‘The Buddha’s teaching is all about understanding suffering - its origins, its cessation, and the path to its cessation. When we contemplate suffering, we find that we are contemplating desire, because desire and suffering are the same thing.
Desire can be compared to fire. if we grasp fire, what happens? Does it lead to happiness? If we say: “Oh, look at that beautiful fire! Look at the beautiful colours! I love red and orange; they’re my favourite colours,” and then grasp it, we would find a certain amount of suffering entering the body. And then if we were to contemplate the cause of that suffering we would discover it was as a result of having grasped that fire. On that information, we would hopefully, then let the fire go. Once we let the fire go then we know that it is something not to be attached to. This does not mean we have to hate it, or put it out. We can enjoy fire, can’t we? It is nice having a fire, it keeps the room warm, but we do not have to burn ourselves in it.’
Today we watched the latest pony episode, and we found it very fascinating because it dealt with the topic of fan wars. Which provides perfect timing to share some positive vibes about sharing what you like.
If you observe any fan argument from the outside, it always comes down to people trying to validate what they like, because they feel if someone doesn’t line up with what they love, that’s an attack to their ego:
“Superman is much better than Batman and would kick his sorry butt all around Gotham”
“BS! Batman is a million times better than Superman because he is human and doesn’t rely on powers!”
What is being said here is “MY SUPERHERO IS BETTER THAN YOURS”, which boils down to two stubborn goats, and what they are really saying is “I AM TRYING TO CONVINCE YOU THAT I AM BETTER THAN YOU, MY OPINIONS MATTER MORE, MY TASTE IS BETTER” .
If you are trying to convince someone that you are better than them, there is a “feeling small issue there!"
When you realize that, you earn immunity to those comments *insert ZELDA open chest SFX here*. Still, you want a verbal shield? “GOOD FOR YOU!” or “THAT IS FASCINATING”. It never failed me to end the no-sense.
NEEDING to CONVINCE = NEEDY, and NEEDY = ICKY for you and everybody else.
Wars over shipping X with Y! , over how an artist doesn’t deserve popularity over another.. Even claiming "romantic ownership” over a fictional character and bashing anyone who defies that .. for the love of G..
Over the years, I found simple mindsets that make this feel “right”, because they will both ADD to you instead of TAKING from you. If you want to give it a go, here is how I roll it:
1. If you don’t like it, leave it. yeah, haha, very simple, but not always obvious when it is YOUR LIFE (specially when a core value is challenged).
I may profoundly disagree with some the values that are transmitted through someone else’s works, but I don’t need to educate them in “right and wrong”. Giving negative attention requires a lot of energy!your energy is precious! don’t waste it!
When you’re cold, you get something warm and wear warm clothes.. when it’s too hot, you seek ice cream and refreshment.. it’s our nature, we seek what feels good and make it all better.
Sometimes people bask in an argument because they choose misery over uncertainty.
By uncertainty, I mean going on a little journey to find something better.When you let the “meeeeh” thing go, you are left with a void for a little while, even if it is just a minute. what if you don’t find anything? what if what you find is worse? ayayay…
Realize this is a , risk-less place to to learn to have a little courage! when you’ll see it works for you, you can branch it to bigger stuff, like not conforming to the “meeeh” workplace or college you are in right now, and going for something that is better for you!
Again, being a fan can be an incredible, empowering life experience, if you make it that way.
2. You don’t like it? I am curious, why so? If someone hates our drawings, ideas or videos, I find fascinating to learn to know why. I always take those answers with zero judgement, and sometimes there are brilliant critiques hidden inside those gut reactions. Hell! I want the critiques! how else I’m supposed to grow if I don’t have any contrast?
It lets you know the other person better (or your audience), even if you don’t agree with them, if you realize that it is all about them, not about you. Worst case scenario? it makes no sense and it makes you laugh, and believe you me! some of the nut-job comments we get are comedy gold!
In conclusion, don’t even bother to convince anyone, instead, try to enjoy your experience and connect with others, you are all worthy and valuable. Learning to deal with critique can add massively to your life.
If you choose to give this a try, I sincerely hope it makes you feel good. It does for me!