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Endstille - The one I hate

Although Endstille`s lyrics are about the First and Second World War they don`t belong to the NSBM-Scene and are NO(!) nazis.

They dissociate themselves completely from that scene and abominate Nazis.

I never would post any NAZI-BULLSHIT!

Dating Baekhyun Would Include...

Originally posted by sehunlays

christmas with you

; tell me… tell me how you’ve managed to keep my heart in your own. tell me how you’ve managed to make my heart beat so fast at the sound of your melodic voice. tell me how you’ve managed to make me love you so much. tell me… tell me how.

boyfriend? sehun, kyungsoo, junmyeon, baekhyun, ?

masterlist // get to know me

  • hugs and kisses are never ever going to lack or be lost in your relationship with him because he’s secretly rlly clingy and we all know he won’t ever get enough with just one or a hundred kisses
  • lil fluffy cotton ball that likes to play games and pranks on you especially ones that end up with you kissing him
  • you’ll tell him you’re gonna kill him, but in reality, you just want more of it
  • hey, don’t expect sleep to come with this relationship, you can’t have everything in life
  • baekhyun being left cold whenever he goes to the airport because you steal all his hoodies since he’ll be leaving you once again and you’ll miss him more than last time
  • gifts from the countries baekhyun’s been to, most especially food and delicacies
  • both of you finishing all the food that he brought back in a day
  • junmyeon and sehun calling you pigs, but you know baekhyun’s killer abs are enough for the both of you to slay them
  • chanyeol gawking at the sight of your boyfriend’s abs
  • throwing stuff at chanyeol for staring at baekhyun
  • “HE’S MINE, CHANYEOL. BACK OFF.”
  • baekhyun would pretend to not notice, but the asshole knows you’re thirsty for him, and it fuels him with annoying pride that you always regret whenever he brings it up during arguments
  • calling baekhyun, so he could sing to you with his amazing af voice
  • ALWAYS HUGGING, CUDDLING, AND KISSING BAEKHYUN CUS HE’S SO ADORABLE AND CUTE
  • baekhyun whining everytime you do it, but he loves it cus he’s clingy too
  • laughing at baekhyun whenever he plays lol cus he probably always dies at the first round
  • baek tryna act like it didn’t happen, but you’ll never forget it and use them as blackmail in the future
  • probably already using them within the next two hours because this idiot gets himself into lots of useless ‘fights’
  • tickle fights because baekhyun and you both are vulnerable to tickles
  • having a cuddle session cus why not??? he’s byun baekhyun, the most cuddly (and clingiest) person on earth
  • staring at him while he sleeps
  • baekhyun staring at you while you sleep
  • staring at each other cus you both can’t believe you’re together
  • both of you thinking it was pure luck and fate that brought you together
  • both of you thanking the heavens for bringing you two together
  • probably laughing after that cus it’s way too cheesy for the both of you idiots
  • baekhyun’s dog is also probably the smartest between the three of you
  • hating baekhyun when he doesn’t wake up on time and you having to rush him
  • him ending up leaving with his shirt half buttoned up and his hair still wet and tangled
  • probably leads to some extra intimate time in bed
  • baekhyun going totally daddy mode on you, turning you on
  • quickies are your favorites, the adrenaline rush to finish on time before he gets late makes you both chase after it and enjoy the high at the end
  • still taking a really long time kissing him
  • goodbye because you know you’ll miss the beagle once he leaves for work
  • “BAEKHYUN, COME HOME ALREADY AND CUDDLE WITH ME”
  • “i haven’t even left yet, jagiya”
  • “buT BABE, I MISS YOU ALREADY”
  • “idiots,” baekhyun’s dog thinks to himself
  • after enduring a long day without your other half, he finally comes home and you drag him to your bed to cuddle and sleep together
  • but ofc, it’s baek and there is no such thing as sleep with him, so you both end up talking about rlly deep stuff such as your personal problems, fears, and the future
  • both of you supporting each other emotionally, as you hold each other in your arms
  • you can’t cry even with all your mixed emotions because baekhyun’s there, and he’s holding you in his arms, and you can’t help but enjoy the moment
  • you finally realize why you two are together and it isn’t because dumb and dumber go together, but because baekhyun and you just fit well together
  • and you couldn’t help but leave a gentle sweet kiss on his soft lips before you bid the night and your problem away, as you await for another day in the arms of byun baekhyun

I really wish movie writers would stop writing anorexic girls as the cool, mysterious little fairy girl. Like seriously. Anorexia does not suddenly make you interesting. Do you want to know what the reality of anorexia is?

