ending the week with a bang

RVB Reverse Big Bang posting is next week, and I have a metric asston to edit and tweak before stuff happens and things go live and visible and you get to gaze at the beautiful work that my garbage writing will be accompanying. 

Other stuff is going to be on pause for a bit because of it, partially because I’m going up to the farm for a bit bc Thanksgiving is terrible. Before the end of the month, things will be where they’re supposed to be, but for a bit there’s going to be a pause on posting.

Just gotta get some shit together, and once it’s done it’s back to your scheduled programming. Or something. December’s a doozy.

So yeah, that. Soon. 

going to college/university in gotham city would be so wild???

  • a student who forgets to sort out their accommodation until the last minute and ends up moving into mr freeze’s hideout because everywhere else in town is full. still beats dorms i guess.
  • the welcome assembly is 6 hours long and most of it is what to do if you encounter the joker or batman or some other hero or villain and how the police are essentially useless.
  • non-gothamite students being freaked out over why the gothamite students aren’t panicking when their campus coffee shop gets held up by harley quinn and poison ivy.
  • city-wide catastrophes are not an excuse for getting out of finals week.
  • the black market is incredibly easy to access in gotham and ends up getting used by students wanting to make a quick buck by writing other people’s essays or stealing answers off tests. beware ex-psychology professors who do not take kindly to cheaters.
  • not being sure whether the sound you’re hearing is an explosion somewhere in town or just your neighbor’s music at 3AM. 
  • did you just see nightwing pass by your window or are you hallucinating from lack of sleep? 
  • riddler crashes the university’s servers, causing untold fear and panic to the students who had left their essays to the very last minute to turn in.
  • iceberg lounge is to be avoided, the drinks are so damn expensive and the nightlife is usually lousy unless batman’s doing a raid on the place.  
  • any drunk student could easily be taken in as a new batman villain. one minute you’re at a fancy dress party having a good time, the next thing you know you’re waking up in a jail cell with a suspicious, batarang shaped scar and the tabloids calling you Donkey Girl. 
  • every student thinks they can be robin within the first two weeks of moving to gotham. this usually does not end well. 
  • seeing two-face chilling at mcdonald’s on your friend’s snapchat story and not even being surprised at this point. 
  • no need to set an alarm for a 14 minute nap, batgirl will probably come crashing through your window anyway. 
  • most people want to bang either someone from the batfam or the rogues gallery. some have even attempted it.
  • fear toxin is put in the vents one time but almost no one is affected. everybody is already terrified for exams. 
  • most dorm rooms have an “adopt me batman” sign hanging from the windows, or variations of that (”adopt me catwoman” is a pretty popular one too)
Gotta go fast

Context: Me and some friends were playing a version of Dungeon of Doom that was adapted for 5e. There was a Kenku Rouge, Bugbear Bardbarian, and me, a Wood Elf Monk with boots of speed.

DM: You open the door, there’s a stairwell. All of the steps seem magic.
Me: I take out my short sword and tap each of the steps as I go up.
DM: What’s your speed?
Me: 60, why?
DM: As you step onto the second step, your speed is doubled.
Me: Holy shit, is that permanent?
DM: It might. You loose control of your momentum and fly up the steps, hitting each step, each one doubling your speed. There’s an iron door at the end of the steps.
Me: how many steps are there?
DM: counting the ones you’ve already hit, 70.
Party: Well shit.
Me: I click my heels together and activate my boots of speed. If I’m gonna die I’m going out with a bang.
Party: Well fuck.
*Math ensues*
DM: Ok, so, at the bottom, you are traveling at 168843120476043.6*the speed of light.
Party: HOLY FUCK!
DM: Congratulations, Monk, you just caused the big bang. Everyone dies. Universe resets. We’re restarting next week.

K-Pop

Week Ending July 31st, 2017

  1. BTS
  2. EXO
  3. SEVENTEEN
  4. GOT7 +1
  5. Monsta X −1
  6. Girls’ Generation +10
  7. BLACKPINK −1
  8. NCT 127 −1
  9. Wanna One +3
  10. Red Velvet −1
  11. SHINee
  12. B.A.P −2
  13. Twice
  14. VIXX
  15. DAY6 +3
  16. Big Bang +1
  17. NCT Dream −2
  18. K.A.R.D −10
  19. Jay Park
  20. NU'EST

The number in italics indicates how many spots a name moved up or down from the previous week. Bolded names weren’t on the list last week.

Originally posted by backroadimpala

Freshman Year In Queens Would Include...

- Moving to Queens and transferring to Midtown High School of Science and Technology.

~ Or as you put it: “The nerd school where I will literally be a loser amidst losers.”

- Meeting Peter Parker and Ned Leeds in seventh period math class. You arrived late and had to sit in the back between their desks. They don’t pay you much attention until Evelyn O’ Connor sticks gum in your hair while the teacher is out of the classroom. 

- Your previous shy and quiet demeanor changes to boss ass bitch attitude in a matter of seconds. Instead of exploding you calmly picked the gum from your hair and and used it to stick a “kick me” sign on Evelyn’s back.

~ SHE DOESN’T NOTICE?

- The entire rest of the period is you making rude hand gestures and faces at Evelyn’s back while Peter and Ned try not to laugh. Ned loses it when you manage to draw a dick on the back of Evelyn’s expensive white blouse without her knowing.

~ The teacher asks why you guys are laughing and you have a mini heart attack, terrified that they will tell on you.

~ Peter says he told a funny joke and the teacher believes him. You almost hug him right then and there.

- Ned invited you to sit with them at lunch.

- Meeting Flash Thompson for the first time when he tips over Ned’s food tray because “He doesn’t need to eat anymore or he’ll get even fatter.”

~ Yelling at Flash until he gives Ned enough money to buy more lunch plus ten bucks as a fee for being an asshole. 

~ “DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN YOU POOR EXCUSE FOR A MAN! NOW PAY FOR HIS DAMN LUNCH AND SUFFER WHILE I TEACH YOU HOW TO MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS BECAUSE NED IS PERFECT THE WAY HE IS AND YOU CAN JUST SHUT UP!”

- You are now den mother and certified protector of Ned Leeds and Peter Parker.

- Denying that Peter is cute but secretly hoping that he would like you back until you find out he likes Liz Allan. After that you focus on getting him to ask Liz out because compared to her you look like the inside of someone’s asshole. (Which is sad but come on, everyone looks like trash compared to Liz Allan. (And did you get the Deadpool reference?))

~”PETER PARKER JUST ASK HER OUT ALREADY!”

~”ARE YOU INSANE?! Oh you are, aren’t you?”

- Friday Movie Nights at Peter’s apartment are born and they are EPIC. Peter always wants to watch Star Wars and you want Star Trek. (It usually ends in a pillow fight.) Ned asks for Disney movies and gets a pillow chucked at his head.

- You sign up for debate club and Model United Nations where you meet Michelle Jones, who quickly becomes your friend. Together you slay the competition at meetings.

- Peter joins photography (cuz I wanted some of Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker in the mix.) and the mathletes with Ned.

- Actually getting top marks and sometimes outsmarting Peter, which he is not happy about. You are one of the smartest people in your grade, no doubt.

