: This isn’t happening.

Alec watches, dumbstruck, as the peacekeepers pull Max from the crowd. The little boy is too frozen in shock to move. It’s his first reaping, the odds were in his favor, he’s not the one who was supposed to be picked.

This. Isn’t. Happening.

it’s a yes from me . (completed)
by ketz

summary: Reclusive singer Alec Lightwood has been taking some time away from the spotlight for a few years now. He has lost his inspiration, his reason to keep making music.

That is, until his manager, Luke Garroway, asks him to enter the panel of the ridiculous singing competition The Angel’s Voice. Alec only says yes because that means keeping an eye on Clary and Simon. He hates those fixed, degrading TV shows with a burning passion. Hopefully, Alec figures, he’ll get some inspiration back watching new comers try their luck on TV. Some of them are bound to be good.

It isn’t until Magnus Bane walks on stage, however, that Alec realizes just how right he is.

eyes on me . (completed) by clockworkswan

summary: When a new same-sex dancing rule gets people talking, Magnus Bane decides to take the jump from Latin to Ballroom in order to prove that change is a good thing. Looking for a new challenge, he’s determined to win the Ballroom Championships and be crowned victorious in the first same-sex partnership.Now all he needs is the right shoes, the right music, and the right partner.


Alec is well on his way to securing another victory for his parents’ prestigious dance school, yet a new face, and surprising feelings, might change that. When Magnus turns up, he sweeps more than dancing traditions off their feet.

As the competition rounds heat up, and dreams hang in the balance, can the pair prove themselves to a worldwide audience of fellow dreamers, critics and cynics?

so bright . (completed)
by lemonoclefox

summary:  “You want me,” Magnus says, “to pretend to be your boyfriend.”
He sounds wholly unimpressed, and Alec has a moment of panic when he hears it out loud.
“Yes,” he says. “Temporarily.”
“You want me to fake date you,” Magnus says flatly. It’s not even a question, but more a way of really driving the point home about how dumb the idea is.
“Pretty much.”.
Magnus narrows his eyes.
“You do realize that this never works out well in movies, right?” he says. “Ever.”
Alec feels a distinct sense of embarrassment creep up now.
“Look, I―”

Alec has come out, but that doesn’t stop his parents from their continuous attempts to set him up with a nice shadowhunter girl. So, what better way to finally get them off his back, than to say he has a boyfriend? Problem solved. Except they now apparently want to meet this guy, who doesn’t exist. Thankfully, Magnus Bane – who encouraged Alec to come out in the first place, and whose silent crush on Alec is just as bad as Alec’s crush on him – is more than happy to help. Even if the night doesn’t end up going entirely as planned.

what’s it gonna be . (completed)
by lemonoclefox

summary: Fairchild’s bakery is a second home to not just Magnus, but also to most of his found-family. As a pastry chef, he works long hours and takes great pride in his craft – so much so that he has little time or attention for much else. Least of all romance. After plenty of experience with heartbreak and disappointment, he has come to expect the worst from anything in that department, and the arrival of the wealthy Lightwoods in the neighborhood isn’t about to change that. Especially not when their eldest son might just be the most insufferable prick Magnus has ever met, no matter what anyone else has to say about the guy.

(aka the Pride & Prejudice/bakery AU no one asked for)

ship of dreams  . (wip) by magicandarchery and maleciseverything 

summary: The Alicante was called ‘unsinkable’ and the 'Ship of Dreams’; her maiden voyage would be taking many to a new life. For Magnus Bane it would be taking him back home, where he could start over again. For Alec Lightwood it would be taking him home in chains to a life his parents had meticulously planned for him. As the journey wore on they would find that their dreams for the future would change and as tragedy strikes they have to fight to survive to make these dreams a reality.

Or: The Titanic AU that no one but Lion bribed asked us to write

high expectations . (completed)  by  lecrit 

summary: Magnus has had a long day.

It was supposed to be a relaxing, lazy day in. He had planned on taking a long bath while listening to King Freddie and let the essential oils unwind the tension from his shoulders. Maybe he would have spiked up the whole thing with one of his homemade martinis.

Or the one where Magnus learns he shouldn’t make plans, Alec gets high on a potion, and the Chairman is sassy.

Part 4 of the Drunk Alec series.

expecto patronum . (completed)  by gaydemonium

summary: Alec is having trouble casting his Patronus so Magnus helps him out.

gardener for hire . (completed) by gaydemonium

summary: Magnus needs a landscaper to help with his lawn. Alec isn’t who he expects.

[Based on everything Matt said during his livechat]

the last thing i expected . (completed) by kouriarashi 

summary:  On every warlock’s 25th birthday, there’s a ritual to choose their perfect match. Normally it isn’t a big deal, but for Magnus Bane - the son of Asmodeus, an Underworld crime lord - it’s the party of the century. Everyone is more than a little surprised when Magnus’ match turns out to be the bartender, Alec … who’s actually an undercover police officer. Alec’s bosses want him to play along to get close to the organization, but Alec isn’t sure he can mislead the man who’s apparently his soulmate…

today your barista is… . (completed) by baneandgone 

summary: alec works in a coffeeshop. one day jace hijacks the chalkboard out front

(aka one of those 'today your barista is’ sign aus)

4x04 Personal Highlights

So I know that there has been a lot of negativity surrounding this past episode, but I would like to point out that it was far from being all bad and I would say it was a hell of a lot better than episode four from LAST season (aka. my least favourite episode of this show, ever) there was actually some good shit buried in this episode that I would like to address.

Never too much positivity, right fam?

Okay, I’ll get to it.

1. “Bellamy should be back by now.”

I mean, it’s self-explanatory. Even the C/exa queen is writing us some Bellarke shit .. hmm, I wonder why? Maybe cause she has to? Maybe cause Bellarke is becoming canon? Huh, weird.

