I’m new to this, but I love what I’m reading in the feed lately, so, trying my hand!
What if the greatest diplomacy problem in dealing with humans is that they seem to lie about past events constantly, even to someone who witnessed the same events? Then it’s discovered that humans have recording devices of all kinds– security cameras, diaries, mp3– and the problem becomes clear. Humans lie, but not that badly. The poor, fretful creatures just have a species-wide brain defect. Kindly aliens take to recording every event and encounter they can, then preface every diplomatic meeting with a record swap so the humans can brush up on what actually happened and the aliens can get some insight into what the humans have been falsely thinking happened. Ambassadors to Earth get supplementary training in how to handle people with memory impairments, and human ambassadors to other worlds start hiring aliens– ANY aliens– to be their assistants. Everything smooths out after that.
Religion. Aliens intellectually understand how religion works and that there are different kinds, but they don’t really “get” it. The biggest confusion regards whether the humans, who do seem to have some sort of empathic abilities at least, are actually communing with incorporeal beings/forces… and if so, why some humans seem able to commune with more than one, while other humans not at all. Notable scholars have decided that the rituals and paraphernalia have nothing to do with the beings or forces being communed with, but muddied the matter by suggesting that the rituals may be important for a human’s ability to commune. Alien non-scholars, eager to accommodate this new species and prove that space is nothing to be afraid of– nobody wants a repeat of the H’j’g’rcxin Xenophobia disaster– simply treat any and all religious requests as vital necessities for their human guests and crewmen. Accommodation becomes so ordinary that when the first religious argument erupts between an engineer and a navigator, the biggest shock is that one of them objects to the other wearing a turban, something which does not affect work performance in any way.
Styling. Alien species each have their own primary sense that they rely on, and when they find out that humans primarily rely on sight, well. Reliant on sight means that surface patterns and colorings are particularly important to them, right? They will have evolved to be individually distinctive in appearance? New human crew are automatically assigned a mentor from another vision-reliant species, so someone will be able to tell them apart until the auditory and pheromone labels are attached to their uniforms. Then Abby comes to mess with a new haircut and sparkly chapstick one day, and the mentor has no idea who she is or how she got aboard.
Word of Stabby the Space Roomba spreads, and soon every ship with a human captain or sufficiently high number of human crew has a Stabby. Names vary, but most of them are Stabby. One ship becomes low-key known for sending out broadcasts of Stabby McStabberson, son of Stabberson, son of Stabber, and its adventures stabbing juice boxes in zero-G.
Aesthetics. Humans have a bewildering tendency to open starmaps or sneak into the scientific observation module at odd times, including with a mate or offspring, and just stare at open space. Not even particular stars, although they like to study and talk about particular stars and clusters at times, but just, the whole of space. Why do they do it? Nobody knows. Humans behave as though intoxicated during these times, but productivity lowers dramatically if they are barred access– if barring access even works in the first place, given humans’ seemingly endless ability to get into places where they aren’t supposed to be.
Fire. Due to different atmospheric content, inability to heal from burns, or just plain never needing to cook their food, no alien species has ever utilized fire as a tool. When humans say that learning to use fire may have been the start of their civilization, everybody believes that the humans are just talking a tough game to make up for their lower technology level, or– once they learn about human hierarchies– to compensate for a perceived lack of political status. Then a human sees a catastrophic explosion on a hostile planet and laughs. Then another shushes panicking engineers and smothers an accidental fire with some garments. Then another builds a bonfire out of dead plantlife and a shredded religious document to warm an injured alien crewman after xir endothermic suit is punctured and the planet rotates away from its sun. Humans– soft, cuddly, pack-bonds-even-with-inanimate-objects humans– are comfortably in control of the most terrifying force of disaster the galaxy has ever known. Aliens stop being surprised that we nearly made ourselves extinct so many times in history.