- Calling Michelle nicknames like “Mickey” and “Mick” even though it drives her crazy. 

- Discovering Peter has social anxiety like you and offering to have lunch in the storage closet if the cafeteria is too hectic. 

- Having a code word for when one of you has a panic attack or is feeling stressed. 

~ Having a code word for EVERYTHING ranging from “I’m bored let’s skip class” to “Oh my god Liz Allan is walking this way act cool.”

- Becoming VERY protective of the gang. A senior once tried to trick Peter on Senior Prank Day and you stared him down until the poor guy ran away. 

- Finding out Peter’s parents died and he lives with his Aunt May and Uncle Ben. 

~ Growing to love May like a mother and always hanging out at the Parker residence. 

- Freshman year ends with a bang. (No seriously like a fifth of the kids “do the do” on the last day IN SCHOOL and it’s kinda gross.)

- Uncle Ben dies and you stay at Peter’s apartment for a week to keep him company, not knowing he blames himself for Uncle Ben’s death. Peter never told you how Uncle Ben died but you refrained from asking. 

- Spiderman makes headlines as the new crime fighting vigilante and captures your interest. 

- You were walking home from an internship a Stark Industries™ and saw your favorite bookstore being robbed. For some stupid reason you decided to delay the robbers until the cops could arrive. 

~ “HEY UGLY! Considering the fact that you’re a criminal, I don’t think you’d be too smart-so why are ya looting a book store?”

~ Realizing the guy has two other friends and the only thing that goes through your mind is “oh shit.”

- A bigger guy holds the knife to your throat and keeps you hostage until Spiderman swings through the window to help. 

~ Him taking down all the bad guys except the one who is holding you at knife point. 

~ “Don’t come any closer or I’ll kill her faster than you can say Spiderman. Now let go of my buddies, leave the cash on the ground and I’ll give her ba-”

~ You kick the robber in the crotch and knock him to the ground, grabbing his knife and pointing it at him. 

~ “You know you should really keep the monologue short if ya want to get away. Just saying.”

- Spiderman being in awe at what you did.

~ “How did you-He just-You took down a guy with a knife!” 

- Rushing home to find Peter pacing around, waiting for you.

~ “You tried to stop a robbery?”

“How did you-”

“It was-uh… on the news?”

- You dismissed the nervous tone to his voice. The two of you ended up pretending not to cuddle on the couch, even though Peter’s arm was around your waist and your head was on his shoulder.

- The rest of the summer went quickly, the only eventful thing being your promotion at Stark Industries™ from unpaid intern to lab assistant. 


Don't steal from me & say I stole from you.

So, this is my one & only story of great revenge. (Maybe not amazing revenge, but it made me feel so much better.) I apologize for the length.

I was a junior in college, living with scuba roommate (She was a scuba instructor in the off season). The other two girls who were supposed to live with us never showed up, so we had a beautiful semester living in a 2 bedroom townhouse (meant for 4 people). We got along very well.

Second semester starts, and we get a new roomie (I’ll call her Dee.) So Dee is dating (whom Scuba and I call Mr. Burns-he did NOT attend the college, nor any college) This guy is the biggest d-bag that I have ever met. He was openly dating 4 girls (this is the age of nextel’s, the PTT kind, so EVERY conversation he had was projected across our townhouse.) He hid nothing from any of girls. He had no job, no car, no life. Dee gave him a place to stay, and use of her car. The other girls gave him money if he needed.

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HQ boys at the beach

                           (A little hint at NSFW but meh)          


                                         Karasuno

Hinata- Has like, nearly drowned 46 times trying to win a swimming contest against Kags

Kageyama- The fucking child is picking a fight with waves

Tsukishima- Like ??? He disappeared with Yamguchi hours ago?

Yamaguchi- Actually just chilling in a cove with Tsukki building a sand castle, multiple seagulls are attracted to him (they actually really like him) and Tsukki’s getting jealous of seagulls (jesus christ)

Sugawara- He never tans or burns he’s just there, if anything, he gets paler. Nearly drowned the first years in sunscreen when they arrived. Tanning (attempting) with Daichi.

Daichi- Cracking dad jokes to strangers (they laugh anyway?? Suga’s done.) Man tans like crazy, although a NICE tan. (you could cut diamonds with those glistening abs let me tell you.)

Noya- Can’t reach the order window of the snow cone truck, forces Asahi for carry him, been mistaken for Asahi’s child for god knows how many times. Poor thing nearly cried when he dropped his cone.

Asahi- Nearly escorted off the beach twice in 30 minutes, shared Italian ice with Noya. WAS ACTUALLY HIT ON BY THESE TWO REALLY HOT GIRLS AND WAS SO CONFUSED. HELP THIS CHILD. (NOYA WAS NOT HAVING IT MHM)

Tanaka- Tried to impress girls by showing them his back muscles and flexing, all of them burst out laughing because Ennoshita drew a dick with sunscreen on his back and tanned there

                                               Nekoma

Kuroo: Actual 5 year old, fell into the sand like 8 times, sat next to Kenma for the most part

Kenma- Actually hissed when his toe got into the sunlight, underneath a beach umbrella on his PSP the entire time (actually making sure Kuroo doesn’t kill himself)

Lev- Had gotten asked over 13 times already if he was kidnapping the small child he was bugging next to him (Yaku)

Yaku- Life guards thought he was a child multiple times and reminded him multiple times not to go into the water above his waist, ready to fight someone at this point.

                                              Fukurodani

Bokuto- Had a breathing contest with Kuroo underwater, passed out halfway through, forced Akaashi to judge and was nearly murdered in the end.

Akaashi- Chills with Kenma complaining (fondly) on the idiot boyfriends, was dragged out of the shade by Bokuto and got sunburned immediately, nearly murdered him, RIP Bokuto. Sulked to Kenma when Bokuto was flirted with, ran off with Kenma because Bokuto embarrassed him by screaming how good he looked his swimsuit (save him)

                                               Aoba Johsai

Iwaizumi- Buried Oikawa under the sand when he started to brag how good he looked, no ones seen both of them in awhile

Oikawa- Still underneath all the sand with only his head poking out, complained till ‘Iwa-chan’ gave him a kiss, had this sappy ‘watching the sunset back moment’,

Matsukawa- Totally looked up dick butt memes with Makki and drew them in the sand

Hanamaki- Told Mattsun, “A guy like you is rarer than any pepe.”, totally got banged into the sand, (Ended up ruining the sand sketch, had sand burns for a week)

Kyoutani- Ignoring everyone pretty much and playing with the dogs that are there

Yahaba- HAS TO ASK THE OWNERS IF KYOUTANI CAN PET THEIR DOGS BECAUSE KYOUTANI’S TOO AWKWARD

They hardly ever fight.

Disagreements they have in spades, ranging from the playful to the exasperated to the irritated. But actual fights? For Lucy and Lockwood, those are few and far between, and usually only about one thing: each other’s safety.

The quickest way Lockwood’s found to make Lucy truly angry is to imply—or worse, actually act on the assumption—that her life is worth more than his. It doesn’t matter if the act of risking his own life saves hers. It doesn’t matter that they both always make it out alive. One of Lucy’s deepest rooted fears is someday being responsible for his death, and when he is forced to make her face that fear he knows they’re in for a fight.