2. Monty being a total babe and trying to comfort Clarke

It only serves to make the absence of his name on The List that much more painful, but I love seeing Monty trying to cheer Clarke up. He’s such a beacon of light. @the-ships-to-rule-them-all and @abazethe100 talked on their podcast about how its not just Monty’s brain and skills that make him invaluable, but who he is at his core - a source of optimism and support. He holds people together. I thought it was worth mentioning because @theskyboxpodcast is always good, but I especially loved that bit.

3. Devon’s acting

The writers truly could not have picked a better actor to play Jasper. He kills it, over and over and over again. Devon is the perfect mix of humour and tragedy that makes Jasper so heartbreaking and unique. He brings life to this character in a way that few actors could. That scene in the rain perfectly demonstrates this.

(UNRELATED: I’d love to see how Jaha was managing out on that lake when he heard about the acid fog. The possibilities are never-endingly humourous.)

4. Kane calling out Octavia

This scene was soooo validating because its the first time that Octavia’s actions have TRULY been called out. And it wasn’t just a brief call-out, it was an entire lengthy scene dedicated to why Octavia’s actions are NOT being supported by the narrative and are NOT right or honourable. 

“A warrior knows when not to kill. Lincoln taught you that. You seem to have forgotten.”


And to those of you who were screaming about Octavia never dealing with the consequences of her actions after … what? 4x02? YOU COULDN’T WAIT TWO EPISODES??? WHY DO YOU JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS WHY DO YOU TORTURE YOURSELVES? Short rant concluded. This was a top-knotch scene. 


She is so gorgeous and her voice is so soothing. She makes every episode better just be existing.



7. Jackson being a total babe and helping out Raven this episode/showing compassion and concern

So I’ve seen people shipping it and I am … oddly, not opposed??? I mean, he’s sweet and that banter was nice and he’s a doctor which means he’s probs smart and also can help her out with her pain (kinda) and it will never happen but I CAN DREAM OKAY? 

Also, Jackson is Jackson’s only name. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules. You will never hear me referring to Jackson by any other name. #dealwithit

8. “Save us all” sounds like “keep us all clean” in Trigadesleng because apparently Grounders know their priorities

I guess this explains why L.exa had that deep conditioned shit last season while Clarke was progressing through her slow but steady evolution into a dirty mop

9. “I’ve never met a line I wouldn’t cross.”

Richard you get the best lines. And you slay them every time.


I’M SO EXCITED. Lindsey and Richard are both a thrill to watch and they’re both so sassy and their history is just … WOW. They haven’t had many scenes together ever since that KILLER scene in the dropship where we learned Murphy’s backstory which is a total crime because THEIR CHEMISTRY SERIOUSLY FLIES THROUGH THE ROOF.

I do think Murphy was trying to get on Raven’s good side when he grabbed her and helped her to safety and it was definitely for his personal motives, but I do also believe that a large part of him wanted to do it as an attempt to make up for fucking up her life so bad as well. It’s such an interesting dynamic to watch.

Just want to clarify that I don’t ship it because … y’all he literally shot her and paralyzed her why do you do this?? But I definitely want to see more of them on my TV screen

11. Dad!Kane cupping his son’s face

Need I say more?

12. “Warriors don’t reveal their secrets.”


13. Ice Nation is SO much more interesting than Trikru


14. “Remember that time we welded your dad’s furniture to the ceiling? Now THAT was a prank.”



15. “You’re not God, Clarke. You don’t get to decide who lives and dies.”

Hmm … that’s an interesting line. Almost like it might be … I don’t know … A major theme of the show or something?

Also A++ delivery Devon. Kudos.

16. This show is SO GOOD with moral dilemmas

They truly do bring their A-Game every season. The List is just one example of these so-called moral dilemmas. There truly is no right choice. Clarke was pragmatic, everything she did made SENSE. But was it moral? Was it humane? That’s another story, and it’s one these writers are not afraid to tell.

17. Monty and Clarke’s interactions are all so on point

“You’re the one going too far and using the same old justification: it’s all for my people.”


Monty is spilling the tea this episode and while I understand Clarke’s mindset and sympathize with her for dealing with the pressure on her shoulders, everything that Monty said in this scene was absolutely 100% true, and it’s going to come into play in Clarke’s character arc this season, I am sure.

18. Raven’s struggle with her leg is so real

Kim perfectly captured the struggles that Raven has to deal with and how her leg, while limits her physical ability, certainly does not limit her determination, her skill, and her brain. 

19. “What if the fight is all we are? We torture, kill, betray. We pretend we’re more than that just to make ourselves feel better, but it’s a lie.”

I love this line so much. This episode encapsulates so many themes and big ideas of the show (and it grapples with morality in hugeeeee ways) and I’m loving it.

20. “You’re not a prisoner, Luna. You have a choice.”

Raven putting her gun down and saying this to Luna is SO important, especially when you think about how Clarke tried to force the flame on her in 3x14. Free will was a major theme last year and I’m glad to see it paying off now.

21. Jaha swooping in and stealing that crowd

Listen. I know that there are many conflicted opinions on Jaha and I know that lot of people hate him. But I have never been more intrigued. His story this season is sooo interesting. I have no idea what to expect from him. I feel as though he is so disconnected from the other characters at this point in the narrative that he’s a complete wild card. Do I trust him or not? Should I? What are his motives? What knowledge does he have that the other characters don’t?

He’s so fascinating to me in that he is completely unpredictable. His story this season could break off in just about any direction. 

This scene was really fun to watch. Clearly, Jaha’s years of being a Chancellor comes in handy with a crowd. He knows what to do, what to say, to sway them. It reminds me of Bellamy, in a way, actually. Say what you will about Jaha, but he has a way with words and he knows how to inspire people. I can’t wait to see how this goes. 

