eurghhgh

“isn’t this the name of the third one” title: check
proper young man who allies with jack: check
not actually proper young woman, empowering™: check 
proper romantic subplot: check
zombies: check
barbossa feat. a massive wig: check
~magic~ tattooed woman: check
jack about to be executed: check
the fucking monkey: check

……….johnny depp: check
cringe level: 9000+