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Tidal Waves | Teen Wolf

Pairing: Derek Hale x Reader

Summary: Roommate AU! When Allison suggests that you move in with a close friend of hers, you never expected to fall in love.

A/N: There is smut in this. I really enjoyed writing this, like so much. Please, please do leave feedback. Readers don’t understand how much feedback could motivate a fanfic writer to actually write.

Masterlist | Leave Requests Here (Especially Christmas Themed Ones)

Originally posted by hoechlinteeth

After reading, more or less, twenty articles about ‘how moving house was the most stressful thing you would probably ever do in your life’, you were weary whether to leave the comfort of your parent’s house and move into an apartment with a stranger. The thing that threw you over the edge, was waking up on a Sunday morning, your only day off,  to your mother hovering at eight in the morning. Then and there, you knew you had to get out. You spent weeks searching through online and newspapers ads to find the perfect apartment close to where you work, and with a decent girl that wasn’t too loud or dirty. You went to a couple of showings, but it was either the room was too small, or your future roommate was creeping you out slightly.

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anonymous asked:

Can you do a fic where the sides want to make Virgil laugh so they try different things but only tickling him works?

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Fandom: Sanders Sides
Pairings: (not sure how to tag it, so) LAMP, Moxiety, Analogical, Prinxiety
Warnings: None

Summary: The Sides compete to hear Virgil laugh.
A/N: Pun source
Edit: Alternate Ending

Tagged: @existental-crises​​ @here-to-vent@jordisama


Patton had made the realization a week ago: none of them had ever heard Virgil laugh.  Snickers aside, he’d never actually laughed in front of any one of them. Patton had presented his finding to Virgil, looking for some kind of solace, but instead he’d just gotten a noncommittal shrug.

“Yeah? So?”  He said as he lounged on the stairs, pulling at the loose threads of his sleeves.

“Sooo we’ve gotta hear you laugh!  I bet it’s a wonderful laugh and I’d love to hear it sometime.”  Patton looked into Virgil’s eyes hopefully, shoulders tensing in anticipation as Virgil leaned closer.  He opened his mouth and after a short pause, spoke softly into Patton’s ear.

“Say something funny and maybe I will.”

Patton’s shoulders slumped in defeat. “Well I’m loads funny!”

“Sorry, Pat,” Virgil said, leaning back on his elbows, sounding entirely unapologetic. “It’s gotta be funny in the moment or it isn’t happening.  Or–” he gasped, “what if I can’t laugh?”  He said mockingly, covering his mouth with false disbelief.

“Oh, stop it, you goof,” Patton said, swatting lightly at Virgil’s knee.  “We’ll hear that laugh sooner or later, just you wait.”  Virgil shrugged again and Patton turned on his heel, stomping away to start planning schemes to make Virgil laugh.

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Haikyuu Fics

kagehina:
> dork realises his feelings towards smol ball of sunshine
> two childern holding hands
> “dumbass!” freeform

iwaoi:
> 94% angst
> 5% cuddles + angst
> 1% did i mention angst in the tags bc there’s angst
(bonus: major character death)
> AU galore
+ “rude, iwa-chan!”

daisuga:
> I AM STRAIGHt well hello there
> 40% sinnamon suga

asanoya:
> oh shit i like him but he’s like a friend to me and friends don’t do that what do i do and oh god here he comes i am totally not freaking out - asahi

bokuroo:
> bro
> dude
> man
> we should fuck

tsukkiyama:
> shut up yamaguchi i love you
> the fluff is strong in this one

bokuaka:
> AKAAAASHI I LOVE YOU or *bokuto hiding behind kuroo everytime he sees akaashi bc he can’t handle his feelings* - there is no in between
> the shitty (but effective) matchmaker kuroo tetsurou
> flustered owls + pda

kuroken:
> NOTICE ME KENMA
> “one minute, i need to clear this round”

ushioi:
> sin
+ a surprising amount of teeth rotting fluff
> ushiwaka

kurodai:
> flustered daichi/kuroo
> nerds @ college AU
> “holy shit those thighs” - kuroo

kurotsukki:
> sNARKy fluff
> saltyshima supreme
> ya’ll need bibles

matsuhana:
> creampuff duo
> meme team ft. friendship & mutual banging

"Proper Fancied"

Request: Can i request a remus x reader where its after a full moon and she’s helping him to his dorm with the marauders but her dorm is first so shes about to go in but they all hear the other girls making fun of her (kind of like look at me I’m sandra dee) and they let it slip that she has a crush on remus? Thanks I love your log btw ❤️

Pairing: Young Remus Lupin x Reader

Warnings: Crude language, sort of angst? Manly loving, lots of worrying, not much fluff ngl and a bit of a sadistic reader (you’ll see)

Word Count: 2399

I tried to make it cute but I did do this on separate days so it sort of turned? I honestly had no idea what happened since I tried to make it very light-hearted and Marauder-y! But please do enjoy this whirlpool of a shitstorm~ Don’t be afraid to give me your opinions either xx.


It’s the worst one you’d seen yet.

James had rushed into your dormitory not long back – they always seemed to somehow get past the magical slide - and had promptly dragged you out of the room without any explanation despite your frantic complaints of his sudden actions.

You were just about to clamber into your bed, the rest of the gals were Merlin knows where (they never really invited you with them that much, but you didn’t particularly care, you had four brilliant friends that meant the world to you), meaning you were still in some oversized shirt that probably belonged to Peter or one of the boys and some ridiculous looking pumpkin patterned shorts. Not the greatest of looks you had to admit.

“-James! What-what’s going on?” you hastily questioned as you nearly tripped over a step, his long legs striding further than yours could ever reach. His hair was in an horrendously disheveled state that you’d never seen since he had attempted to comb his curls back in your 3rd year. “Moony, he-” James choked out and your heart leaped as you realized that-

Oh my Merlin, he’s crying? What’s happen to Remus?

With the resolve of the determined Gryffindor you were, you halted, grasping a moving James by his broad-woahwhendidhegetthisbroad- shoulders and gently shook him. “James, calm down love. Breathe, tell me what’s happened before you drag me to my death?” You gave him a comforting smile, still keeping the wit in your voice, the last thing you want is an even more panicked James. He never worked well when he was crying; it always ended up with blurred vision, tripping, walking into walls and intensive hiccupping that resembled the squeak of polishing trophies that Filch made us do every week.

James shoved his glasses up on his head and wiped his face dry, “Its Moony- he,” sniffle “-it’s the worst its ever been, he’s proper banged up, we’ve messed up,” he looked up, his guilty eyes puffy and red, “Y/N, I don’t know what’s going to happen.”

You completely forgot, it was the full moon that night. The boys never let you join in their animagi antics and to be frank you didn’t want to see someone you admired so much in unbearable pain. You knew Remus didn’t like you seeing him when his furry problem came about, he didn’t want you to worry nor see him in such a weakened state. Your feelings towards the sandy haired boy didn’t even waver when he first admitted it you, it even grew; you just felt so flattered and grateful that Remus trusted you enough to tell you.