(I totally think that lottery is bullshit and I think that Jaha realizes this, but he’s manipulating the crowd. We’ll see how this blows up in our faces later.)

“The people need to feel like they have a say in their fate.”

Another interesting line that I enjoyed. Just wanted to point it out.

22. “It’s the only choice you gave yourself. If you think you have the best idea, you have to convince people, not lie to them. Or lock them up.”

So choices and free will and truth and morality are all big focusses of this episode. People seem to overlook how much great thematic stuff is in 4x04 but there’s a lot and it’s great.

23. Becca’s lab is bomb AF


25. “Take me home.” 


anonymous asked:

You've probably been asked this but what do you think about people getting more impatient for the promised LGBT character? I personally really trust M&K as writers, especially Miles, that man's writing on RvB was great. They're aware of their weak points. And I did hear that many relationships were pre-planned. I get really spooked seeing the louder part of the minority talk about it bc of the agression. Although I'm very glad they're easing into it with those two bamboo bois in V5E1.

I am incredibly aware of the whole issue. I am bi myself. As a writer I have educated myself on that topic, on how to write representation, toxic tropes and how to avoid them. I have both written representation and critically reviewed books that have attempted to write representation. 

Just to let you know that I know what I am talking about here. 

Representation is incredibly important. I know why it’s important. As for the anger and aggression… I completely understand it but I don’t like it. 

I know that it’s frustrating because we have been screwed over so many times. Characters who are queer in the books are suddenly straight in the movie. Two characters who do have chemistry and would totally end up together if they weren’t of the same gender never ever will be dating, just because they can’t make them gay, be it because they don’t want to or because the network won’t let them. A romance between two women doesn’t get to be anything but subtext because the network didn’t let the writers do a queer romance, but the straight ships all get to make out and be romantic with each other.

People always say “I want it to happen if it fits, if they have chemistry, it shouldn’t matter if they are gay or bi or straight or whatever”, but the truly heartbreaking thing is that this never ever happens. Two characters of the same gender ending up together always is a conscious choice. A queer couple never happens just because those characters happened to have chemistry. 

It does matter, it always does. 

And when a queer ship happens they are often badly written. Straight ships get all the complicated drama and queer characters only get the issues that come with being queer. Don’t get me wrong, it’s important to deal with them, it’s important not to ignore them - but it’s also important to have a balance, to have a queer romance that struggles with all the things straight people struggle with and not just the fact that they are queer. It feels like being reduced to that part of yourself, but each one of us is a person and we are all more than just the gay one or the bi one or the ace one. 

We get chemistry between characters that will never ever be together. We get romances that only become canon because the writers confirm it later. We get characters who get together and immediately die. We get tropes and badly written romances, written by straight people who have probably never really talked to a queer person. We get reduced to being queer. 

So yes, I understand the anger. When so many shows have screwed you over it’s hard to trust anyone anymore. 

But I also trust the writers and I think they get a lot of that anger that is caused by society as a whole and not them specifically. That doesn’t excuse anything but it’s important to know. 

The thing that irks me is that if they had never promised representation they wouldn’t get so much backlash. It would just be another show with straight characters which eventually surprises when they go with a well written queer romance. It implies that saying they would do queer romance was a bad thing but it wasn’t, because them saying “Yes, we want to do representation, it will come” made me feel seen, made me feel included. 

I really don’t think they would keep promising representation if they didn’t intend on delivering it eventually. I don’t think they would keep teasing Bumblebee if they didn’t intend on at least doing a big queer romance between main characters. 

Each time they said they would do representation they said that it would take time. So no one can say that we have been baited for too long. They said they’d do it because they were asked if they would. Queer fans asked them if the show would have queer characters and truthfully they said “Yes, we see you, but it will take some time”. So I don’t think they did anything wrong. 

What irks me about the backlash they get is that it hits the wrong people. That sort of aggression from people who demand representation hitting people who want to do representation but don’t do it right in people’s eyes kinda hurts because in this case it’s unjustified and it might just scare off other people who also want to write representation. And that’s the last thing we want. 

No, we don’t have to accept every shitty queer character we get if they’re badly written, but we also don’t have to jump at everyone who does a minor mistake or maybe even no mistake at all. 

I mean it’s pretty clear they have baited Bumblebee a lot and if they don’t do a queer relationship between two main characters I will be so mad and the first one to point out what a shitty move that is. I will be angry. I will feel betrayed. But so far they haven’t given me any reason to believe that they won’t do that. And as long as they don’t fuck up and genuinely try I will defend them. 

Thoughts on Crisis on Earth X

This year’s crossover event once again hit the pause button on all major plot lines from the CW Arrow universe and welcomed doppelgangers from Earth X. It took me a little while to get into this crossover, but midway through the Arrow episode I was hooked and couldn’t wait for the 2 hour finale Tuesday night. Here are some of my highlights of what I liked vs. didn’t like. 

Beware of spoilers….


