Tbh the best way I manage my adhd to keep my room clean is to just. Have baskets/bins everywhere. A dirty laundry basket and a not-quite-dirty-I-can-wear-this-again laundry basket (both within throwing distance of where I normally dress and undress), a snacks basket by my chair, a bowl by the door for pins/rings/bracelets, multiple trashcans in strategic locations, etc
When things have a place to go, and that place is conveniently located near where I would otherwise drop the things, I can take advantage of the principle of Might As Well because putting it in the Correct place takes exactly as much energy as it would to just drop it wherever
“Might as well put this in the trashcan that’s two feet away from me,” “Might as well drop this shirt in the laundry basket by my feet,” “Might as well put the bag of chips back into the snack basket next to my chair,” etc etc etc
Doesn’t help with everything (there are currently several things around my room that could probably be put away) but it does help with the big offenders like clothes and trash
on I visited a brick-and-mortar, “real life” queer space (they
self-describe as queer) and I’d just like to reassure everyone again
that the nasty anti-queer, anti-inclusion infighting so typical of
this website is generally not representative of reality in
queer/LGBTQ+ organizations. This place had, among other things, zines
about all the supposedly ~controversial issues like respectability
politics, cissexism and biphobia from cis LG people, gender policing,
assimilationism in the guise of rights, ace and aro exclusion from
the community, intersectionality of being LGBTQ+ with other
oppressions and how it creates its own issues, and so on. None of it was treated as controversial at
all; on the contrary, you could talk about it with the premise that
these are all real problems having already been accepted.
know they’re a fringe group. Like truscum, TERFs and other
essentialists, their “solution” then is to make more of a racket
and engage in more harassment that they try to pass off as a good cause (supposedly safeguarding the community from whoever they imagine to be Evil Straight Interlopers that month).
But outside their little jerk circle?
Inclusion is the norm. Don’t
I know that policing ableist language can often create too close a focus on saying the right words instead of doing the right things to help/support/accommodate mentally ill, ND, and disabled people, but every time i see someone say that lacking empathy makes you evil (or that having empathy is necessary for you to be moral) because they don’t know the difference/can’t be bothered to differentiate between empathy and compassion, it’s like a punch to the fucking gut, and i want followers to know i didn’t choose this hill to die on just to be pedantic. it’s upsetting. it feels dehumanizing. and in this current political climate, well-meaning people are doing it goddamn everywhere.
People keep asking me to watch and provide commentary on Gw/yneth Paltr*w’s Netflix show Goop/lab, but every time I try I have to stop after about ten minutes because I can feel the blood pounding behind my eyes from how tight I’m clenching my jaw.
honestly if you believe there are certain bodily prerequisites you need to meet to be a real wo/man, you might as well call yourself a homophobe as well as a transphobe. bc the way we understand binary sexgender today ties directly into straight ideology, namely that there are two “opposite” sexes (constituted solely by genitalia) that are destined to unite and become One, producing offspring and thus reproducing the same society that made them.
any politic that claims to support lgbtq+ ppl but still reifies sexgender as binary and immutable ultimately keeps in place a foundational element of heterosexism as we know it
Separatism brings ease onto my soul. I no longer rack my brain wondering what is wrong with men. I no longer lament over why they won’t change. I no longer waste my energy trying to converse with them, have them in my life or change them. I no longer try to appeal to their humanity for the sake of women (spoiler alert, men have no humanity and are morally bankrupt).
I look back and see how much energy being a reformist took out of me. I felt so depressed, stuck in a loop, so hopeless. There was no end point to feminism, it felt like endless attempts to fix men and failing only to try again. It was exhausting. I hated it.
I look at other women and see a spring of life in them.
Separatism gives women something they have never had in other forms of feminism, it gives them an answer. In the here and now, something doable and independent. Something that works. Most of all it gives us peace knowing we don’t have to waste lifetimes trying to get semen dispensers to change. What a relief.