James Potter: Very… very eager, but trying really… really hard to restrain himself. Knows how to do fun things with his tongue… has had a lot of practice. All in all… he’s what people like to describe as “fun”… 8/10
Sirius Black: Knows how to adapt. Can pretty much match anyone’s kissing style, but likes deep, intense kissing the most… Also likes biting and hickeys. As talented as he is pretty. Down for basically anything… An enjoyable experience all the way around. 11/10
Remus Lupin: Nervous. Starts off slow… then kisses like it’s the last time he’ll ever kiss someone because he always feels like it’s the last time anyone will ever want to kiss him… 6/10 when he’s nervous… 9/10 when he relaxes and let’s go.
Peter Pettigrew: Sweats a lot… too much tongue… 4/10
Lily Evans: Expert kisser, knows her shit… at least as far as technicalities go… but lacks spontaneity. Get’s flustered when she doesn’t see something coming like James’ tongue tricks… also gets distracted easily (”SHIT! That’s due tomorrow!”)… Overall, needs some work. 6.5/10
Frank Longbottom: Handles you like you’re made of glass… very gentle… very sweet… enjoys kissing the spot just beneath your ear. Hates biting because he’s worried he’ll hurt you. Often stops to stare or chat. Worships the ground you walk on… 8/10 for kissing… 20/10 for making you feel like a goddess.
Alice Longbottom: Kinky as fuck. 9/10
Dorcas Meadowes: Kinkier than fuck. Kisses like she owns your ass. Also hella gay. 10/10
Marlene McKinnon: Also also hella gay… less kinky. Uses a lot of tongue… but does it right. 9/10
Mary Macdonald: Mary sue to the max… every kiss is like a reenactment of “The Notebook”. Disney-esque. 7/10
Regulus Black: Untrusting. Tends to panic if things go too quick… or too slow… or not exactly how he planned it. Perfectionist… and a bit of a control freak… doesn’t really know how to adapt to other kissing styles. 4.5/10
Narcissa Malfoy: Reserved… until between the sheets, then she will eat you alive. Mother fucking queen. Savage. Always tops. 10/10
Lucius Malfoy: Fun to look at… Terrible kisser. -5 stars. Two thumbs way down… would not recommend…. 0/10……………. alright… 2/10 for being pretty… Also… submissive af.
Bellatrix Lestrange: Will rip your goddam lip off. 0/10…. unless you’re into that.
Fenrir Greyback: Will rip your goddam head off. -54/10
- Was a bully
- Jinxed people when he was bored and laughed at it
- Was totally okay with Remus being a werewolf
- Became an unregistered animagus so that his werewolf friend wouldn’t have to suffer through the full moon alone
- Realized within a few years what a douche he was to people
- Changed for the better
- Loved his wife and his son with all his heart and wanted only what was best for them
- Joined the Order of the Phoenix as soon as he left Hogwarts
- Faced Lord Voldemort without a wand, in hope of buying Lily and Harry time, knowing that he stood no chance of surviving
- Thought muggle-borns were inferior
- Called his only friend “mudblood”
- Became a Death Eater
- Told Voldemort about the prophecy, bc he was 100% okay with killing an infant
- When he got to know that it was Lily’s son, he asked Voldemort to spare HER, not caring how she would feel to have her son and husband killed
- Bullied Harry simply because he was James’ son
- Bullied Neville until he became the poor boy’s WORST FEAR (that same poor boy who witnessed his parents get tortured to insanity by Bellatrix, yet SNAPE was his worst fear.)
- Shamed Hermione for her teeth until she cried. And then she permanently changed them.
- Threatened to kill Trevor when Neville failed to do a potion
- Used his position of power as a teacher to make students’ lives miserable
- Told everyone Lupin was a werewolf, and intended to get him fired
- Knew that Sirius didn’t tell Voldemort the Potters’ location (I could explain how but I can’t bother now) but still wanted him to get a dementor’s kiss bc of what happened when they were 16
- Helped Harry in the end
But sure, go ahead and tell me Snape was a better person than James.