  • I’m ALWAYS up for a good team up, especially when it is with characters that are not usually on each other shows. (Barry and Kara are usually my favorite.) This crossover had the most heroes we have seen on screen at the same time thus far, and probably the most that has been on the waverider. It was a nice treat to see them all interact. 
  • Alternate versions: I really enjoyed seeing a completely different take on some characters. Really happy that was Winn was incorporated in part of the 2nd half. It was crazy to see him as a general giving out all of the orders and heartbreaking at the same time to hear Alex try to reason with him. Good to see Wentworth Miller back as Leonard Snart/Captain Cold again. He played a totally different side to his character and I am happy he is sticking around for a bit. His new banter with Mick was fantastic and I love how Barry impersonated our Snart and Earth X’s looked very concerned. Supergirl and Arrow was a ship I never even considered, but now don’t know why I didn’t think of it. Their dynamic was great and I loved seeing Melissa and Stephen get some more scenes together. I was a little sad for them in the end…don’t worry only a little.
  • Welcoming back old faces: Just as we welcomed back Wentworth Miller, Colin Donnell reprised his role as Tommy Merlyn, but this time from Earth X wearing the Prometheus suit. For me, this is where the episode got me. I love how they keep finding ways to bring Tommy back and his acting was superb. I seriously thought he wasn’t happy on Earth X. Too bad his time on screen was so short. (I guess I’ll have to catch up on Chicago Med.) Also liked the return of the Reverse Flash (as much as I’m upset with his ending). I really love how we couldn’t also have an evil Nazi Barry, so they brought back Eboard Thawne, yes our Thawne not a doppelganger. As much as I’m not a fan of the character I did like seeing Tom Cavanagh in the role once again.  
  • The Humor: Yes, all four shows have great action sequences, but in my opinion, they are nothing without their humor. We seem to get some of the best lines when our shows team up. Some of my personal favorites had to be when Supergirl and the Flash immediately get on site and are waiting for Green Arrow. Oliver drives in on his motorcycle reminding them he doesn’t have super-speed. Also loved Barry’s reaction to seeing Oliver in a suit. Standing next to him, Barry looked like a kid going to prom. But my favorite moment was Supergirl telling Reverse Flash that her cousin would come and who saves her, but Ray. Yet another great nod to Brandon Routh as Superman in Superman Returns. (I also liked the Man of Steel comment by Nate.) 

Not a Fan of:

  • I have to address this right away…Victor Garber. NO! It’s still….NO…they couldn’t have. It just doesn’t seem real! I know they’ve been trying to find a way to break up Firestorm that way Dr. Stein could be at home with his family (and newborn grandson), and I know Victor Garber was looking to leave the show, but SERIOUSLY did he have to go like this???? He couldn’t just simply drink the stuff Cisco and Harry made and let it happen. I know Jax still wanted powers (and loved yet another allusion to Spiderman), but Stein DID NOT HAVE TO DIE!!! And the death. Phew! I know it was later when I was watching, but that last conversation between Jax and Stein had me blubbering. I don’t like it and will be in denial until long after the midseason finale of Legends airs. 
  • Justice for the Supergirl cast: I LOVE that Alex was in on the adventure this time around, but I still think the Supergirl cast gets gypped every time. Yes, Winn was involved, and James for a hot second as a version of Guardian on Earth X. On the Supergirl episode that kicks off the crossover, we do see all of them (including newly returned Mon El) at the DEO, but it was soooo short. Supergirl is a great show and I know it’s following is getting bigger and bigger. For this year’s crossover they knew the show would be involved. I just wish more of the cast would have been along for the ride.
  • Which leads me to one MAJOR complaint. (Well definitely a major one from me.) NO CISCO AND WINN AGAIN!! We deserve this and it would have been THE PERFECT TIME! But nope. It didn’t happen again! It’s going to sound horrible, but I was kind of hopeful when Cisco was in that random coma. Maybe Kara would have to call Winn over. (Okay I’m grasping at straws, but come on!) I don’t know if the writers will ever let us have this!!! 
  • The loose end of who that waitress girl at the wedding was that talking long and awkwardly to Barry. If you’ve seen my other post you know my suspicion of her being Iris and Barry’s kid (very Back to the Future style), but she was never mentioned again. Luckily some people have mentioned it looks like she’ll be brought back up in a later episode. Fingers crossed!


Those are just a few of my major thoughts on the Crisis on Earth X crossover event. Like I said, I really did enjoy it. It felt very cinematic and I liked how not every episode was dedicated to one specific show like last time. It flowed from one hour to the next, even without a “previously on..” The beginning was pretty cool too. I’m on the search for the music. I can’t wait what all the shows have in store for us next week!

Weekly Voltron Fic Recs #20

Rules: You can find past rec lists here. This is stuff I like, and I have a huge bias toward Lance, hurt/comfort, and general fluff, in that order. Gen unless otherwise noted. Please comment on the fics if you read and enjoy them!

I’m going to be busy this weekend with friend and family stuff, so I wanted to get this done tonight. I was going to try to make a separate list for the fics with spoilers, but there are just too many of them, so press J to skip this post if you haven’t finished Season 2 yet and don’t want to see major revelations about it.

This is a very long list. It’s been almost two weeks since the last one, and there’s been an explosion of fics with the new season. 

Here Stands a Man by awkwardCerberus
Words: 2,568 (WIP 1 / 4)
Author’s Summary: Following his disappearance after defeating Zarkon, Shiro is found floating through space and picked up by a Galran transport delivering a hold full of prisoners to a construction colony. Back at the Castle, the remains of Team Voltron are doing whatever they can to get Shiro back and trying hard not to fall apart in the process.
My Comments: Heartwrenching Post S2 fic where Shiro gets pulled back into basically his worst nighmare once again. Can’t wait for him to get rescued, please.

A Couple of Ticks by easternCriminal
Words: 1,533 (WIP 1/?)
Author’s Summary: After an unaccounted for variable does their best to assist Voltron during their final battle with Zarkon, Hunk and Lance wake up in the Galaxy Garrison… a few months before Shiro crash landed back on Earth.
My Comments: I am a sucker for time-travel AUs where a character comes back with knowledge of the future and tries to change the past. Plus this is my two faves, so you can understand why I’m excited about it. And they have a psychic connection, which is also fun. I’m really looking forward to more.

pull out your heart by valkyriered
Words: 1,965
Author’s Summary: After two weeks aboard a Galra ship, Shiro is rescued by his team.
My Comments: Really nice hurt/comfort focused on Shiro and Allura. I want Shiro to get all the hugs, please.