“Why does your larval stage look so similar to your mature stage? How do you know when a human is old enough to leave the Pit of Offspring? Or to mate?”
-He started off pretty small; stars and hearts and whatnot, but now he can make even the most delicate of designs
-He gives all the finished products to Patton who fusses over them like a proud parent because aww logan? this is so pretty??? i cant believe you made these for me?????
-Logan doesn’t tell Patton that methodically folding paper is just his way of de-stressing and he’s only giving him the final products to save space. Instead, he goes to make more
-Virgil is the only side that knows how to moonwalk
-Roman is furious, especially since Virgil not only refuses to teach him but now likes to moonwalk out of their arguments
-Roman eventually learns how to tap-dance as retaliation because yes he is that petty
-It’s not an uncommon sight for the others to walk in on Roman aggressively tap-dancing around an increasingly frustrated Virgil who jUST WANTS TO MOONWALK AWAY DAMN IT ROMAN STOP BLOCKING HIM
-Patton knits everyone Christmas sweaters. And Thanksgiving sweaters. And Halloween sweaters. And birthday sweaters. And Valentine’s Day sweaters. And Easter sweaters. And St. Patrick’s Day sweaters. And 4th of July sweaters. And Pride month sweaters. And
-The other sides suspect he’s started making up holidays as an excuse to knit more sweaters
-Sometimes Patton even makes them for inanimate objects. It’s not uncommon to see a chair draped in a bright red & yellow sweater, or a pretty blue sweater wrapped around the lamp
-It’s cute, but the others have to draw the line when Patton ties a sweater around the fridge. How are they supposed to open that now
-Virgil likes to bet with Patton on who’ll be the victor in Roman and Logan’s arguments (they both bet on Logan, so when he inevitably wins, all they do is swap money)
-Virgil likes to bet in general, usually about dares against Roman. No one is sure where he gets the money from but no one asks
–‘5 bucks says Roman won’t eat that expired sandwich I found in the back of the fridge’
*cue sounds of Roman frantically shoving the sandwich in his mouth because fUCK YOU I DO WHAT I WANT*
-Patton bruises like a peach, poor child
-He is very sensitive to everything around him being at the core of a lot of thomas’s feelings and all and that includes physical stuff too. Bump his head on the wall? Oh no it’s purple now. Hit his knee on the desk? That sure ain’t leaving soon
-It doesn’t help that he’s clumsier than a puppy
-Speaking of which, that black puppy he’s adopted? Yeah uh it’s name is Logan Jr and it’s too late to change it now
-Logan pretends to not like it, but he’s actually the one feeding and walking it the most. He’d rather have a cat but hey, what can ya do? It makes Patton happy
(Aaand that is all for now. Have a wonderful day, amigos ✌)
In most ancient cultures, people believed that everything, even so-called inanimate objects, had an indwelling spirit, and in this respect they were closer to the truth than we are today. When you live in a world deadened by mental abstraction, you don’t sense the aliveness of the universe anymore. Most people don’t inhabit a living reality, but a conceptualized one.
⚬ genre⇁smut, fluff? || witch!au, enemies to lovers
dubious consent at the end? bc potion, sexy times in a classroom, cumplay, dirty talk ^^
⚬ word count⇁10.1k
what makes for a potent potion? step one. in one room, gather two people who seemingly dislike each other step two. stir in a pinch of snark and four ladles of sexual tension step three. wait until everything simmers to a boil
“These wonderfully symmetrical plants show the fractal nature of math, physics and the universe. Could this be evidence of sacred geometry? “Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.”
The Golden Ratio, or Fibonacci sequence, is everywhere. It can be found in ancient architecture, in some of the world’s most beloved artwork (such as the Mona Lisa), and most definitely in nature. It’s for this reason that the intriguing sequence, which begins as 0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55 and so on forever, has fascinated mathematicians, scientists, designers, and artists for centuries.
