even the purple matches

When We Collide (Part 17)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: NC-17

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

When We Collide on Wattpad

“Are you gonna eat that?”

“No, actually garlic has made me kind of nausea lately-,” Your eyes widened in surprise when the bread on your plate was gone like a light, you didn’t even get the chance to finish your sentence. 

“So you can just have it…” You nodded your head in confirm and leaned back on your chair wishing that this ‘blind date’ could be finished as soon as possible. 

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4

нιвarι ĸyoya ✧ lιттle anιмalѕ

↳ Requested by @badkerville

Every Me And Every You - Fourteen

When your alarm woke you up the next morning Spencer was still sprawled over your chest. His grip on your pajama shirt had loosened during the night but his arm was still wrapped around you.

You moved to grab your phone, swiping the alarm off and Spencer stirred, sliding off you and back to his own side of the bed when he realised where his head was.

“You didn’t have to move you know, I tend to set my alarms super early so I can snooze on and off. How are you feeling?”

He looked like hell, his eyes were red rimmed and the shadows underneath more prominent than normal even though you both seemed to have slept for a good seven hours.

He made a ‘meh’ sound before rolling on to his side and facing away from you.

“Reid, come on. Talk to me.” You scooted closer, feeling him stiffen.

“Spencer?”

“What!?”

“Don’t snap at me, I’m trying to be your friend here.”

He sighed and coughed, clearing his throat.

“I’m sorry. I’m just…. not sure how to feel about this. I mean, he’s my father. But I hate him. And now he’s dying. I should feel sad. The look on his face when he asked for my forgiveness was so… pathetic. And I feel like the worlds worst person because of the satisfaction it gave me to tell him no.”

You reached out and placed your hand on his side, just above his hip bone.

“Do you really feel that strongly that you can’t at least tell him that you forgive him, you don’t have to mean it? He’s probably in a lot of pain right now already. I know he can’t make what he’s done right, but…. Spence, he’s dying. He’s probably sitting there in his hospital room, going through a list of regrets he has and you can bet that not being there for you will be number one.”

Reid rolled back over so he was flat again, and shook the hair out of his eyes.

“He said that. That not seeing me grow up was his biggest regret. That, and hurting my mom by leaving.”

“There you go then.”

He closed his eyes, rubbing them with the heels of his hands.

“I don’t want to see him again.”

“So write him a letter and send it to the hospice. You don’t have to mean it but it will give a dying man some peace. He may not have played a huge part in your life Spencer, but he helped bring you into this world.”

He didn’t speak for so long after that that you worried he’d gone back to sleep. 
You grabbed your phone again checking the clock. Still plenty of time to get ready and get to work.

“Y/N?” his voice was small and defeated.

“Hmmmm.”

“Thanks for being you. For knowing that I needed a friend last night, when I didn’t want to ask.”

“Spence, we may have a slightly unconventional friendship right now but we are that, friends. Pretty good ones too. I’m here for you, whenever and wherever. I mean that. You want another hug? Then we have to get up, we both need to shower and that takes time.”

“We could always shower together, that would save time.”

You punched him lightly on the arm, glad to hear he was able to joke again. “No more hugs for you. Perv…..”

Spencer had been only mildly subdued at work, not enough for the others to notice though and luckily the week had passed quickly.

The team didn’t have a case, so the time was spent updating and reviewing old files and sorting through the never ending pile of cold cases that always got shipped up to the BAU.

Spencer and Rossi were lecturing in a neighbouring town, whilst Morgan was helping out at the Academy, speaking with new recruits.

As much as you enjoyed the chase and catching the “bad guys”, you also enjoyed spending time in the office, catching up on the gossip and bantering with your co workers. It also gave you all chance to catch up with mounds of filing that always accumulated.

By the time Friday rolled around and you still didn’t have a case, you were looking forward to the weekend.

“So, are you seeing Dan this weekend?”

You and Emily were seated at the tables in front of the break out area, her eating an apple and you working your way through a bag of Reeses Miniature Peanut Butter Cups. You only had an hour before clocking off time, you all praying that a case didn’t come in at the last minute.

Spencer was stood at the coffee machine refuelling, and you saw his ears prick up at the name Dan, him turning his body oh so slightly.

“Erm… Yes. I think. Providing we don’t get called away.”

“So what are you doing together? Is he taking you anywhere fancy?”

“Erm….. I don’t actually know. He mentioned maybe a play or something?”

Spencer had told you to think about what you wanted to try next but you hadn’t. Your evenings had been spent clocking some long overdue gym hours and spending time with friends. You really hadn’t spent much time thinking about your weekend plans, you almost didn’t want to let yourself, knowing that as soon as you started thinking about it, you wouldn’t be able to stop.

“Well don’t leave it too late if you’re wanting to catch a show, all of the good seats will be sold out.”

“I guess.” Hmmmm.

“Have you banged him yet?”

“Em!” You choked on a piece of chocolate coated peanut butter, reaching for your water bottle to rinse it down. You could see Spencer smirking out of the corner of your eye, stirring his coffee very slowly.

She shrugged and grinned. “Oh come on, don’t start acting all coy now. I remember you texting me after Sam and telling me how he was so big you wanted to take photos and frame them because you didn’t think anyone would believe you.”

Shit. Damn it… You’d been going through a dry spell at that time and had spent the evening flirting with a sandy haired bartender that worked at a bar you and Emily used to visit.

“He was pretty big. So much so that the actual sex wasn’t even that great. It hurt to walk the next day, and not in a good way. He may have been big, but he definitely didn’t know what to do with it.”

“So does Dan know what to do with his then? Is he good?”

You saw Spencer turn around, now leaning against the counter with his coffee cup pressed to his lips. Emily followed your gaze, seeing him stood there.

“Don’t mind him…. It’s just Reid. Spill.”

Just Reid. Oh if only she fucking knew.

“Fine. Yes we have. And yes. It was very good.”

His faced twitched, dimples starting to form where he was grinning.

“Marks out of ten?”

You thought about it very carefully.

“Eight.”

His smile dropped, turning into a frown.

“Only an eight?”

“Yup. He was good, but I’d have liked to come a few more times. One orgasm per encounter isn’t acceptable.”

“Hey, it’s more than some girls get.”

“True that.”

She tossed her core into the bin and walked back to her desk, you finally making eye contact with Reid.

He took Emily’s seat and leaned in, his voice barely above a whisper.

“You know, some ‘people’…. ” The air quotations signifying he was referring to people in the scene. “Would consider an eight to be an insult, and would double and then triple the amount of strikes that ‘someone’ else, might already have against them.”

“Then it’s a good job we’re at work and not playing in your apartment isn’t it?”

“A very good job, Snow.”