  • no-one wanting to hang out with you because people get fucking fed up of watching you avoid food
  • not wanting to go out because you’re scared there will be food there
  • hair falling out
  • nails going yellow and breaking
  • skin looking and feeling like paper and growing more little hairs
  • always being cold, from the inside and out
  • weak bones and weak muscles, not being able to exercise and, if you do, extreme lightheadedness and the posibility of passing out
  • you can literally feel your heart and lungs straining, I can’t explain it but you can feel your body shutting down
  • becoming an obscenely good liar “I already ate” “I had [insert food here] earlier” “don’t worry, I’m sorting it our” “I’m fine” “I can’t be anorexic, I love food too much”
  • your vision going
  • no-one being able to talk to you properly, giving you odd looks and whispering about you when they think you can’t see
  • not being able to move normally because you’re so weak
  • any amount of food making you feel disgusting and bloated and like you’re going to throw up
  • acid reflux, your stomach starts digesting itself
  • this fucks up your vocal chords, and for a singer, that’s rough
  • constantly checking food labels for calorie counts and looking at a normal 400 calorie meal is like someone saying “look at that sheer cliff face! Go climb it with your bare hands”
  • sunken eyes, chapped lips
  • always tired, falling asleep in classes
  • never being able to concentrate, can’t learn anything at school
  • your parents constantly worried, more fights, more stress in the house, they blame each other, hearing them crying when you’re meant to be asleep
  • siblings falling behind on their school work because they’re stressed out and worried about you
  • you feeling even worse and wanting to be normal but you’re convinced you can’t be normal because you think your body is differnt to everyone elses and you physically cannot eat as much as other people
  • losing all of your friends
  • knowing you’re going to die but convincing yourself you’ll stop before that happens but, on the other hand, not knowing if you want to prevent that inevitable end
  • still not seeing food in a normal way years later, just being able to override those feelings

Anorexia is not pretty. It is not cool. It is not mysterious. It is an illness, it breaks you down until you are nothing but your anorexia. It takes over everything. Every single aspect of your life. Until you’re left with nothing but your own existence. And then it takes that. My parents told me they were preparing for the day when they’d come in to wake me up for school and they wouldn’t be able to. Those two years were the worst time of my life, when I try and think of them, all I can think of is pain and crying. Even writing this now is making me upset. AND IT NEVER GOES AWAY. I will live with this fear of food until the day I die. Granted, I can ignore it for the most part, but it’s always there. I will always check calorie counts, I will always try and monitor what I eat but I can do it normally now. 

Please, PLEASE stop glorifying this disease. It’s not the fashionable, mysterious girl. It’s pain and lonliness and anger. People need to understand that.

the GazettE - UNDYING (Kanji + English)

UNDYING

Sleep…Count me down…Again
I won’t arise from this

黒き理念  残された唯一  禍いと 廻る未来
不透明な事実指し  何を信じ 何願う

この空を埋め尽くす不祥の影
永遠に羽を広げて輪を描く

7 6 5 4 3 2 1
「ズレる思想」「報いと離別」「絞首台」「願いと 未来 」
「禁句の圧力」「潰れた夢」「背信」

I deny all of it
黒 に塗れ 死と踊り さぁ終われ
[Count me down…]
[Sleep…Count me down]
[Count me down…Again]

何も聞え無いように叫んだ
俺は変われたか?
今も翳る空に何を見た?
心が潰れたまま

今更  沸き出す真は闇へ葬れた

暴虎馮河
煩悩に塗れ這う
嘯く眼は邪の成れの果て
神すら化かし嘲笑う    

永遠を描く空がただ悲しく

Life, don’t change my fate
God, entomb my hate

言霊と消えて行く心が
終わりを見ても
許されぬ願いに夢を見た
この眼は今もまだ 

流転する罪の底で溺れてる



UNDYING

Sleep…Count me down…Again
I won’t arise from this  

The Dark philosophy that is left behind for a calamity twirling future
Where the hope in beliefs lead to opaque facts  

That sky that is covered by the shadow of many disgraces
Eternally draws a circle to open wings