Leonardo DaVinci, for instance, was known to use the Fibonacci sequence in his masterpieces because the pattern is aesthetically pleasing. Is it a coincidence that the ratio can be seen from a micro to macro scale in all biological systems, and even in inanimate objects? Clearly, there’s much to learn about sacred geometry and inherent order in the universe.
Some theorize that the phi ratio (phi = 1.61803…) is evidence that nature is inherently perfect, and that when mankind strays away from the natural law, sickness and imbalance occur. While the Golden Ratio doesn’t account for every structure or pattern in this world and others, it most certainly is a key player.
You caught me. I am trying to covertly be less feminine and slowly transform into a man via hair product. No one has ever called me out on it, but you've discovered my secret of androgynous power. Man hair product on a woman. How will I go on, knowing that my secret isn't safe anymore?
The Lyrids is a meteor shower that takes place from April 16th to April 26th of this year, with its peak being around April 22nd. The Lyrids meteor shower is named for the constellation Lyra, with it’s radiant point originating from the constellation’s brightest star, Alpha Lyrae, otherwise known as Vega.
Magickal workings that would be appropriate to perform during the Lyrids meteor shower include those having to do with:
Immortality of the soul
It is said that the first lyre ever made was given to Orpheus by Hermes as a bargain. The music produced by this lyre was so great that even inanimate objects could be charmed by it.
“At one point, Orpheus married Eurydice, a nymph. While fleeing from an attack by Aristaeus, she stepped on a snake that bit her, killing her. To reclaim her, Orpheus entered the Underworld, where the music from his lyre charmed Hades. Hades relented and let Orpheus bring Eurydice back, on the condition that he never once look back until outside. Unfortunately, near the very end, Orpheus faltered and looked back, causing Eurydice to be left in the Underworld forever. Orpheus spent the rest of his life strumming his lyre while wandering aimlessly through the land, rejecting all marriage offers from women.”
Spirit work - Aconite (Wolfsbane, Monkshood), Apple, Bay Laurel, Birch, Cedar, Copal, Cypress, Elder, Lavender, Mandrake, Marigold, Mugwort, Mullein, Pomegranate, Thyme, Tobacco, Willow, Wormwood, Yew
Enchanting - *The herb will depend on the type of enchantment you are performing*
Rating: K+ Length: 1.5k+ Warnings: dan swearing but what else is new? Summary: dan realises that he doesn’t actually know how to cook pasta and phil is there to offer a little reassurance because everyone makes mistakes AN: it’s 03:00 and this hasn’t been thoroughly checked, i’m sorry
Y'all: we need Diversity and Representation™ in big budget movies!!!!1!!
Also y'all: Go crazy over Beauty and the Beast (2017), a movie with only TWO people of color and THREE women in a top-billed cast of TWELVE, a movie with only THREE non-white actors playing characters (and two of them are inanimate objects. The only characters played by actors of color are Père Robert, Plumette and Madame de Garderobe). The only gay character only implies he’s gay and no one really talks about it. Everybody else is straight, most of them are played by white actors (even the inanimate objects like wtf, can only white actors do voice overs for furniture??) AND IT OPENS AT $174.75M
MEANWHILE, Power Rangers (2017), a movie with four leads of color, a character that’s on the autism spectrum and actually says he is, an LGBTQ+ character that also says she is, a character that made a terrible choice but wants to redeem herself, a bilingual character with a sick mom and a character that even though he was declared as the leader hE DOESNT BECOME A SELF ABSORBED ASSHOLE WHO THINKS HES THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE TEAM. IT IS SUCH AN ORGANICALLY DIVERSE MOVIE WITH SO MUCH HEART AND ITS SO FUN AND IT HAS ONLY MADE $40.5M
WHAT THE HELL, GUYS??
edit: the intention of this post isn’t really to attack Disney or BatB and I know that not everyone is a fan of the Power Rangers, my point is that here and all over social media we’ve been asking for diversity, and if they gave us this cool new diverse movie, the least we can do is go support it, like we went to support BatB! If they see it’s successful to have diverse characters and actors, lack of diversity in casts (like in the voice cast for BatB) could stop being so notorious.
