Sarah is allergic to strawberries. As soon as she puts them in her mouth, her face swells up and she gets hives. As far as she knows it’s not life-threatening, but she knows any food allergy has the potential to be dangerous and life-threatening and is so is careful.
Sally is also allergic to strawberries, and has the same symptoms.
Sarah informs her friends she is allergic to strawberries so they can stop using them in shared food and preparing shared food with the same utensils. Some of them even stop eating strawberries too (or, at least, stop eating them around her), so she is more comfortable. Sarah researches places she can eat out that will take care with her allergy, and chooses restaurants who agree they can accommodate her, or who do not use strawberries in any of their cooking. She also carries her Epi-pen, just in case cross-contamination takes place.
Sally, on the other hand, goes into restaurants specifically advertising only strawberry desserts, orders a dessert, and makes a huge fuss when she gets sick. She takes to social media, the local newspapers, everywhere, to tell people how terrible this restaurant is for not specifically accommodating her personal allergy. She goes back frequently to insult and harass specific staff. Some staff have even quit because of her. Sally says it is her personal right to have her allergy accommodated in every single place she feels like eating! She posts pictures of herself all swollen and ill everywhere (and sometimes, from in hospital!) and blames the restaurant and the staff for her discomfort.
Be like Sarah, not like Sally.
Control your own consumption of content, don’t enter tags you don’t like, and don’t harass creators that make things you don’t like because you’ve decided you have to have the entire internet cater to your personal likes and comforts.
The question you asked about the Garlfied post: I would read the SHIT out of a story about a starving artist making a deal with an eldritch horror from beyond and accidently ending up getting some otherworldly dick.
okay so here is my pitch
it would be called Lionel James Wants To Be Famous
leo is a young man who, as the title suggests, would really like to be famous. and he has a lot of ideas about how he could like to be famous. but unfortunately for leo, he has approximately no talent, and not even in an interesting wiseau kind of a way.
he tried making a webcomic, which went approximately nowhere. he tried making flash animations, back when that was a thing. he returned to the well of webcomics. he tried stand-up. he tried self-publishing young adult novels. he made two episodes of a podcast. his latest venture has been an attempt to make it as a famous youtuber.
but he fucking sucks. not even in the fun way that some people suck. if he went viral for being shitty, he would be ecstatic. he would sell t-shirts celebrating his own humiliation. there is just nothing even remotely interesting about leo. there is not a creative bone in his body. he has no vision or drive. he is the guy who thinks he’s funny because he’s really good at repeating stand-up routines he saw on comedy central. he’s just. he’s not great.
so he does what any young man with minimal ambition that exceeds his even more minimal talent would do, and he summons a demon. which takes the form of a cat. a very round and fluffy black cat, with red eyes.
he names it taft.
taft the cat is a photogenic cheese-loving internet sensation. leo monetizes everything. there are shirts. there are ad-covered videos. taft gets their own comic book. sponsorships. leo gets to go on talk shows with his ridiculous fat cat from hell.
here is the thing about taft: they have been doing this for a long time. artists are easy marks. they’ve never taken the form of a lolcat before, but generally, acting as a muse is a quick way to get a soul. because sooner than later, an artist will realize how unfulfilling it is, how much it sucks to know that all their success is actually because of their demon muse, etc etc.
obviously getting artists to kill themselves due to lack of creative fulfillment isn’t exactly nice, but, demon.
leo, however, fucking loves this arrangement. because leo is not an artist. he just wants to be treated like one. and with dawning horror, this hideous shadowterror comes to realize that they are going to be stuck with this asshole for a really long time. and no matter what they do to try to make leo uncomfortable, or renege on the deal… it never works. he just rolls with it.
taft must now try to find a way to make living with an obnoxious manchild into something tolerable, and so far their plan is 90% ‘annoy the everliving shit out of him’ with a 10% side of ‘well, at least he’s not bad-looking’.