If only I could do the same for him, feelings are ridiculous, I have decided.

You both hastily arrived at the hospital wing in record time and you had promptly burst into a sobbing puddle as you saw your Remus-abravestrongwonderfulboy- just laid there limp and so fragilebrokenscarred. Remus’s head rested on the pillow, a horrendous jagged scar slashed over his nose, barely skimming across his skin, the mark an enflamed red.

You collapsed onto the stools next to Peter, holding onto the shaking boy for dear life, his arms pulling you into the comforting embrace you certainly needed. Bless this boy, he definitely knew how to make you feel better.

And that’s where you stayed the whole night, hunched over a stool, one hand holding Sirius’s and the other tenderly grasping Remus’s. You all had to leave early morning however to escape the wrath of Madame Pomfrey if she ever found out we snuck in to see her most fragile patient. The four of you, minus Remus who still hadn’t woken up, dragged yourselves up to the Gryffindor Common room still half asleep with James mumbling something about hippogriffs taking McGonagall hostage and a giggling comment at your pumpkin shorts.  You had successfully snuck back into your dorm, the boys making sure to walk you there like they always did, then proceeded to shuffle to their own shared room. Slipping into your bed was no problem, your roommates were deep asleep and hopefully too smashed from last night to notice you weren’t in your bed.

You all did the exact same that night too, tiptoeing down to the hospital wing in the middle of the cold September air just to huddle by Remus’s side. You never pressed the boys to what had happened, you were curious but you didn’t want to know what danger they accidently placed themselves in.

Staring down at Remus’s face, the wound no longer looked sore or reddened but it looked much more calmed yet tender. This was definitely going to leave a particularly nasty scar. You were slumped on Remus’s right side, your head nestled in the crook of your arm, the hand mindlessly stroking Remus’s hair whilst the other drawing circles on the sheet. You couldn’t fall asleep no matter how hard you tried, instead your absent mind whirled with thought preoccupied with the boy laid unconscious before you. The Madame said he had awoken earlier but his body needed the sleep so he kept drifting off asleep every so often.

The boys were all deep within their dreams, their slight snoring somehow calming you slightly. Your eyes heavily shut, stained from them being open for so long when clearing of a throat snapped you awake. Glancing down, your eyes met the tired, but familiar hazel azure that was Remus’s.

“Hi.” You softly greeted, trying hard not to choke up and cry in front of the boy. Remus gave you a tired smile despite how painful it must be to move his face, Hi Y/N.” His voice held a sore rasp to it but it sounded wonderful saying your name.

“How you feeling Moony?” You whispered, your voice shaking and you were well aware that the hand that was stroking his hair was now trembling ever so slightly. “Just a bit peachy.” Remus let out a little chuckle and you couldn’t help but snort amusement, “You look like you dueled Grindelwald and you’re ‘just peachy’, you absolute numpty.” you shook your head lightly in mock exasperation as Remus shook his light-heartedly.

“Well I you must know, I definitely feel better with you here.” Your hand faltered their strokes in his sandy locks and Remus suddenly cleared his throat, “-you all here, I mean. I appreciate it.” He quickly clarified as he glanced at the other boys slumped around him, his eyes filled with fondness and love that nothing in the world could ever compare.

You didn’t know what words to say to him after that so you left it, leaving the room in a comfortable silence with only the soft breaths and snores of the boys to fill the room. Ever so gently, they lulled your mind to peace and your eyelids shut with you fast asleep.


The next morning consisted of waking up to Peter crying over Remus, Sirius launching into an apologetic speech and James prodding your cheek rather uncomfortably, simply finding childish enjoyment of watching them squish together as drool unattractively dripped out of your mouth. You weren’t very happy to say the least.

When the lads all had their little sob sesh with a very overwhelmed Remus, it was our job to help support him up to the dorm room before the students filtered down for breakfast. All the way in Gryffindor Tower. The opposite side of the castle.

What followed was a lot of cursing; “merlin’sleftballsac-

A lot of fake reassurance; “I got this! I got this, yep I defi-igotthis-!”

A lot of complaints; “Why do you weigh so much! You’ve been snacking on the pork pies again haven’t you Remus.”

“Y/N why are you just standing there and not helping?”

“…I’m the visual motivation that keeps you going..?”

Slowly, but surely, you managed to support him through the portrait hole and up the dormitory stairs. However the boys were determined to see you to your dorm first as James calls it “A tradition for our lovely Y/N to show that we Marauders can too, be gentlemen!”

You all heaved yourselves up the girl’s stairs and made a few confusing twists and turns to your specific dorm room, Peter unlinking his arm from yours and dramatically bowing down to you as you let out a snort of delight. You thanked the boys generously and hastily, and you opened your door but paused when your name was called. Turning around you were met with the boys looking almost insulted. You raised a confused eyebrow, “What?”.

 “Didn’t think you’d actually go without a marauder hug!” James wiggled his eyebrows and a wide smile split open on your face, their hugs always were the cure to your low moods. You dived into his open arms as he rocked from side to side, his curled hair stuffing itself into your face. Peter was already hugging you dearly by the time James let go and you couldn’t help but laugh when Sirius lifted you away from him in his loving arms.

“Merlin Y/N! You’ve been snacking on them pork pies as well haven’t you!” Sirius joked as he put you down and you grumpily hit his arm, ignoring his string of apologies. He knew you loved him really. You turned to the last hug.

Remus stood by himself, no longer supported by the Quidditch fanatics, his arms wide and a knowing smile on his face. His hands motioned you to come close and you gently slid into his hug, careful not to hurt any of his wounds. The hug was warm and secure and you knew that your feeling for Remus were no longer a silly crush that you had dubbed in your mind. You’d never think of Sirius or Peter or James in the same way you viewed Remus, you felt selfish and guilty though, hiding your feeling in the form of being “just best mates”.

Suddenly, you heard a very mocking laugh which broke you and Remus from your hug. You turned to the sound to realize it was only your roommates and it came from the slightly ajar door you left open. You gave the boys an apologetic look, but before you could actually apologies, another voice you recognized as Denise echoed throughout the hallway.

“Y/N’s probably fucking one of them now and I’ll bet you two galleons that it’s Black.” Her claim was followed by a fit of giggling and followed by stunned silence from us. None of us made a sound, too shocked by what just had occurred.

“Nonononono! I saw her rushing out with Potter the other night and she hasn’t even slept here for the past couple days. My money’s on Potter.” The high scratchy pitch that had replied was Tracey, the sound of rustling and rummaging could be heard followed by a triumphant “Aha!”. The girls let out “oooohs” and snickers as you heard Mellissa mockingly clear her throat.

“Ladiiesss and gentlemen! May I present the atrocious wardrobe that is Y/N L/N.” She sang and your throat closed up, you knew you never had the best of clothing choices and you couldn’t believe they were rummaging through your stuff!

“Look at me~ I galivant like I’m a marauder, and I act as if I’m the next best thing since water~” She crooned, giggling as she presumably ridiculed me across the room. Denise let out a loud laugh, wheezing so bad she resembled a dying whale, she interrupted Mellissa’s singing with a wave of her hands.