“Do you consider an eight to be an insult then…… Dan?”

“Nope. Because we were only just beginning. It’ll be a ten by the end of the weekend. Trust me. I don’t need a huge cock to take away your ability to walk.”

“I didn’t mean….. ”

“Oh hush, I’m not in the least bit insecure about that. I’m above the male average, and there’s plenty of ways to get you off with out that anyway. Plenty.”

With that, he stood and strutted back to his own desk.

Five o'clock came and Hotch dismissed you all, with the reminder that an easy week, probably meant for double the work the next.

The ride home with Spencer was quiet, you almost scared to ask what the plans were, making idle chitchat instead.

When you pulled up outside his building, he turned to you.

“Go home and pack. Do not shower. I want you back here no later than seven pm. Bring clothes for going out in the day time and something respectable looking for the evening. Bring the matching underwear set with the ties, the purple peek a boo bra with the crotchless panties and bring the stockings. Pack your tight black pencil skirt you were wearing two Mondays ago, with a white shirt. And bring your glasses.”

“The classic sexy secretary look? Bit clichéd don’t you think?”

“If I’m thinking correctly, I’d have guessed it was that film that spurred your interest in this in the first place, and given the little twitch you just showed then, I know I’m right. Not a terrible portrayal of BDSM in a functioning relationship actually. And it’s not a given that you’ll be wearing them, but I want options.”

“Okay.”

“Red and yellow at any time alright, Snow?”

“Alright.”

“And on Monday, I’ll be overhearing a conversation between you and Emily where you tell her that Dan, has been bumped up to a ten.”

“Sure thing….. Dan.”

He unbuckled his seat belt and slid out of the car. “Hurry along now, Snow. I’ll be waiting.”

anonymous asked:

I might be asking the wrong person but does krejjh count as trans if they come from a planet where the gender binary doesn't really exist?

Hi! Yeah, this doesn’t feel like my call.

Certainly Krejjh would be deeply, deeply uncomfortable describing themself as male or female, and I think they are very grateful that nonbinary humans have popularized concepts like a gender neutral “they” because it provides a framework on how to exist in a deeply gendered society without having to “pick a side.”

At the same time, of course, categories like “trans” and “nonbinary” were created by humans to describe human experiences, as a reaction to–and an extension of–human culture. And for Krejjh, raised in a place where absence of a gender binary is the default, I don’t know if it would be appropriate to use those terms. (Like, at least before living with humans all the time, gender didn’t factor into Krejjh’s identity at all, in any way.)

(The decision to seek a VA who identifies specifically as nonbinary came about because I ran this by as many nb folks as I possibly could beforehand–maybe two dozen. And of course there wasn’t total consensus because identity groups aren’t monoliths, but the overall majority opinion was, “Even though purple space aliens aren’t a direct one-to-one match with nonbinary humans, casting a nonbinary person to read lines about the weirdness of the gender binary system allows nb folks to be in on the joke. And also honestly there’s so little nonbinary representation that well, it’s better than nothing.”)

Bottom line: if you are trans and something about Krejjh resonates for you, please feel free to consider Krejjh as part of your community. I’m sure they’d be happy to be invited to the party; you will find them at the center of the dance floor, doing shots of hot sauce and entertaining the crowd with their best “cis human” impression. (”HEY FELLAS, ARE YOU READY FOR MY VERY SPECIFIC FEELINGS ABOUT THE COLORS BLUE AND PINK?”)

At the same time, if it feels like appropriation for an extra terrestrial to use terms created by a very maginalized group of humans–that makes sense too. And for what it’s worth, I think Krejjh would be so horrified to learn of the historical discrimination and violence faced by trans and non gender-conforming people that Krejjh would be totally okay with being told not to use those words for themself. (”Cripes, wow. Wow. Okay, if anybody asks I’ll just say that my gender is ‘pilot’?”)

tl;dr I don’t know!

anonymous asked:

You've seen Wonder Woman right? Could you do some Klance headcanon with the dance scene in the village where Keith and Lance dance together as the snow starts falling around them and they kiss? (You can change it up of course like they are on another planet and it's possibly galra!keith and atlean!lance or whatever up to you).

 ((I’ll try my best! Imma add some of my brotp too and slight plot. also warning there is a very slight shallura thing but its basically invisible))


- so basically this is all canon verse right? (taking place somewhere in season two, after the blade of balmera kind of, allura is not in “i hate keith” mode)

- Team Voltron want to take a break but can’t really decide on what to pick

    * pidge wants forest planet, hunk wants ground stuff etc.

- then our boy Lance was like, “DUDE, SNOW PLANET AND ICE”

     * “Can we make snowmen??” “Yes of course Hunk.”

     * Allura and Coran are like “boi wtquiznak is snow”

     * “Oh yes, we had something like that on Altea, although it wasn’t white or cold, more like hard, warm, and yellow looking trapezoids that fell from the sky!” 

     * “…what…”

- they go to a planet called “Noelle” (get it? it mean Noel lmao) and Lance is super freaking excited because he is cuban boy and has never seen snow except for on TV

     * keith, pidge, and shiro are all “0_o?!” (hunk is in the background explaining what snow is)

      * whats weird is that for the rest of the day keith begins to stare at lance for some odd reason, always just in the corner of his eye with an unreadable expression

- once they landed, all of them were disappointed to see that there was no snow (the planet is covered with some trees that have no leaves or branches, also all the paladin wear jackets and warm jeans with the symbols and color of their normal paladin armor)

     * “It must be that this planets star is to close for precipitation” allura said

     * everyone is sad but all eager to explore the planet and its people

- shiro, coran, allura greet the peoples leaders and started to walk with them, leaving the rest of the paladins to do what they want (the people of this planet kind of look like Balamerain only more Golem looking)

    * “Don’t follow any strangers, don’t take any weird substances, don’t start any trouble, stay hydrated, spend your money wisely, and if you need help just call me okay?” “Yes space dad, Shiro.” “And make sure lance doesn’t loose his lion again.” “HEY!”

- pidge and hunk go off together to look at some interesting stone looking robots and check out some hot chocolate like drink

- this leaves keith and lance to explore because coran made sure that they could be in groups

      * lance is of course annoyed by this and keith was indifferent (although he totally thinking of the many ways they could bond)

       * “Why do I have to stick with you?” “You don’t. *walking away” “Hey get back here!”

- they walk into the town and many people greet them their, always cooing over how short and cute they were (b/c these ppl r tall)

        * one of them actually picks keith up and lance is dying of laughter, even though seconds after wards he gets picked up as well 

      * “well i knew chicks would try to pick me up but this isn’t what i had in mind.” “*jealous glare from keith*” “what you jealous?” “no…”

- they both actually have a good time with each other, even though they teased each other over interests (”You actually want to look at knives?” “What’s the big deal over skin care products?”)