Don’t you think it’s beautiful that Rainbow Rowell wrote a book about fangirls, who write fanfiction about Simon Snow and Baz Pitch and now there’s this entire fandom on the internet that loves these guys? Because somehow - wow
and here i bring you yet another kara/lena au that nobody asked for but that i’m sharing with y’all anyways because what else do i have to do with my life at 12:00 am.
james wins two tickets for the upcoming lakers game in national city but comes to find out that he can’t go because he has another important thing to do that night (i don’t know what thing exactly but the point is he can’t go), so he’s left with two tickets for the lakers and he’s not sure who to give them to, so of course he goes to kara: “i know you don’t like basketball, but seeing it live is such a different experience, you’ll enjoy it!”
problem is that kara doesn’t know who to ask to go with her, alex has a date night, winn is not going anywhere near a basketball stadium (highschool trauma), j’onn says he has no time for games. lena is one of her first options, but main reason she doesn’t want to ask her is fear of rejection. she’s a ceo! she probably has no interest in spending a friday night with her.
alex tells her she’s being ridiculous, lena’s her friend and she’ll enjoy spending time with her regardless of the activity, she pratically drives kara to l-corp so she can ask lena to go with her.
lena knows nothing about basketball, for a second she actually confuses it with beisball, but kara looks so cute and how can she say not to that face? so she agrees and kara pulls her into the biggest hug.
because lena has never, ever gone to a basketball game she shows up to kara’s apartment with a tight dress and high heels, her makeup on point as always and a big ass valentino black bag, meanwhile kara’s wearing jeans and a sweatshirt, maybe even a snapback if you want the complete Gay™
lena is so confused the entire time, she watches as the players pass the ball to each other and hears the crowd roar when they make a triple. kara is no better, but she at least knows the basics because james explained them to her prior, so she gets into it after the first ten minutes, she claps with the audience, screams in chorus with the other people. she asks lena if she’s having fun, if she wants to leave but lena says no and kara probably buys her popcorn or something, popcorn that by the way kara ends up eating.
halftime rolls in and lena takes the opportunity to answer all the messages that are unread on her phone, “i’m so sorry i swear i’ll only take a minute,” kara smiles and tells her to go ahead.
lena is answering to one of her business partners when she hears kara choke on the popcorn and everyone around them whistling and clapping, so she turns to see what is wrong to find kara looking at the enormous screen in the middle of the stadium with a pink blush on her cheeks and wide eyes. the camera is focusing both of them with a heart around their silhouettes and “kiss cam!” written on pink letters just above their heads.
everyone in the stadium starts cheering for them, “kiss! kiss! kiss!” over and over again, the damn camera doesn’t seem to find anybody else as interesting and though kara wants to laugh and write an enormous sign that reads that hey, they’re just friends! she catches the way lena’s heartbeat speeds up and how her breathing becomes uneven and okay, maybe a little kiss won’t hurt, after all they’ve become close after the recent events and what’s wrong with maybe platonically kissing your friend on the lips? a little peck and that’s it.
however, once they turn around to look at each other kara notices just how green lena’s eyes are and how pale her skin looks and also how her red lips part to meet hers and when they finally kiss the screaming and whistling, all the noise around them disappears and kara can only focus on how soft lena’s is and how her lipstick tastes like strawberry and oh, god, when she feels her tongue caressing her bottom lip kara is sure she’s going to pass out.
they’re both a little breathless when they break apart, a young lady sitting next to them gives kara a high five and then the second half of the game starts but kara can’t focus on anything anymore because she still tastes lena on her tongue and she realizes that shit, she wants to kiss her again. and again. and again.
the lakers win by three points and lena’s driver is already waiting for them outside the stadium when the game ends, but the crowd is huge and she fears she’ll lose lena in the sea of people so she interwines their fingers together and walks them towards the exit ignoring the warmness that goes through her entire body at the feeling of lena’s hand against her own.
the car ride is kind of awkward, neither of them speak, they’re on each side of the car struggling on how to break the silence. lena sometimes catches kara looking and her and viceversa until it’s too much and kara blurts out: “i really liked it, the game. and also kissing you” and lena laughs before sheepishly nodding and saying “me too. i mean i liked kissing you, i didn’t understand the game at all.”
they make out until they get to kara’s apartmet. (｡♥‿♥｡)
before kara falls asleep she receives a message from lena that says “thank you, i had a great time.” with maybe a smiley face and two hearts and kara hides her face on her pillow.
the next morning when she wakes up and goes to work, everyone’s looking at her and whispering behind her back and kara’s afraid she might have a mustard stain on her white cardigan (it wouldn’t be the first time that happened). and then james sees her and before she can even say hello and ask what the hell is going on with everyone, he motions to the screens where a video of her and lena kissing is projecting, the entire internet has gone wild about it. the video that was originally uploaded to youtube has for title “lena luthor kisses cute stranger @ bball game.” kara wants to die on the spot.