“That’s Remus’s shirt and all! She’s definitely screwing Lupin, only someone like him would pity her.” She cackled and you felt fury blaze in your blood but before you could storm in there to show her a piece of your mind, Tracey’s words impacted you the most.

“Well she did say she proper fancied Remus.”

Embarrassment, humiliation and most of all, shame shot through your body as tears brimmed your eyes. You could see Peter look uncertainly between the door, Remus and you but you didn’t want to see the sandy haired boy’s reaction. You didn’t want to see his disgusted expression. You strutted forwards, your thoughts whirling with numerous plans of revenge.

“Excuse me gentlemen, I have three cunts to dispose of.” Rage ignited within you and you ignored Sirius’s warning before you stormed into the room, magically locking the door behind you. A string of furious hexes left your mouth and chaos ensued the room a few seconds later.


It was rather satisfying, letting your feelings out.

You sat on your bed rather giddily, surrounded by some of your favorite treats from the numerous times you snuck out to Hogsmeade, a couple fashion magazines and a nice warm mug of Butterbeer you got one of the house elves to fetch you.

You were in the middle of reading why Jobberknoll feathers wouldn’t complement your skin tone when you heard an owl pecking at your window. You gave the bird an exasperated look from across the room but shifted all your stuff to the side before making your way to the window located on the opposite side of the room.

You passed Denise who was intensely looking at you in fear, her usually golden hair half singed off, now a horrid neon yellow and a feather magically tickling her feet, however she was helpless; Frozen by the full body-bind curse you had sent her way, leaving her needing to squirm and laugh, yet unable to do so.

You let out a delighted hum as you stepped over a ‘‘Petrificus Totalus’’ed Tracey who was sporting a rather unattractive green hue with purple boils, and made your way over to the window. Unlatching it you saw that the owl had a note attached to its leg, you gave the cute thing a little treat and you had noticed its eye was looking confusingly behind you. You turned around and snorted, understanding its immense confusion.

“Don’t worry love, you’re not seeing things, she’s human.” You reassured the brown beauty, referring to Mellissa who strung up- upside down and was covered in feathers from head to toe and had antlers sprouting out of her forehead- she too placed in a full body-binding spell. You shut the window and trotted back to your bed, sliding under the warm covers and unfolded the dainty note.

“Don’t worry Y/N, I ‘proper fancied’ you too. xx”

Swear Jar

It’s been way too long since i’ve written fanfiction and SuperCorp just had to drag my whipped ass down that hole again

Based on a prompt i saw on tumblr a long time ago about Kara actually having a swear jar for Lena and after a night together Lena just shoves her credit card inside… If anyone knows the post please tell me so I can amrk it here! 

It’s also on AO3 :http://archiveofourown.org/works/9567863


The first sign Lena Luthor had become a constant in their lives comes on a Saturday morning.

It’s subtle, it really is, and it takes Alex longer than she likes to admit to see. She doesn’t notice at first, when she uses her key to open Kara’s apartment door and heads straight to the kitchen after her sister’s greeting.

Kara’s not even surprised, it’s Saturday, which means breakfast together. And it’s the third Saturday, which means blueberry pancakes. And by the stack of fruit currently sitting on top of the counter, she hasn’t forgotten what day it is.

(She never does, it’s food after all.

Alex should really stop hoping her sister ever would.

Because it usually leads to an expletive from her and there are only a certain amount of one dollar bills Alex carries around.)

“I heard that!” Kara exclaims, pointing a finger at her sister and giggles when Alex retrieves her wallet from her pocket to fish for a note

‘Get exchange’, she adds on her mental list right after ‘buy Maggie’s vegan ice cream’ and ‘convince Maggie to watch The L Word with me’.

(“Danvers, I adore you, but I can only go through that once.”)

It’s when she notices. She would really like to say she reacted in a better way; she would really like to say she just smirked knowingly and continued the day. But no, of course it didn’t happen that way. She gasped and chuckled, then proceeded to cough for a whole minute trying to cover it.

Because right in between the ‘Cooler Danvers’ and ‘Mags Swags’ jars rested another one. Belonging to no one other than Lena Luthor.

Lee :)

And Alex should have seen it coming, because there’s only a reasonable amount of fake interviews Kara could come up with before just admitting she just wanted to hang out with the woman. Fucking Maggie.

“I heard that too!”

She puts two dollars into her jar before adding ‘pay five bucks to Maggie’ in her mental list. She should’ve have seen it coming.

She tries not to think about the jars that had already taken place besides hers. Tech Nerd; Better Lane; Jimmy Bravo; Mon-El. She thinks about how hers it’s the only one around. She really hopes those two others stay this time.

**

The first time she actually sees it happening is during game night the following week.

Lena sits on the other side of the counter, directly in front of Alex, her expression nothing like the one she saw when the woman arrived. Any resemblance of a smile gone from her face and she stares back at Alex.

Winn and Maggie are already out of this hand and the Luthor waits for Alex to decide if she’ll cover it.

“I’ll cover it.”

And it’s when James and Kara come to join them, Kara handing a glass of wine for Lena, hand resting at the small of her back. Alex sees the look Maggie gives her and the raise in her eyebrows. She chooses to ignore both.

Lena downs her hand, smug smile already on her lips, and okay, Alex has to admit she’s growing fond of the woman in front of her. Especially when Kara is looking at her like that.

But when Alex copies her, she’s sure no one but herself and Kara heard the fainted “shit” coming out of her mouth and an audible gasp from her sister. Lena doesn’t budge, but lets out a sigh and leans in, stretching her arm towards her jar. She tucks in a ten dollar bill before looking back at Kara, raised eyebrow in a silent question. A frown appears in her face but she nods nevertheless.

“Saving for the rest of the night.” Lena explains before looking at Alex once more. “I’ve finally found a rival on poker.”

By the end of the night, Lena adds two extra dollars in her jar and Alex slips her own five in hers.

**

“How long until those two bang?” Maggie asks her later, when James and Winn had already left for good twenty minutes, after dragging Alex out of the apartment and the poker tournament her girlfriend indulged with Lena.

“What?”

“Your sister and Lena.”

“What!”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t see.”

“You know what; I’m not talking about it.”

“I give them two months.”

**

The second time it happens is three weeks later, when Maggie finally had some time off of work and it was one of those nights the DEO didn’t need Alex or Supergirl.

Maggie curls against her side, hand automatically wrapping around her shoulders and a lingering kiss against her temple.

This time, when the two arrived for movie night, a sheepish Kara opening the door to let them in, Alex reaction was smoother.

Way smoother.

But the sight one the one and only Lena Luthor sitting in her sister’s couch, flannel pajama pants (which she was rather sure it was her sister’s) and loose t-shirt, was definitely not one she was expecting to see.

(She ignores the huge grin on her girlfriend’s face and drags her to the loveseat after grabbing two bottles of beer.)

“No horror movies!” Kara shouts from the kitchen.

“No romances either!” Alex shouts back. “Do you know what we should watch?” The urge to grin is too strong and she ends up with a huge smile towards her glaring girlfriend.

“Alex, no.”

“We should watch The L Word.”

“No!” The exclamation comes from both Lena and Maggie at the same time and they share a knowing look.