- the day also features some blushing lance because, since these people wear armor literally all the time, they are interested in their squishy skin

      * some alien lift ups keith shirt, who just gets really confused and awkward like that time that Arusain hugged him him (”man, u r cuddly.” “thank you.”)

     * lance just turned around and chokes a little and helplessly stares at him for a while (he gets redder when keith actually starts to giggle for being poked in the stomach) and lowkey a little jealous

        * “lance you have been glaring at the ground for ten minutes, whats wrong?” “n-nothing shut up mullet!” “??!?!”

- soon the day is over and its almost time to go (the planets day is shorter than earths) and before they leave, the queens (yes plural) of Noelle in insist a party underneath the purple, cloudy sky

- so everyone begins dancing and stuff (still hasn’t snowed yet, tho it looks like it) and the hot chocolate, which actually tastes like cherries, is going around for free

      * lol so it turns out its alcoholic and shiro has to take care of a drunken coran and allura

      * “Heyyyy daddy, you wanna *hic* use t-that Galrrraaa hand fer somethin’ else?,?” “Princesssssss nuuuu.” “Shuushhh, orange face, daddy is mine.”

     * shiro is so embarrassed and pidge is taking blackmail pictures while lance and keith are having trouble breathing over it

     * “Shiro I don’t think you should be drinking that.” “hunk, my son, this is the only way i can stay sane” 

- cue the slow dance (which kind of sounds like this, play it when reading bruh, but the instruments are huge lamp looking things) its not really that slow but the aliens around them all act like it is sooo (this is all taking place in the middle of a town, like the one in wonder women, only without threes and humans of course)

- Lance taps Keith’s arm and when he turns to him, he immediately forgets what he was going to say and gets a little flustered 

          * “Do you– uhM…like…wanna move feet with me?” “* concerned voice* Lance, did you have anything to drink?” “Hhhhhh nevermind, j-just stop being so annoying god Keith.” 

- But before Lance can stalk away to sulk in his failure, two aliens push them to the center of the dance ring thing.

       * they both are stunned but before lance could make a joke, keith put his hand in lances, not looking at him. lances heart gave a jump and put his other hand in keiths hand so now they are holding hands (the red paladin is blushing so hard rn cause he did not accept this cute boy to do that)

      * since their both just holding hands they kind of sway for a while before keith becomes bold it up and starts to swing them around

- Lance laughs at Keith and spins as well, soon they’re just swirling in time with the music and kicking legs with the beat slowly (occasionally one tires to dip the other, which was a hilarious and sweet sight for hunk and pidge to see)

      * When Lance tries to dip Keith, it actually works and lance brags about it with a grin (”Ha told you I could do it!” “Whatever Lance, bring me up now.”) and keith is kind of loving it

     * When Keith tries to dip Lance, it works but lances face was in pure shock and fear, he wasn’t excepting it, (”Warn me next time jesus!) and keith just snorts and spins him back up to cradle (XD) him in his arms (”Shut up, you’re just a baby” he teases)

- And then suddenly, its starts to snow, but the snow is purple, but its snow. Lance and Keith stop dancing to look up at the sky, panting from dancing, the air was suddenly cold so it made puffs. (crowd is in awe and even allura and coran sober up a little to watching)

- Lance breathes out a gasp as it flutters around them and one their faces, and Keith sticks out his tongue to catch some. (its adorable, so lance does so as well) And now the Golem people and their queen are humming a tune like this only maybe lower pitched, their eyes and chest glowing purple now to match the snow (even the kid Noelles are doing it lol)

- It just keeps going over and over again and Keith and Lance are glancing around themselves and both look at each other and are about to say something with big grins, but they fade away in the background.

       * Lance gets distracted by the snow in Keith’s dark hair, his flushing red cheeks, and what really takes his breath away is his violent eyes that were glowing with the light surrounding them.

       * Keith gets distracted by the warmth he suddenly feels in Lance’s hands, the way the others face looked softer with snow danced across it, and what really takes his breath away is his blue eyes seemed to be soaking in the light around them just to put it there.

- As the tune starts over again and again, they moved a little closer (they swore later it was only because of the cold) and before they knew it, the noses brushed against each other, Lance gulped down some butterflies, Keith’s drew in a sharp inhale.

         * and that is literally all they did for a couple of moments, just brushing noses like they were giving each other Eskimo kisses while their hands were stuck between their bodies

- Keith and Lance were obviously getting nervous, so nervous that Keith actually began aggressively nuzzle Lance’s face in panic (the aliens around them were still humming, although they shot some confused looks to the pair, like, “what are they doing to their face parts?”) 

- Lance laughed nervously and breathlessly and finally spoke, “Hahahh, uhm, t-thank you?” to which Keith replies as natural as possible, “Just uhh, keeping your face warm?”

- The blue and red paladin stare at each other. Then they both make the decision to warm each other even more, they kiss.

       * Keith tilts he head and kisses deeper, while Lance kisses back lightly

      * They don’t exactly kiss more after the first one so much as smooch each others lips multiple times in little tingles and brushes

- They’re faces are so red when they stop for the first time and both let out breathes of laughter, the music has stopped and their is chatting going on around them. So they step back from each other. Lance laughed harder but Keith was the first one to speak again, “Did you like the snow?” he mumbled. In reply Lance said, “Yeah, its pretty cool.”

- They didn’t kiss or talk about the kiss for the rest of the night but stick close to each other and softly just joked around and teased one another

      * btw pidge, hunk, and shiro got so mad because pidge’s camera died before it culd capture them kissing, but they never tell keith and lance that they saw. at least they caught them dancing (the two blush everytime the mention it)

- At the end though, Keith turned to Lance and just stared at him, beaming. Lance beamed back, because now they had an unspoken secret between them. And they loved it.

        * side note: coran and allura got major hangovers, the paladin had to take care of them and make some kind of weird Altean medicine that lance dumped over keith’s head and laughed. keith promptly punched him in the face. don’t worry though, they both still are in major like/love territory 


((WELP I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THAT! This took me like two hours, also i lowkey never watched Wonder Woman and had to look up what you were talking about. i’m 99% sure this was the most fluffiest thing I have ever wrote))      

O Death -Chapter One.

*I came up with this at 3am got so excited that I made chapter one right away. I want to post it here first to get some feedback*

~SUMMARY: Ryan Haywood didn’t want to be the Vagabond. He didn’t want to be part of the Fake AH Crew. He didn’t want to kill, but one mistakes years ago literally comes back to haunt him making him the monster he is today.~


  Ryan wakes in the back of a moving van. Blue eyes scan the surroundings as his heart rate picks up. Straight across him is a man decked out in everything orange and purple. Even the rifle in his hand matches. Ryan nervously eyes said rifle. He knows the man is familiar, but his brain refuses to supply an answer. All he knows is no one has questioned why he’s awake, meaning he is here willingly.


