even though he has already been taken advantage of by a lot of people

his development isnt even him learning kindness though

he’s already got it in him he’s tremendously empathetic by nature and has an inherent sense of compassion but he’s been taken advantage of so much in the past for it that he is now convinced that letting himself be the compassionate person he actually is by nature is just going to get him hurt over and over again so he just tries to suppress it all and be tough and unapproachable and awful so people will leave him alone and no one will try to prey on him. he’ll talk a lot of shit and make fun of people a lot, but tries to dissociate himself from them because he knows if he thought about it too hard he’d start to feel bad because he knows this isn’t really him and he’s not really doing the right thing. if he sees someone crying it fucks him up BAD and his immediate instinct is to try to comfort them but he’s not very good at that because he’s so out of touch with his own emotions from years of suppression that trying to handle that kind of stuff whether its with him or someone else is very difficult

when someone DOES show him kindness its incredibly disarming to him and immediately makes it very, very difficult to suppress the impulse to return it back to them. his friendship with joey isn’t teaching him to develop something he didn’t have, it’s just making him feel safe enough to let out something he’s always had and learning that it’s not wise to keep suppressing his emotions and his ability to be compassionate and just… letting go of machismo

sid very much has the potential to be a wonderful person but i mean yeah for sure as he currently is he’s not a very good person at all he knows what he’s doing is shitty and just tries (and fails, he hates himself lol) to justify it to himself by saying he’s defending himself from a predatory world