 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
「Misplaced thoughts」「Retribution and Separation」「Gallows」「Desire and Future」「Pressure of lame words」「Useless dreams」「Betrayal」

I deny all of it
At the end, we are stained in black to dance with death
[Count me down…]
[Sleep…Count me down]
[Count me down…Again] 

I cried as anything was heard
Have I changed?
Now, what was seen in the clouded sky?
While my heart was becoming useless 
Darkness started to gush out the heart that was consigned to oblivion too late 

Foolhardy Courage
Crawl stained with sins
The exaggeration, eyes of the wicked and mere shadow of the past you are the result*
Delusional, ridicules even God 

The skies are sad to draw the eternity 

Life, don’t change my fate
God, entomb my hate 

A heart that disappears with the soul of language*
Looking at the end
Still have that viewpoint
In my dreams were that wish was forgiven 

Drowning at the bottom of my vicissitudes crimes



Notes: Please, keep in mind that english is not my first language, therefore, I wouldn’t recomend tattoing this as 100% correct lol
Parts with * are marked bc I wasnt sure about smthng.

Thanks to @deathlism for giving me a pic of her booklet so I could type the Kanji <3
    

the if-then-alt au
  • root knows shaw. knows the look in her eyes when she steps forward and locks her eyes on the button
  • “sameen, if you even think–”
  • shaw still whips around with “for god’s sake–”
  • still rolls her eyes
  • still moves in for the kiss
  • but root fucking decks her
  • tbt to mors praematura
  • she yells at fusco to grab her and goes for the button
  • root doesn’t throw a great punch, so shaw’s not down for long
  • just long enough
  • she sees root take a bullet once, twice, three times
  • sees her run out of ammo
  • sees her toss the empty gun aside, make some quip to martine that shaw can’t hear
  • she’d told gen, years ago, that she doesn’t feel fear. she just isn’t wired for it
  • now she thinks she might’ve been wrong
  • the elevator’s moving now. she can’t see root anymore but she hears the last shot ring out out
  • she goes completely still after that. completely cold. completely calm and numb
  • just like she did in a car accident so many years ago
  • they’re all silent aside from john’s labored breathing
  • they get him back to the subway, assess the damage, stabilize him
  • shaw and fusco leave harold fussing over him and double back to the stock exchange
  • it’s swarming with cops and feds
  • fusco provides a distraction long enough for shaw to slip through a side door
  • she makes her way back to The room
  • there’s not a sign of anyone
  • there’s blood, though. a whole lot of it
  • drag marks. some bloody boot prints. but no people
  • no root
  • she’s ice cold
  • she gets back to the subway and looks finch dead in the eye
  • tells him she’s going after her
  • finch is trying to be rational. they need to regroup, they need a lead, they’ll find root, they will, but they can’t risk losing anyone else
  • shaw whips around on her heel and marches out into the street. she finds the nearest security camera and stares it down
  • “if you can see me, samaritan can too. that means you’ve got about 30 seconds to help me find her. she’s the interface, right? you know where she is, you want her back too. time to think fast”
  • it takes about 15 seconds for her phone to buzz
  • it’s the name of the mayor of maple: leslie thompson
  • she doesn’t wait for john. doesnt tell finch or fusco
  • just steals a car and goes
  • she tails leslie all throughout the festival, and as soon as she’s alone catches up to her, holds her at gunpoint
  • very coldly tells her they’re going to have a chat
  • she takes her to the local cemetery (no cameras there)
  • “got a few questions for you, ma’am. give me straight answers or this is your last stop. understood?”
  • leslie nods vigorously. she’s terrified
  • shaw knows how to spot a liar, and this woman is giving her the truth. a brunette carried into the factory just a few hours prior
  • she leaves leslie in the cemetery, trembling
  • breaks into the carrow factory herself
  • she doesn’t know much about the tech she’s seeing, but she knows enough to deduce that it’s got samaritan written all over it
  • she grabs one of the neural implants (harold might want a look, and root when they find her)
  • she finds the girl
  • the decidedly-not-root girl
  • it’s a dead end
  • still, she’s packing a decent amount of explosives and in the mood to watch a place like this burn
  • she throws the girl over her shoulder, sack-of-potatoes style
  • sets some charges, peaces out, and lights the building up behind them
  • that should set samaritan back a step or two
  • she calls finch from the car, and the relief in his voice is palpable