  To his right a man, taller than the last, sits with his phone in hand and a pistol in his lap. His dirty blonde hair is the brightest thing about his outfit. Across from him another man with almost red, curly hair calls him “Boi.”


  Ryan still can’t remember who they are.


  “Great work guys! Another successful heist written in the books!”


  Ryan tries not to jump when a man in the front passenger seat turns to speak to them. Driving the van is a woman in an Hawaiian shirt with red hair. When she speaks Ryan’s blood runs cold.


  “Ryan, you were an animal out there! Normally, I try not to encourage you, but if you hadn’t stepped in and practically ripped that man’s throat out, Michael would have been dead.”


  Hands begin to shake as the man in question looks down. The nervous hands are covered in someone’s blood and by his feet lays a rather dangerous looking machine gun. Ryan reaches up to feel his face only to obtain contact with a cold unforgiving mask.

  “Ryan?”


  Blue eyes shoot up to meet the man in orange and purple.


  “Jeremy?” his voice somehow supplied the answer.


  Slowly, Ryan was remembering where he was, who he was with, and who he was.


  “Thought we lost ya there, Battle Buddy. You okay?” Jeremy asked.

  “Great. Just thinking… about what Geoff said.” names were coming back to his mind. So was the act he had to perform around this group of men.


  “What’s wrong with what I said?” Geoff’s voice raises at the end in a comical sort of way.


  Ryan hesitates before forcing a laugh. “Another successful heist? When have we ever been successful?”


  The van erupts into laughter. No one notices how uncomfortable and forced Ryan’s is.


×××××


  Once the crew arrives back at their safe house, Ryan locks himself in his room. The others classify it as “normal.”


  Memory comes at Ryan like a train. He is Ryan Haywood. The Vagabond, part of the Fake AH Crew. He is one of the deadliest killers out there. Only that’s not him. He doesn’t actually do anything. Some would call it multiple personality disorder, but Ryan knows better. It’s something supernatural. Demonic if you will. All because he was stupid years ago. Now, anytime he let’s his guard down, the monster comes out to play.


  Taking the mask off is always a relief. Why the demons choose to wear this. He’ll never know. It sticks to his skin uncomfortably and leaves red marks around his eyes. Technically those could be from lack of sleep, but who’s going to correct him. With a sigh, the Vagabond sheds his metaphorical battle armor and tries to wash away the facepaint and blood from today’s events with a shower hotter than Hell.


  Once “clean” he checks himself in the mirror, using his towel to wipe away the fog on the glass. There before him stands a corpse. Tired eyes stare back at him, once so bright and vibrant. They now remind him of murky lake water. Bruises wrap around his neck in the shape of a hand. Scars cover his chest and back and his bones are showing way to much for his liking. This is the side of the great Vagabond that the rest of the crew and the world doesn’t see.


  A knock on his door takes him out of his trance caused by self pity. He quickly wraps a towel around his waist before unlocking his door and opening it just enough to see Gavin standing there with a dopey grin on his face.


  “No.” Ryan tries to slam the door but the Brit wedges his foot in the way. The force of the door makes Gavin squawk in pain.


  “Oh come on, you don’t even know wot I’m going to say.”


  “Exactly. That’s why I said no.” Ryan glared. He hated to act this way towards anyone, but no one could know what was happening to him and he had to keep this psychopath act up for reasons he didn’t fully understand.


  “But, the Lads want to go out and we-”


  “Need someone to babysit. Tempting, but still no.” Ryan interrupted. It’s true he personally didn’t drink, so that left him the designated driver/ guardian of the whole crew, but he wasn’t even sure why the monsters wouldn’t let the Vagabond drink either.


  Gavin crossed his arms and pouted, reassembling a small child. “You’re no fun, you pleb.”


  “Thank you.” Ryan smiled and swung the door shut now that Gavin had moved his foot.


  Once again surrounded by the darkness of his room, the great Vagabond, crumpled to the floor. Sadness and confusion overtook him as he regretted every moment of his life. He ignored the slight chill that was caused by only wearing a towel as he rested his head on his knees and tried not to cry.


  He hated the Vagabond. Hell he hated the crew. No necessarily the people, he just hated what together they could accomplish.


  Ryan eventually calmed his breathing before getting up to find clothes. He stared into his generously large closet, debating if he should apologize to Gavin and go out with them. He’d feel terrible if something happened to them because he said no, but he couldn’t risk his inner demons being set loose on the town again. With a loud sigh he settled for a black t-shirt and a pair of boxers.

  A small hiss left his throat when he climbed into bed, causing a pulled muscle in his leg to flare up in pain. He ignored it and fell onto his back dramatically, hoping sleep would finally take over.


  Truth be told, Ryan can’t remember the last time he slept well. Like this morning, he awoke in the van with the crew, which means his mind and body was taken over in the middle of the night. There wasn’t much he could do to prevent the change when asleep so he made up for it by basically neglecting his health. If he was weak so were the demons. He rarely ate, drank barely enough water, and got sleep only when he was seconds from passing out. Today was an exception though. Ryan was to emotionally drained to try and stay up. He prayed for a break.


  The clock on his nightstand flipped to midnight. Blue eyes finally started to slide shut. The room became significantly colder. Once Ryan fully closed his eyes a icy blue mist circled the foot of his bed. What sounded like a whisper caused the man to stir in his sleep, not fully waking him though.


  Ryan laid in bed, completely unaware that the mist was creeping up his sleeping form, changing into what resembled a transparent hand. It stopped once it reached his face only to brush his hair out of his face. The contact caused Ryan to open his eyes slowly.


  Before he could shout the hand locked onto his throat, blocking his airway. He tried to struggle. To claw at the intruder, but nothing seemed to work. Eventually, he gave up. Part of him welcomed death. He began to wonder what the crew could say.

What felt like hours passed before he started to pass out. He became startled when he felt air enter his lungs again. The air felt cold as he breathed in something that wasn’t just air.


  The blue mist filled his lungs. It flowed through his entire being. His breath slowed as his mental state slipped away. A smirk formed in his lips as he opened his eyes that were practically on fire with blue flames.


  The Vagabond was ready to play.

April potter prompt

I think luna would show her pride by wearing clothes in the colours of the flags. As in quoiromantic ace luna wearing blue green black clothing and combining it with purple glasses. Also I think she would wear homemade bracelets and rings with different flag colours (also the black ring)

Sorry I thw one who made the luna clothing prompt. I’m a hufflepuff!