“Wait, but why did Laila sleep over?” Mutta asked, his head resting on his hand as he turned to Elias in interest.
Elias sat with his ankle resting over one knee, while the rest of the boys were lounging lazily on the couch beside him in the Bakkoush’ living room, doing nothing in particular. Mikael and Even were both occupied with something incredibly interesting on one of their phone screens.
Elias smiled at the memory of Friday night and Saturday morning. They had been constantly texting ever since then.
He shrugged in response to Mutta. “Her friend needed a place to crash and she wanted to keep her company. Also, the folks weren’t home.”
Yousef, noticing Elias’s change in disposition, smiled at Elias before he asked. “So she isn’t mad at you anymore?”
Elias paused, “Don’t think so.”
Adam smirked at Elias. “You seem very happy right now.”
“In other words, he feels whole.” Mikael erupted melodramatically. “He feels excitement. He feels euphoria rushing through his veins. He feels butterflies in his stomach at the very sight of her…..no, at the very thought of her.”
Witchy Real Talk: Technopaganism - What Is It and Why?
From day to day, a lot of us work with tools and supplies that are very specifically traditional. Candles, altars, stones, cards, herbs. Much of paganism and witchcraft is nature oriented, after all. And in many forms of paganism, animism - the belief that even inanimate objects have spirits - is a prominent feature of the belief system. But… what if we started looking at today’s technology… What if, instead of focusing entirely on traditional supplies and tools, we started incorporating, say, computers, cell phones, or even our gaming avatars into our practice?
Pfft! Don’t be silly, Josh! Most of paganism is nature worship. You can’t do that with software!
As it turns out, this is a growing practice. Given the rather futuristic name of “technopagan” in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, some hold the belief that modern technology has just as equal a place in witchcraft and modern paganism as the athame or chalice.
How could that even work?
In large part, technopaganism focuses on combining current technology with pagan practice in order to find a balance between technology and nature. And, honestly, I would argue that most, if not all, modern pagans have begun doing so in small ways. Just hear me out. What are you doing right now in order to learn about the craft? Reading books? Great! How are you reading them? Are you reading the hard copy, or are you reading it in digital format on your Nook, Kindle, or smartphone? What about your other research? If you’re reading this, I can make the assumption that some of your research and exploration of paganism and witchcraft has been online.
Those are just the two most obvious aspects of technopaganism. Am I saying that every modern witch or pagan is technopagan? No. What I’m saying is that many of us have incorporated certain aspects of it into our own practices in order to move forward with the times. And doing so is frankly quite honorable - the gods wouldn’t want us to stagnate.
To further reflect on certain aspects of technopaganism, I’ll break it down based on tools, spells, and even special practices that separate it yet also marries it to paganism as we usually picture it.
Research and Interaction
Before the advent of the Internet, books and meetings with other pagans were the only way that you could really dig into your research or learn about other traditions. This made it somewhat difficult for many to really pursue paganism, as for years, it was a pain to find the appropriate books, and for many, interacting with other pagans was nigh impossible depending upon where they lived. Furthermore, learning about modern traditions from the other side of the pond was far less practical.
The Internet was a huge change made to paganism and the access that could be made to it. From chat rooms to blogs to YouTube and Facebook, witches from all over the world now interact on a daily basis. As a great example, I maintain a blog all about different aspects of witchcraft and paganism, and interact with those who might message me in order to learn from them and to teach what I know. And I grew up in a Christian family. Most of my exploration into witchcraft when I was first getting started was done online.