Kara comes back from the kitchen, ice cream for herself and glass of wine for Lena, to find her sister laughing at the exasperation in the other two faces.

The one who recovers first is Lena, sitting up straighter and sighing before looking at Alex.

“Look, it’s a classic and basically every non-straight girl has watched it, but once was enough watching that shit.”

“Lena.”

“I’ll put a dollar on it next time I get up, don’t worry.”

They settle down with Orphan Black, after all, and if Alex notices her sister’s hand on Lena’s thigh, she doesn’t mention. Neither does she mention the way they lean into each other after thirty minutes. Or how, by the end of the second episode, Kara’s head is dropped in Lena’s shoulder, the latter letting her hands run through the other’s hair.

She also ignores the ‘they’re definitely banging’ Maggie whispers against her ear before she gets up to get herself another beer.

**

Third time happens after a very distressed Kara arrived at the DEO pacing and rambling about how Lena freaking Luthor knew.

(Of course she did; Alex thinks everyone does.

Kara does a very poor job at hiding it.)

But her sister is going crazy in front of her because she thinks Alex is going to hate her for letting her secret slip like that.

Instead, Alex shrugs, it was bound to happen sooner or later, and she would kill someone before telling them she rather liked Lena.

(She was really good at poker and could handle her alcohol. That was enough.

The fact that she made Kara smile like that was nothing but a bonus.)

When Alex put a stop to her pacing, hand on her shoulder, she was met by a pout and puppy eyes. How could she be mad after that?

And when she just smiled and told Kara to pick Lena Luthor up and bring her in to sign the NDA, Kara hugged her, a tad too tightly, not that she would mention it to her excited sister, and flied off.

(They came back an hour later, Lena blurting out a different expletive every time Alex showed her another room. Every time to be met with a scold from Supergirl.)

**

Maybe Alex should consider giving Kara’s apartment key back.

Because on a Saturday, four weeks after the last incident, she lets herself in, bags of groceries swinging as she uses her ankle to close the door behind her.

(It’s scrambled eggs and bacon day and two years ago she learned Kara could eat at least a dozen eggs.

And grocery shopping isn’t her best skill.)

The first sign this Saturday isn’t like the others is the lack of cheerful greeting from a very excited Kara Danvers as soon as she opened the door. The opposite, to be honest, it is way too quiet for her sister to even be home. When she starts questioning that maybe there was a Supergirl emergency she hears a loud thud coming from Kara’s bedroom.

It leads her to the second sign. A black purse lying down at the counter, coat haphazardly thrown by the side. Both not her sister’s.

And Kara comes running from the hallway, blushed cheeks and disheveled hair, just pulling down an oversized shirt over. Third sign. And she wanted to scream in frustration because Maggie has been winning most of the bets so far.

“Alex! What are you doing here?”

“It’s Saturday.”

“Is it?”

She puts the grocery bag down on the counter and looks at her sister. Kara fidgets under her gaze. She should go. And leave the key behind.

But then, tentative footsteps come from the hall and when she looks over, Lena Fucking Luthor stands there, unbuttoned shirt barely reaching the middle of her thighs. When she catches the stare, the change is unbelievable. Gone is the woman who was just caught off guard and standing there was the CEO, raised chin and long confident steps until she reaches for the coat.

“Lena?” Kara asks but she just smiles and takes her credit card off the pocket.

She’s not doing it, she’s not going to, oh, she did it. No! No, this is more than I needed to know.

“Before I forget.” She puts it inside her jar and, at least, blushes a little when she sees the look Alex is giving her, before she goes back to the bedroom.

Kara looks like a mess, pretty much a broken mess gasping for air and blushing up to the tip of her ears.

Because, fifth sign, next to ‘Lee :)’ is a fourth jar. Puppy Danvers. Alex counts maybe half a dozen bills shoved inside before tearing her eyes away.

“I’ll call next time.” Kara blushes harder, and she thinks this morning broke her sister. Kara squeaks a hurries goodbye and once she’s outside, she hears the door being locked from the inside. Not very helpful now.

Finish Hank’s report; pick up clothes at the laundry; clean my eyes with bleach; give Maggie ten doll-twenty, give Maggie twenty dollars. Maggie was right, Lena Luthor was definitely a black lace kind of woman.

Buy two bottles of bleach.

Kpop conversations

Okay so i accidentally sent my best friend a Chanbaek pic, instead of another pic, a week ago and Chanyeol caught her eye. She ended up stanning EXO (and then people say visuals are useless) and a couple of days ago, decided to stan all of kpop. We’ve already had some hilarious conversations which would remind anyone of the times they were getting into kpop or certain groups.

##

Her: i’m gonna search up EXO memes
Me: bro don’t do that you’ll get sucked into a void
[an hour later]
Her: i should have listened to you

##

Her: Big Bang members look so similar
Me: search Girls Generation or Super Junior up
Her: *searches them up*
Her: i take it back

##

Her: *sends me a pic of GD hugging a teddy bear*
Her: GD IS SO FUCKING CUTE
Me: *sends her a GD snap from Fantastic Baby MV*
Her: who tf is that?
Me: who do you think?
Her: … wait what

##

Her: *comes across a Big Bang pic*
Her: who’s this guy with the weird hair?
Me (over the phone): probably GD
Her: no bro i know GD and T.O.P
Me: Taeyang then
Her: *searches him up*
Her: nope
Me: Daesung?
Her: *searches him up*
Her: not him either
Me: Seungri’s left
Her: that must be him
Her: *searches him up*
Her: bRO NO OKAY THIS ONE TURNED OUT HOT WTF

##

Her: i wanna stan Super Junior
Me: um i think you’d wanna go for groups with less confusing lineups first
Her: oh c'mon how confusing can it get anyway
Her: *comes across an SJ lineup by the year chart*
Her: … i guess i’ll stan SHINee first

##

Her: how TF DO I MANAGE TO FIND HEECHUL WHEREVER I GO

##

Her: i listened to Ring Ding Dong
Me: … got weirded out?
Her: weirded out to fucking afterlife bro how do people even
[that night]
Her: is it wrong i’ve been jamming to Ring Ding Dong for the past two hours?
Me: nope

##

Me: yk some people speculate Sehun and Yoona’s equation to be something like Sehun is secretly in love with Yoona but she sees him as a younger brother.
Her: who tf would see Sehun as a younger brother?
Her: well probably an SNSD member
Me: bro you already know your stuff lmao
Her: it does not take a lot of stanning to know where SNSD stands

##

Her: bro how do you pronounce the name of that group 2-N-E-1
Me: twen(t)y one
Her: *drops jaw*
Me: lmao what’s wrong?
Her: … bro
Me: your life’s been a lie?
Her: fuck yeah bro

##

Her: Red Velvet’s visuals are no joke
Me: ikr?!
Her: where did they find girls that stunning?
Me: yk people call WENDY the visual hole
Her: i think i know who you’re talking about
Me: that girl who sang “vanilla chocolate honey with a cherry on top”
Her: *gasps fucking hard*
Me: i feel you bro
Her: are people fUCKING BLIND?!