Spar Session by theoncomingwolf
Words: 3,025
Author’s Summary: In which Allura takes the training bot’s place as sparring opponent for the day. Set after s2, all paladins present.
My Comments: Really fun action fic in which Allura is a badass, but everyone gets a moment. It’s cool to see her leadership qualities come out and her reflections on the paladins’ skills.

Pause and Wait by the_authors_exploits
Words: 1,319
Author’s Summary: Keith and Shiro are stranded for the night, and Keith watches over Shiro while he gets some much needed rest
My Comments: Season 2 was great, but it sure seemed to skip over a lot of stuff we would have liked to see. This is a nice missing moment from Episode 1.

For Your Actions are Mine by wolfsan11
Words: 1,368
Author’s Summary: The Red Lion has awaited her Paladin for years, but the figure who fights to reach her is neither what she expects nor wants. Yet, after her imprisonment, perhaps this little one is simply what she needs.
My Comments: FANTASTIC Red pov. I love this view of her and her view of Keith. Lovely.

Insomnia by GriffinRose
Words: 15,278
Author’s Summary: They reunite after the Wormhole Incident all in one piece. Mostly. But some scars can’t be seen. Keith can’t sleep, no matter how hard he tries. Luckily he’s got the best team/family ever who are not about to let this go. No, seriously, they won’t let it go.
My Comments: Absolutely wonderful, subtle hurt/comfort and teamy goodness. What was really wrong and how to fix it was obvious to me early on, but it was fun to watch the team slowly figure it out.

Bromances in Space by ptw30
Words: 2,540 (WIP 4/?)
Author’s Summary: Various drabbles for Voltron: Legendary Defender - mainly Keith and Shiro Story One: Hug It Out (Episode Nine - The Belly of Weblum)
Story Two: Castle in the Sky (after Episode Thirteen - Blackout)
Story Three: How Shiro Became a Dad (Domestic AU)
Story Four: Dad Duties (Domestic AU)
My Comments: Each chapter is a separate story. The first two have S2 spoilers, but the others are just fluff. They’re all excellent.

Okay I can’t just go to bed with Season 2 ending like that I mean really… by Rangergirl3 for 4_angsty_zukos, PrincessMnMz, Zenthisoror
Words: 3,590
Author’s Summary: Literally what I thought after binge watching the incredible, fantastic, and all around phenomenal S2.Goes without saying: Spoiler Alert for VLD Season 2 (especially the finale) Hell of a cliffhanger, and I couldn’t rest without writing something for it, because it’s going to be AWHILE before we know what happens. So, here you all are. I had to write this for myself because otherwise, I wasn’t getting to sleep. :-)
My Comments: What it says! I love reading all these fics and seeing the various ideas people have for what that Big Dumb Cliffhanger meant. No two so far that I’ve seen have been alike.

But a Scratch by manunulat
Words: 1,052
Author’s Summary: This is a brief vignette set after s2ep2. Some things can’t be fixed by healing pods.
My Comments: Would you like some Hunk and Lance being funny, loving bros, with just a touch of angst? I always like it. I like this one, too.

for every bird there is a stone by lacking
Words: 15,954 (4/?)
Author’s Summary: Shiro walks away from his confrontation with Haggar injured and shaken. After falling through the corrupted wormhole and finding himself stranded alongside Keith on a solitary planet, Shiro begins doubting his bond with the black lion and his place among the other paladins. As the team is reunited and his health continues to decline, Shiro is forced to confront parts of himself he thought were long buried, and everyone is left questioning just how far he’s willing to go in order to survive.
My Comments: This is excellent. Fantastic characterization and interaction, especially for Shiro and Keith. We can always use more post-wormhole fics when they’re this good.

your sacred stars won’t be guiding you by contagionangel
Words: 3,233
Author’s Summary: In one reality, a major change in long-past history means that, among other things, Shiro never crash-lands on Earth. Hunk still gets attached to the people he’ll end up going to space with. A story of friendship, alien coverup conspiracies, and starting to grow courage without noticing.
My Comments: I ADORE this. I love the Garrison Trio Plus, and all the ways things change and don’t change with their closer, more involved friendship here. And Hunk’s POV is perfect. I really want more, and the author has promised there will be some more. Like, a lot more, eventually. I am waiting with open hands.

The Core of Him by nightwalker for MusicalLuna
Words: 2,072
Author’s Summary: Shiro wasn’t afraid of doing what the Olkari king had done – he knew he’d choke on the words if he even tried.
My Comments: Absolutely amazing Shiro character study, his view of the team and how important they are and what they mean to him. The other paladins are all adorable and well-characterized too, of course. There were a couple of lines in here that made me breathless with their vivid imagery and strong emotion.

White Hallways by Fernandidilly_yo
Words: 3,159
Author’s Summary: (Set right after season 2 episode 13) Keith’s reaction to finding that the black lion it empty, and Shiro is gone.
My Comments: Utterly heartbreaking, but this also feels so necessary. Lance is a good kid.

Entanglement by story_monger
Words: 1,910
Author’s Summary: Pidge has a major revelation about the castle ship’s technology and absolutely has to tell someone about it. In which Hunk and Pidge yell at one another about quantum entanglement and Lance simultaneously is confused by and loves his uber nerdy friends.
My Comments: ADORABLE. The Garrison Trio is so, so good, in both happiness and grief.

Stating the Obvious by nightwalker
Words: 1,947
Author’s Summary: It occurred to Keith like a punch to the gut that they were talking about Allura now, Lance was going to try to talk about this.
My Comments: Another scene I really wanted in the show and didn’t get. Lance is a good kid.