Some witches have taken a similar approach to what I do, but in a more visual format. The LadyGravedancer, WitchyBear, Wednesday Adams, Creole Witch, Sunshine Morningrae, and Joey Morris are all examples of witches who have turned to YouTube to help teach new witches and experienced witches alike about their paths and traditions, allowing access to Hoodoo, Morriganic path, and Wicca to be easily accessible to many more witches.
Even further is the growth of witchy social media. On Facebook, I’m part of a group of witches that numbers more than 800 worldwide, and we’re always talking to one another, bouncing ideas back and forth, and exploring paths in a friendly environment that I might not have had access to a decade ago.
One of the greatest difficulties I’d had when I first got started in witchcraft was the lack of books on the subject in the area I was in. When I came across bookstores, I had to scour every shelf in the hopes that I might find even one book that pertained to my research. Later on, ebooks began to grow in popularity. When I was finally able to get my hands on a Nook ereader, I’d found that the access I had to books on paganism and witchcraft had increased many-fold. This access increased even further when I began to use my smartphone for reading ebooks. Between apps for Kindle and Nook, and even Google’s all-access books, I was able to build up a significant library digitally that would have taken me decades otherwise.
The Car and the Witch
Modern technology isn’t limited to cell phones and computers. Cars have become such a prevalent part of life that witchcraft and paganism have adapted to incorporate spells of protection for these two-ton chunks of moving metal. In Scott Cunningham’s The Magical Household, he has an entire section dedicated solely to providing protection, luck, comfort, and positive energy into one’s vehicle.
Even the practice of hanging objects on the rear-view mirror stems from pagan roots. Lucky dice, bags of herbs or potpourri, crystals, et cetera. Some witches have even begun incorporating small altars into their cars, either on the dash or kept in the glove compartment as a shadowbox altar. Cleansing a car by smudging or asperging has become common practice, as well. In a way, cars have begun to be seen as an extension of the home, and magic has adapted to reflect this view.
Lasers, Crystals, and Hard Drives
One of the neat little features of technopagan practice is incorporating technology into your tool set. Some are more subtle and used by many witches, while others took me by surprise!
Wands or athames are part of the bread and butter of witchcraft, and it’s difficult to picture an altar without at least one of them, but some pagans with the technological lean have begun replacing the tool with a substitute such as a laser pointer or stylus!
Similarly, the use of electric lighters have begun replacing the role of matches in the practice. While that might not seem like much, there are many traditions that encourage the use of wooden matches because of the more natural aspects these matches hold over an object made of metal or plastic. (I personally use wooden matches over lighters for the natural aspect, the aesthetic, the feeling of striking the match, and the fragrance - matches rarely impart any kind of odor to candles and incense, but lighters sometimes do, especially kerosene lighters such as the Zippo brand which will turn sandalwood incense into a rather sickening and bitter scent).
Witches the world over will expound upon the benefits of keeping a book of shadows (and some witches will even say that you can’t be a witch without them - something I wholeheartedly disagree with, but to each their own). For many of us, notebooks and journals that have been handwritten and lovingly crafted to match up with our own personal aesthetics serve as our grimoires and books of spells. Techno-witches often will keep their books of shadows on their hard drives, writing and saving in a word processor. (This is something I might recommend to those who need to practice discreetly - when I first got started, my book of shadows was kept on my computer in a little folder convincingly labeled as “Fan Fiction.”)
Similarly, graphical representations of altars may be kept on a computer! I’ve seen some of these altars take the form of live wallpapers or screen savers - a creative use of these applications!
When we begin to look at the computer itself, it gets really interesting! I’ll start with the simple part. Quartz is believed to be particularly beneficial to technology, absorbing and cleansing any negative energies that may cause the computer to malfunction or pick up a virus. As such, many witches will keep quartz on or near their devices. Technopagans may take it a step further, creating charms and spells specifically for protecting their computers, their online accounts - both financial and otherwise - and for gaming avatars if they have any.