##

Her: *sings Dumb Dumb after every sentence*
Her: bro i think i need help

##

Me: bro search “NCT Taeyong” up and send me a pic you do not like
Her: alright
[an hour later]
Her: still searching bro

##

Her: Jimin is so beautiful
Me: AOA, 15& or BTS?
Her:
Her: Park Jimin!
Me: bro 15& or BTS?
Her:
Her: BTS
Her: … i should’ve said BTS when you first asked

##

Her: is it 2AM or 2PM? the name of that band
Me: they’re both two different bands
Her: … oh

##

Her: is it just me or is Jennie too perfect to be true
Me: the latter

##

Her (reading the names of Twice members): Sana; Mina; Momo; ayy i like this!
Me: just wait
Her: Chae… Chaeyoung… Jun… Jung… okay wtf i give up
Her: i’ll just go listen to their songs again

##

Her (reading the names of GOT7 members): JB; Mark; Jackson; i have a bad feeling
Her: *continues reading*
Her: … i knew it
Her: i love f(x) and Blackpink all of a sudden

##

Her: how are ALL of them so pretty?
Her: if only i was half as pretty as them
Her: i’m a fucking potato bro

##

Her: *comes across Taehyung’s pic*
Her: this guy is so cute wow
Her: *hears his voice for the first time*
Her: WTF
Her: this is like Chanyeol all over again
Her: how tf can people with such baby faces have voices like that? what sorcery is this?

##

Me: *sings along to Chained Up*
Her: asdfghjkl FREEZE ARMOR DOWN NANANANANANANANANANA qwertyuiopasdfghjkl zxcvbnm CHAINED UP CHAINED UP

##

Her: what’s the most extra group out there
Me: definitely BtoB
Her: … they’re more extra than GOT7?
Me: Sungjae cracked a watermelon open with his head
Her: 
Her:
Her:
Her: i’m genuinely taken aback

##

Her: B.A.P and Monsta X members look kinda weird
Her: *listens to some of their songs*
Her: I’M SORRY I EVER SAID THAT

##

Her: i think i should stan Seventeen
Her: how many members do they have?
Me: thirteen
Her: well at least not seventeen
Her: *searches them up*
Her: … look seventeen to me tho
Me: lmao brings back memories

##

Her: *is probably jamming to Bang Bang Bang rn*

So, I have to ask about hair: I’m fascinated by your bangs. You cut it right at the end of shooting, right? Did you do it to say, I’m done with Claire?

C: I think it was a really pathetic mini rebellion. I did it in South Africa. We had another two weeks to go. I cut it myself—I robbed the scissors from the hair and makeup department and I took them home and I just was like [chopping motion]. We have a long season. It’s 10 months; it’s very intense. And sometimes I think you want to own a little bit of your own life, and I think that was my really silly personal rebellion.

S: Everything is controlled. You have great freedom playing the characters, but our lives are so structured, you know, the way you look.

Is it a disguise? Can you now go to the grocery store or walk through an airport and people don’t recognize you?

C: I mean, I can do that anyway. Because I’m scruffy in my day-to-day life. They don’t expect a TV actress to be as scruffy as I am, it’s great. I’ll be standing with him and people will be like, “Sam, Sam, can we take your picture?” And then, like five minutes later, they’ll like, “Oh!” and realize it’s me, because they just think I’m this schleppy…I don’t know.

S: I think you always look glamorous.

C: No, I don’t.

S: You do.

-Elle Magazine 2017

Professor’s Desk

Namjoon | BTS | M | 6,315

Keep reading

A quiet dinner

Request: Can I request a Carl smut where like he fingers u somewhere he’s not supposed to like during class or near other people or something and like teases u and then later they have sex? No pressure but it would be great if u wrote it! Ur others smuts r amazing btw Thanks:)

uhh sorry i’ve been dead i am a busy girl 

Word Count: 1,735

Originally posted by ianmickgallagher

You and Carl came from different worlds. You weren’t from the south side, and when you started attending his high school, you were the outcast. Your expensive clothes and name brand lunches set you apart from the rest of the south side high schoolers. You moved to Chicago after your parents split, and your dad brought you back to his hometown. Everyone viewed you as a rich bitch even though you were in the same boat as most of them. A lot of the guys hit on you, or tried to get you in bed, always wanting to be the one banging the rich girl. You turned down everyone and your reputation grew from rich bitch to rich prude. Carl, however, interested you. He had been sporting cornrows for your first few weeks in town, and he had recently taken them out. After this, his attitude changed as well. So after months of continuous flirting, you agreed to let him walk you home from school. At the end of your last class you found him waiting in the hallway.

“Didn’t forget? Surprising.” You comment while you both walk outside.

“Could never forget about you babe.” He says smiling at you. 

“Do you actually want to walk me home? or is there some ulterior motive?” You ask honestly. You know he doesn’t give a shit about walking you home safely. 

“I still can if you want. But I wanted to ask you something.” He paused and gave you a hopeful smile, making you slightly nervous. “Will you eat dinner with my family tonight? I told them I had a girlfriend as an excuse to stay out all night, and now they want me to bring someone over.” 

“Sure. Dinner with the Gallaghers should be fun.” You had heard all the stories about his family, they seemed exciting. He looked surprised by your answer.

“Wait-Really?” 

“Why not? I’m not as much of a bitch as everyone thinks. I’m also not a prude.” You say with a wink. “Lead the way.” He smirks and pulls you with him towards his neighborhood.

Keep reading

Predictable (Prompt Fill)

For @idkmantoomanyships.
I don’t know if this is exactly where you wanted this to go?? But hopefully you like it!

*************************

There were probably more things to be worrying about– like the mad titan with world destruction on his mind– but all Steve could think about was how entirely un-worried about everything Tony was.

Tony was completely, 100% non-worried about anything, it seemed. In fact other than his initial comment about being called in because everything apparently went to shit without him there, Tony hadn’t even acknowledged the seriousness of their situation. Hadn’t even broached the topic of you know–hey the world is ending…

And that worried Steve. And he wasn’t the only one who noticed.

Natasha and Clint had brought it to his attention first, pointing out that Tony was involved in a drinking contest with Starlord instead of attending a meeting. Shot after shot was being poured and Tony was slamming them down just as fast as the space…guardian…whatever. Everyone was laughing and cheering and Tony kept banging his hand on the table and laughing and calling for more.

And then later in the week, it was Wanda who cleared her throat loudly and and raised her eyebrow in the general direction of a group of aliens and humans with Tony at the center. He was in full armor, two minutes into an arm wrestling competition with someone they weren’t familiar with. Money was being thrown down on the table between them, and Tony had that infuriating smirk on his face that said ‘I’ve already won this, you just don’t know’ and sure enough, with in a few seconds he pushed his opponent’s hand over onto the table and the crowd roared in disbelief. Tony just grinned, looking perfectly pleased and perfectly happy.

The last straw had been when Steve himself had stumbled into what looked like a fairly private moment between Tony and Stephen Strange. They had been bent over a book, skimming the pages, and Strange had said…something… in that deep voice of his and Tony had burst into laughter. Absolutely just dropped his head back and laughed so hard he fell out of his chair and onto the floor and the Doctor had helped him up with a gentle smile and an arm around his waist. Tony looked like he had leaned into the embrace a little, looked like maybe he scooted his chair a little closer to Strange when they went back to reading.