Between by Silverkleptofox
Words: 2,086
Author’s Summary: Between the biggest revelation of his life and his whole world changing, there is no time for Keith to rest and recover. His teammates make sure he does anyway. Tag to Season 2 Episode 8.
My Comments: Almost unnecessarily detailed hurt/comfort based on canon injuries, haha. I love it.

Casserole by genericfanatic
Words: 1,922
Author’s Summary: After Shiro “dies” on the Kerberos mission, Keith is all alone. Some days are harder than others.
My Comments: This author really excels at sharp, almost harsh depictions of pain and grief that are so realistic that you can feel it yourself. So good.

Nought but Grief and Pain (for Promis’d Joy) by Hedgi
Words: 1,353
Author’s Summary: Keith has always been many things. Stupid has never been one of them. Impulsive, sure. Reckless, yes. Intense, quiet, alone—check, check, check. But not stupid. What’s the point in looking for another way, another plan, when all they need is another person on board Zarkon’s ship? Introspection reaction to “The Best laid Plans”
My Comments: Really painful Keith POV on a pivotal moment in the season. I was glad it ended the way it did.

Basic Chemistry by 15Strawberries
Words: 1,211
Author’s Summary: Hunk has some down time in between battles. He tries to make the most of it.
My Comments: The PERFECT Hunk. This is exactly how I see him. Adorable and beautiful.

Water Vaper and Earthquakes by boredomsMuse
Words:  3,445
Author’s Summary: Hunk is generally a chill guy, well not in the matter that he’s never scared or anything but in the sense that Lance has only ever seen the guy angry like once. Until Pidge gets hurt during an ambush, and Lance is really glad this isn’t the first time he’s seen Hunk angry or things might just have been a lot worse for the paladins of Voltron.
My Comments: Really cool magic AU. I’m a big fan of berserker Hunk, and the sense of history with Lance is really fascinating. I would read a lot more of this concept.

Just What You Want by BossToaster (ChaoticReactions)
Words: 3,265 (WIP 2/5)
Author’s Summary: 5 times Shiro got hugged by the team.Written pre-Season 2 but I think we need it more now. Also, nominally takes place in the Spectrum verse, but that only matters in chapter five. Updates Saturday and Wednesday.
My Comments: Yes good. All the hugs for Shiro. Hunk and Pidge so far, and they were both perfect and adorable and genuine and sweet and made me super happy.

The Melting Milky Way by BossToaster (ChaoticReactions)
Words: 1,827
Author’s Summary: Shiro returns, but he has questions. How well did the team manage while he was gone? He doesn’t get the answer he wanted.
My Comments: Perfect Finale tag. Just read it. I don’t want to spoil it.

the currents you create by theoddoodisnude
Words: 18,501
Author’s Summary: Some days, he woke up even more tired than he’d been when he’d gone to sleep, and willing his body to go through the motions was just—tough. Like wading through thigh-high water or running on soft sand that gave under the soles of his feet.
My Comments: Here’s my obligatory Klance hurt/comfort for the week. I think there’s always one. Anyway, this one is very good. Very realistic depiction of depression, and I liked how supportive everyone was, and how hard Lance tried to deal with everything even when he just wanted to give up. Also some wonderful Hunk and Lance and team bonding in there.

Knowledge or Death (And Ignorance is Bliss) by squirenonny
Words: 2,189
Author’s Summary: Keith tells the rest of the team what he learned in the Trials of Marmora. [Season Two spoilers! Set between “The Blade of Marmora” and “The Belly of the Weblum”]
My Comments: PERFECT missing scene from S2 that we really should have gotten, omg. Unless disproven later by canon, this is how it went for me. Headcanon accepted, stamped, cosigned, and engraved in stone.

Lion’s Call by Wolfie_Dragon
Words: 2,948
Author’s Summary: After nearly getting killed during battle, Lance is confined to a healing pod. However, he seems to disagree with the severity of the situation, especially when he senses a cry of pain. And it’s up to Keith to get him back to the infirmary. Angst/Whump oneshot. Written for the Whumpaween exchange on tumblr.
My Comments: Aww, ouch. This is painful and sweet at the same time. Keith is exasperated, but he does his best.

Silence is Golden by VelkynKarma for BossToaster (ChaoticReactions)
Words: 10,291
Author’s Summary: It’s just a sore throat. It’s really not that big a deal. But the rest of team Voltron doesn’t really see it that way—and Shiro’s taking a day off whether he likes it or not.
My Comments: Aww, everyone tries so hard. What a good team. ::pats them::

Dark Necessities by BossToaster (ChaoticReactions) for VelkynKarma
Words: 9,564
Author’s Summary: Sometimes, the choices are easy. This is not one of those times. Shiro knew what he was agreeing to when he became their leader. It doesn’t make those calls easier.
My Comments: This was a rough read, but it was really well done. Being a leader is hard. I liked the way they talked it out at the end, even if nothing felt fully resolved. It can’t with things like this, sometimes.

Previously Recced Fics That Updated:

Mini Lions by earthstar
Where No One Goes by earthstar
One Week to Say Goodbye by squirenonny
Beautiful Minds by PotatoBender (really gorgeous worldbuilding this chap)
Aid by Haurvatat
Someplace Like Home by squirenonny
Coming Undone by Emerald_Ashes
Light Up the Dark by BajillionKittens
Love and Other Questions by squirenonny
He Sleeps in the Sky of Ice by jadencross (now complete! read read read!)
Engine Won’t Turn by yet_intrepid (now complete! READ READ READ!)
Trials Before the Dead by birdzilla (now complete! ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS)
The Final Act of Mercy by ptw30 (now complete!)
Parasite Knight by VelkynKarma (NOW COMPLETE)
Beast You’ve Made of Me by BossToaster (ChaoticReactions) (now complete)

proditeur  asked:


You send, I’ll Meta || Always Accepting 

I am writing this in the context of a Jegulus ship, as obviously I am of course a single ship blog now, for Jegulus. No but really, I have thoughts and a many of them so I shall take it bit by bit. 