Luna’s family has never dressed in what other (mostly pureblood) wix deem appropriate. Xenophilius wears robes, but they’re often pretty pastels, and his robes are never tied up properly, displaying the various shirts and shorts he owns underneath. Pandora (Merlin bless her soul) wore muggle sundresses and big muggle sun hats, and if she wore a robe, she tended to wear it like a cape. Her parents encouraged eccentric clothing through which Luna could express herself. 

Although Luna actually does have a penchant for robes (they feel very nice, in her opinion), she most enjoys accessorizing with handmade jewelry and scarves (some of which she got when some very kind but very nervous house elves asked her to pick up one day when she was around where they were cleaning).

So when Luna ran across a quaint little muggle shop selling all sorts of accessories, she couldn’t help but be drawn to some of them, particularly the more colorful ones, in which she realized she could mix and match them to create her own pride look. Purple glasses, a necklace on green string that ends simply in a question mark, and some plain bracelets and necklace chains that she could customize with her craft supplies at home were some of the first items she just had to buy. 

Luna felt so proud wearing her small pride items, she couldn’t help but upgrade to some full-on pride outfits. Madam Malkin’s is happy to customize robes for a little extra charge. Between that and some lucky finds in Secondhand Robes, Luna finds her closet fuller with some gorgeous black robes and deep purple robes with options for a green, purple, white, or even gray tie-around, plus matching hats with similar tie-arounds. She also found a lovely hat that, with a little cleaning and just a little magic, is pure-white with a black tie-around which luna enchanted to look purple depending on the viewer’s perspective.

To round out her outfits, Luna couldn’t help herself from getting some wonderful shoes from a muggle ship. Some knee-high, soft boots in purple and some comfortable sneakers in green.

The black ring, which she never takes off except when she washes, was actually a gift from Ginny. Luna never really felt the need to come out, nor did she feel the need to hide. So although her being a quoiromantic asexual never really came up, Ginny figured it out through her attire, and gifted Luna the black ring one birthday.

Some snobby wix may stick up their noses at Luna’s attire, but others get a thrill of wonder when Luna walks by and can’t help but think they must not be alone in how they feel.

~Hufflepuff Mod

Strange Love. [Part two.]

{Part One}

Rating: PG-13.

Word count:3000


the crowds around you laughed people slowly trickling out of the building, I grinned shaking my head walking down the somewhat empty hallways saying goodbye to the few friends I had, a sad nostalgia falling over me.

and all the friends I had seemed to graduate, me, left being a lonely junior as it was late may entering June, the air still cool with excitement for the future, I was going to come back in the fall a senior.

As I walked the hallways I remembered the brief memories of high school that was enjoyable, mostly consisted of being by myself, even when I slept with the most popular guy in school…

It made me think of Michael only moments ago walking across that stage his hair bright red not even close to matching his purple graduation gown, and It made me scared when I saw those bright eyes that I had somehow fallen in love with … well I wouldn’t consider it love, who am I kidding, I’m hopeless, I sighed finally getting to the exit of the school building, but I stopped myself.

Seeing the entrance to the music room it calling me teasingly, fuck it.

Pushing the door opened I was greeted by the warm lighting shining through the right large windows with several instruments strung around the room, after that one night stand I spend most my school days here. pathetically hiding from the guy that like to dye his hair and liked hot-coco.

As I walked to the back of the room I noticed the top shelf, it, of course, looked like nothing was up there, but if you reached really far back there was my song notebook I gave up taking my song notebook home a long time ago, just relying on writing songs here when no one else was here, surprisingly not that many people were into the musical arts here.

My fingers clasped the familiar leather bound book a light smile curving my lips, they had grown over time, my whole self-changing making me a lot more attractive to the male gender, but as much as I tried to like someone my eyes were forever set on the light pair of green eyes, who had a big dick.

I usually avoided all eye contact with him, it was like this wave of embarrassment washed over me, remembering that night clearly, I was such a clutz in bed compared to how experienced he seemed to be, and I forever tried to push the thought to the back of my mind.

I flipped through the pages the overwhelming nostalgia at my fingertips until my eyes landed on one particular song,

Everyone wants to know if we fucked on the bathroom sink.

those lyrics spoke in more than one way, the next day with my thighs aching and a wash of embarrassment as I remembered Truth or Dare, everyone in the school seemed to know what happened that night, they only filled in the blanks, thinking we did unthinkable things, girls glaring in my every direction as guys whispered low ‘I had given him the best blowjob of his life’, that rumor was my particular favorite.

If we were high on amphetamines.

Those were the rumors that made me feel angry, girls saying Michael had to be on drugs to have sex with someone Like me, to a point it sounded like we were chain smoking the highest drugs in the country Like I even wanted to try drugs.

We wrote a story in the fog on the windows that night, they think I’m Insane, they think my lover is strange.

 That’s the beauty of a secret
You know you’re supposed to keep it
That’s the beauty of a secret  

Now those lyrics  I kept them close, like how you keep your own enemy’s closer, those words haunted me but it was like Michael was warning me on how to keep the rumors from getting to me.

Some words were scratched out as I wrote it 6 hours after most of the aftermath, as tears streaked down my cheeks, I felt like I was worthless that day, but in a way it changed me for the better, looking at the tear-stained page.

 Everybody’s waiting up to hear if I dare speak your name
Put it deep Beneath the track, like the hole you left in me.

Michael had left a hole in me, I felt empty, a lot of the times dreaming of his warm touch and I know… How pathetic, but sometimes I think it’s the only thing that keeps me sane, he didn’t look affected at all the next day acting like he was a God as normal but there was something about him the threw everyone in the school off.

They know you walk like you’re a God, they can’t believe I made you weak.

He didn’t hook up anymore, a few guys joked about him having erectile dysfunction, but I heard the quickly hushed whispers saying I had made him like me, saying he pushed everyone away that even dared to breathe in his presence, but if he really liked me he would have talked to me after this whole year.

I tried humming along to the lyrics I had made the whole structure of the song but I couldn’t find the right we for it to play … nothing seemed to fit, it was like making a sound that described that night, and I couldn’t find a way to the pieces together, so after a while, I gave up, but now as I looked over the put together song I couldn’t help myself.

My hands setting down the heartfelt notebook and grabbing a spare acoustic by the corner, the far best-tuned guitar in the building, no one really bothering with it, well except me, my fingers trying to find the perfect cord.

but nothing …

I puffed out my cheeks letting the guitar go back to its corner and sprawling out on the pine smelling carpet, closing my eyes as I felt the afternoon sunlight shine down through the room the Australian sunlight warming my skin, how could a song be so hard to play.