  • her urges her to drop off her charge at a nearby hospital–there’s a doctor there he trusts–and come home
  • she scoffs. the subway is hardly home now
  • but she’s out of leads, out of options, so she does
  • she gets back to home base and slams the implant down on harold’s desk
  • “your machine’s a real piece of work, finch”
  • “ms. shaw, i understand you’re upset, but for all we know–”
  • “how long do we have till figure out about her implant?”
  • harold won’t meet her eyes
  • “i can’t say for sure. anywhere from…..three hours ago to three weeks from now, depending on what samaritan already knows”
  • “then we’re out of time” she goes into the subway car and stares down the monitors
  • “im gonna need more than that. she’s your helper monkey, not me”
  • she waits
  • and waits
  • and waits
  • through gritted teeth “please. she’s much better at putting up with your shit than the rest of us”
  • and then 
  • “we need her”
  • her phone buzzes. a call this time
  • “CAN. YOU. HEAR. ME”
  • “that’s more like it”
  • it feeds her an address and she calls fusco on the way. he says he’ll meet her there
  • “don’t do anything stupid without me, y’hear? i ain’t losin’ another one of you today”
  • “you know me, lionel. no promises”
  • it’s the asylum
  • fusco gets them in with his badge (”we’ve had some complaints filed about patient treatment. im gonna need to take a look around)
  • tm guides them to the proper wing, and from there through the labyrinth of halls and doors until shaw catches a glimpse of martine through a narrow window
  • she and fusco hug the wall to either side of the door
  • she signals to him–one, two, three
  • they barge in
  • martine whips around
  • shaw’s bullet catches her between the eyes before she even has a chance to draw her gun
  • fusco lets out a low whistle and shaw turns to the cot pushed up against the wall
  • root’s strapped down and looks like shit
  • she’s unconscious and there are bandages wrapped around her head
  • fusco helps shaw with the straps the between the two of them they support root’s dead weight
  • “hey finch, you busy?”
  • “working on an escape route now, ms. shaw”
  • they take an old side stairwell, a handful of samaritan goons hot on their trail
  • the boys are there to meet them with a car
  • fusco covers them while john and shaw get root into the backseat
  • he takes a bullet to the shoulder in the process
  • “you should be flattered, lionel. now you’re finally part of the team” john quips from the passenger seat once they’re in the clear
  • finch is the getaway driver. he glances at shaw via the rearview mirror
  • “ms. groves? is she–”
  • “i dont know.”
  • shaw is still cold, still unsettlingly calm
  • but her knuckles are white around the grip of her gun
  • her other arm cups root’s head in her lap
  • they get back to the subway and settle root into the bed john had recently occupied
  • there’s no time to change the sheets
  • root’s still unconscious, which leads shaw to believe either 1) anesthesia or 2) brain damage
  • she carefully peels back the bandages to inspect the damage
  • finch looks on anxiously
  • john’s taking care of fusco
  • root’s head is shaved to the scalp, but there are no stitches, no incisions
  • they got there in time
  • her ear, however, is another matter
  • there’s now a wound behind the left to match the scar behind the right
  • another stapedectomy
  • “they were gonna remove the implant next” shaw says flatly
  • “samaritan wanted to mutilate the interface and then no doubt determine the machine’s location” finch says, horrified
  • he can’t seem to tear his gaze from root’s face
  • he and john both urge shaw to rest, but she just pulls up a chair next to the bed and waits
  • bear rests his head in her lap and gazes up at her solemnly
  • it’s hours before root stirs
  • shaw’s at her side the moment the sheets rustle, holding her by the wrist
  • root’s eyes flutter open and she blinks dazedly at shaw
  • shaw squeezes her wrist
  • “you’re safe”
  • root frowns, staring at her mouth
  • recognition returns with her consciousness
  • her hand flies to her ear
  • drifts over the fresh bandages
  • she sits up abruptly, tries to talk, but the words come out garbled
  • “hey hey hey,” shaw takes root’s face in her hands. makes her focus on her
  • just her
  • “it’s gonna be okay. they didn’t get to the implant, okay? we’ll figure the rest out. you’re safe”
  • root’s eyes are locked on her mouth, reading the words
  • shaw pulls root into her chest and root sinks into her, wrapping her arms around shaw’s waist and burying her head in her shoulder
  • shaw rests her chin on the top of root’s head
  • they’ll figure it out
  • and then burn samaritan to the ground