It’s hard to imagine a Jegulus in school. Regulus is everything James doesn’t understand. Pureblood values, the exact opposite of Sirius in nature, but yet there’s something about him that’s intriguing. James is the brother stealer to Regulus, he’s the boy that came in and took his place. They don’t like one another, they don’t understand one another and yet seem to cross paths anyway. 

In order to make Jegulus as a ship happen in school you have to take them both away from others. It has to be secret, it has to be somewhere there’s nobody to perform for. It has to be something that’s theirs and private, otherwise you’re not going to get the real James or Regulus. You’re going to get what they think they need to be. You’re going to get pureblood snobbery and Gryffindor pride and not much else. James especially, is exceedingly good at public performance, he’s also pretty obtuse when it comes to human nature. He takes people as what they are, and it takes him maturing in order to look under the surface. 

James at first, wants to save Regulus. I don’t for one minute think this started altruistically on James’ part. He wants to be the one who influenced Regulus to make the right decision, wants to be Sirius’ hero in bringing his brother back to the fold. It’s the instinctive need to be a hero, to be the shining light that would at first bring James to Regulus. James’ stubbornness would be what kept them going, his refusal to give up once he had a goal in mind, and eventually would wear Regulus down enough to actually start to see snippets of the real him. 

He’d start to notice his sense of humour, the bits that slip through sometimes without Regulus even noticing. Maybe it’d been there all along, maybe James had just took it as snark because all he saw was a Slytherin. Maybe it’s James who changes and not Regulus. But either way, it’s there and it’s real and James can’t get enough of it. They have more in common than they think they did, they have Quidditch, they have humour, they have Sirius and they both have steadfast beliefs they’re unwilling to compromise on. Most of all, they have them. The secret of their friendship or whatever this is. 

Anything beyond would be slow to happen. Wouldn’t allow James to develop a gay crisis over a kiss as it doesn’t count. It’s secret. Their meetings are secret, their strange relationship is secret and as they never quite put a name to it, it doesn’t really matter what it is or what it means. James doesn’t ever have to acknowledge his attraction to a man, because the entirety of his relationship with Regulus exists solely in the ROR, where they meet maybe once or twice a week. Although he never does quite get round to bridging the gap between the two brothers. 

However their relationship develops in school. It is never going to have a happy ending. Regulus is always going to choose Voldemort, and James is always going to choose the light. As it gets closer to that time, as school ends and the war ramps up and James knows exactly where he’s going to go. He’d try once. He’d bring it up in a moment of desperation, needing to know once and for all which way Regulus is going to go. He’d never ask to be chosen, he wouldn’t try as hard as he should because he’s terrified of putting is all into it and having it fail. He’s terrified of what it would mean for Regulus not to choose him. 

School romance would only ever end in heartbreak, and a potential memory wipe for James. Which he’d want. Which he’d agree with. Because although he wants to remember loving Regulus, he can’t go into this fight knowing he’s fighting on the other side. School can only end in regret. 

First War 

Whether they had a thing in school or not, whether this is something James remembers or not (there are many possible Jegulus verses and stories, and many ways they can go), by the first war his reasonings have changed. James had always seen things in Black and White, Good and Evil, Slytherin and Gryffindor. He had wholeheartedly believed that Good would always win, that people would fight fair. He believed the light was going to provide victory because that was just the way it went. Light won over dark every time, that’s how it was supposed to be. Except, it isn’t like that. It’s a war they are most certainly losing. It’s a war in which James himself has escaped death and Voldemort himself multiple times. 

James doesn’t want glory in the midst of this war. He doesn’t want glory or heroism at a time his friends are dying left and right, in which his parents are dead, Remus is secretive, Peter acting strange and Sirius suspicious of everyone. He doesn’t recognise anything within the war, and although he keeps fighting, he doesn’t see it as good vs bad anymore. He doesn’t see the fallen bodies of death eaters, masks at the side of them and see a soulless being. He see’s people they went to school with. He see’s people they didn’t give much of a choice in choosing the dark, when they’d expected it of them all along. 

Finding Regulus again this time, wasn’t a way to seek out glory. It was a genuine offer of help, a genuine plea and a clever way to win the war. They share information, they talk far more than two people who had hated one another should ever talk. They spend time in a dreary muggle flat away from the violence of the world around them and it’s depressing, it’s awful and disgusting and yet somehow it’s better than being anywhere else. It’s an Island in the middle of a rough sea and soon sharing information becomes just an excuse to have something else, something more meaningful. It becomes an excuse just to see one another. 

Regulus doesn’t trust easily, has a survival instinct like no other and James can tell he doesn’t sleep. James doesn’t necessarily want to save Regulus in the way he used to feel about people, but he wants to be the reason Regulus feels safe. He wants to provide something, he wants to hold him, he wants to feel Regulus relax against him and know that he can do that, because James is there. He wants his trust and he wants to earn it. He wants so much more and is terrified and unsure that he won’t get to have it. 

Regulus and James during the war fall in love. They fall hard and fast and once they’re there, there’s no pulling back. James is a person who is all in, he wants what he wants and he won’t stop until he gets it. He can’t turn off his feelings, he can’t stop loving someone once he does and by the time the war is right there on their doorsteps, he’s done worrying about the correct people to love, or the correct gender. He lives for the couple of hours a week he gets with Regulus. 

Once again, this only happens because it’s secret. Because their relationship is conducted behind closed doors, between the two of them. The key to Jegulus I think, is that nobody else is involved. There is nobody watching or narrating their relationship, there are no outside parties or circumstances to interfere. They are two people who fall in love alone, in some sort of bubble they created with themselves and navigating the world beyond that, whilst a challenge, is one they embark on already firmly knowing how they feel for one another. They build a solid foundation because they build it alone. 