So I began to softly repeat the lyrics, having looked over them so many times it came to me pretty easily, trying to make a tune for the song, but I guess the good things don’t come easy.

“Y/N?” With those words I shot up off the carpet looking up seeing the green eyes I wish I never fell in love with, his lips curved together like I remember them, soft and pink.

He must be the devil himself.

My eyes so focused on the attractive male that stood over me I didn’t see his hands occupied with the notebook in front of him, but as my eyes trailed downwards I made a mad dash trying to get up as fast as possible so he didn’t read the song.

“Michael!” I screeched in unease, he shouldn’t be reading that my hands barely brushing my own paid for notebook before he pulled it from my grasp holding it above his head continuing to read.

I teetered on the heels of my feet pulling at his frame, as his black snapback fell off his head he looked high up at the notebook, wasn’t he supposed to be celebrating is graduation?!

“I walk like I’m a god?” He scoffed a sly smirk playing at his lips.

“Wha- No! That’s not about you!” My hands barely touching the thin pages.

“Oh sure miss virgin.”

“Technically that’s not true,” I argued as much as I didn’t want to bring that up.

“You’re right about one thing.” He snorted, fucking snorted.

“Michael! what the hell!” finally being able to pull it away as I held to my chest, looking at him in dismay, that was private.

“Didn’t know you were so artsy miss Y/L/N” He wiggled his eyebrows, that still had the beautiful black piercing through one.

“Yeah I guess so, and these words aren’t for anyone’s eyes to see, especially you.” I whipped around away from him, hoping he didn’t notice the pink tint slowly rising up my neck, as I Attempted to put the notebook back on the top shelf towards the back where no one would ever see it.

“So the song was about me.” His husky voice whispered in my ear his hands gripping my hips as his hot breath tickled the back of my neck.

“No! You cockface!” I spun around again crossing my arms, But I secretly wanted him to put his hands on me and grip my hips again.

“Cunt.”

“Little bitch.”

“Motherfucker.”

“Douche bag.”

“So you’re looking for a tune for your song?” He completely 360’ the conversation, as I blinked repeatedly trying to get what he just said to me.

“No, I have a tune, just not the right cords,” I muttered tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, I had a small idea what the song could sound like but not really.

Within seconds Michael seemed to have a plan set in his mind as he grabbed the notebook from me again and stalked towards the guitar, his skilled fingers strummed across the strings the other calloused hand on the fret board, my mouth going dry.

“Are you just going to stare or help me with this?” His eyebrows raised with expectation.

-

an awkward silence settled over the both of us, my thigh touching his own thigh, as he has the guitar sat gently on his lap, we had done it, found the cords, that were surprisingly easy enough for me to learn them, the tune and the words that echoed out of my mouth were twisted and hot, I think we weren’t speaking now because we knew that’s was the ending of this shared time together.

And I realized how much I had missed him, after a year of trying to stray away from his beautiful features, I wanted to kiss him as if we were the only one’s on this earth, but that would be cliche. .  . and awkward,

“I-I” He broke the silence, struggling to put together his own words, his eyes focused on the sun that was starting to set through the large windows of the high school he would leave and never look back to see, where I’d no longer see his lips quirk into that sneaky smirk or hear his laugh, thinking about this made me try to swallow the heavy lump in my throat.

“You know you’re the only girl that never tried to approach me.” Michael laughed as if it was the funniest thing in the world, but I couldn’t find the humor in his voice, his laugh dying down as he went deep in thought.

“I wish you talked to me after that night.” His voice sounded so small, he set the guitar down next to the stage we were sitting on.

getting up off the stage, this was the exit scene, the time where we wouldn’t talk anymore, possibly running into each other one day in twenty years time with screaming kids and regrets and happiness, he was a one night stand I wish lasted forever.

His rough hands reached into his back pocket of his normal black tight jeans revealing my grey bra with the black lace lining it, the bra I couldn’t find that night, a smile broke out on my face as I remembered him falling over in his jeans half-way down his milky legs as at him seeing my bare chest, but my smile was quickly gone.

“Do you give back all the clothes the girls who you hooked up with you, or do you keep some for a prize?” I couldn’t help the jealousy slipping into my tone, but he had been known for his sex life, was this just a trick for me to sleep with him again?

“The girls I slept with? what girls? all I can recall is one.” amusement was written all across his face.

my mouth went agape at this… he was a virgin when we had sex?

“But. the people who claimed they slept with you . .” I trailed off, my head spun at the thought.

“People just said that stuff to fit in, I just didn’t deny it.  If you walked up to Jenny Weavers and told her you knew it was all a lie, she’d probably burst into tears begging you to not tell anyone.” He shook his head, looking up at the ceiling his Adam’s apple bobbing.

“But you were experienced.”

“That’s just the work of a lot of porn, the summer of 2011 when I was 14 and had nothing better to do than masturbate most to of the time.” Michael chuckled licking his lips,

“All right if this is all true how come when you called me out for being a virgin, you didn’t tell me you were a virgin yourself?” I raised my eyebrows and crossed my arms, As I saw a rosy red color rise to his cheeks.

“I didn’t want you to think I was a loser, Did you really think I was experienced?” His smile lighting up my day as he sat down next to me, I could see the sun starting to disappear across the horizon behind him, making the room completely dark, but after being in this room most of the day my eyes had become adjusted to the lighting, Michael’s probably the same.

“Yeah, you dufus! that was my first time anyway it’s not like I had anyone to compare to.” a smile breaking out on my face.

“You didn’t have sex with anyone after me?” a light smile on his lips, and God did he look kissable.

“Fuck No!” I giggled, “after I had been with someone with a dick like yours I don’t think sex could ever be the same.” I joked, he bent his head back in laughter.

“Have you seen what kind of moans that can come out of your mouth y/n? God! better than any porn star ever, and after going over this erotic song I pretty sure your basically a porn star.” He said a heavy blush was now on my cheeks as I playfully punched his shoulder.

Between my loud giggles, I could barely hear Michael say, “Can I have your number?”

“On one condition.” a wide smile lit up my face.

“What?”

“You have to fuck me again,” I whispered in his ear I could feel the shivers going down his spine.

“Deal.”

He whispered back, his lips making contact with mine once again, our teeth clashing due to how much we were smiling, his rough hands gripping my hips 'So mean’ like I wrote in that damn song, and damn was that line ever so true.

“Not here,” he laughed detaching from kissing down my neck, my own heavy breaths filling the air, wanting to just feel him inside of me once again.

I didn’t even comprehend that my legs were straddling his waist as he laid on the carpeted stage of the music room, our only light source being the moonlight from the large windows and the small lighting coming from the hallway where a janitor must have left it on.