And that moment, for more reasons than Steve wanted to think about, really really bothered him.

Keep reading

it was just a matter of time- riarkle headcanon

-Riley and farkle move away for college because they got into colleges hella close to eachother (because of course they did)

 -Maya and lucas move in together too cuz lucas is going to vet school 30 min away from where maya goes to art school

-So they rent an apartment

-So what do you do when you buy an apartment together? you furnish an apartment together

-Farkles parents basically ruffle his hair and toss a credit card at him when he tells them so riley decides that just this once she can take advantage of the situation

-Riley is very into interior design

-Farkle is very into riley

-So he just kinda agrees with her on everything and she designs a BANGING apartment

-At one point she goes into a pottery barn and goes “ill take that” to the salesclerk

-“What, the chair?”

-“No. the room.”

-It ends up looking fantastic because of course it does

-So college starts, riley is an overachiever of course and takes way too many classes and is constantly sleep deprived

-Which means Riley falls asleep on Farkle a lot and one time when she falls asleep on the couch surrounded by textbooks Farkle picks her up and puts her in bed

-She calls him superman for a week after she realizes what he did

-Farkle and riley facetime Lucaya at one point and lucaya’s like “lol they’re so in love”

-Oh! yeah

- so farkle is always getting into situations that require riley to save him

-“Riley please help I lied to the cool frat guys and told them i was dating someone will you pretend to be my girlfriend for a night thank you I love you”

-He gets into these situations on purpose tho obviously

-One time Riley breaks her left arm slipping on ice and Farkle takes care of her a lot (smoothies and carrying stuff for her because she is a c r y b a b y )

-And another time Farkle has an emotional breakdown over not being the best and Riley comforts him and they fall asleep in each-others arms

-Fast forward a few months and Ok Lucas and Maya  are getting MARRIED What the FUCK theyre so young??? Whatever lets support it wait it’s a destination wedding what the FUCK just be my date (There’s one bed in the hotel room motherfuckers you know what that means…. Hardcore cuddles get ur mind out of the gutter smh) (They slow dance at the reception and then they’re super buzzed and KISS and stare at each other for a long time and then the song ends and they never talk about the kiss)

-Oh and one time Riley gets stalked by this really creepy guy and Farkle to the rescue (he puts on like 6 jackets and follows the guy down the street at night and pushes him up against a wall and says in a really deep voice ‘stay away from riley.” and the guy goes running and never bothers riley again)

-So after freshman year Cory asks if they’re going to be living together forever and Riley just shrugs and says “i don’t see why not”

-Fast forward and they go to a halloween party sophomore year and Theres an apple bobbing station and Farkles like “remember when I saved your life twice” And riley kisses his cheek and goes ‘my hero’ and their friends see this

-and said friends make them make out in truth or dare

-Riley wants to talk about it the next day but farkle just says ‘just forget it Riley, Its nothing” because he thinks that Riley was gonna reject him and rileys like ‘oh wow ok’ and the next few weeks are super awkward.

-But riley wasnt gonna reject him

-She was gonna ask him to go out with her

-But FINE FARKLE HAVE IT YOUR WAY

-So like shes sulking around the house all the time feeling all dejected

-And so is farkle

-But riley is PISSED at farkle

-But also highkey pining for him

-And farkle is highkey pining for her

-So much angst jfc

-Then he’s gonna leave for a month over thanksgiving break to visit his family and Riley is just standing in the doorway and he sees her looking just so empty and he just says ‘fuck it” and kisses her

-Shes all happy for like 8 seconds and then she just. Punches him. In the face.

-And hes like “RILEY WHAT THE HELL”

-And shes like “SORRY BUT YOU DONT GET TO REJECT ME AND THEN JUST KISS ME”

-And hes like “WHAT THE FUCK??? YOU REJECTED ME”

-“WHAT?”

-“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT”

-The general consensus is “??????????????????????????????????”

-And so farkle calls his dad and just says “SOMETHING CAME UP”, walks to the kitchen clutching his nose to get an ice pack and just turns around and yells “ARE YOU COMING OR NOT”

-She follows him because she is Very Confused™ and feels bad about punching him

-So hes just sitting at the table with a pack of frozen peas pressed to his face and if riley werent so upset shed laugh becuase he looks like a mop of hair and two eyes on top of a bag of frozen vegetables

-“Well? Are you going to sit down?”

-She does

-There is 2 minutes and 17 seconds of silence

-They both counted

-She breaks it with “sorry for punching you”

-He just puts down the peas and goes “please explain”

-She probably owes him that she decides

-“Well you see i guess i’d had these subconscious feelings for you and then we made out and suddenly they were very conscious and i wanted to talk to you about it and maybe see if it was going to go somewhere but then you rejected me”

-It is at this point that farkle slams his head into the table

-“OH MY GOD RILEY”

-“WHAT”

-If farkle wasnt already bleeding from his nose he wouldve punched himself

-THE  GIRL HE HAD BEEN IN LOVE WITH SINCE HE WAS 7 YEARS OLD WAS RETURNING HIS FEELINGS AND HE REJECTED THEM WITHOUT KNOWING

-WHAT THE FUCK FARKLE

-“RILEY I AM SO SORRY I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO TALK BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO TELL ME NOTHING COULD EVER HAPPEN AND I DIDNT WANT TO HEAR THAT SO I JUST”

-“WAIT FARKLE WHAT ARE YOU SAYING”

-“OF COURSE I WANT IT TO GO SOMEWHERE RILEY”

-“YOU DO?”

-“YES”

-It is at this point that farkle vaults over the table, LIFTS riley out of her chair, and kisses her like there’s no tommorrow

-They stand there kissing for a solid 7 minutes (in heaven lmao puns)

-But then riley realizes that farkle is still very much injured

-“Um babe maybe we should get you to a hospital”

-“Yes i am decently sure my nose is broken you throw a great right hook”

-It is not, in fact, broken, just badly bruised

-The doctor asks “what happened?” and they both say “bar fight” at the same time

-So they send farkle home with some tape and an icepack and he recovers quickly

-Which is great because riley feels SO BAD

-Apologizing 24/7

-she makes him soup and brings him ice cream and makes him a goddamn “sorry i punched you babe i love you” poster

-And she really wants to make out with him

-Stupid miscommunicating nerds

-Love them

-Riarkle for life

-Thank u

-The end

Everything is too much to even be everything everything isn’t even a word anymore , last few days bleeding into weeks delirious at full speed… A lot is happening on every frequency We feel like a tiny butterfly being hurled around in a hurricane … I am not worried I have had a lot of guidance from my angels and guides and we are leading up to gold,

When I was sick in hospital once a doctor explained to me that “in my culture the crescendo of songs is not in the middle chorus but at the end, as the song is about to finish the noise gets louder and louder then banging and the chaos is loud loud loud it’s chaos crash bang crash, end” I believe we are in this song when everything is banging so loudly together we cannot hear anything but chaos. But it’s the end of the song. Everything will be okay. They told me to tell you this, you are chosen, wear your most colourful coats and dream the dream, you will no longer be persecuted for your dreaming