This is a common sight on Tumblr, and is part of the bread and butter of technological witchcraft: emoji spells and charms! For some, there is power to stringing certain emoji’s together along with a written spell or charm. They will then like or reblog in order to charge and send out the spell. While I don’t identify with that, there are witches out there who will swear by such spells. Other, similar spells I’ve seen include sharing gifs of sage smudging in order to cleanse one’s blog or Facebook (this is one I do identify with, as it provides a lovely visualization that I’ve seen do wonders for my pages), and uploading sigils for various purposes. Part of the draw to these spells is not only the prevalence of online witching, but also because likes, shares, and reblogs are believed to lend energy to such spells. With so many witches proliferating the spell, it allows the spell to constantly feed itself in the working. (Once again, I don’t necessarily share this optimistic belief, because if you send a “baneful spell” and regret doing so, you can’t easily reverse it because it has developed a life of its own - something very dangerous when you consider the power thought-forms can have.)
With the change in culture over the centuries, as I have often said, the gods must have changed as well, because they’ve never been ones for stagnation. Sports have done the same thing, moving into the realm of video gaming. Competitive games such as League of Legends, SMITE, and DOTA, have become recognized by large names in sports such as ESPN, and feature many teams of gamers now competing in world competitions - televised and otherwise - for a living. Some of these more witchy gamers have spells meant to protect their avatars and give them the skill and teamwork needed for victory. And some gamers will even dedicate their avatars to a particular god or goddess in order to bring honor to their deity! (And I will admit, this is something I love the idea of!)
((A side note for my fellow pagan gamers, SMITE is a MOBA which allows you to play as a god or goddess from real world pantheons in the ultimate war of the gods. It is a blast to play, and now that they’ve begun releasing the Celtic pantheon, it’s gotten even more interesting (and I can attest to the awesomeness that the Morrigan brings to the game), so definitely give it a try!))
Some technopagans have also incorporated other traditions into their paths. An example of this which I use is the practice of having a wallpaper with a dragon on it. So long as the dragon is not looking directly at the viewer (as if it is looking out of the computer), it will protect your computer from viruses! As a lover of dragons, and as a witch who has incorporated this little aspect into his path, it perhaps comes to no surprise that I’ve got a little collection of such dragon wallpapers!
The Magic of the Mobile Device
The examples don’t stop there! Especially among younger witches, smart phones have become an extension of the online world. Computers with the capabilities of laptops, but small enough to fit into a pocket. Much of what I’ve talked about above applies to phones, from storing a book of shadows to having little charms and spells of protection. However, there are certain nifty aspects phones often have for the technological witch.
First is the ease of access to music. For witches who don’t feel particularly musically inclined, smart phones and iPods have become a useful way of bringing music to their rites or spells. (I’ll even admit that despite being a musician, I do play music from Enya or Clannad or even Stevie Nicks during my rites!)
Second is the growth of using mobile devices for divination. There are hundreds of thousands of apps out there, and there are just as many dedicated to tarot, rune reading, astrology, and other witchy topics. Some apps will include a reading each day, or will allow you to perform readings for others on programmable spreads using digital cards.
The Balance of Nature
With all of this emphasis on technology and Internet, it might sound as if technopaganism is losing its pagan. On the contrary! Many such witches actually encourage maintaining a healthy balance. I’ve read blogs and forums where technopagans will talk about how they’ll do both online rites and offline rites, how they maintain two sets of books, and how they’ll take a hiatus from technology in order to ground and restore balance by spending time in nature.
In my exploration of the technopagan path, I’ve discovered that like any other path or tradition, these witches are all about taking life by the horns and making their lives and the lives of those around them easier. However, they’ve found technology to be a useful tool for doing so and saw the magical potential of these tools. This doesn’t make them any less witchy than the green witch, Wiccan, or Celtic pagan. Their magic is just as powerful as ours, and is just as deserving of respect as any other witch’s!
So give it a try and see what sticks. You may be surprised as to what you find works for you!