Slowly  I climbed off the red head, holding out my hand to help him get up, my eyes lingering around the room seeing Michael’s snapback laying upside on the floor from when he was reading our song, after helping him up I picked up the black snapback lying it backwards on my own head and facing the grinning boy who I was going to sleep with.

“Sexy as hell, Babe.” His husky voice shook, his dilated pulis fixated on me, my own heart fluttering at the nickname.

“Let’s get out of here.” I tiptoed pressing kissing him once again.

He grabbed my hand grabbing the notebook that never made it to the top shelf and guiding me out of the music room, we walked down the hallway and never have I been more excited to exit these dreadful doors, with my lover at my side.

“What?” He growled in frustration as he pulled on the school doors again, as I let go of his hand to try to pry open the doors, that were locked, we were locked in.

“Nooo.” I groaned throwing my head back in annoyance.

“How am I supposed to wreck you now?” His lips forming into a gorgeous pout, as he said those words he seemed to come up with an Idea only formed from Michael Clifford himself.

“I know a way.” leaning into me, his eyes shining with mischief.

“Oh really?” I asked.

“Yep, me fucking you in the teacher’s lounge.”

He leaned a little bit closer to whisper the naughty words “On their couch.”

a wave of pleasure shook me at the thought of him fucking me into oblivion, but my good morals said something else.

“No! I see my teachers practically every day I wouldn’t be able to look at them with a straight face without thinking of your dick.” I shook my head.

“An even better reason to do it.”

A silence settled over us, as Michael looked down at me with puppy dog eyes, my own eyes trying to form a scolding look of 'no.’ but fucking Clifford and those eyes.

“Fineeeeee”

“Yay! Finally, I can get back at my math teacher who will sit on that couch where I fucked the most beautiful girl in the world.” He cheered dragging me down the hallway.

You rolled your eyes, just another reason you loved Michael Clifford

I’m sorry I’m a really emotional writer.

Malec does yoga

”You want me to do what?” Alec asked, flabbergasted. Magnus ignored him, simply shook the fabric in his hands as if Alec wasn’t already staring at the material.

“Yoga. With me. Right now.” Magnus moved swiftly towards Alec, moving fluently like water downstream. Alec could stare at the warlock for eternity. His confidence, his simple grace, his dancing movements and the easiness with which he carried himself.

Alec shook himself from his stupor when Magnus shoved the yoga pants into Alec’s arms. They were surprisingly soft, but they were also Magnus’, so they would probably reach Alec’s knees at the most. “I’m not doing yoga,” he rebutted. Magnus rolled his eyes but otherwise completely ignored Alec’s comment as he intertwined their hands and dragged him into the bedroom.

“Change. You can just do it in your t-shirt, but those jeans will not allow any sort of flexibility. I’ll go set up in the living room.” Magnus turned on his heel and left. Alec swore he saw a trail of glitter reflecting the bedroom light.

Alec sighed as he slowly peeled off his jeans and struggled into the yoga pants. They were a size or two too small, but there was room for …. everything, so Alec supposed that was a win. They did only reach the tops of his knees, though.

With another drawn-out sigh, he trudged into the living room. Magnus had changed as well, and while Alec was certain he wouldn’t enjoy yoga, he did enjoy Magnus’ biceps on display in his yellow muscle tee, and his thighs and ass in black yoga pants. For the second time within ten minutes, Alec had to tear his eyes off of the warlock - his warlock - as he took the final steps inside the room.

Magnus had moved the couch and the coffee table so the space was cleared in front of the huge TV, and laid out two matching purple yoga mats. He’d even laid out towels and two waterbottles which Alec internally scoffed at. Yoga wasn’t hard. It was just a waste of time.

Nonetheless, Alec took a seat on one of the mats. Magnus absentmindedly ran a hand through Alec’s hair as he turned on the TV and started whatever program he used when he did this. Alec relaxed into the touch and nudged Magnus’ hand slightly to make him keep going. He faintly heard Magnus chuckle somewhere above him, but he didn’t care, too wrapped up in the gentle fingers scratching at his scalp.

“Are you ready, angel?”

Alec smiled at the nickname despite the slight blush that bloomed on his cheeks. “Yeah, let’s get it over with.”

Magnus leaned down to drop a kiss on Alec’s forehead before sitting down on his own mat.

The first few poses was no problem, and Alec found himself relaxing a bit. It was quite calming.

But then the poses got more complicated. Magnus twisted his body without problems, raising his legs and twisting his abdomen in ways Alec could only wish to do. The Shadowhunter struggled to keep up even as his muscles screamed that he couldn’t bend that way. It was like playing a game of Twister with himself - a game he’d never known until Magnus made him and Isabelle play it the first time they brought Max to meet the warlock - and in the end Alec had to surrender and simply collapse on the mat.

He stared at the ceiling for a moment or two before the sound of the cheery woman from the yoga DVD cut off. Suddenly, Magnus was hovering above him, a shiteating grin on his face. “Having troubles, my darling?”

“Just a bit,” Alec wheezed. His body was aching and his temples were itchy with sweat. Magnus looked far too pleased with himself, which Alec couldn’t accept. He managed to sit up, forcing Magnus to back away, and whip his shirt over his head. He balled it up and threw it away before falling back on the mat.

He knew his chest was glistening with sweat in the sunlight spilling in from the huge windows in Magnus’ loft, and if he closed his eyes, he’d look a bit like how he looked when Magnus went down on him.

Alec had never thought of his body as something desirable. He knew he was muscular, he knew his face wasn’t ugly or anything of the sort, but before Magnus, he’d never realized the power he could have over another person like this. Magnus was frozen next to him when Alec’s eyes fluttered open again. The warlock’s eyes had gone wide, and he gulped lightly when Alec met his gaze.

“You’re horrible,” Magnus whispered under his breath.

Alec smiled sweetly, crooking a single finger in Magnus’ direction, beckoning him forward. Magnus took it a step further and dumped himself on Alec’s thighs. Magnus slipped a manicured finger into the waistband of Alec’s yoga pants and snapped them against his skin lightly. “They suit you,” Magnus muttered absentmindedly as his eyes roamed over Alec’s upper body. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen a hundred times before - they had been together for almost ten months at this point - but he always had the same reaction when faced with Alec naked.

“You should see my ass. It looks huge,” Alec teased as his hands instinctively wrapped around Magnus’ hips.

“Oh I’m planning on it,” Magnus growled as he leaned down and sucked Alec’s lower lip in between his own.

“Yeah, yeah let’s go do that now.”