Jegulus is so beautiful to me, because it is entirely James and Regulus and absolutely nothing else. 

anonymous asked:

do you like the phantom menace?


lemme tell you why The Phantom Menace is a shoddily-wrapped gift to human kind

1) The main protagonist (though, I suppose this term is used loosely, because there are some very strong secondary characters) is a teenage girl.

2) A teenage girl who is a QUEEN OF A PLANET



5) “I will not condone an action that will lead my people to war” hOLLA like what a kid. But you know the best part? She’s a girl who is incredibly brave, incredibly capable, and supremely awesome - but she’s also a teenage girl. She pouts when she doesn’t get her way and is hopelessly naive about some things and makes friends with funny little kids who are nice to her

6) it introduces the “main villain” of the entire franchise as a small, compassionate, loving, enslaved boy. The whole introduction of slavery and all that entails is another point altogether, but the fact that Anakin Skywalker is introduced as a child, not innocent, exactly, but filled with child-like hope and wonder and the ceaseless need to help others - mother love, that was a brilliant move. His character suddenly hold fifty times more depth. It makes the arc that much more heartbreaking and relateable. Because lemme tell you what - if Darth Vader were introduced as the angsty teenager he is in AOTC, it would have added very little to his journey. Sure, you get some more material, and they could have probably done a great job with it, but the fact that Anakin is shown as a child, a clean slate (though he is anything but clean) - it reinforces a thousand fold this Main Theme in star wars that is all about how the potential to do good is there in each and every single being. That idea that Luke clings to, believes in with all his heart? Yeah, reinforced. Everyone’s got that loving child inside of them, still. Even the Baddest of bad guys.

7) SHMI SKYWALKER. We’re almost to the Slavery Point, but Shmi. Lordy Lordy, this woman. She’s the most important character in the whole series, I think. Or one of the most. And you know what? She’s the one that pushes forward the belief that goodness can be found in everyone. She is the one who has undergone years of suffering and hardship and slavery and yet still teaches her son to be kind and hospitable and loving to a fault. She is the one who Anakin gets separated from twice, and both times are a critical juncture to his path and his life.

8) The slavery background. Now, I’m always gonna grump about how they never bring it up again in the next two movies, but the fact that it’s there makes Vader’s entire arc 34095839405x more powerful and heart shattering sorry but I’ll fight anyone who says othersie. Lovingly, of course. But I will fight u.

9) It also diversifies and broadens the SW universe? I mean, in the OT we rarely see the planets themselves, except for Endor. Hoth doesn’t count, becuase it’s all white. But WORLDBUILDING and a whole culture and the fact that yeah, horrible things are happening in the galaxy, just like they do here on earth, and yeah, the good guys don’t know about it and it’s not actually top priority.

10) Sassy Ewan McG in the background I’m sorry this was gold

11) I actually really love QuiGon’s character? I mean, I love that they introduced Obi-Wan as a padawn, actually, and made it clear that he was barely qualified to train Anakin from the beginning (honestly the entire set up of all the relationships was so very well done), but I also love the contrast between Qui Gon and Obi-Wan’s thinking. Obi-Wan is … well, he really believes in the Jedi Order. (long discussion, which I’ll not get into here but YAY beard boy meta). Qui Gon - well, he respects it, and believes in it, but his belief in the council itself is not exactly something to tell stories about? Which is a very interesting way of showing the differences within the Jedi Order itself, and, also, speaking of which, I LOVE the portrayal and introduction of the Old Jedi and how Qui Gon and Obi-Wan are so separate from the council at first. Up until this point, the only Jedi we’ve known really well is Luke (and Obi-Wan and Yoda, but Luke is our guy, he’s the main character, he’s the one we’re adhering to for “oh, this is how a Kedi is supposed to be”) anyway I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE.


13) Cool colours and ships and planets and people and a sudden influx of LIFE that was never present in the OT, and wow WHAT A BRILLIANT CONTRAST. Of course, this is also present (though slowly dwindling) in the other two movies, but TPM paved the way. It was the first one. It was the one that decided the others.

And now for the shoddy wrapping - yeah, the acting was a bit wooden at times, especially from the kids. Yeah, the plot was difficult to follow, and not particularly character driven, though it did have its moments. Jar Jar was endearing maybe 10% of the time, that last shot of Sheev’s face was the farthest thing from subtle that I have ever in my natural life witnessed, and I don’t even know what was up with that animatronics Yoda. BUT. Consider: beautiful choreography in the fighting, DARTH MAUL, Padme kicking 4309850459% butt, QUEEN AMIDALA’S WARDROBE, the entire theme of politics, which was literally the beginning of ANH like - bruh. Politics is a huge part of Star Wars. The entire Rebellion is essentially a political dispute that’s dragged to all-out war. The fact that the clone wars seemingly start because of politics is ideal, rather than making them into “wow random bad guy swoops in and tries to kill everyone”. THE SOUNDTRACK. Threepio with no plating one. THE INTRODUCTION OF ARTOO, Midichlorians, which is think are the COOLEST THING because wow science? And so many new and bright thoughts and concepts and ideas that were added to the SW universe. It’s not a cinematic masterpiece in acting or storytelling, but thematically? it’s EXCELLENT. And the character choices? ALSO EXCELLENT.

Basically, I can agree that sometimes TPM isn’t the most amazing. Certainly, only three of the six are truly amazing, and even ROTJ has its hangups when you’re not talking intensely character-focused scenes/Luke’s arc. BUT. WHY PEOPLE HATE ON IT. I REALLY DON’T KNOW.

this is probably so incoherent forgive me I tried