4

These are just some single tile stone patterns I like to use on the edges of my cobblestones, around certain buildings or public works projects and even just randomly around town!  They match all of the other purple paths from my town of Nocturne! 


anyone is welcome to use, reblog, like, tag me in pictures where you use them, etc, but please don’t repost <3

Imagine: Don Maroni Forgetting Your Birthday

Originally posted by hardiwb

Requested by Anon: “Can u do one where the reader is a part of Maroni’s Hitmen and they all forget it’s her birthday and feel awful about it (sorry there’s like no Don Maroni fluff and I need it my life)”

Don Maroni x Reader: angst/fluff

My requests are open! Please feel free to drop me one here, or let me know what you thought about this ficlet :)<3

Keep reading

oathkeeper-of-tarth  asked:

Michiru and Setsuna with 22

Things You Said After It Was Over


I assembled her outfit carefully. It would have been more appropriate, I suppose, to have dressed her in a suit. I even looked at them, hanging in her closet, ran my hands over the wool/cashmere blends—those were her favorite, suitable for all season a relatively wrinkle resistant, hanging nicely on her narrow frame—but I couldnt select one. Laughably, I worried that she might be uncomfortable. Our minds are erratic things at the best of times, and I coudn’t begin to explain how my mind wandered in this dark hour.


And so I selected something more casual. The blue shirt with the pearl buttons I liked so well, the one that brought out the eyes she would never open again. The navy sweater with the deep neck to contain the warmth her body no longer held. One of her whisper-soft undershirts, she was always so picky about that layer closest to her skin, and I refused to let anything harsh touch her now, of all times.


I misted a little bit of her cologne on the sweater. She would smell wrong, scrubbed medically and devoid of the spice of her own scent. No tiny smear of oil and grass to round out the smell I knew as Haruka. But this would help, at least.


Most people left me alone to my ministrations.


You are not most people.


“I think she will look lovely in that, Michiru.” You appeared, like always. It’s not as if you go places, you are simply in them when one looks up. It’s very off-putting.


I didn’t respond to you. What would you have me say? She looked lovely in everything, even that awful mustard suit she liked so well. Even that terrible purple shirt that matched my pink one. She wore it whenever I suggested. I don’t know that she actually even liked it, but she liked the idea of belonging to me. Belonging was so important to her. She wore it with cuffed chinos and loafers without socks, as if the shirt by itself wasnt—what did Mina call it? Lesbian Dad. Yes, as if the shirt wasn’t Lesbian Dad enough on its own.


I laughed in spite of everything.


You smiled and drifted to my side. “She was very funny, wasn’t she? Sometimes without trying to be.”


I looked up at you. Why were you talking about her? Why try to bring her to my mind? If I can just focus on what needs to be done, I can survive one more day. I push the way her shoulders came up when she laughed from my mind.


“I hope the catering is all in order, Pluto.” I folded the clothes into a bag. “And the flowers.”


“Everyone is taking care of everything, Michiru. It’ll be the kind of ceremony she deserved.” You reached out to me, but I stepped away.


“If Mina has her way, I’m certain there will be an open bar.” I clutched the bag close to my body. “If you’ll forgive me, I need to deliver this to the funeral home. God knows what they would dress her in without my intervention. I am her only real family, you know, I must be involved in every aspect, so, if you please, I’m sure you know the way out.”


You stood for a moment, frowning. “May I come? I could drive, even. I know you don’t usually drive…” You trailed off sadly.


“No, that’s fine. It’s not as if the only one with a license in this house was Haruk–” Her name stuck in my throat like a hard candy, and my body cried out for air. I looked up to the ceiling, as if some agent of mercy who never existed would swoop down and restore her to me, or at least bring me along.


Your arms were around my shoulders, gripping me tightly. “It must hurt so badly, Michiru.”


I remembered to breathe again. “Life is meant to be pain, and everything we love is meant to be taken away from us eventually. I’m no different from the rest of the world.” I can’t move, can’t let go of the bag, shaking now. I hope she doesn’t notice that I am losing my careful control, that my heart cannot bear the flood of memories. I can survive, if I cut it off, if I allow it to become the shriveled brown nothing it was before Haruka scaled the walls of my secret garden and brought it to life.


“Haruka’s love wasn’t a punishment for you.” You said it so simply, and I hated you for seeing through me.


“Stop.” It was both command and plea.


“You were so wonderful for her.” Every word she said was like a lash unto my back. “You brought so many lovely things out in her.”


I looked at the bed, and all I can see is Haruka snuggled happily under the covers, her hand reaching out to me as always, always looking for some small affections. I can feel my cheek against her shoulder as we sat in the park together, Haruka pointing out particularly charming birds she doesn’t remember the names of but likes the look of, tiny feathered tennis balls of things, hardly graceful at all but very much loved by her. She loved to feed the pigeons. I teased her about it.


The memories grew dark, they always did, they never stayed in the light of the past. I didn’t protect her. The only banner I swore myself to, and I failed. She was covered in blood and in bruises, she was shaking and she couldn’t breathe. And what did I do? Nothing. I rocked her in my arms and told her I loved her. That she was brave. That she had done well. And then it was over.


“I’m so sorry, my love.” I didn’t even know I had said it, and as soon as I heard my voice echo off the walls, I sank to my knees. The weight of her loss too heavy now to bear. You came to the floor with me, and I shook my head. “Leave me alone.” I took a deep breath and tried to yell, but it came out a weak whine. “Let me die.”


You held me tight and whispered in my ear. “You did everything you could for her. And we’ll do everything we can for you.”


“I’m nothing now, I don’t care about the world, I don’t care about the Princess, I don’t care about Crystal Tokyo. I will fail all of you. All of you. And I’ll laugh while I do it.” I tried to pull away, but you were too much. “Damn the world anyhow!”


“No, no, you don’t think that.” You paused. “You might think that. But Haruka, you can do it for her. She died trying, Michiru, we have to take up the sword for her. And you’ll see how we love you, and you still have a family. Michiru, don’t give up.”


You were so sweet, to love me, Pluto. To assure me that I was loved. You did drive me to the funeral home that day, and you sat with me for many hours in the aftermath of her loss. I never healed. I carry her with me like a ragged cross, rubbing the skin from my back and digging splinters into my blood.


That was a year ago.


I do not believe in an afterlife, a heaven or a hell. Heaven and hell is too terrifying a concept for me—I cannot be separated from Haruka for eternity. But my only peace will come with oblivion, and so I look forward to it. I have seen this day a thousand times, this battle we will fight. I am pleased to report I never survive. That I will follow Haruka into the darkness. I am not afraid, Pluto.


I’ve laid out the pink dress Haruka liked so well on the bed. If you ever loved me at all, please lay me beside her. The paperwork is in the top drawer of the desk.


I love you, my friend.